Quote: (05-29-2015 05:09 PM)Onto Wrote:
It's been said, "Love is life's greatest teacher, because it's lessons are the most harsh."
Remember that the real purpose of love, and relationships in general, is to teach us about ourselves, to see who we are. A lot of that seeing will be into our own dark-side and theirs.
This seeing can bring about liberating self-knowledge. Aside from that, the experience alone cultivates our wisdom, even if we can't articulate it.
Given the above, no unsuccessful relationship is really a waste.
What you're saying is true, but the conclusion you arrived at only works if a person learns from the mistakes that were made in the previous relationship(s).
Everybody can't "see". In fact, most people choose to not "see".
That's why most people end up in the same type of relationships, but with different people, especially women.
The reason women don't see is simply because they don't look at themselves nor their behavior as a problem, so they will continue to be the same people and engage others in the same fashion, and when shit goes left, they'll always look at the other person as the problem and figure out how to make themselves look like the one who was wronged.
The reason men don't see is that they continue to hope for women to live up to their expectations, as if women come to us in ready-made packages -- most don't, most can't. A woman is like a pet, she has to be trained to engage in certain behavior.
If all guys are going to do with a particular girl is fuck her, then how can we expect her to know how to actually take care of a guy? Nobody's making her do that, or learn about what it takes to do that, they're just concerned with getting into her box, so you have some girls out here who really just know how to get sexual, and they're deriving their value solely from their ability to do that. They want awards for knowing how to deep throat dicks and reverse cowgirl to the finish line, but they don't know how to do laundry nor how to make a good bowl of oatmeal -- a Jewish girl once made me the worst bowl of oatmeal I've ever had in life, I could have dumped in a bowl and topped it with honey and it would have tasted better.
It doesn't help that today's mothers are failing to teach their daughters anything of value as it pertains to contributing something positive to a man's life, all their efforts are towards making sure they get theirs, and making everything about themselves.
Luther has another post where he places the blame for that on men, and yes men have some responsibility in that, but that responsibility is shared, if a woman wants to be a good woman, she can choose to work towards being a good woman, she can figure out what it's going to take to be desired by a man and be able to lock down that man -- ugly women play that game better than anybody -- if she wants to, or she can do what most women are doing, which is to be accepted as they are, and if you can't do that, no worries, they'll just find the next ignorant dude online somewhere who will put up with some shit until that person no longer cares to put up with some shit, and the cycle will continue.