rooshvforum.network is a fully functional forum: you can search, register, post new threads etc...
Old accounts are inaccessible: register a new one, or recover it when possible. x


How Important is it to Love Your LTR?
#26

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Quote: (05-26-2015 08:07 PM)hwuzhere Wrote:  

I'm usually pretty supportive of what he has to say because he talks about stepping your game up and improving yourself but this is where Jariel is getting poisonous. Marriage is about love from start to finish at the start because you have appreciation for a female then later on to raising the children. Coming from an immigrant family it was the only thing keeping us together.

I hate a lot of my family as people, but because of the love that bonds family together I stick with them through thick and thin. I raised up my two younger brothers with my parents and if it wasn't love keeping me with them then it might as well have been a waste of time. Same deal with my parents they were and are still at each other's throats but the home cooked meals and well maintained house coupled with my dad putting food on the table make it worthwhile. I can sure as hell tell you in a family that no job is easy for either parent with both busting their asses. It's not about comfort or ease but making something greater and raising up the next generation.

What's your background Jariel? What kind of playboy dark triad lifestyle are you on about? Have you even met any members who can vouch for what you're saying? I just find it disgusting that people could mock the structure of families while hiding behind a computer screen like they are some super alpha.

Woah, slow way down.

It's cool that you disagree with me on this one, but if you look at what I was responding to, this isn't a guy in a happy LTR with a woman he wants to marry and have children with, and I'm saying, "No dude, don't do that".

He's talking about a girl who has been disrespectful to him throughout their relationship and who he has left repeatedly only to go back, I've written a number of posts specifically about that particular topic not just in my own RTS threads but in responses to other guys' situations in which they are asking for advice.

That is what I'm responding to, translating it into "don't do LTRs" or mocking the family structure, this guy isn't even married, so your response is ridiculous in that regard.

I don't want guys in LTRs with shitty, fucking women. I don't want guys settling and taking what's comfortable and buying into bullshit philosophies like "the devil you know".

Most of my posts are specifically for guys who are in relationships, I've said that in a number of my posts that those are the guys who a lot of the information that I share is for.

I am not Roosh, nor am I'm trying to be, but I've shared enough of my background on here via a number of posts, so I'm not going to dignify that question with an answer. If you don't consider my perspectives "valid", or feel negatively towards them, that is your right to do so.

I have no problem responding to you directly because you're not trolling or baiting, and if you have any further questions, I have no problem answering them privately.

I speak to guys privately all the time who ask for my opinions on their situations, so jumping onto someone else's trolling opinion towards me, you're better than that as you can think for yourself.
Reply
#27

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Dagnasty

Since I know alot more about you personally than most of the crew, we should have a long talk sometime this week.

Without going too deeply into your own personal life there are a few things that stand out. Some we have already discussed before.

1) You went into the new LTR too soon after that breakup. You need more time for perspective and introspection.

2) Toxic relationships are hard to move on from until your broader understanding can take hold.

3) Do not mistake passion for love. They are not the same. Do not mistake violence and poor impulse control for concern either. If they care about your physical well being, they would never raise a hand at you like that.

4) Your ex had a very poor temperament as a woman and a person. Since you cannot fully understand it, the new woman's extremely mature temperament confuses you for a lack of concern.

5) You are lacking a solid goal. With no goal, you are lacking direction and purpose. The new woman's purpose for your life was never mentioned by you. That tells me that the problem definitely is not her, but your lack of conviction.

6) Why do you always want LTRs? Repeat sex? Comfort? Stability? Ease? Looking for love? Be honest with yourself.

7) Are you truly exhausting all of your options or are you getting lazy due to the lack of available talent in your area? Most of the travel guys here know you have a strong vice for Taiwanese/Chinese women, especially with certain kinds of hair/looks. Your current main fits probably half of that bill. Your exgf is the same thing. She fits half of that bill. It's been said before, but I will say it again, always chase what you want, especially for LTR or deeper. Never be afraid to pause and re-calibrate on what you want.

I have more thoughts but I will save them for when we talk.

I'm not going to get into this LTR stuff is not about love or whatever (love itself is not rational at all), but LTRs are not the same as marriage Hwuzhere. Too many reasons to list and I don't have the time, but I will cite the lack of sacrifice as the top reason. Family or blood is fundamentally too different from a LTR as well. Lots of you guys are players and still working this stuff out for yourselves. Scorpion and a few others have made extremely thoughtful posts on this stuff before. Beating you over the head with it repeatedly won't necessarily help you guys figure it out. Some things you guys are going to need to figure out on your own. I just hope you all don't figure it out at 60.

Dating Guide for Mainland China Datasheet
TravelerKai's Martial Arts Datasheet
1 John 4:20 - If anyone says, I love God, and hates (detests, abominates) his brother [in Christ], he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, Whom he has not seen.
Reply
#28

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Quote: (05-26-2015 08:35 PM)TravelerKai Wrote:  

Dagnasty

Since I know alot more about you personally than most of the crew, we should have a long talk sometime this week.

Without going too deeply into your own personal life there are a few things that stand out. Some we have already discussed before.

1) You went into the new LTR too soon after that breakup. You need more time for perspective and introspection.

2) Toxic relationships are hard to move on from until your broader understanding can take hold.

3) Do not mistake passion for love. They are not the same. Do not mistake violence and poor impulse control for concern either. If they care about your physical well being, they would never raise a hand at you like that.

4) Your ex had a very poor temperament as a woman and a person. Since you cannot fully understand it, the new woman's extremely mature temperament confuses you for a lack of concern.

5) You are lacking a solid goal. With no goal, you are lacking direction and purpose. The new woman's purpose for your life was never mentioned by you. That tells me that the problem definitely is not her, but your lack of conviction.

6) Why do you always want LTRs? Repeat sex? Comfort? Stability? Ease? Looking for love? Be honest with yourself.

7) Are you truly exhausting all of your options or are you getting lazy due to the lack of available talent in your area? Most of the travel guys here know you have a strong vice for Taiwanese/Chinese women, especially with certain kinds of hair/looks. Your current main fits probably half of that bill. Your exgf is the same thing. She fits half of that bill. It's been said before, but I will say it again, always chase what you want, especially for LTR or deeper. Never be afraid to pause and re-calibrate on what you want.

I have more thoughts but I will save them for when we talk.

I'm not going to get into this LTR stuff is not about love or whatever (love itself is not rational at all), but LTRs are not the same as marriage Hwuzhere. Too many reasons to list and I don't have the time, but I will cite the lack of sacrifice as the top reason. Family or blood is fundamentally too different from a LTR as well. Lots of you guys are players and still working this stuff out for yourselves. Scorpion and a few others have made extremely thoughtful posts on this stuff before. Beating you over the head with it repeatedly won't necessarily help you guys figure it out. Some things you guys are going to need to figure out on your own. I just hope you all don't figure it out at 60.

TK's post is on-point, I personally don't speak on marriage as I am not married, but how a bad LTR got translated into marriage and family structure is beyond me.

Originally, I was trying to convey the point that LTRs are not solely about love and emotions. You have guys in bad relationships, and they rationalize their in-out behavior with loving and caring for the girl, when that part of the equation really doesn't even make sense.

A lot of that rationalizing comes from a place of fear. It's understandable that maybe you've invested years of your life into someone, and you don't want to just let that go, but sometimes that's the wiser decision, because those situations don't get better. You don't go from she's disrespecting me, I love her-I love her not, to everything's great, we're going to live happily ever after.

You have to have the courage and the strength to accept that maybe you're going to have to go back out into the world alone, work on yourself a little bit, so that you can be a better man, a wiser man, and eventually having the type of relationship you want instead of accepting the relationship that someone is trying to give you.
Reply
#29

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Quote: (05-26-2015 08:27 PM)jariel Wrote:  

Quote: (05-26-2015 08:07 PM)hwuzhere Wrote:  

I'm usually pretty supportive of what he has to say because he talks about stepping your game up and improving yourself but this is where Jariel is getting poisonous. Marriage is about love from start to finish at the start because you have appreciation for a female then later on to raising the children. Coming from an immigrant family it was the only thing keeping us together.

I hate a lot of my family as people, but because of the love that bonds family together I stick with them through thick and thin. I raised up my two younger brothers with my parents and if it wasn't love keeping me with them then it might as well have been a waste of time. Same deal with my parents they were and are still at each other's throats but the home cooked meals and well maintained house coupled with my dad putting food on the table make it worthwhile. I can sure as hell tell you in a family that no job is easy for either parent with both busting their asses. It's not about comfort or ease but making something greater and raising up the next generation.

What's your background Jariel? What kind of playboy dark triad lifestyle are you on about? Have you even met any members who can vouch for what you're saying? I just find it disgusting that people could mock the structure of families while hiding behind a computer screen like they are some super alpha.

Woah, slow way down.

It's cool that you disagree with me on this one, but if you look at what I was responding to, this isn't a guy in a happy LTR with a woman he wants to marry and have children with, and I'm saying, "No dude, don't do that".

He's talking about a girl who has been disrespectful to him throughout their relationship and who he has left repeatedly only to go back, I've written a number of posts specifically about that particular topic not just in my own RTS threads but in responses to other guys' situations in which they are asking for advice.

That is what I'm responding to, translating it into "don't do LTRs" or mocking the family structure, this guy isn't even married, so your response is ridiculous in that regard.

I don't want guys in LTRs with shitty, fucking women. I don't want guys settling and taking what's comfortable and buying into bullshit philosophies like "the devil you know".

Most of my posts are specifically for guys who are in relationships, I've said that in a number of my posts that those are the guys who a lot of the information that I share is for.

I am not Roosh, nor am I'm trying to be, but I've shared enough of my background on here via a number of posts, so I'm not going to dignify that question with an answer. If you don't consider my perspectives "valid", or feel negatively towards them, that is your right to do so.

I have no problem responding to you directly because you're not trolling or baiting, and if you have any further questions, I have no problem answering them privately.

I speak to guys privately all the time who ask for my opinions on their situations, so jumping onto someone else's trolling opinion towards me, you're better than that as you can think for yourself.

Well I remember you from your real talks and Miami info, but that's all I know about you to be completely honest. I just personally don't like the use of general language in regards to any kind of situation especially that it's a women's biological programming to try to share misery or to simply status hop. Again private message would be better to settle this.

"Until the day when God shall deign to reveal the future to man, all human wisdom is summed up in these two words,— 'Wait and hope'."- Alexander Dumas, "The Count of Monte Cristo"

Fashion/Style Lounge

Social Circle Game

Team Skinny Girls with Pretty Faces
King of Sockpuppets

Sockpuppet List
Reply
#30

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Quote: (05-26-2015 08:07 PM)hwuzhere Wrote:  

Marriage is about love from start to finish at the start because you have appreciation for a female then later on to raising the children. Coming from an immigrant family it was the only thing keeping us together.

Though I have never been married, I do not think marriage is about love from start to finish. At least not in the way that the media is always pitching it. This is coming from a guy who thought he would lose his virginity to his wife on his wedding night. I am also a closet romantic comedy fan and enjoy that shit with Hugh Grant in it.

Back in the day, a lot of people get married to survive. It doesn't mean that love wasn't there, or couldn't grow into something but it was never the shit you see in the movies. That is the stuff Hollywood has been shoveling for the last few decades, which I will own, I enjoy watching at times - just has to make me laugh along with the sappy.

I think partly why there is such a high divorce rate is this misguided thinking about what love is. So many people have this belief of what love should feel like, even though they have never felt it. So they are comparing everything they feel to what they think they should feel. And then when it fails to meet it - they get frustrated and quit.

There is love poem from Corinthians "love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud." It fails to mention love is work and it does not quit.

I still hope for marriage, kids and love. I won't give up on these goals, but as I am lived, my perspective has changed a bit. Of course I will love my wife. Maybe it won't be the intoxicating feelings thing like a teenage movie. But if love has been the foundation of marriage, why do so many fail? IF I TRULY LOVE my wife and my kids, I will have to remain partly detached to maintain frame in order to properly guide my family. I believe that demonstrates a man's love more than anything is how well he guides and cares for his family. And he can't do that when he is caught up in silly stuff/chaos.

As far as an immigrant family goes, I think immigrants tend to bring many of their strong cultural values which in many ways are superior to Western values. They often bond through hardships. Which many western marriages do not.

Edit: Speaking of appreciating women. It brings up something I heard that you can either respect or adore your woman, but you can't do both, anyone ever hear of that?

Fate whispers to the warrior, "You cannot withstand the storm." And the warrior whispers back, "I am the storm."

Women and children can be careless, but not men - Don Corleone

Great RVF Comments | Where Evil Resides | How to upload, etc. | New Members Read This 1 | New Members Read This 2
Reply
#31

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Quote: (05-26-2015 07:01 PM)Brian Shima Wrote:  

From an out sider looking in, it seems like Jariel was burned/hurt by a LTR in the past. While on one hand, that anger can make for GREAT content like Real Talk Sessions, it can also make one jaded and clutching onto the past.

I can speak for myself, I was not "burned" by any past relationships. I've left my situations on my terms, because I can make my own assessments based off facts without letting "feelings" get in the way of having to make decisions.

There's no anger here, because you can't do anything with being angry, unless you re-channel that anger into positive energy, in which at that point, it's no longer anger.

Look at my posts, do they really come across as someone who's angry?

I start my shit with Aaliyah gifs and shit, I have fun with the things I write.

Unfortunately, this game is not pretty, dealing with women is not pretty, I wish it was, but it isn't, you have to go down enough paths to get to that point, everything I say is from my own personal experiences, I'm not making this stuff up, it's not hypothetical.

We all have our own unique perspectives, I see guys talking about things that honestly don't happen to me, such as flaking, false rape charges, but that doesn't make their perspectives invalid, just because I haven't experienced them.

Fortis, I'm using this post to respond to you, because you're one of my dudes, and we've spoken privately as well.

I've always said, look if you've got a great girl, rock with that. A lot of these situations, like the OPs and others who I've addressed recently, they're dealing with girls who are giving them toxic relationships. All that, "we've broken up several times" and this and that, those are bad relationships that dudes need to rid themselves of.

However, I've always said look, if she's that special, if you can't help yourself, or whatever the situation, then stop fronting with yourself, and with the community here, and just be with her; forget about the game, and just be with that chick, if that's what you really want.

Be honest with yourself about your situation and your feelings.

However, I always conclude that those guys don't really want those girls based off what those guys say, they want something else, something better, that's easier said then done, but going after it is better than the alternative, because no one ever says at the end of the day, they were happy with the alternative.

My latest thread, we're talking about settling, settling for men and women is different.

When women settle, they accept decent guys who maybe give them most of the things they want in a man, but not every fuckin' thing, so for them, that's settling.

When guys settle, they accept a bad relationship. They accept a woman who is disrespectful, they accept all of the heartache and mental anguish that comes from being with said woman, it's gambling, and sometimes they rationalize that gambling by claiming they love her, care for her, or they might be in a situation where the two of them have had children together, so they do it for the family, because "that's the right thing to do".

When guys present us with situations and we can help them make the right decision to not double down on that toxicity, then that's exactly what we need to do.

When guys find that woman who cares for them and who they care for, then we need to make sure that don't create a grass is greener scenario.

There's no agenda with me, no unhappiness, you can't be what I've worked hard to become, on some anger shit, truly angry people, stay angry, and they never get anywhere as a result, because they don't do anything about being mad other than accept being mad.
Reply
#32

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Gave my super red pill uncle a call.

Best summed up by:

"A boy does what he wants. A man does what he has to."

He got me back on the wagon.

To anyone who finds this in the future, forget your exes.

You left them behind for a reason - it's important to remember why.
Reply
#33

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Quote: (05-26-2015 09:03 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

Quote: (05-26-2015 08:07 PM)hwuzhere Wrote:  

Marriage is about love from start to finish at the start because you have appreciation for a female then later on to raising the children. Coming from an immigrant family it was the only thing keeping us together.

Though I have never been married, I do not think marriage is about love from start to finish. At least not in the way that the media is always pitching it. This is coming from a guy who thought he would lose his virginity to his wife on his wedding night. I am also a closet romantic comedy fan and enjoy that shit with Hugh Grant in it.

Back in the day, a lot of people get married to survive. It doesn't mean that love wasn't there, or couldn't grow into something but it was never the shit you see in the movies. That is the stuff Hollywood has been shoveling for the last few decades, which I will own, I enjoy watching at times - just has to make me laugh along with the sappy.

I think partly why there is such a high divorce rate is this misguided thinking about what love is. So many people have this belief of what love should feel like, even though they have never felt it. So they are comparing everything they feel to what they think they should feel but not having experienced this magical love. And then when it fails to meet it - they get frustrated and quit.

There is love poem from Corinthians "love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud." It fails to mention love is work and it does not quit.

I still hope for marriage, kids and love. Maybe it won't be the intoxicating feelings thing like a teenage movie. But if love has been the foundation of marriage, why do so many fail?

As far as an immigrant family goes, I think immigrants tend to bring many of their strong cultural values which in many ways are superior to Western values. They often bond through hardships. Which many western marriages do not.

Edit: Speaking of appreciating women. It brings up something I heard that you can either respect or adore your woman, but you can't do both, anyone ever hear of that?

Hell no I can't even watch a Hollywood romantic comedy without barfing. For me and my family it means the creation of a stable family unit and raising kids. There has to be loved involved with raising kids not the ideal romanticized shit.

If there isn't love and appreciation I see no value in marriage though. Love/passion is needed to get the initial phase going(big emphasis on why losing virginity on the wedding night in the Old World is emphasized). Then when the kids come the love for the kids has to keep the relationship going in traditional roles with the mother looking after the kids and the father winning the bread.

Think of it like this. The mother can report on the child's day to day rearing and making sure they are raised properly thereby relating to them on an emotional, feminine level while the father is the tough hand that instills values. Women are emotional men are logical the ying and yang. Therefore there is a different kind of love felt towards the child.

Afterward when the mother and father get older the man learns to appreciate the wife taking care of his needs in their old age with help from the children financially as well as emotionally with pride in the children they've raised.

One way the Old World is superior in this regard is that filial piety and emphasis on love for the parents provides an eternal circle where everyone's needs are taken care of at the end of the day. It's also why divorces are harder. Love is forced where you either love and adapt or die due to social exclusion/basic needs.

The Western Model simply shoves the grandparents into retirement homes and having little to no emphasis on taking care of the elderly. Couple that with both parents working therefore there is no emotional safeguarding of the children and the ease of divorce. Here you have economic selfishness outweigh the family unit. Money>connections with the family. The family sure takes "cool" vacations and has that new plasma screen T.V., but at the end of the day prioritizing luxury and vapid fads seems to take priority of raising stable families.




On respecting versus adoring woman. I think it's mainly because you either adore women and the sex you get from them, but you can't respect them because of what you've made a women do for you. On the other hand if you respect women you get the biological basis of it all, and you can't adore the ethereal femininity of it because of the base logic behind it.

"Until the day when God shall deign to reveal the future to man, all human wisdom is summed up in these two words,— 'Wait and hope'."- Alexander Dumas, "The Count of Monte Cristo"

Fashion/Style Lounge

Social Circle Game

Team Skinny Girls with Pretty Faces
King of Sockpuppets

Sockpuppet List
Reply
#34

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

hwuzhere, most people seek that romanticized shit.

Fate whispers to the warrior, "You cannot withstand the storm." And the warrior whispers back, "I am the storm."

Women and children can be careless, but not men - Don Corleone

Great RVF Comments | Where Evil Resides | How to upload, etc. | New Members Read This 1 | New Members Read This 2
Reply
#35

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Quote: (05-26-2015 09:12 PM)Dagnasty Wrote:  

Gave my super red pill uncle a call.

Best summed up by:

"A boy does what he wants. A man does what he has to."

He got me back on the wagon.

To anyone who finds this in the future, forget your exes.

You left them behind for a reason - it's important to remember why.

Dag, you've gotten to the heart of what I stated here:

The One Thing To Remember When You Leave Her

Glad you got where you needed to be, good luck as you move forward.
Reply
#36

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Quote: (05-26-2015 09:22 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

hwuzhere, most people seek that romanticized shit.

Always assumed with this whole push with neomasculinity that it was written in the memo. Idealized romanticism of marriage is bullshit. It's hard work and long hours at the job for the man while the woman has to make sure the kids get good grades, grow up to have something going for them, and help make them well rounded individuals.

My own mother told me this when I really fucked up one time. Obvious loose translation but this should give you the gist:

"Thing is I'm not in this for me. You and your brothers are the reason I'm busting my ass here. Back home we could have used all the money your dad earned here to hire servants as well as a driver and live comfortably. We're here so you get a good education and make something of yourself. I have nothing here but you three."

"Until the day when God shall deign to reveal the future to man, all human wisdom is summed up in these two words,— 'Wait and hope'."- Alexander Dumas, "The Count of Monte Cristo"

Fashion/Style Lounge

Social Circle Game

Team Skinny Girls with Pretty Faces
King of Sockpuppets

Sockpuppet List
Reply
#37

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Quote: (05-26-2015 09:03 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

Quote: (05-26-2015 08:07 PM)hwuzhere Wrote:  

Marriage is about love from start to finish at the start because you have appreciation for a female then later on to raising the children. Coming from an immigrant family it was the only thing keeping us together.

Though I have never been married, I do not think marriage is about love from start to finish. At least not in the way that the media is always pitching it. This is coming from a guy who thought he would lose his virginity to his wife on his wedding night. I am also a closet romantic comedy fan and enjoy that shit with Hugh Grant in it.

Back in the day, a lot of people get married to survive. It doesn't mean that love wasn't there, or couldn't grow into something but it was never the shit you see in the movies. That is the stuff Hollywood has been shoveling for the last few decades, which I will own, I enjoy watching at times - just has to make me laugh along with the sappy.

I think partly why there is such a high divorce rate is this misguided thinking about what love is. So many people have this belief of what love should feel like, even though they have never felt it. So they are comparing everything they feel to what they think they should feel. And then when it fails to meet it - they get frustrated and quit.

There is love poem from Corinthians "love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud." It fails to mention love is work and it does not quit.

I still hope for marriage, kids and love. I won't give up on these goals, but as I am lived, my perspective has changed a bit. Of course I will love my wife. Maybe it won't be the intoxicating feelings thing like a teenage movie. But if love has been the foundation of marriage, why do so many fail? IF I TRULY LOVE my wife and my kids, I will have to remain partly detached to maintain frame in order to properly guide my family. I believe that demonstrates a man's love more than anything is how well he guides and cares for his family. And he can't do that when he is caught up in silly stuff/chaos.

As far as an immigrant family goes, I think immigrants tend to bring many of their strong cultural values which in many ways are superior to Western values. They often bond through hardships. Which many western marriages do not.

Edit: Speaking of appreciating women. It brings up something I heard that you can either respect or adore your woman, but you can't do both, anyone ever hear of that?

Nice write up SSS.

I've never been married either. I was engaged in my early 20s and called that off when my ex-fiancé lost her mind and became physically abusive (I still have a scar from a wound that required stitches). Needless to say, my perspective on marriage/kids was "recalibrated" from that experience.

OTOH, I've written about my Uncle and Aunt as an example of a happily married couple.
http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-42999-...#pid896888
In a different and better time, yes, you could experience intoxicating love that survived tough times as well as great times and everything in between. Those times are pretty much long gone.

“….and we will win, and you will win, and we will keep on winning, and eventually you will say… we can’t take all of this winning, …please Mr. Trump …and I will say, NO, we will win, and we will keep on winning”.

- President Donald J. Trump
Reply
#38

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

YossariansRight, I agree it is just a different time and a different set of values. I would like to have what my parent's have but even they know it is hard to recreate that in today's world.

I am not trying to be a pessimist nor am I going to stop believing that I will meet the right person, but I do know that I can wait around for the 1% of the girls who may still offer that in the US or branch out where the odds may be better.

Fate whispers to the warrior, "You cannot withstand the storm." And the warrior whispers back, "I am the storm."

Women and children can be careless, but not men - Don Corleone

Great RVF Comments | Where Evil Resides | How to upload, etc. | New Members Read This 1 | New Members Read This 2
Reply
#39

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Quote: (05-26-2015 09:57 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

YossariansRight, I agree it is just a different time and a different set of values. I would like to have what my parent's have but even they know it is hard to recreate that in today's world.

Sam, we talked about that in the Mothers Day post, our mothers are a dying breed, the women we are dealing with are not like our mothers.

As a result, we're not getting to have the types of relationships we saw our parents have.

Obviously, that doesn't go for everybody, but it's really difficult for most people.

One of the most famous discussions we've had here is about Happy Hour, we have men out here who don't believe in spending money on chicks during Happy Hour, chicks who they are trying to form some sort of relationship with.

If you're in that place from a fundamental standpoint, where does the relationship go from there?

When does she become a girl who you'd be more than happy to spend your money on and share your time and resources with?

That place simply comes from how they view the girl, it's not really being about guys being broke, cheap, or whatever, it just has to do with the fact that at the end of the day they don't value that girl enough to put her on that level, and it's often because she hasn't really done anything to earn that level of consideration, other than just show up.

I think our generation has found out that things aren't as easy as we thought they were going to be.

The things that we want out of life are hard to come by, everyone's not going to have them, but that's because everyone is not willing to work for them, on top of the fact that those things are inherently finite.
Reply
#40

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Masculinity is about learning every emotion, and then controlling it. That road is the path to the red pill. When another man tells you to avoid part of that road, tread lightly. The internet is full of cowards and snakes. Jariel is both.

Nothing has changed in the 1000's of years man has been on this planet.
Reply
#41

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Quote: (05-26-2015 05:25 PM)jariel Wrote:  

...
Women use your emotions to get you connected so that they can implement their strategy, which at the end of the day is to either find someone who is willing and able to makes their lives easier or someone who's willing to go through their miseries with them.
...

This is key. I've been there. Thought I'd just keep her around as a fuck buddy but she made sure the HELL got worse, and hooks in deeper to ruin my life along with the destructive path she leaves in her wake.

I agree somewhat that fixing the situation with another woman(s) isn't always going to work. What you have to see and BELIEVE is that your experiences, your observations of who she REALLY IS, and what she's REALLY about are not misconceptions but spot on the truth.

In fact, in my case, it took 6 months of distance from her to completely understand just how bad of a person she is, whether I fell in love with that fucking crap or not.

The grand illusion of what a succubus projects, and thus is digested by some of us, runs so many levels deep we think we figured them all out after 6 months, a year, 3 years, a marriage, a lifetime... but even at that, we've only peeled back some of the paint.

My ex was everything negative about American women to the 1000th degree, and the more I learned how bad she was, the greater her skill at disguising it became.

So ask yourself, is love worth pure misery? You know the answer.
Reply
#42

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

delete
Reply
#43

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

This thread wasn't going in the direction OP was hoping for..... C'mon guys. Let's not derail this thread with extraneous stuff. Carry it to PM.


But seriously, OP, don't jump into another LTR with a woman who you know is crazy. Do something crazy to avoid her: delete numbers, don't reply to texts, block her number etc. You don't sound like you're in any shape to avoid being manipulated by your ex.

I will be checking my PMs weekly, so you can catch me there. I will not be posting.
Reply
#44

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Love is an abstract concept in itself, especially romantic love before children are involved.

If you really enjoy hanging out with and fucking your ltr there is no problem. If you are thinking about someone else ergo you are not enjoying yourself enough with the new LTR to forget the past.

Let me ask, was the previous girl the one you had the best sex with? having been in a similar situation to the one you describe i would guess the answer is yes.

Make up sex, especially following a breakup, is probably the best kind.

Is the love you describe for this girl heavily linked to the sex, almost like a physical addiction? If this is the case I can only advice you to ride it out dude, Its a cliché but having been there I can tell you time will take care of this. Best of luck.
Reply
#45

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Quote:Quote:

This thread wasn't going in the direction OP was hoping for..... C'mon guys. Let's not derail this thread with extraneous stuff. Carry it to PM.

Yeah the ex and a friend (the friend wants us back together) wanted to meet.

I took yesterday to think about it and after the chat with the RP Uncle and this thread said that it wasn't a good idea.

----

Took my LTR to the gym and banged her out in the restroom after the workout - now she's going to make breakfast.

Problem solved for now.

[Image: highfive.gif]
Reply
#46

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Quote: (05-26-2015 10:31 PM)Aliblahba Wrote:  

The internet is full of cowards and snakes. Jariel is both.

When you've met me personally then your statement will mean something to someone other than yourself.

You and I have never addressed each other in any thread, have never had any type of discussion, so you only put yourself on blast with such a comment.

Good luck with that energy, it's apparent you need it.
Reply
#47

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Start a tribal meet up thread and we'll go from there. Miami?
Reply
#48

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Aliblahba I would love to meet up with some RVF members in Miami this summer if possible. I actually have contacted Jariel last month about me going for business and geting a beer but he did not reply. Jariel why dont we all meet up? Put this crap behind you guys and lets go hunting like our ancestors!! [Image: smile.gif]
Reply
#49

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Quote: (05-26-2015 11:47 PM)Aliblahba Wrote:  

Start a tribal meet up thread and we'll go from there. Miami?

The thing is this, you didn't come into the thread to help out the OP, you came into it to make a disrespectful, personal attack.

If I want to, I'll meet up with guys who I think have game on my level and who I personally respect, I'll never respect a guy who goes out of his way to be blatantly disrespectful towards me, and then acts like he's in a position to make me prove something to him via a meet-up.

If you're ever in Miami, enjoy your stay, besides what you said, isn't grounds for a hospitable meet-up anyway, and that's just man to man.

My inbox is full of messages from guys who are coming to my city who want to know where to go, guys who want game/relationship advice, guys who want information about places they know I've traveled to, etc. and I help out everybody.

So when guys I've never spoken to in any way, shape, or form, come out of the woodwork to make comments like they know me, they think they're affecting the next guy's opinion of me, when they're really only showing the board what type of man they are.
Reply
#50

How Important is it to Love Your LTR?

Quote: (05-26-2015 11:57 PM)Brian Shima Wrote:  

Aliblahba I would love to meet up with some RVF members in Miami this summer if possible. I actually have contacted Jariel last month about me going for business and geting a beer but he did not reply. Jariel why dont we all meet up? Put this crap behind you guys and lets go hunting like our ancestors!! [Image: smile.gif]

Dude, I respect the fact that some of these guys here are older than me, but we're all grown men.

I'm not going to let anybody talk to me any kind of way, and then say, let's go get drinks and chase pussy together.

I'm cool on that.

I respect that we can have differing views on topics, but I don't do the personally disrespectful shit, where people are making comments about your mother, your person, and other shit that they're not really in a position to speak on, then they are just exposing themselves.

A good friend on here informed me that we can block posters, so I've done that, and I won't even see their responses, they're welcome to talk to themselves, because they won't be talking to me.
Reply


Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)