[Private Man]

It's not a subject that RVFers typically talk about. I have no choice. I'm dying from terminal cancer.

Technically, it's Stage 4 Metastatic Liver Cancer. The entire sage is here:

https://theprivateman.wordpress.com/yeah...r-so-what/

The most recent and important update is here:

https://theprivateman.wordpress.com/yeah...ment-37443

Because I have been granted the gift of time regarding my end of life. I'm having a going away party. Ya'll are invited:

https://theprivateman.wordpress.com/2017...way-party/

As of now, I am not experiencing symptoms. That will change, obviously.

OK, with that out of the way. I figure I'd give y'all the opportunity to "Ask the dying guy". Got a question? Go ahead and ask. My fears, my regrets, my plans, what do I expect after death, anything.

I'll offer up the same opportunity for questions on the Red Pill Subreddit.

If this turns out well, I can assemble it for a blog post. As for my blog and Twitter, it's not going away. It's my plan to pass it off to a trusted Manosphere/Red Pill friend who will keep it going but from a new point of view, his own.

Note: I will not consider or even acknowledge alternative therapies. Don't even bring them up. I have made my treatment choices, palliative only, so please SHUT THE FUCK UP about cannabis oil, various diets, "mindset", and a whole bunch of stuff I've already long considered since I was first diagnosed with ocular melanoma back in late 2013. PLEASE RESPECT THIS! I'm the one dealing with this, my body and my choice.

I'll answer as best I can when I can. I'm still working full-time (from home) and the logistics of dying are actually quite involved.

[Going strong]

Respect for your idea, courage and attitude.



Ave, Imperator, moritori te salutan!

[John Michael Kane]

Been a long time since I checked in on your blog. Sorry to hear about the whole ordeal. I guess if there is a silver lining it gives you time to get your affairs in order, whereas many people die when they least expect it.

I'm only 33, but think about my mortality a lot. I want to leave a great legacy for a future wife and children.

I found this creed and printed it out, then posted it on my wall. It isn't specifically about dying, but more so about making the most of what little time God grants us on Earth:

[yankeetravels]

This really hit me hard as someone that lost my uncle very recently to cancer who was like a second father to me. Private Man, I'm really sorry this has happened to you and can't imagine what you must be thinking. But I have to say, you have one of the most interesting mindsets to approach death I have ever witnessed.

There's so many questions I'd want to ask you that I'm not sure if I could fit them all here. Would you be open to some sort of interview? I can't help but think of a Morgan Freeman quote from the movie The Bucket List. "Of the people asked if they would want to know when they're going to die, 96% of people said no. I always leaned towards the other 4%." I think I would lean towards the other 4% myself but I guess my most important question is now that you know, are you glad to know how much time you have to live it up, or would you rather of it been a surprise?

[Mercenary]

I would attend your party if I was living in that part of the world.

What advice would you give to the men here regarding how they lead their lives, so that if the same happens to any of us we do not have any regrets about our choices in life.

This can be in terms of many things like lifestyle, eating, diet, exercise, money, travelling, our jobs, religion, health, chasing girls & getting notches, marriage and children.

I am assuming that being in a position as yours you will have considered all these things.

[King of Monkeys]

I want more hardship in my life because I feel like I'm too soft. My Dad's lived his life and he has plenty of life stories to tell, all the while I've spent my whole life in school (hell, I still am).

What are some challenges in your life you felt made you into a man?

[Private Man]

I'm making notes about the questions asked so I can answer in an appropriate essay.

[BoneDaddy]

(01-31-2017 09:24 PM)Private Man Wrote:  

I'm making notes about the questions asked so I can answer in an appropriate essay.

Godspeed, brother.

We haven't communicated directly here on RVF, but I have checked your blog regularly for updates. You are one inspiration after another.

Your bravery is an example to us all. You have shown us a life well-lived.

My post is trivial compared to your challenge, but I couldn't let this opportunity pass without letting you know how your story has moved me.

Cheers and all the best. Hope we'll all be able to raise a glass on the other side.

Bone

[Enoch]

Private Man:

Has this diagnosis changed your opinion on whether God exists?

[Laner]

Incredible battle Private, I wish you the best on your journey.

Is there anyone who you feel needs you so much, that you are fearful of their life without you?

[tapthatass]

I have no question to ask but I just wanted to share this.

"Were you to live three thousand years, or even thirty thousand, remember that the sole life which a man can lose is that which he is living at the moment...he can have no other life than the one he loses. For the passing minute is every man's equal possession, but what has once gone by is not ours."-Marcus Aurelius

[Elster]

My sincerest sentiments and dutiful admiration for how you are handling this matter,sir.

As for questions,

Do you feel particularly different in your perception about this idea -As in sadder,happy,at peace with the idea and/or more clear in your scale of priorities?

Are you leaving a legacy behind or do you think its worth it? (well there is your blog which you said a fellow friend will take over but I was wondering in general broader terms)

[Kaii]

It takes courage to face one's mortality. I sincerely respect and am humbled by what you are doing and going through.

I know when my dad died, the biggest shock was probably how much the death business costs. Are you prepared financially?

[Private Man]

(02-01-2017 08:07 AM)Kaii Wrote:  

It takes courage to face one's mortality. I sincerely respect and am humbled by what you are doing and going through.

I know when my dad died, the biggest shock was probably how much the death business costs. Are you prepared financially?

I believe so and an excellent question. I'm electing for a basic cremation (pre-paid) and maybe, just maybe, a memorial headstone next to where my mother's family is buried in Earlington, Kentucky. I will NOT be having a memorial service at some overpriced funeral home. That's what the party is for.

There are actually a metric shit load of minor details to attend to right now. Again, the gift of time is being useful here so I can address to such details myself without letting any one get all control freakish with these arrangements. It's all me right now and it's kind of weird to be planning my own death.

Yes, I did consider a viking longboat funeral pyre but damn, getting a permit here in Palm Beach County (Florida) for such a thing is real pain in the ass. (That's a joke, fellas)

[Elster]

If you needed a crowdfunding for a viking funeral I would gladly chip in and spread the word though!

[bacon]

God speed in your remaining time left and I hope your passing will be painless.

I am curious that since you know approximately when you will die and most people do not, what kind of feelings or thoughts does that cause you to have? How does it change the way you look at the problems of people and society?

Have people who you had not had relationships with for years prior or who had not communicated with you in a long time, started to get in contact with you to say goodbye or to reconnect one last time?

Since your time is so precious now, how are you choosing to spend it? What has been the biggest change to your day to day lifestyle?

Thank you for sharing your experience, your contributions on your blog and posts on the forum will be missed when you pass.

[Vaun]

Thank you for the opportunity you're giving us now, to ask you these questions. I am sure this is a very rare experience for all of us, and I think your insights can add true value to men here. You're openness and bravery are noble. I hope to learn from your answers. If I am in So. FLA for your party I am dropping by with all of my Miami Tinder matches, sisters of Kendall exes and whatever day game I can scrounge up from Miami.

I have a few questions;

Does all of this stuff about women and whatnot even matter at all now? Or was it all just fun that we take too seriously?
What does matter to you now?
What would you have changed about life?
What would you have devoted more significant time to in your life? Ex., Learning a language, travel, schooling, game, etc.

[Thomas the Rhymer]

Thank you for sharing your experiences with us.

May you die bravely and happy. We will all join you soon enough.

I would like to know:

What are you most grateful for out of your life?

What brought the most meaning into your life?

Off all the things that happened in your life, what were the most joyful and beautiful?

[Fortis]

Thanks for allowing us to ask you some questions.

I know this is generic, but what has been your biggest regret? I wonder about this sort of thing often.

Is there anything that you wish you could have done differently now that you have a more well-rounded perspective?

How did you broach this topic with your family and relatives?

How do you intend to spend your remaining days?

Is there any advice you'd like to give to the men on this forum regarding living a good life? I think it's quite easy to get caught up in bullshit.

[Snowplow]

Damn man sorry to hear. Its nice to read that you are taking it all in stride. Planning your own arrangements is a manly thing in my book. My Uncle did it, and much to our family's surprise. I definitely believes it helps ease the burden on others.

As for my questions, many have asked very good and deep questions, I wanna keep it light.

Do you plan on banging away until you pass? And what is the funniest/most embarrassing moment of your life?

[samsamsam]

Do you need anything?

Financial support, plane tickets for friends who cannot afford to visit, etc?

[kavi]

Would you consider assisted suicide once the condition became bad enough, if that were availabe? There are some people with cancer who try to live as long a possible, but they have a lot of pain and their quality of life might may be 'too low', this is made possible by modern medicine.

[Private Man]

(02-01-2017 12:31 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

Do you need anything?

Financial support, plane tickets for friends who cannot afford to visit, etc?

Actually, there are a couple of folks I'd like to be able to help with plane tickets... Send me a PM so we coordinate.

Fantastic offer!

[samsamsam]

PM sent

[samsamsam]

Guys, if anyone is interested in donating here is his blog and there is a link to donate on the right hand side.

I hope it is ok to post this. He didn't ask for me to post this. I just think to be compassionate to a man who is dying is an important thing among men.

https://theprivateman.wordpress.com/