Quote:Quote:
My In-Laws are rich. I think their house is worth a couple million USD. They support probably 2/3rds of my wifes entire family maybe 40 people... and she is an only child.
My wife is an important status symbol to them. They love to show her around with me. If she gets fat, people talk and it reflects badly on them. If I'm a fuck-up it can be forgiven because I'm not blood. The positives for me is that I'm high status and decent looking. They like that a lot, but it seems to create a lot of jealousy from other parts of her family. I'm not going to lie... it's a crazy dynamic. My wife is completely paranoid that one of her cousins is going to try to bang me. I'm not going to fall for that crap though... I keep my shit on the way down low. Wink
My experience on the difference between Chinese and Vietnamese girls is that the girls from China tend to do this cute pouty temper tantrum thing. Have you ever experienced that?
I'll add a few of my own experiences in dealing with Vietnamese-Americans and talking with many Vietnamese girls online. Getting even slightly fat is considered shameful. I'm friends with on Viet girl with an American boyfriend. She asked me for advice on her weight. She's 105 lbs and 5'3", otherwise known as a healthy weight. She's very fearful that her boyfriend is lying to her about her "fatness" to make her feel better, but that he doesn't want to hurt her feelings. Many Vietnamese girls are right around the 90-100 lbs mark, they are very petite. Because of that, if a girl is still in the "normal" range of weight, she can feel extreme pressure to be slender.
It is the complete opposite of living in the West where in the Unted States, the average woman now weighs in excess of 160 lbs! Vietnamese families will tell their daughters to look fit and healthy. Even poorer and middle-class girls put a lot of effort into going to the spa and salon to look good for their man. They don't look sloppy and if you also look sharp, they'll appreciate it. I find it a better dynamic than the USA, where a lot of the time it is a race to the bottom of sloppy dress and lack of physical fitness.
As for the jealous/worrying about banging a cousin/sister/female friend, etc. that is EXTREMELY common with Vietnamese girls. In fact, of the many that I have talked to for any length of time ALMOST ALL of them have asked if I'm talking to other girls, if I'm loyal to them, if I like them, if I love them, if I will ever cheat, etc. It is really hard to put to words just how much these girls EXPECT LOYALTY. Personally, that's a huge bonus for me, because I don't mind being in a committed relationship. The only challenge that presents is in the dating stage when you're still trying to decide which girl to choose from if you have multiple leads, like I do.
I'm rather forthcoming that I don't believe in online relationships, but that once I get a chance to travel to Vietnam, we can meet and person and progress from there. They have a "lock it down" mentality with what they perceive to be a man of value. It is very flattering, but I just want to make sure I'm getting the real deal instead of promising to commitment to some girl I've never met in person. They may not be the happiest with me making them wait, but better that than completely discarding all wife prospects if a single girl you committed to turned out to be a "dud".
Just this last week one girl who really likes me mentioned that she and her coworker were having lunch together. I said "cool, what's her name"? She replied with a bunch of sad faces and didn't want me to know her name. I asked her why. She said that she was affraid that her female coworker would steal me because (in her words) "I'm a catch". If you love girls that are protective of you, even jealous or a bit needy, Vietnamese women seem to have this trait without fail. I've yet to meet a really aloof one.
Zerdame, had some interesting points here:
thread-13604...pid1650657
Takeaway quote:
Quote:Quote:
These girls are fierce lovers. My girl straight up told me she was "territorial" lol.
That's pretty much them in a nutshell!
Quote:Quote:
My experience on the difference between Chinese and Vietnamese girls is that the girls from China tend to do this cute pouty temper tantrum thing. Have you ever experienced that?
I had a girlfriend who lived in the United States that was from mainland China. She was pouty sometimes when she wanted me to buy her something, but that I told her gifts are for when someone feels like getting someone something without pressure, or it isn't a gift. I curbed that right in the bud from the get go. She stopped it really quickly. Previously, she had a rich Chinese dude that bought her everything but was emotionally checked out.
She stuck around with me for 7 months, but was forced to call it quits when her parents kept trying to force her into an arranged marriage with some other rich Chinese dude. Basically, if you date upper-class Chinese girls, they will expect you to buy them stuff, your parents won't want you dating her (unless you are a rich Chinese dude) and the relationship probably won't end in marriage. That's my sample size of one reporting. Take of that what you may.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Bangladesh Datasheet by geowork
On a related note for wife searching, Geowork just posted a detailed datasheet on Bangladesh, which he considers a possible wife searching spot for a traditional girl. I'm posting it here for those men who are interested in the locatino as a wife search spot. His original thread and follow-up posts can be found in the link below:
thread-65156.html
Quote: (10-07-2017 03:33 PM)gework Wrote:
Airport
Move with purpose, don't for a second show that you are not sure what you are doing as you will quickly be swooned by an airport worker who will want to provide you help for two days wages in tips.
On arrival at the airport, if you don't have a visa and are collecting a visa on arrival, there is a counter where you will find people filling out forms. Go to the counter and take an immigration form. Fill it in, take it to the small office behind the immigration counter, here you will pay 4500 taka, the local currency, which is about $55. You can also pay in dollars. There is not an ATM that side of immigration control, but I was allowed temporarily to the ATM to get money. They will give you a receipt of payment. Take that and your immigration form to the immigration counter. Once they have given you your visa, if I remember correctly, you can circumnavigate the ensuing immigration control. If you have your visa already, go straight to the immigration control. Once out of immigration control there is an ATM and to the left you will find a stand for the telecoms company, Grameephone, who are generally recommended. A SIM with 10GB and about 150 taka (300 SMS and about 50 minutes of calls) costs 1500 taka ($18). To leave the airport the best way is Uber. Use their Premier option to avoid being carted off in a shitbox. It's very cheap anyway. The base fare is $1 and then $0.25 per KM. There are taxis you can get from the airport, but may rip you.
On departure get your transport to drop you at the first part of the entrance to the airport. Walk until you find the entrance that says “Foreigners and Business Passengers”. Wait in the queue, though I was waved past everyone else (white privilege). Then wait at the actual entrance until you are waved in. To the left there is a detector for your luggage and metal detector. In the middle of the lobby there is a single small screen in Bangla and English that lists the flights and which desk you need to go to check-in. After check-in look for a circular desk with lots of people filling in forms. Take a form and ideally bring your own pen or you will be seized on by someone trying to make phat tips fill it in for you. Once filled in go through immigration control. In the next lobby there is a screen telling you which gate you need to go to.
Accommodation
I always go with AirBnB, so don't know what hotels might offer. The main reason you might want to go with AirBnB is to get a washer as there are not many washing services and they are slow. Go in the areas known as Gulshan-1 and Gulshan-2 – the finger of land here.
This area is heavily under armed guard and is where most foreigners live. You could also try the area known as Banani, which if to the left of Gulshan. It also has foreigners, but no armed guards/police.
If staying in Gulshan, which is the most expensive area in the city, stay away from the main road, which is very noisy. It would be good to stay near Gulshan Lake Park, as this is one of the few areas you can meet / open spaces in this packed city. You can get your own place with pool and gym for less than $600/month.
The City: Dhaka
The best and the worst you can make it look
Gulshan is fairly well developed and relatively clean, but where you may have a beautiful baroque- or colonial-style building on one side of the road, there may be a tropical-stained murky building on the other, open drainage troughs, crazy wiring, armless and hunchback boys hustling you for your cash… The illogical and uncooperative culture is particularly evident on the roads, which are typically rolling or at a stand still. People honk their horns for no reason, overtake with no care, people go out into the road an expect all traffic to stop and the rickshaw do whatever they want – going the wrong way up a road at night or doing a U-turn in a sixteen lane inter-junction regardless of oncoming traffic. However it does have a certain amount of charm and curiosity.
You can barely walk anywhere in Gulshan without seeing armed/guards or police who carry hefty sub-machine guns and rifles. Some shops have metal detectors and parks are under armed guard. I regularly walked out into the city on my own and didn't seem to draw much attention, even though the only obvious foreigner I ever saw on the streets was a hulking black-man who gust into a shanty convince store for a bottle of water. Walking around will caused you to be hounded by street children, beggars and rickshaw drivers. You will however draw copious amounts of attraction if you walk around with a local girl or girl(s).
There really isn't a whole lot to do entertainment-wise. The locals' lives consist of hanging out at relatives houses; and if they have money going to a lounge (alcohol-free bar) or restaurant. The city is also not friendly for meeting people. There don't appear to be any benches and very few open spaces that aren't full of young boys playing cricket.
Venturing out of the general Gulshan area was not recommended and you will be a screaming target for any criminals. I didn't have any problem, but I was always with someone else.
Food
There are lots of restaurants with cuisine from all over the world. From a simple fast food joint you can get a meal from about $3 and a better restaurant from about $7-10. You can also get food delivered from most of these restaurants by FoodPanda or the local clone, HungryNaki. Delivery is about $0.80. For food, I would recommend getting it delivered via the sites Chaldal or MeenaClick. They are a bit flaky: Chaldal for not sending items and not removing them from the bill and MeenaClick for being slow. Order in the morning or night before for delivery at night for best results. Delivery is free or negligible.
Transport
The cheapest way to get around is rickshaw, whose market price seems to be about 10-15 taka per kilometer. Most can't speak English or very little, so the best way to deal with them is just give them something based on the above. Rickshaws are everywhere and are easily hailed if they don't try and hail you. This is the best way to get around if traveling a short distance.
There are also CNGs (auto-rickshaws), which are a bit more expensive.
For longer distances use Uber; and try and have some good change as they often don't or at least say they don't.
Avoid using busses, which typically look like they've been attacked for a few months with a toffee hammer before being driven along a wall and maybe with the windshields and lights smashes out.
The traffic is slow and it will take you about 3-5 hours to cross the city.
Night Life
There are not many places that serve alcohol or offer what you would think of as night life, but you have the following:
Raddisson Hotel: This is less than 1 mile from the airport.
Westin: In Gulshan.
La Diplomat: No women.
American Recreation Club: Likely to be 100% foreign and has an admission fee. There are also lots of clubs for various other major nations like the UK and The Netherlands, if you should find the need to fall back on Western talent.
The Girls (middle class) have a lot of good qualities. There is not much of a future for a woman in Bangladesh if she doesn't marry. So the notion of a ONS is not really known. However, the middle class seem to be highly Westernised in many ways. The society is moving away from arranged marriages to boyfriend-girlfriend and “love marriage”. As long as a girl is not wearing some sort of yashmak, she's probably going to have sex with her boy friend.
One one the right is very typical of girls putting in effort
In the case of the [90% majority] of Muslims (if we are talking about the middle class), adherence is low. Most aren't praying or going to the mosque and it's the same sort of lines you will get from nominal Christians who are keen to make out their attachment to the religion, but really aren't. Most boys seem they would be happier with a fresh-pressed Ben Sherman and enough bandwidth to squeeze a video down from TitAndBumTube.net; and girls are more interested in the latest Taylor Swift and being swooped away by a galant gent. In relation to talking about Islam, they are quick to distance themselves from virtually any other Muslim country and say things such as “We are not pure Muslim” or “We're not full Muslims”. Indeed, if you looked around you would think you are in the majority-Hindu state, West Bengal in India. As beyond a few older blokes doddling about in their bin Laden-ware, most young guys are shaved, in shirts and trousers and most girls wear varying degrees of tightness variants of the Bengali dress, the Saree. Informing my girl that I thought that Islam was one of the worst things in the world didn't stop her from telling me I need to put it in her the second time I met her.
On the mental front girls are very sweet, feminine and dreamy. They are very soft, want to hug and spend all day with you. You'll also probably find they desire to cook and clean for you and be more of a traditional wife. This goes beyond what I've witnesses or read about in other areas where women are very feminine. Like others in South Asia, they long for a good husband who will be faithful and kind. But unlike the likes of Pinoy and Thai who will say this and then choose the bad boy, Bengali girls are not likely to do that. The culture doesn't really allow them to and the consequences of choosing bad man are well known to them. This doesn't in any way mean they will be good wives as their stimuli prompts them to be like this. Girls are forthright in saying they want the above quality and say they are the most important, but really they are not as these middle-class girls aren't prepared to trade down socio-economically. But they are strong desires. You will see plenty of men with women you would generally consider way out of their league. They are however very interested in marrying foreign men, as like SEA women they have made the assumption from watching TV, films and listening to music that men in The West treat women a lot better than their men. This was displayed to me multiple times, even by men.
As with other darker countries (Bengali can be very dark) there is a desire for lighter women. Women who try and make themselves attractive will make themselves so white they could pass as South European and even North European. They won't openly admit why they do this – they will say skin colour is not important, but indirectly you can tell they fetishise light skin and green/blue eyes. The more attractive girls will often wear green contact lenses.
For them, getting into relationships revolves a lot around their family. Most people live with their family, if not 1st degree, then cousins. And spend most of their time with family. Most of their friends are their cousins. So a girl will typically meet a boy via the family circle.
The difference of age between men and women at marriage is one of the highest in the world, at almost eight years difference. Girls are on the market at 18, while boys are expected to show their worst and enter the market around 26-27.
On the physical front, a good number of young girls are in decent shape and can hold their own against girls from others countries. They can come across very dainty, feminine, agreeable, with a hint of mystery. But this declines rapidly. I didn't see any MILFs and the lipids quickly start piling on. The idea of going to the gym as the religion it has become in The West is quite new.
As above, they like to make themselves look white and even manage to pull this off with their limbs. I don't think there are any girls in the country who could really be mistaken for European without makeup.
Not many girls wear Western-style clothing, but many younger girls wear modernised Sarees, which can look quite striking.
Attractive, young dancing Hindu Bengalis
Diseases and Weather
Bangladesh is part of the belt of South Asian countries with high rates of serious diseases. Dhaka has more mosquitoes than any other city I have been to, so precaution should be taken, like not opening windows.
Make sure you get a place with AC, as the weather is the most oppressive I have ever witnessed. I've been to many hot places and they were never anything other than hot, but the level of water in the air in Bangladesh is shocking. It makes a lot of people ill, particularly low blood pressure.
Meeting
There are two options that seem best: 1) go to the spots I mentioned above; or 2) pipeline. I saw there are some Bangladeshi profile on online dating/marriages sites, but the route I took was just looking for Westernised-looking girls on Facebook and adding them. Beyond that I don't know if you'd have too much luck with approaching. You might be able to in an lounge or restaurant or similar venue, but only if they are not with older relatives. It's pretty common for boys to flat out ask girls to either be their girlfriend or marry them. Some boys will ask to marry a girl after talking to her for an hour. But this is done from the context of social circles.
It's quite easy to get talking to some local, young men, who may be a good way to insert yourself into a social circle.
On the streets, you'll find very few women other than between about 5 and 9 PM.
Places to Go
Old Town
Cox's Bazzar: This is the longest beach in the world, accessible by a 1 hour flight from Dhaka. Book this via Biman Air. A return flight is about $90.
You can get a boat to St Martin's Island for about $6 (return), which has the best beaches in Bangladesh:
Verdict
Middle-class+ typical marriage dress
If you are looking for an uber-feminine, traditional wife, Bangladesh is a hidden gem. My concerns would be you are going to lower the SMV of your male spawn in the global marketplace and the preponderancy to put on weight. Though I think it highly likely you could get her to maintain an exercise regime as they value keeping you happy.
As a bang destination it's probably going to be tough, but I'd be interested to hear from anyone who tried their luck in the two hotels/night clubs above.