[joker]

Hey guys I'm just writing a final close on this, more so to vent and get it out of my system. I never ended up meeting her on the wednesday instead I made the mistake of calling her that night but I didnt make an effort to get back with her I just let her have it saying shit like "you can go back to that dickhead" and she blew up over this and got defensive. A long late night text was sent by her saying she was wrongly accused of "false and disgusting accusations" and that she loved and cared about me but she regrets being in a relationship with someone who doesn't trust her and thinks nothing of her. So the next day I pack up all of the things she gave me put them in a plastic bag drove down to her work and handed them to her saying "I don't want my stuff back, see you". I was deleted off her facebook and assuming phone as well and that was it we haven't spoken since. What I want to know is why is she being this cold, I understand that if she did love me she would move mountains by calling me and trying to patch things up but this cut the cord stuff really sucks. I hope its not like this for future relationships

[Dr. Howard]

(11-08-2014 07:40 AM)joker Wrote:  

Hey guys I'm just writing a final close on this, more so to vent and get it out of my system. I never ended up meeting her on the wednesday instead I made the mistake of calling her that night but I didnt make an effort to get back with her I just let her have it saying shit like "you can go back to that dickhead" and she blew up over this and got defensive. A long late night text was sent by her saying she was wrongly accused of "false and disgusting accusations" and that she loved and cared about me but she regrets being in a relationship with someone who doesn't trust her and thinks nothing of her. So the next day I pack up all of the things she gave me put them in a plastic bag drove down to her work and handed them to her saying "I don't want my stuff back, see you". I was deleted off her facebook and assuming phone as well and that was it we haven't spoken since. What I want to know is why is she being this cold, I understand that if she did love me she would move mountains by calling me and trying to patch things up but this cut the cord stuff really sucks. I hope its not like this for future relationships

Dude, learn this lesson now before you are older or married or have kids. Women are fluid, their perspective on the past and future is determined by their current state of mind. Both of your statements are true

1. While you were together and she was into it, she probably did love you and would move mountains.

----that switch is now overwritten by another dude or her ego

2. You are now an outsider, persona non-grata and she will treat you no better and perhaps worse than a stranger she sees on the street.

There is no gradual switch with women, for better or worse. They are not like men where past deeds carry weight or respect. They are either into you or not.

In the future, pay attention to how a new girl treats strangers and those she dislikes. That will be the treatment you receive if you break up or divorce after 3 months or 30 years of being together.

Conversely, this also works in your favor that if you treat a girl poorly or cheat on her, giving her some sort of romantic treatment will overwrite your transgressions.

Keep on moving ahead with this breakup and radio silence. Fill your life up with hobbies, the gym, work and strange pussy (dumpster dive if you must) until you've got enough time away from the relationship to reflect on it from a more objective position. 8mos to 1 year.

[boinerd]

[enderilluminatus]

Someone tell Hov what his shirt means.

[HBG]

girls contacting alpha dbag exes? grounds for immediate termination.

[kaotic]

(11-08-2014 07:40 AM)joker Wrote:  

Hey guys I'm just writing a final close on this, more so to vent and get it out of my system. I never ended up meeting her on the wednesday instead I made the mistake of calling her that night but I didnt make an effort to get back with her I just let her have it saying shit like "you can go back to that dickhead" and she blew up over this and got defensive. A long late night text was sent by her saying she was wrongly accused of "false and disgusting accusations" and that she loved and cared about me but she regrets being in a relationship with someone who doesn't trust her and thinks nothing of her. So the next day I pack up all of the things she gave me put them in a plastic bag drove down to her work and handed them to her saying "I don't want my stuff back, see you". I was deleted off her facebook and assuming phone as well and that was it we haven't spoken since. What I want to know is why is she being this cold, I understand that if she did love me she would move mountains by calling me and trying to patch things up but this cut the cord stuff really sucks. I hope its not like this for future relationships

Dude, DO-NOT-CONTACT-THAT-HOE !!

You burned that bridge by going off on her on the phone, good you vented, you pissed her off.

OF COURSE you're going to be deleted off her FB (why didn't you delete her first?)

No contact rule is in effect.

You want to know why she's being this cold ?

Because you went off on her, and gave her stuff back to her, aka closure aka you're done.

OF COURSE she's writing you off.

You crossed her river and burned the boat, there is NO going back.


Joker you gotta understand, you inadvertently did the best thing possible by having her cut you off so you have no contact with her.

This is NOT how relationships work, she's NOT good for you.

There are TONS of girls out there that are way better than her, who don't talk to their ex's and go to a concert with them and lie about it.

She cut the cord that was clouding your brain, you're free of it now and can see clearly, this should be a breath of fresh air for you.

Remember, don't contact her anymore, you need to move on, game other girls.

[fmman]

(11-08-2014 06:53 PM)kaotic Wrote:  

[quote='joker' pid='873710' dateline='1415450400']

Joker you gotta understand, you inadvertently did the best thing possible by having her cut you off so you have no contact with her.

This is NOT how relationships work, she's NOT good for you.

There are TONS of girls out there that are way better than her, who don't talk to their ex's and go to a concert with them and lie about it.

She cut the cord that was clouding your brain, you're free of it now and can see clearly, this should be a breath of fresh air for you.

Remember, don't contact her anymore, you need to move on, game other girls.

Good advice. I've read all this thread. A lot of you guys are quite hard on Joker, yeah I guess he needs it. I want to wish you Joker all the best and keep us all updated how its all going. I have been through similar.

[joker]

On an unrelated note we won tonight at indoor against the team that has the chick that shoved me. Again she was smashing into me but hey it was a good bit of fun. Im pretty sure the manboobed guy I shoved in indoor was her boyfriend thats why shes been acting so hostile. My next will be trying to find a job part time while I'm at uni and we'll see how it goes from there pimps

[OGNorCal707]

(11-08-2014 08:48 AM)Dr. Howard Wrote:  

Dude, learn this lesson now before you are older or married or have kids. Women are fluid, their perspective on the past and future is determined by their current state of mind. Both of your statements are true

1. While you were together and she was into it, she probably did love you and would move mountains.

----that switch is now overwritten by another dude or her ego

2. You are now an outsider, persona non-grata and she will treat you no better and perhaps worse than a stranger she sees on the street.

There is no gradual switch with women, for better or worse. They are not like men where past deeds carry weight or respect. They are either into you or not.

In the future, pay attention to how a new girl treats strangers and those she dislikes. That will be the treatment you receive if you break up or divorce after 3 months or 30 years of being together.

Conversely, this also works in your favor that if you treat a girl poorly or cheat on her, giving her some sort of romantic treatment will overwrite your transgressions.

Keep on moving ahead with this breakup and radio silence. Fill your life up with hobbies, the gym, work and strange pussy (dumpster dive if you must) until you've got enough time away from the relationship to reflect on it from a more objective position. 8mos to 1 year.

Damn I missed this post a couple days ago, but thanks a lot for sharing this, what you wrote almost seemed like it was completely directed to me, as this is something I've been dealing with recently.

As I wrote about in a recent thread a long term girlfriend of mine dumped me, and she seemed so into me and I was so good to her, the rationale side of my brain can't understand how the switch was so immediate, and how after she dumped me, how she could be so distant, cold, and disrespectful.

I guess it's true that women don't really have the same sense of honor and respect that men do, to me I can't comprehend how and why someone can just completely change how they think and feel for someone in a sudden moment, especially after so much time and experience together.

Now I am really starting to understand the metaphor of the female lizard brain and how they are just reptilian in general, they can be slithery and slimy with their behavior and shady ways, they are cold blooded like reptiles, and they lack true intelligence and only deal with how they feel in the moment.

[joker]

Here's an update on my situation since breaking up 5 months ago. I admit this to be a rant so for those not interested stop reading now. Ive started working out for a solid 2 months now and am looking and feeling much better but i just need to fix up my diet a bit. Im still unemployed since losing my job a week after breaking up, because i rolled my ankle and was considered too much of a liability. I am however back at uni which is gauging my interest for the moment but i hope getting a job part time will help keep me motivated and budy. Things are starting to look up but ive had no success with women not even a makeout but that could be die to my financial stint (i cant afford one uni textbook atm). Never heard from my ex at all which makes things a little hard at times. I'll soon apply for part time security work and then things will pick up after cash starts coming in. Feel free to comment

[samsamsam]

(03-01-2015 09:24 AM)joker Wrote:  

Here's an update on my situation since breaking up 5 months ago. I admit this to be a rant so for those not interested stop reading now. Ive started working out for a solid 2 months now and am looking and feeling much better but i just need to fix up my diet a bit. Im still unemployed since losing my job a week after breaking up, because i rolled my ankle and was considered too much of a liability. I am however back at uni which is gauging my interest for the moment but i hope getting a job part time will help keep me motivated and budy. Things are starting to look up but ive had no success with women not even a makeout but that could be die to my financial stint (i cant afford one uni textbook atm). Never heard from my ex at all which makes things a little hard at times. I'll soon apply for part time security work and then things will pick up after cash starts coming in. Feel free to comment

Hang in there. Keep focusing on the short term immediate goals to stabilise your situation. Just remember it is a journey. It might not be fun right now but a couple miles down the road the scenery may be totally different and prettier to look at.

[Lizard King]

(03-01-2015 09:24 AM)joker Wrote:  

Never heard from my ex at all which makes things a little hard at times.

I hope you don't have Oneitis.

It can happen to any of us early in the game. It will hold you back, both in life, and in your relationships.

Best way to eliminate it is to get out there and meet new girls, and get new notches.

[-g-]

deleted, didn't see the thread was old

[CJ_W]

So I saw this: "Girlfirend went kanye west concert with Ex ADVICE"

The answer is this: Do not contact her ever again, if you live with her (which you should never do) take all of her stuff and move it outside, change your locks and contemplate moving to another apartment somewhere more central in whatever city you live in(I would do this immediately). Your relationship is over. I didn't even read your posts as I didn't have to, that one sentence in the title is enough.


It seems like you're not taking the advice other posters are giving you though which is the above.

So, here's so better advice that corresponds directly to you:

Don't dump her, just act like everything is ok, and if you like, get married to her, have a kid with her and see where your life goes. I already know the answer to all of this but you don't, and you seem to be the type of person that has to experience all of this before you learn. So I say, go and learn the lessons you need to, when you're done, come back to the forum and get your life back together.


Good luck.


Edit: FUCK! That necro tho! ok well good op you're doing fine then. I wont be deleting this though as some other guy will find this useful.

[barnbarn2k]

@Joker the reason why she hasnt contacted you is breaking up with her you caused her to look bad in her friend circle. That should have really pissed her off. Everyone in her circle and her family is like why arent you with so and so, and every time someone asks she has to explain it and re-live the truth. Sure she made some version of events up, and she might even believe them, but she still knows its her fault. Basically you called her bluff. She told all her friends and family that it is you're fault so in effect she cant go back to you because that would make her look worse.

2 years with one chick is a long time. your brain has been programmed for her. It takes a lot of time and work to undo that. The same thing happens to most people, except most people dont do anything about it, get the chick pregnant and marry her, then get divorce raped and pay up their ass in child support for 26 years only to find out the kid isnt theirs and blah blah. You got out of that rut while you can still enjoy your youth.