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Are You In Wife Hunting Mode?
12-05-2018, 08:36 AM
Quote: (12-05-2018 08:24 AM)EndsExpect Wrote:
Quote: (12-02-2018 03:16 PM)sharksfanguy88 Wrote:
"I'm in wife hunt mode now, because I don't want to be stressed out about it and rush it later". He pointed out to me that he very likely would want to date a girl at least 1-2 years before proposing - so if he meets his future wife today, he's married at 36. If he meets her in 2 years, he's 38. He argued that it's the single biggest, most important decision of your life. It's picking the person that you wake up next to for 40-100 years, it's picking the mother of your future children. Dudes spend decades on their careers and their bodies and their bank accounts - why is it so insane to think that finding the woman you'll be with forever might be worthy of a multiple year investment?
- Are you in wife hunting mode?
- Does your game change at all while in wife hunting mode? Do you approach less or more? Do you cut women off more frequently after the first day / first week / first month?
- Have you taken bigger and bigger steps to making this wife hunt mode investment? (changing cities, more gym time, new job, going out more etc.)
Would love your thoughts.
So, I'm on the other side of this. I did a damn good job. I have a good feminine loyal wife, a great kid, and working on a second. Been married over 5 years, and survived stuff that ends most marriages.
What I can tell you is that you are over romanticizing marriage. You should stop that because it will fuck you up down the road.
Women think love is a feeling, and that when you stop feeling the love then you... "love someone but are not IN LOVE". This is what stupid people think love is. All emotions are ephemeral by nature. Love is a choice you make. You have to wake up every fucking day and say... "I choose to love this woman". Pick a woman that makes this choice easier and you will have a good life. If you pick a woman that also understands that love isn't some feeling that comes and goes... that its a choice she makes and that sometimes you are going to make it a hard choice... then you will do fine.
Awesome post.
When you're pulling hair out of the drain, unclogging the toilet, and cleaning her dishes, yeah, it's a challenge. I have tripped over more fucking shoes ...
"Love" is a lot of reality and it ain't always pretty.
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12-05-2018, 09:47 AM
The big marriage conundrum is what happens when she hits the wall. You're going to want young pussy, and a working open marriage is like a unicorn.
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12-05-2018, 11:45 AM
Quote: (12-05-2018 09:47 AM)The Stronger Sex Wrote:
The big marriage conundrum is what happens when she hits the wall. You're going to want young pussy, and a working open marriage is like a unicorn.
Eh, the bigger conundrum is this ...
Do you want a 40 year old woman raising your kids? They are physically challenging.
If you don't want kids, you can just have a girlfriend. Several, actually.
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12-05-2018, 11:53 AM
Quote: (12-05-2018 11:45 AM)HankMoody Wrote:
Quote: (12-05-2018 09:47 AM)The Stronger Sex Wrote:
The big marriage conundrum is what happens when she hits the wall. You're going to want young pussy, and a working open marriage is like a unicorn.
Eh, the bigger conundrum is this ...
Do you want a 40 year old woman raising your kids? They are physically challenging.
If you don't want kids, you can just have a girlfriend. Several, actually.
Depends on your age vs. hers. If you're in your 30s and you marry a girl 10 years younger, you are doing well in that a young woman will raise your kids. Problem is you will be 'old dad', there is a separate thread exploring all the pitfalls of this. But at least old dad has young reasonably tight wife, not a wife who hit the wall hard, then had 2 kids after that!
“Where the danger is, so grows the saving element.” ~ German poet Hoelderlin
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12-05-2018, 02:32 PM
have no sympathy for dudes like this when they get divorced and end up living in their mothers basement when she takes all his shit and assets.
1-2 years and proposing. why even propose why not just be together for 3 years without the offical marriage title. marriage is the thing of the past when their was not things like alimony and child support back in the 1700s...
1 year and you will propose to a girl... lol
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12-05-2018, 05:39 PM
Quote: (12-04-2018 09:43 PM)zoom Wrote:
For me personally I'm looking to marry a debt-free, non-tatooed, virgin.
I think you definitely have to hunt for those since they are a rare breed. They don't just come out of nowhere.
Edit: Let me clarify a bit. By being in active wife hunting mode you should be trying make connections with traditional families and getting involved with your church. If you make the right connections then you could get a semi-arranged marriage.
Sounds like I have to start going to a church. Have you ever met a virgin who is looking to stay that way until she meets the right guy though? I haven't. I have come across a few virgins but they've all been looking to get rid of it asap via Tinder etc.
Females are all NPC's by nature so if she's so totally against the societal norms that she's straight out of the 1930's and want to save herself for marriage, then there must be something wrong about her. As in some kind of mental defect. Or she's in some kind of cult. Unfortunately. Thoughts?
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12-05-2018, 05:44 PM
Quote: (12-05-2018 02:32 PM)TravelingBodybuilder Wrote:
have no sympathy for dudes like this when they get divorced and end up living in their mothers basement when she takes all his shit and assets.
1-2 years and proposing. why even propose why not just be together for 3 years without the offical marriage title. marriage is the thing of the past when their was not things like alimony and child support back in the 1700s...
1 year and you will propose to a girl... lol
There's a thing called prenup to take care of those issues.
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12-05-2018, 05:47 PM
Quote: (12-05-2018 09:47 AM)The Stronger Sex Wrote:
The big marriage conundrum is what happens when she hits the wall. You're going to want young pussy, and a working open marriage is like a unicorn.
I don't plan to stay faithful to my wife. Maybe for the first couple of years. But sooner or later you will get tired of that same old pussy, and you need something new. The only reason I'm getting married is to create a positive environment for my future children.
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12-05-2018, 05:50 PM
Quote: (12-05-2018 08:36 AM)HankMoody Wrote:
Awesome post.
When you're pulling hair out of the drain, unclogging the toilet, and cleaning her dishes, yeah, it's a challenge. I have tripped over more fucking shoes ...
"Love" is a lot of reality and it ain't always pretty.
Why would you clean her dishes? Who's the wife, you or her?
Also don't understand the bit about her leaving shoes on the floor that you will trip over. If she's a slob you have to set boundaries and teach her how to behave. I have had girls stay with me for long periods of time but I have never found hair in the bathroom, tripped over shoes or done dishes.
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12-05-2018, 06:01 PM
Quote: (12-05-2018 08:24 AM)EndsExpect Wrote:
Women think love is a feeling, and that when you stop feeling the love then you... "love someone but are not IN LOVE". This is what stupid people think love is. All emotions are ephemeral by nature. Love is a choice you make. You have to wake up every fucking day and say... "I choose to love this woman". Pick a woman that makes this choice easier and you will have a good life. If you pick a woman that also understands that love isn't some feeling that comes and goes... that its a choice she makes and that sometimes you are going to make it a hard choice... then you will do fine.
The question you could ask yourself otherwise is: Do you really need to love your wife? If you say yes, then you are marrying for love. I don't think that's very smart. Marriage is supposed to be a business arrangement. That's the way it has always been, up until very recently. Marrying for love is a concept that does not work.
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12-06-2018, 05:38 AM
Not looking for one but I do put women through a wife material filter. That being said almost no women are wife material when I get to know them (they've had a lot of premartial sex, no cooking skills, not submissive enough, unable to make time to see me, only focused on making money, obsession with traveling which is code for hookup with foreign Chads, et cetera).
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12-06-2018, 04:16 PM
I always thought I am. I engaged to my ex, shortly before my 25th birthday. It turned out to be bad decision. Not because I´ve chosen bad girl, she was actually very suitable girl to marry and have kids with. But I was too young for that and it ended by my mistake. I didn´t appreciate the quality she provided me with.
But it led me to kind of freedom. I am not saying I will never propose any girl ever, but if it hadn´t worked out with this one, it won´t work out with another at this period of my life.
The mode I am in right now can be desribed by one article written by Roosh, when I discovered red pill two and half years ago. He speaks about some kind of algorythm, that I am following right now:
1. Work on yourself and enjoy results (in connection with girls we can say bang them)
2. If you meet some high quality girl, marry her and have kids
3. If it doesn´t work out, repeat number 1.
In my case I did number 1, then 2 almost married and almost had kids. It hadnt work out, so I am back and number 1. Only banging more girls.
"Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in the service of your people."
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12-08-2018, 02:51 PM
Quote: (12-07-2018 03:07 AM)StrikeBack Wrote:
Yes I have met several and I married one. None of them I met through a church and none of them was "semi-arranged".
Where/how? And what year was this?
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12-08-2018, 06:06 PM
Between 2009 and 2015 (2015 was my now wife).
Where:
- Charity functions
- Social dance balls (esp student ones)
- Farmer's markets
- Arts markets
- Live music venues (especially the ones on weekend afternoons)