[HankMoody]

A pocketbook is a thing women carry to tote their stuff around.

I guess you could also call it a purse.

[yankeetravels]

This is a tough question. I'd lean towards no just because I think I'm too young for that kind of commitment at the moment (mid-20's). But, I tend to think the same way as Final Epic in believing that if you're set on searching for a wife, you will force it. I would rather believe in being open to having a wife if the right girl came along. So, I think that's where I'm at with a recent realization to have more quality women in my life. With that said, I am definitely judging women I am pursuing from the second I interact with them if they have the potential to be a suitable mate. I have had less than a handful go into the LTR category.

My problem is that the US marriage laws are not on my side and I'm not sure if I'd be ready to settle in any one country abroad anytime soon with a whole world to see. An ideal scenario for me if I had a bit deeper of pockets would be for a girl to be open to traveling with me for a few months anyway. I've had a girl that straight up wanted my babies once and begged me to cum the first time we did it. Luckily, I had better discipline lol.

Like the OP's friend, I would also want to be dating a girl for a few years before I married her. Doing the same thing every single day doesn't strongly appeal to me though. I think I've been more of a STR guy up to this point. I like the idea of having a stable girl to be with for a while, but I think eventually I always end up either wanting a new adventure, think about how many things I would miss out on if I locked a chick down, and also sometimes it just runs its course. The longest LTRs I've been in are two separate six-month ones, so I'm interested to see how my mindset would be when I date a chick for a year or two.

Realistically, I think I have about a 10-15 year window to find a wife if I ever want one. It's going to take me a while to decide what exactly I'm going to do. I met one girl in my past that I thought would make a great mother to potential children. I was pretty anti-kids back in those days and told her that. She kind of bulled through it and worked on trying to open my mind to it. It half worked, because I don't look at LTR women the same way anymore.

For wife hunting mode, I look for a woman that could make a good mother if I wanted kids, a woman with a traditional mindset, and one that is more humble and laid back. I also think having a good sex drive and sexual chemistry is important, because something I would not want to happen would be for a marriage to become sexless once the knot is tied and the first child is born.

But, if I don't think a girl is LTR material, it doesn't mean I won't fuck them .

[Poseidon]

I am in passive hunting mode.
So while I'm not out there with a rifle shooting frantically for a wife, I have traps set out in the wild. One day I will wake up and realize the right one has stepped into it.

I've been banging all kinds of girls consistently since I was 13 - 14 (now 32) and been in some LTRs.
Banging sluts all over the place in hollow interactions is really cool, until it is not.

[Graft]

Pretty much.

I'm 27 now, at the peak of my looks game, somewhat towards the peak of my financial game.

I highly doubt that I'll be able to pull a young wife in 10, maybe even five years time. I'm going to have to find her within the next five years in the US, or I will have to go abroad where age differences are more palpable.

I also don't want to be 40-50 years old pulling post wall bitches out of wine bars.

[NoMoreTO]

- Are you in wife hunting mode?
>> Passive Hunting/Knock her up if shes solid. Agree that the issue is rushing a critical decision.

- Does your game change at all while in wife hunting mode?
>> Slightly. More Day Game, More Social Circle Game, less night game & tinder/online game.

Do you approach less or more?
>> Approaches should be consistent with being a player. Just when you've got a good one you can lay off a little, but beware of cutting off all your options. As mentioned, you gotta have the abundance mentality - I agree with this.

Do you cut women off more frequently after the first day / first week / first month?
>> You can cut a woman out mentally of the wife circle. Then you have to decide whether you keep her on the line for fun, or cut her loose.

- Have you taken bigger and bigger steps to making this wife hunt mode investment? (changing cities, more gym time, new job, going out more etc.)
>> Living your purpose in your current life state is important. Whether you are a player or interested in a serious woman. Still you could design your life to get away from the 40 is the new 30 crowd in the city. Sell a Condo in a Metro Area, buy a house in the burbs or 2nd tier city, Take Friday night off at the bar and go to a spin class in the AM with the ladies at the gym. I'd say you'd have to want to do these things for yourself as much as for the 'wife hunt'. And yeah, if you can get a job working with a bunch of nurses or kindergarten teachers, that'd work too.

The hard thing about the wife hunt is that the sexy women aren't hunting themselves. So really, until quality men start accepting less attractive girls or their values as a wife, I'm not sure the sexual marketplace equilibrium will swing back

Anyone else on here think the knock up an equal alternative? In my younger days I'd say no, but from a practical perspective (legal) and for frame reasons (marriage does feel like supplication) it has its appeal. For me personally, if the wedding doesn't have the old school "promise to obey" vow on women's part, why bother! haha

[Jozi]

(12-03-2018 09:26 AM)James Bond Next level Wrote:  

Game
Chasing sluts and chasing potential wife is very different. First, a boner test is not sufficient for a potential wife. So get used to less sets, less sex (until you meet a partner of course) and way more screening from you. Prior of meeting her, I would suggest you make a list of what you really want (and need) of her. Forget the futile and keep the bare minimum on it so you will have a strong basis of comparison.
Also, less bad boy attitudes and more comprehension. But what will make the players here shake is time: take it to get to know the girl more deeply and don't rush sex on date 1. I'm not saying to develop oneitis but still.
Where to meet a potential partner changes too. Forget tinder, clubs and most of bars. Daygame or social circle seems like the best

I am new to LTR hunting as well but are you sure you need to switch up your game that much? I tried that for a period of time last year. I started playing the provider/potential boyfriend type from the first date and onwards. It did not end well. All of a sudden I started getting rejected when going for the bang etc. Met one girl whom I got into a mini relationship with, lasted 2-3 months. At the end I found her texting and meeting up with guys via Tinder while we were supposed to be "exclusive" (I did the same, but she didn't know that).

As women are like water, they will take the shape of whatever you project onto her. The same woman that will reject sleeping with you for several dates because you act like a potential boyfriend/provider, will bang another guy within half an hour if he acts like a player. This is 101 stuff but it didn't completely sink into my mind until I started experiencing it first hand.

So, the only way to really find out what the girl is made of, is to act the same way as you would if you just wanted a bang. You can mention that "in the future I probably want to settle down/have kids, but I'm in no rush and if it happens it'll happen when the time is right". Just to give her a little bit of hope/something to ponder on. But other than that, go all in on treating her like just another slut. You can only truly learn what she is about if you try your best to bring out the worst in her. If she loses interest in you, or clearly rejects your attempts, then that should be a good sign and you can start switching things up from there. It's easier to go from player to potential boyfriend than vice versa.

This has just been my conclusion so far. It could be that I am still meeting the wrong type of women (I definitely am, although I am continuously getting better at nexting quickly). But I am not sure things would be any different when/if meeting the "right" type of woman (or if they even exist).

[Jozi]

(12-04-2018 11:32 AM)TheFinalEpic Wrote:  

My analogy here is that you need to play a volume game continually in life, because it creates abundance, and an abundant mindset is where you get to find the gems in women, in business, and everything else. You have choice. You get to pick and choose who and what stays in your life. You're not going to find your 'wife' without going through 1000, 2000, hell maybe 10,000 girls (I'm not saying you need to bang 1000 girls, but in your lifetime, I'm sure you've interacted with well over this number).

What happens when you go through 1000, 2000 or 10,000 girls is that instead of getting closer to finding a wife, you will get farther from it. Humans are not built to build relationships with thousands of people. If you do then nobody will ever be good enough. It gets confusing and our brains cannot handle it. And I think that is a problem for all of us who have been doing this for a long time. We know too much, have met too many women, had too many black pilling experiences and revelations. And now we look at every woman we meet with exceptional scrutiny and doubt.

We should have our doubts obviously. This is a very important decision and the odds are heavily stacked against us. But it makes me wonder if I am ever going to find one that ticks all my boxes. There is always some red flag or something that doesn't add up. Could be that in the world we live in today, a long happy marriage with a young virgin woman of comparable attractiveness to your own isn't possible. It's a pipe dream and will never happen. And with that, marriage in itself isn't possible. Because either you will have to date down and be unhappy, or you will have to settle for a woman who rode the cock carousel and got pumped and dumped by men more attractive than you.

I have had this dilemma in my mind for a while now. Can't fully know until all options have been exhausted though. But if all else fails, would you settle for something less than what you think you're worth? I will not. I can't. If I didn't fuck 300 girls already, maybe I could be happy with a tattooed thot with a loose vagina on her way of hitting the wall. I'm sure most men can, because they're happy they just have a hole to stick it in. But not me. It's too late for that. And my biggest fear is that there is no other alternative.

[HankMoody]

LTRs are easy to find. Most women actually desire them. Once you've banged a girl, getting her to settle is easy. Take her hiking, on a vacation, or cook her dinner. Call her "babe" in public. Be her boyfriend -- now she's your girlfriend.. It's so fucking easy. Suddenly she's got visions of the two of you on a magazine wearing matching flannels with a dog and a baby. You can make her cook you dinner while you smoke stogies with your boys and she'll love it. You can fart at will and do shit like "yo babe, I gotta take a call, go get my cellphone, it's in the bedroom. I can't get up from the couch because my back is stiff." The more un-egalatarian shit you do, the more she will like you.

It's pickup that's tough. At first, these girls expect you to be Jason Momoa from Game of Thrones.

Once you cross the barrier, you'll find yourself falling into LTRs rather than seeking them out.

[TheFinalEpic]

(12-04-2018 07:33 PM)Jozi Wrote:  

(12-04-2018 11:32 AM)TheFinalEpic Wrote:  

My analogy here is that you need to play a volume game continually in life, because it creates abundance, and an abundant mindset is where you get to find the gems in women, in business, and everything else. You have choice. You get to pick and choose who and what stays in your life. You're not going to find your 'wife' without going through 1000, 2000, hell maybe 10,000 girls (I'm not saying you need to bang 1000 girls, but in your lifetime, I'm sure you've interacted with well over this number).

What happens when you go through 1000, 2000 or 10,000 girls is that instead of getting closer to finding a wife, you will get farther from it. Humans are not built to build relationships with thousands of people. If you do then nobody will ever be good enough. It gets confusing and our brains cannot handle it. And I think that is a problem for all of us who have been doing this for a long time. We know too much, have met too many women, had too many black pilling experiences and revelations. And now we look at every woman we meet with exceptional scrutiny and doubt.

We should have our doubts obviously. This is a very important decision and the odds are heavily stacked against us. But it makes me wonder if I am ever going to find one that ticks all my boxes. There is always some red flag or something that doesn't add up. Could be that in the world we live in today, a long happy marriage with a young virgin woman of comparable attractiveness to your own isn't possible. It's a pipe dream and will never happen. And with that, marriage in itself isn't possible. Because either you will have to date down and be unhappy, or you will have to settle for a woman who rode the cock carousel and got pumped and dumped by men more attractive than you.

I have had this dilemma in my mind for a while now. Can't fully know until all options have been exhausted though. But if all else fails, would you settle for something less than what you think you're worth? I will not. I can't. If I didn't fuck 300 girls already, maybe I could be happy with a tattooed thot with a loose vagina on her way of hitting the wall. I'm sure most men can, because they're happy they just have a hole to stick it in. But not me. It's too late for that. And my biggest fear is that there is no other alternative.

I don't know about you, man, but on a daily basis, I meet at minimum 2-5 people (75% of those being women generally). In one year, I meet between 1000 and 2000 people. In one year. Of those, the amount of people that I actually build a relationship is probably at maximum 5-10.

What I am saying is that you need to be meeting a lot of people in your life, and filtering out the 99% that aren't worth your time or energy (not just women, but friends, business contacts, and those that can help you on your journey). Not once did I claim that you need to be fucking these women, or anything. But you need to be meeting them, and making decisions about who gets to stay and who you don't want around.

We get this rap about us that all women are trash, and I can see where it comes from. But come on man, if you're meeting 10 women a week, they're not going to be all bad. You're jaded, I'm jaded, but at the end of the day, you have to approach life like a puppy; optimistic and happy even though you may get kicked by the next person that you cross paths with. I get the negativity, but life's too short.

[TheFinalEpic]

(12-04-2018 08:24 PM)HankMoody Wrote:  

LTRs are easy to find. Most women actually desire them. Once you've banged a girl, getting her to settle is easy. Take her hiking, on a vacation, or cook her dinner. Call her "babe" in public. Be her boyfriend -- now she's your girlfriend.. It's so fucking easy. Suddenly she's got visions of the two of you on a magazine wearing matching flannels with a dog and a baby. You can make her cook you dinner while you smoke stogies with your boys and she'll love it. You can fart at will and do shit like "yo babe, I gotta take a call, go get my cellphone, it's in the bedroom. I can't get up from the couch because my back is stiff." The more un-egalatarian shit you do, the more she will like you.

It's pickup that's tough. At first, these girls expect you to be Jason Momoa from Game of Thrones.

Once you cross the barrier, you'll find yourself falling into LTRs rather than seeking them out.

This is my point in my initial post.

You don't seek our LTRs, they just happen by the fact that you're a guy she likes and wants to spend time with. I usually have to shoot down girls that get attached after they've seen what I bring to the table. Most girls definitely want to be locked down by a high value guy.

The second that you start to be like "I want a relationship" is the second your pussy stream dries up and you're alone, because you reek of the desperation. She should be asking you to get into a relationship, not the other way around.

[HankMoody]

(12-04-2018 08:24 PM)TheFinalEpic Wrote:  

(12-04-2018 07:33 PM)Jozi Wrote:  

(12-04-2018 11:32 AM)TheFinalEpic Wrote:  

My analogy here is that you need to play a volume game continually in life, because it creates abundance, and an abundant mindset is where you get to find the gems in women, in business, and everything else. You have choice. You get to pick and choose who and what stays in your life. You're not going to find your 'wife' without going through 1000, 2000, hell maybe 10,000 girls (I'm not saying you need to bang 1000 girls, but in your lifetime, I'm sure you've interacted with well over this number).

What happens when you go through 1000, 2000 or 10,000 girls is that instead of getting closer to finding a wife, you will get farther from it. Humans are not built to build relationships with thousands of people. If you do then nobody will ever be good enough. It gets confusing and our brains cannot handle it. And I think that is a problem for all of us who have been doing this for a long time. We know too much, have met too many women, had too many black pilling experiences and revelations. And now we look at every woman we meet with exceptional scrutiny and doubt.

We should have our doubts obviously. This is a very important decision and the odds are heavily stacked against us. But it makes me wonder if I am ever going to find one that ticks all my boxes. There is always some red flag or something that doesn't add up. Could be that in the world we live in today, a long happy marriage with a young virgin woman of comparable attractiveness to your own isn't possible. It's a pipe dream and will never happen. And with that, marriage in itself isn't possible. Because either you will have to date down and be unhappy, or you will have to settle for a woman who rode the cock carousel and got pumped and dumped by men more attractive than you.

I have had this dilemma in my mind for a while now. Can't fully know until all options have been exhausted though. But if all else fails, would you settle for something less than what you think you're worth? I will not. I can't. If I didn't fuck 300 girls already, maybe I could be happy with a tattooed thot with a loose vagina on her way of hitting the wall. I'm sure most men can, because they're happy they just have a hole to stick it in. But not me. It's too late for that. And my biggest fear is that there is no other alternative.

I don't know about you, man, but on a daily basis, I meet at minimum 2-5 people (75% of those being women generally). In one year, I meet between 1000 and 2000 people. In one year. Of those, the amount of people that I actually build a relationship is probably at maximum 5-10.

What I am saying is that you need to be meeting a lot of people in your life, and filtering out the 99% that aren't worth your time or energy (not just women, but friends, business contacts, and those that can help you on your journey). Not once did I claim that you need to be fucking these women, or anything. But you need to be meeting them, and making decisions about who gets to stay and who you don't want around.

We get this rap about us that all women are trash, and I can see where it comes from. But come on man, if you're meeting 10 women a week, they're not going to be all bad. You're jaded, I'm jaded, but at the end of the day, you have to approach life like a puppy; optimistic and happy even though you may get kicked by the next person that you cross paths with. I get the negativity, but life's too short.

Dude, I'll be straight here...

Women and men aren't that different.

Most women generally want a man to do stuff with (hike, kayak, drive to the beach with).

We men mostly want the same, too.

But we have created this false narrative that every woman is on Instagram camwhoring. Every desirable female is a whore looking to fuck her next bartender or club promoter who lifts weights. Only "Chad" gets sex now.

In reality, if you're a well adjusted dude, things all work itself out.

[HankMoody]

(12-04-2018 08:31 PM)TheFinalEpic Wrote:  

(12-04-2018 08:24 PM)HankMoody Wrote:  

LTRs are easy to find. Most women actually desire them. Once you've banged a girl, getting her to settle is easy. Take her hiking, on a vacation, or cook her dinner. Call her "babe" in public. Be her boyfriend -- now she's your girlfriend.. It's so fucking easy. Suddenly she's got visions of the two of you on a magazine wearing matching flannels with a dog and a baby. You can make her cook you dinner while you smoke stogies with your boys and she'll love it. You can fart at will and do shit like "yo babe, I gotta take a call, go get my cellphone, it's in the bedroom. I can't get up from the couch because my back is stiff." The more un-egalatarian shit you do, the more she will like you.

It's pickup that's tough. At first, these girls expect you to be Jason Momoa from Game of Thrones.

Once you cross the barrier, you'll find yourself falling into LTRs rather than seeking them out.

This is my point in my initial post.

You don't seek our LTRs, they just happen by the fact that you're a guy she likes and wants to spend time with. I usually have to shoot down girls that get attached after they've seen what I bring to the table. Most girls definitely want to be locked down by a high value guy.

The second that you start to be like "I want a relationship" is the second your pussy stream dries up and you're alone, because you reek of the desperation. She should be asking you to get into a relationship, not the other way around.

Agree. Good post.

I do not consider myself a "pickup artist" at all. But I do have a lot of cool girls in my life.

When I sleep alone, it's by choice (or because I ate something I shouldn't have and my farts could kill another human being).

[CleanSlate]

I can't get on board with the term "wife hunting" because I think that puts you in the wrong frame of mind. Like the other posters said, it puts you in a place of desperation where you are the one seeking a relationship, not the other way around.

It's hard to explain the nuances and it does sound like we're here splitting hairs, but think about it for a minute. You could have the best checklist for a wife in the world, but you do realize that by actively seeking a relationship, you throw that checklist out the window. As soon as you get the bang, you start trying to fit a square peg into a round hole (no pun intended) precisely because you are in the frame of mind where you actively seek LTRs rather than qualifying girls for them. On a subconscious level, you start trying to "force" a relationship, even if you intellectually deny it. Needless to say, that can lead to a disaster. I've been there.

Instead, the right frame of mind is to be the qualifier. You have a woman whom you've been banging for a few weeks or a few months, or are spinning plates with a harem, but you aren't actively trying to get a girlfriend, at least not right away. Instead, you spend time with your women and get to know them, peel back the layers, and view them with a critical mind. Let the red flags reveal themselves and dump them when they do. Easier said than done, I know, but if you want a wife, you don't have time to waste with liars, cheats, sluts, and degenerates. You have to be cutthroat and ruthless in your qualifying.

So when you have a woman you've been with for 6-12 months, and no red flags have presented themselves, and you've already met her family on more than a few occasions... she seems to check all the boxes on your list, ONLY then perhaps you start thinking about a future with her.

To sum it up, you don't "hunt" or "search" for a wife. You find a wife through process of elimination.

[zoom]

(12-04-2018 09:28 PM)CleanSlate Wrote:  

So when you have a woman you've been with for 6-12 months, and no red flags have presented themselves, and you've already met her family on more than a few occasions... she seems to check all the boxes on your list, ONLY then perhaps you start thinking about a future with her.

To sum it up, you don't "hunt" or "search" for a wife. You find a wife through process of elimination.

I would have to disagree with this philosophy. For me personally I'm looking to marry a debt-free, non-tatooed, virgin.

I think you definitely have to hunt for those since they are a rare breed. They don't just come out of nowhere.

Edit: Let me clarify a bit. By being in active wife hunting mode you should be trying make connections with traditional families and getting involved with your church. If you make the right connections then you could get a semi-arranged marriage.

[rudebwoy]

Yes, somewhat.

[BlackFriar]

I am.

[NoMoreTO]

(12-04-2018 07:00 PM)Jozi Wrote:  

(12-03-2018 09:26 AM)James Bond Next level Wrote:  

Game
Chasing sluts and chasing potential wife is very different....

Where to meet a potential partner changes too. Forget tinder, clubs and most of bars. Daygame or social circle seems like the best

...
So, the only way to really find out what the girl is made of, is to act the same way as you would if you just wanted a bang. You can mention that "in the future I probably want to settle down/have kids, but I'm in no rush and if it happens it'll happen when the time is right"...

Agree totally. Its the worst feeling being the boyfriend to some girl who gives it up easy to a player. Most of us have been on the other side of that equation, pounding some slut then she relationships up with some dork who has this big smile and posts geeky photos with her on facebook. Its a strange thing to see.

Fuck man, I wish there was some place or subculture you could go to where the chicks weren't sluts. But we're out of luck. I guess there are church girls, but they either marry up by 20 or become secret sluts.

For marriage I Would say filter a low notch count girl (<5) for the following:
- 2 parents still married
- Young (this is a trade that usually goes against looks, and notch count)
- good in bed but low slut flags (tattoos, lives alone, guy friends)
- follows your lead 100% / admires you

[rudebwoy]

^The girls I have had that were good in bed, were not the girls I would put a ring on their finger.

[HankMoody]

Here is the catch 22...

You have a lot of dudes now bitching on the forum about girls who will settle for nothing but "Chad."

Ok.

But what are you willing to settle for? A regular girl who will camp with you, and drive out to buy you Powerades when you're sick? Or a "misunderstood" Instagram sloot with a Patreon account?

If you're down with a "regular" girl, it's not hard to have an LTR. I would say, in my estimation, most girls just want a guy who they can do stuff with. Go to concerts with, camp, road trip, ski, lay around naked in bed, watch the Food Network, maybe do a yoga glass, yadda yadda. That is actually what most girls want. A compadre.

Once you get passed the pickup portion of game, the rest is pretty simple. Most women just want someone to share a life with. A lot of "regular" girls are pretty fucking hot, too. And cool.

However, if you want to bang hot smoots on the regular, more power to you. It's just an entirely different ballgame and lifestyle. If your goal is to bang smuts in the back of your car in a parking lot, that's awesome. It's is just a totally different approach.

Also, understand that an LTR will likely involve a girl who farts in her sleep, leaves her shoes in your living room, and leaves toothpaste in the sink. An LTR is lot of reality - who left dishes in the sink, who is doing laundry tonight, who is cooking, who left shoes where shoes not ought to be. When you get deeper, it also involves kids and joint finances.

[MongolianAbroad]

(12-05-2018 01:10 AM)HankMoody Wrote:  

Also, understand that an LTR will likely involve a girl who farts in her sleep, leaves her shoes in your living room, and leaves toothpaste in the sink. An LTR is lot of reality - who left dishes in the sink, who is doing laundry tonight, who is cooking, who left shoes where shoes not ought to be. When you get deeper, it also involves kids and joint finances.

You're LTR'ing the wrong girls if they're leaving shoes where you can trip and toothpaste in the sink, Hank. Same if you're spending any time debating who's washing dishes, doing laundry, and cooking.

I'll agree that that actually is a reality for a lot of guys, though, so caution is in order.

[HankMoody]

(12-05-2018 01:33 AM)Spaniard88 Wrote:  

(12-05-2018 01:10 AM)HankMoody Wrote:  

Also, understand that an LTR will likely involve a girl who farts in her sleep, leaves her shoes in your living room, and leaves toothpaste in the sink. An LTR is lot of reality - who left dishes in the sink, who is doing laundry tonight, who is cooking, who left shoes where shoes not ought to be. When you get deeper, it also involves kids and joint finances.

You're LTR'ing the wrong girls if they're leaving shoes where you can trip and toothpaste in the sink. Same if you're spending any time debating who's washing dishes, doing laundry, and cooking.

Eh, I don't know how best to write this.

This Sunday we did a dinner for my church. The girls cooked dinner while the boys smoked cigars. Everyone was real happy. The boys sat around and the girls cooked stuff. Then we all ate and listened to music.

So, I think I agree with you in principle, but I'm trying to make a point.

LTRs involve a lot of "regular bullshit." Girls fart in their sleep, leave stupid shit in your fridge, and their shoes are fucking everywhere. Literally everywhere.

It's a lot of day to day stuff.

[MongolianAbroad]

DELETE.

[HankMoody]

Final point when it comes to LTRs...

I'm not saying you need to vacuum the house every night and finish your "honey do" list.

What I am saying is there is a bunch of regular shit. She's going to leave hair in your drain, eat the last few bites of your lo mein, and put her shoes in a place where you will trip on them. LTRs involve some level of cohabitation. It's like having a roommate except you bang and go do stuff together on the weekends. Sometimes it's cool, but sometimes they do really annoying shit.

When you're completely single you don't have to worry about it because you bang them and they go home. You can fuck them in your car in a parking lot, or even class it up and get a hotel room. Or maybe they just come over here and there but don't stay awhile.

On the other hand, when you do it right, she'll do your laundry, clean the dishes, and you'll never want for sex. Deep down, even the most hottest, feminist women want to be domesticated. If you provide a fun, secure household for her, she isn't going anywhere.

Usually the girls who come over "just to chill" end up moving in the LTR direction without you doing anything. You'll find that she ironed your shirts, did your dishes, hung up your ties, and changed the cat litter. All cool, but she is trying to get you into a LTR.

Then the question becomes whether you want to be in an LTR or continue to smash smoots. There is no wrong answer; just whatever your preference is.

[RWIsrael]

(12-05-2018 07:34 AM)HankMoody Wrote:  

Final point when it comes to LTRs...

I'm not saying you need to vacuum the house every night and finish your "honey do" list.

What I am saying is there is a bunch of regular shit. She's going to leave hair in your drain, eat the last few bites of your lo mein, and put her shoes in a place where you will trip on them. LTRs involve some level of cohabitation. It's like having a roommate except you bang and go do stuff together on the weekends. Sometimes it's cool, but sometimes they do really annoying shit.

When you're completely single you don't have to worry about it because you bang them and they go home. You can fuck them in your car in a parking lot, or even class it up and get a hotel room. Or maybe they just come over here and there but don't stay awhile.

On the other hand, when you do it right, she'll do your laundry, clean the dishes, and you'll never want for sex. Deep down, even the most hottest, feminist women want to be domesticated. If you provide a fun, secure household for her, she isn't going anywhere.

Usually the girls who come over "just to chill" end up moving in the LTR direction without you doing anything. You'll find that she ironed your shirts, did your dishes, hung up your ties, and changed the cat litter. All cool, but she is trying to get you into a LTR.

Then the question becomes whether you want to be in an LTR or continue to smash smoots. There is no wrong answer; just whatever your preference is.

Good stuff Hank, just gotta watch out for getting too comfortable, too predictable etc.
Even once you land your LTR/Wife the game never stops and you have to maintain attraction and high value, neg and tease her etc.

If you are looking for a wife/LTR, also consider the following:
I have noticed that finances become a real issue, as we men tend to save, invest and think long term while the girls love to find excuses to spend money.
It's not always expensive things but they do add up over time and we're not saving as much as we should be / agreed to.

We've got a plan to live frugally for a year to save for a house or whatever, but she can't seem to go more than a month or two without getting the urge to spend on activities.

Obviously I tell her no from time to time but it tends to shift the dynamic since now she is the one leading, meaning she is coming up with ideas for nights out, restaurants, movies and holidays abroad, while I have to be the boring responsible adult shutting her down or just following along. I don't suggest these ideas myself since I've got the money and savings on my mind.

I don't want to cater to her every wish but having to be the one who says NO all the time can kill the excitement as well as letting her lead too much and causing me to be passive, since I won't be suggesting fun activities.

[EndsExpect]

(12-02-2018 03:16 PM)sharksfanguy88 Wrote:  

"I'm in wife hunt mode now, because I don't want to be stressed out about it and rush it later". He pointed out to me that he very likely would want to date a girl at least 1-2 years before proposing - so if he meets his future wife today, he's married at 36. If he meets her in 2 years, he's 38. He argued that it's the single biggest, most important decision of your life. It's picking the person that you wake up next to for 40-100 years, it's picking the mother of your future children. Dudes spend decades on their careers and their bodies and their bank accounts - why is it so insane to think that finding the woman you'll be with forever might be worthy of a multiple year investment?
- Are you in wife hunting mode?
- Does your game change at all while in wife hunting mode? Do you approach less or more? Do you cut women off more frequently after the first day / first week / first month?
- Have you taken bigger and bigger steps to making this wife hunt mode investment? (changing cities, more gym time, new job, going out more etc.)
Would love your thoughts.

So, I'm on the other side of this. I did a damn good job. I have a good feminine loyal wife, a great kid, and working on a second. Been married over 5 years, and survived stuff that ends most marriages.

What I can tell you is that you are over romanticizing marriage. You should stop that because it will fuck you up down the road.

Women think love is a feeling, and that when you stop feeling the love then you... "love someone but are not IN LOVE". This is what stupid people think love is. All emotions are ephemeral by nature. Love is a choice you make. You have to wake up every fucking day and say... "I choose to love this woman". Pick a woman that makes this choice easier and you will have a good life. If you pick a woman that also understands that love isn't some feeling that comes and goes... that its a choice she makes and that sometimes you are going to make it a hard choice... then you will do fine.