It's my 4th month after beginning university and i'm going to give an honest absolutely no bs analysis of how it has been so far. I just felt like manifesting my thoughts because i've been stressed for 2 months and whilst my time at university has been both great and not so great, right now it's seriously becoming the latter and I want to change that.
I haven't been doing pretty much any work, my course is only 12 hours a week of lectures and not all of them I find interesting. I have only had around 3 assignments so far and attained around 58% (pass is 40), embarressingly my attendance is around 60%. I like my subject but the social science part in my degree - urban planning, is seriously boring and super-left wing brainwash (I just want to learn how to plan cities, not get told by a soy-diet lecturer that I should be a male feminist). The issue here is that in sixth form (high school) I had around 27hrs a week of sheer lessons and my week was productive, I worked my ass off. Imagine going from 27hrs of lessons to 12hrs, my life feels like a joke, this university feels like a holiday, a lot of the time i'm bored or chilling.
The first weeks (especially freshers week) consisted me of partying at least 5 days a week and drinking a lot, my game was also on a good level (but not the best as it has been before uni). Now I go out once a week or less and have completely stopped approaching girls. My social anxiety has returned and it was never this bad. I also stay locked in my room too much and procrastinate, I have constant bags under my eyes and look at screens too much. I am constantly fighting with my PMO addiction.
I have serious financial issues due to a delayed loan application and I am being chased by my university plus my rent has been due for 4 months and I am being chased and threatened with letters. My money is limited and this is also the reason I go clubbing less.
Since the start I have secured 0 notches but fingered 2 girls and made out with around 6. I could have lost my virginity on the first week but due to an unfortunate circumstance (her pussy stank) and then later performance issues with another girl I shot myself in the foot. Luckily I have 4 solid leads right now, however 2 of them want LTR's and im stressing because I don't want to pump and dump them cos i'll feel guilty or date them either cos I wanna start piping many girls.
So I guess for 4 months i've been stuck in pussy purgatory, i've had girls in my bed and my fingers inside them but I haven't had sex. If you ask the majority of people if I'm a virgin they would say no because my game and frame is good for my age. I guess the thought that I need to lose my virginity is constantly stressing me, I think about this every day and it's messing up my mind. The problem with me is that I arguably have sharp game, I have made some crazy approaches in daygame and nightgame and one of my coursemates thinks im a player as he's seen me walk around with multiple girls at various times, I have managed to pull a girl staight from the dancefloor to her room in 3 hours without knowing her name but no.. I still haven't banged. I'm frustrated tbh.
I have no job despite applying to a total of 20 places both online and in store with a cv although I looked for jobs very late, I need to look harder. My parents also cannot support me financially so my parents call me every week and are angry that I haven't found a job - I can't blame them. I have had a job before in the summer and I felt completely independent, this is what im trying to achieve again.
I go to the gym at least 3 times a week and play basketball outdoors twice a week, although progress is slow and I eat junk food too often.
Overall, I think university's not worth it for my course, it feels like a joke and I feel un-productive. Ive been thinking to just say f*ck it and do an apprenticeship and become an electrician or something like that. I don't jump out of bed every morning and get excited to learn my subject, that's the honest truth. At the same time this degree can land me very good jobs in the future but god knows if this is really what I want to do. I'm also in crazy debt already and im not motivated as I used to be a year ago for anything, im more apathetic and less optimistic.
I am trying to become more motivated and independent. Should I rethink the university path if im not that happy? How can I get my life together and start taking it seriously?
I haven't been doing pretty much any work, my course is only 12 hours a week of lectures and not all of them I find interesting. I have only had around 3 assignments so far and attained around 58% (pass is 40), embarressingly my attendance is around 60%. I like my subject but the social science part in my degree - urban planning, is seriously boring and super-left wing brainwash (I just want to learn how to plan cities, not get told by a soy-diet lecturer that I should be a male feminist). The issue here is that in sixth form (high school) I had around 27hrs a week of sheer lessons and my week was productive, I worked my ass off. Imagine going from 27hrs of lessons to 12hrs, my life feels like a joke, this university feels like a holiday, a lot of the time i'm bored or chilling.
The first weeks (especially freshers week) consisted me of partying at least 5 days a week and drinking a lot, my game was also on a good level (but not the best as it has been before uni). Now I go out once a week or less and have completely stopped approaching girls. My social anxiety has returned and it was never this bad. I also stay locked in my room too much and procrastinate, I have constant bags under my eyes and look at screens too much. I am constantly fighting with my PMO addiction.
I have serious financial issues due to a delayed loan application and I am being chased by my university plus my rent has been due for 4 months and I am being chased and threatened with letters. My money is limited and this is also the reason I go clubbing less.
Since the start I have secured 0 notches but fingered 2 girls and made out with around 6. I could have lost my virginity on the first week but due to an unfortunate circumstance (her pussy stank) and then later performance issues with another girl I shot myself in the foot. Luckily I have 4 solid leads right now, however 2 of them want LTR's and im stressing because I don't want to pump and dump them cos i'll feel guilty or date them either cos I wanna start piping many girls.
So I guess for 4 months i've been stuck in pussy purgatory, i've had girls in my bed and my fingers inside them but I haven't had sex. If you ask the majority of people if I'm a virgin they would say no because my game and frame is good for my age. I guess the thought that I need to lose my virginity is constantly stressing me, I think about this every day and it's messing up my mind. The problem with me is that I arguably have sharp game, I have made some crazy approaches in daygame and nightgame and one of my coursemates thinks im a player as he's seen me walk around with multiple girls at various times, I have managed to pull a girl staight from the dancefloor to her room in 3 hours without knowing her name but no.. I still haven't banged. I'm frustrated tbh.
I have no job despite applying to a total of 20 places both online and in store with a cv although I looked for jobs very late, I need to look harder. My parents also cannot support me financially so my parents call me every week and are angry that I haven't found a job - I can't blame them. I have had a job before in the summer and I felt completely independent, this is what im trying to achieve again.
I go to the gym at least 3 times a week and play basketball outdoors twice a week, although progress is slow and I eat junk food too often.
Overall, I think university's not worth it for my course, it feels like a joke and I feel un-productive. Ive been thinking to just say f*ck it and do an apprenticeship and become an electrician or something like that. I don't jump out of bed every morning and get excited to learn my subject, that's the honest truth. At the same time this degree can land me very good jobs in the future but god knows if this is really what I want to do. I'm also in crazy debt already and im not motivated as I used to be a year ago for anything, im more apathetic and less optimistic.
I am trying to become more motivated and independent. Should I rethink the university path if im not that happy? How can I get my life together and start taking it seriously?
