[EmotionalGeek]

On friday. I was standing at the bar drinking my whiskey. I saw girl standing 1 meter from the counter waiting for some space to open. She student was solid 8 or 9. I am 33. I make her some space. She comes to counter. I tell her that she just should say if she wanted to stand her. We get some short exchange but I ran out of the things to say so I turned my back to her and sipped my drink for about a minute. Then I go to dance. I meet her on dancing floor so I start to talk to her. It is going good. She is responsive. We start to dance and talk a lot teasing each other. When she want go to bathroom she say few times she will be back and she is after minute or so. When I go she waits for me. When we go to bar she catches my hand and if I squeeze she squeezes back. We were talking for about 5 hours. She tells me few times that she has classes next day but she stays.

I am certain that she will give me her number. At 4pm I says that I have to go because I have to drive in the morning. I feel she immediately loses interest. She say she does not remember and go to chaning room. After a while I decide to follow. I go there and she ask why I am here. I says that I told her that I am going home. Her friend says "He wants to walk you to bus". Friend goes one one she with me goes other way. After short walk she takes my hand (I did

not offer). We are walking like this and talking. When bus arrives I ask her for number again she says bus is here so I jump to the bus with her. There she checks her number on the phone the tells me but she switches one digit. I suspect that she did it intentionally but ping her and then she gives me right number. After we live the bus I try to convince her by humor and light banter that she takes me home. But after 30 minutes she extends the hand. I accept and go for the taxi.

On Sunday 19:20PM I sent message but I did not receive the answer.

I do not understand the situation. The dialog was really light and funny. I was really into her because of her character not looks and I really felt like we were soul mates. I was convinced she felt the same.

I think I did following errors:

1. Poor eye contact
2. Poor kino
3. I was not leading at the moments I felt like she was leading.
4. At the end I tried to be persistent but maybe I was a bit needy.

I do not understand this sudden lost of interest when she seemed very receptive and into me for like 5 hours and need some explanation. I feel wrecked today and have very ill humor. I want to avoid similar situations in the future.

[torridon747]

Sounds like she isn't that into you for some of the reasons you already listed. Charge it to the game friend. Work on your kino and eye contact (stuff that makes up the "vibe"). Try to lead the interaction and distinguish yourself from the crowd by being somewhat obstanant to social suggestions (commands). You want to lead. Your authority comes from the fact you're a strong man with options, no need to be needy or hung up on any one girl that you've just barely had an interaction with.

Her friend was trying to get her laid and she was open to it. You didn't display the traits and behaviour to get the job done. You got a pass from her friends which is fucking key, but didn't do the seduction bit very well. You obviously did something right to get that pass but didn't build enough attraction to get the job done. Try being a little more agressive in your actions.

Don't take it too hard just take notes on where you need to improve go next and game other girls.

[UlteriorMotive]

This belongs in the newbie forum.

You answered your own question with what you believe you did wrong.

(04-24-2017 02:33 PM)EmotionalGeek Wrote:  

I was really into her because of her character not looks and I really felt like we were soul mates. I was convinced she felt the same.

I feel wrecked today and have very ill humor. I want to avoid similar situations in the future.

You need to work on your inner-game a lot by the sound of this.

You're becoming emotionally attached to a woman you haven't even had the chance to get to know and feel like she is your soul-mate?

[PapayaTapper]

(04-24-2017 02:33 PM)EmotionalGeek Wrote:  

On friday. I was standing at the bar drinking my whiskey. I saw girl standing 1 meter from the counter waiting for some space to open. She student was solid 8 or 9. I am 33. I make her some space. She comes to counter. I tell her that she just should say if she wanted to stand her. We get some short exchange but I ran out of the things to say so I turned my back to her and sipped my drink for about a minute. Then I go to dance. I meet her on dancing floor so I start to talk to her. It is going good. She is responsive. We start to dance and talk a lot teasing each other. When she want go to bathroom she say few times she will be back and she is after minute or so. When I go she waits for me. When we go to bar she catches my hand and if I squeeze she squeezes back. We were talking for about 5 hours. She tells me few times that she has classes next day but she stays.

I am certain that she will give me her number. At 4pm I says that I have to go because I have to drive in the morning. I feel she immediately loses interest. She say she does not remember and go to chaning room. After a while I decide to follow. I go there and she ask why I am here. I says that I told her that I am going home. Her friend says "He wants to walk you to bus". Friend goes one one she with me goes other way. After short walk she takes my hand (I did

not offer). We are walking like this and talking. When bus arrives I ask her for number again she says bus is here so I jump to the bus with her. There she checks her number on the phone the tells me but she switches one digit. I suspect that she did it intentionally but ping her and then she gives me right number. After we live the bus I try to convince her by humor and light banter that she takes me home. But after 30 minutes she extends the hand. I accept and go for the taxi.

On Sunday 19:20PM I sent message but I did not receive the answer.

I do not understand the situation. The dialog was really light and funny. I was really into her because of her character not looks and I really felt like we were soul mates. I was convinced she felt the same.

I think I did following errors:

1. Poor eye contact
2. Poor kino
3. I was not leading at the moments I felt like she was leading.
4. At the end I tried to be persistent but maybe I was a bit needy.

I do not understand this sudden lost of interest when she seemed very receptive and into me for like 5 hours and need some explanation. I feel wrecked today and have very ill humor. I want to avoid similar situations in the future.

Hard to say but my guess is she probably has a BF that she's neither 100% committed to or to cheating on.

Plus 5 hours is too long...especially at one venue. You should be moving this back to your place at 90 min -2hrs max if there's alcohol involved

[Rocha]

(04-24-2017 02:33 PM)EmotionalGeek Wrote:  

On friday. I was standing at the bar drinking my whiskey. I saw girl standing 1 meter from the counter waiting for some space to open. She student was solid 8 or 9. I am 33. I make her some space. She comes to counter. I tell her that she just should say if she wanted to stand her. We get some short exchange but I ran out of the things to say so I turned my back to her and sipped my drink for about a minute. Then I go to dance. I meet her on dancing floor so I start to talk to her. It is going good. She is responsive. We start to dance and talk a lot teasing each other. When she want go to bathroom she say few times she will be back and she is after minute or so. When I go she waits for me. When we go to bar she catches my hand and if I squeeze she squeezes back. We were talking for about 5 hours. She tells me few times that she has classes next day but she stays.

I am certain that she will give me her number. At 4pm I says that I have to go because I have to drive in the morning. I feel she immediately loses interest. She say she does not remember and go to chaning room. After a while I decide to follow. I go there and she ask why I am here. I says that I told her that I am going home. Her friend says "He wants to walk you to bus". Friend goes one one she with me goes other way. After short walk she takes my hand (I did

not offer). We are walking like this and talking. When bus arrives I ask her for number again she says bus is here so I jump to the bus with her. There she checks her number on the phone the tells me but she switches one digit. I suspect that she did it intentionally but ping her and then she gives me right number. After we live the bus I try to convince her by humor and light banter that she takes me home. But after 30 minutes she extends the hand. I accept and go for the taxi.

On Sunday 19:20PM I sent message but I did not receive the answer.

I do not understand the situation. The dialog was really light and funny. I was really into her because of her character not looks and I really felt like we were soul mates. I was convinced she felt the same.

I think I did following errors:

1. Poor eye contact
2. Poor kino
3. I was not leading at the moments I felt like she was leading.
4. At the end I tried to be persistent but maybe I was a bit needy.

I do not understand this sudden lost of interest when she seemed very receptive and into me for like 5 hours and need some explanation. I feel wrecked today and have very ill humor. I want to avoid similar situations in the future.

Even 10 minutes sometimes is an eternity to escalate, imagine 5 hours...you should have went for the kill...shit like this happens in two occasions, or when we still do not have enough confidence in ourselves, or when the chick is meh and we (guys) are in doubt if it is worth the kill...

Just keep approaching, get used to female companionship, do not project your dreams in someone else (like thinking she is your dreamgirl, or soulmate....etc), learn to read the signs that they women give, learn to feel comfortable with them women, only the life experience will help you here.
You are in Poland, so it's not a bad place to get to that point fast.

And last but not least, do not feel miserable or pissed off because some chick did not complied with your advances. That's how this works, yes, it can be brutal, but the rewards many times make for it.

Now, have some drinks, go and approach. Like the good ol' Billy Idol says...

Hey little sister what have you done
Hey little sister who's the only one
Hey little sister who's your superman
Hey little sister who's the one you want
Hey little sister shotgun!
It's a nice day to start again

[EmotionalGeek]

(04-24-2017 02:46 PM)UlteriorMotive Wrote:  

This belongs in the newbie forum.

You answered your own question with what you believe you did wrong.

(04-24-2017 02:33 PM)EmotionalGeek Wrote:  

I was really into her because of her character not looks and I really felt like we were soul mates. I was convinced she felt the same.

I feel wrecked today and have very ill humor. I want to avoid similar situations in the future.

You need to work on your inner-game a lot by the sound of this.

You're becoming emotionally attached to a woman you haven't even had the chance to get to know and feel like she is your soul-mate?

I used those lines to emphasize how good interaction seemed to be. I feel like this for the first time after/during night in club.

[Steelex]

It's simple.

She doesn't like you.

[EmotionalGeek]

(04-24-2017 04:32 PM)Steelex Wrote:  

It's simple.

She doesn't like you.

Why did she spend so much time with me? Why so many IOI's?

[Beirut]

My read based on not being there:

I think if she wasnt attracted she wouldnt have stayed. Her friend leaving her with you is another sign that she was.

The interaction is too long and your game cracked.

She stuck around all night waiting for you to lead her into bed then you hit her with the i have to drive in the morning, then you take her to a bus going to her home and try to take a number.

She was attracted to the confident older man hitting on her and wanted to sleep with you. You didnt act on that and instead spent hours at the bar then you chickened out at the end, which killed the vibe for her and her mental image of the interaction cracked.

That plus a very long night out takes its toll on a girls and mans mood sometimes. They get physically tired and it translates into their behavior.

Ive had too many interactions end up like that, sometimes the silliest thing triggers it. ironically, sometimes youre in the zone and game TOO WELL early on and if it drags on it ends up backfiring when you slip up.

[Steelex]

Cause she was playing you like a fiddle.

Did she kiss you?

Make out with you?

Suck your dick?

No.

But you spent 5 hours entertaining her like a fucking clown, feeding her ego, probably bought her a few drinks.

[PapayaTapper]

(04-24-2017 04:32 PM)Steelex Wrote:  

It's simple.

She doesn't like you.

She didn't "like" how he made her feel is more accurate.

Attraction is not a choice. It is a response.

There are no "magic words", actions, etc. If there were then that's all you'd need to learn

How you make them feel the "tingles" is irrelevant...only that you do

[Tigre]

Sounds like lack of initiative might have been your downfall on that night.

She probably wants to be led.

You approached. There was attraction. But you didn't lead her to the bedroom. Or even give her a strong reason to see you again.

Instead, you just kind of let things happen around you until it was too late. 4am came around, and then you folded a winning hand without seeing how well it played.

There could be other reasons for it, I guess. I just went with the most likely one.

[churros]

(04-24-2017 02:47 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

(04-24-2017 02:33 PM)EmotionalGeek Wrote:  

...

Plus 5 hours is too long...especially at one venue. You should be moving this back to your place at 90 min -2hrs max if there's alcohol involved

Reminds me of that guy who drinks seven rounds on a date.

I agree you didn't escalate rapidly enough OP. Two hours tops, even one hour would have done it.

I don't fault OP for giving a shit. When the girl is hot enough, you should give a shit. How you recover is what makes the player.

In that respect alone, OP is already ahead of dudes banging those online 5s.

[Rhyme or Reason]

Quote:

We were talking for about 5 hours.

This is terrible. Horrible. If you're going to be persistent, be persistent with a certain goal in mind...like escalation. Hanging around like you did without nutting up and busting some moves or escalating just tells her you're

A) too much of a pussy to go after what you want in a direct, timely manner

B) you have nothing better to do / no other prospects

Quote:

I do not understand this sudden lost of interest when she seemed very receptive and into me for like 5 hours and need some explanation. I feel wrecked today and have very ill humor. I want to avoid similar situations in the future.

You don't understand how women operate. They are fickle. It's very possible she was interested at one point and lost that interest quickly after something you said or did that you were not conscience of. In order to correct this for future reference you should learn to rapidly identify when a girl is no longer interested so you can cut the cord and move on to your next target.

You definitely creeped her out by following her to the changing room and following her on the bus, then badgering her for her real # after giving you a fake one. Not trying to white knight for this hypothetical broad but you are making my Theoretical Pussy dry up more than the Mojave Desert just reading about that.

And give me a break with the soulmate shit. Come on. This girl you thought was your soulmate is more than likely talking about how much you creeped her out to her friends at this very moment. Take that poosy off the pedestal.

As for the "i loved her personality" shit, not sure why you're selling that here...you can be honest with us, man. You we both know that you thought she was hott and you wanted to fuck her like a whore. That was the cause of your attraction. No need to dress it up in some bullshit esoteric romantic way. Girls want to be treated like the whores they are, by the way, including this one, so just remember that the next time you encounter your next 'soul mate'.

The title of this thread is a wee bit dramatic, don't you think?

[Svoboda]

OP should have kissed her between 60-120 minutes. You were on the dance floor with her! 5 hours is way to long to not make a move, it will seem weak to her.

[lonewolf1992]

(04-24-2017 05:21 PM)Steelex Wrote:  

Cause she was playing you like a fiddle.

Did she kiss you?

Make out with you?

Suck your dick?

No.

But you spent 5 hours entertaining her like a fucking clown, feeding her ego, probably bought her a few drinks.

There mate, there is the red pill in all its harshness and bitterness, thing is , if you had your game or smv tight, she would have been either more obvious or even tried to escalate herself, think about this, a man with a higher smv or game would have either made out with her or bang her somehow, its similar to what happens to me and some of my friends when we try to game here in columbia, girls are complete stuck up bitches and cunts to local men, whereas with the foreigners they sell themselves to be just sugar plums and the "best women" in the world.

[Windom Earle]

OP, stop being an emotional geek and start becoming emotionally resilient.

[RatInTheWoods]

Agree with other posters about taking too long to escalate.

The good thing about escalating is you get a feel for if this is going somewhere. After 30-60 mins push further, if shes out then you have saved 4.5 hours, if she's in then push further.

At least you got close to the hunt, so you are on the right track. Just need to polish your game and meet one more interested.

[EmotionalGeek]

(04-24-2017 02:47 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

Hard to say but my guess is she probably has a BF that she's neither 100% committed to or to cheating on.

Plus 5 hours is too long...especially at one venue. You should be moving this back to your place at 90 min -2hrs max if there's alcohol involved

Regarding alcohol I drank only one whiskey because I do not like to much alcohol. She drank one beer in front of me but I do not know whether she drank more before. She said yes but she did not look drunk at all.

I thought longer I game the better so I spend 5 hours with her. I wanted to make her FWB or GF not ONS. What would be proper escalation timeframe for ONS? How long until kiss and how long until taking her home?

[Steelex]

Well that's where you fucked up my friend.

The first step to make her anything you want is to fuck the shit out of her. She's not gonna be a fwb if you can't lay some pipe.

Get her back to your place ASAP and smash.

[Dkby]

(04-25-2017 04:23 AM)EmotionalGeek Wrote:  

I thought longer I game the better so I spend 5 hours with her. I wanted to make her FWB or GF not ONS. What would be proper escalation timeframe for ONS? How long until kiss and how long until taking her home?

ASAP is the answer to the both questions. When you are out, the only focus is about getting her to bed, not thinking about the future. You will have time for that when you wake up.

[Robtormar]

You answered your own questions. Poor eye contact is a vagina drier my friend

[General Stalin]

Spent too long with her stalling escalation. You need to push forward more. You opened her. Good. You chatted a bit and built some comfort. Good. You touched her. Good. You never went further. You chatted and chatted for 5 hours which will kill the sexual vibe and put you in the friend/safe entertainment zone. You wore out your welcome.

On top of that, judging by how you talk about her, she probably could smell the oneitis coming off of you. She knows she's attractive, and could likely tell you were way too into her. Work on your abundance mentality. Talk to more girls when you go to clubs/bars. Never spend too long with one woman or she will grow tired of you. If you can't get her out of the club or into the bathroom then get her number and move on.

[captain_shane]

Another thing I haven't seen mentioned is getting the number. I would never recommend getting the number at the end of a conversation, it puts too much pressure on the situation. Try and get the number earlier in the conversation.

[brick tamland]

5 hours is too much of yourself (what you have to offer) given away, for no reward.
try to see things their way - the power dynamic changes when she realises a stranger is enamoured enough to use up the prime hours on a night out on her only. That tells her you have limited options. that leads to awkward situations like you following her, being led. That leads to rejection (no replies).
You took her way too seriously. There were other 8s and 9s that night. You made this chick too big an item on your horizon, thus odds started mounting against you. Once you understand women better you'll hardly blame her.