[Rob Banks]

(01-05-2017 06:19 AM)chakalaka Wrote:  

(01-05-2017 06:09 AM)kiwi12 Wrote:  

^^^ So which previously banned member are you?

This idiot spends 18k in a summer trip financed by his father and now wants to sue him for 17K. Giving info of personal familly matters to strangers lawyers, policemans, etc.

I´ve changed usernames before the meetings. Since I knew it was a wrong decision from Roosh. And it would put the membership of the forum in jeopardy. Like it did.

But if you want to know it was God.

Never spent 18k on a summer trip (it was more like 7 or 8k). The rest of the debt is from my dad paying for school and various other expenses over the years.

I never gave my dad's information (or mine, for that matter) to any cops or lawyers. I happen to agree with you that it's fucked up to get the police or the law involved in family matters, as I pointed out here. I don't know why you're assuming I gave out any names or info when I consulted with the lawyer and the police.

Keep on calling me an idiot, a drama queen, a cunt, and whatever else you want. I won't be responding to your posts anymore.

And while you're at it, keep shit-talking Roosh as well. That should go over well for you.

[chakalaka]

(01-05-2017 06:28 AM)Rob Banks Wrote:  

(01-05-2017 06:19 AM)chakalaka Wrote:  

(01-05-2017 06:09 AM)kiwi12 Wrote:  

^^^ So which previously banned member are you?

This idiot spends 18k in a summer trip financed by his father and now wants to sue him for 17K. Giving info of personal familly matters to strangers lawyers, policemans, etc.

I´ve changed usernames before the meetings. Since I knew it was a wrong decision from Roosh. And it would put the membership of the forum in jeopardy. Like it did.

But if you want to know it was God.

Never spent 18k on a summer trip (it was more like 7 or 8k). The rest of the debt is from my dad paying for school and various other expenses over the years.

I never gave my dad's information (or mine, for that matter) to any cops or lawyers. I happen to agree with you that it's fucked up to get the police or the law involved in family matters, as I pointed out here. I don't know why you're assuming I gave out any names or info when I consulted with the lawyer and the police.

Keep on calling me an idiot, a drama queen, a cunt, and whatever else you want. I won't be responding to your posts anymore.

And while you're at it, keep shit-talking Roosh as well. That should go over well for you.

Stop lying and bullshitting. What if it was 7-8k. It was spent. And now you want to sue the person which puts a roof over you head and gives you food for 17k? You spent 8k in a summer trip in Europe and now need money? How is that? Explain me. I want to learn with you.

Your have a woman´s mentality. But you come to the wrong place.

How do you make an appointment with a lawyer without giving your name.
You should work on sales.

About Roosh I´m not shitposting him. It´s true this forum started for him not to answer so many emails. Roosh has shortfalls but his merit surpasses it immensely. Again manipulating. And now since your were called out your asking for some protection. Just like a woman. Again. There´s no white knights here.

[Rob Banks]

(01-04-2017 09:45 PM)scorpion Wrote:  

Rob Banks, you need to grow up. You've got a rationalization and an excuse for everything. Enough. It's time to take responsibility for yourself as a man. You keep referring to "your money", but as others have pointed out, it's not money that you earned. You need to stop fucking around. The best advice I can give you? Pretend like that money doesn't even exist. Move out and start busting your ass to EARN some money of your own. Then you will have YOUR money.

Life is not a fucking game and it's not easy. Nobody owes you a damn thing. That's the real lesson you need to learn here. The $18k in bonds is entirely immaterial. You need to address these character flaws that are holding you back or you will continue to screw up your life with bad decision making. It doesn't matter what you or your dad did in the past. That's over and there's nothing you can do about it. Now it's time for you to move forward as a man and take sole responsibility for your life. You're 25 years old, not 15. You don't need daddy or grandma's money. What you need is a fire lit under your ass and some tough love, and that's exactly what the forum gave you in this thread. You would be wise to put the excuses, rationalizations and explanations aside for once and reflect on that.

Ultimately, you don't owe anyone here an explanation. It's that man you see in the mirror who you are accountable to every day. Your actions alone determine whether you can look that man in the eye with pride or if you turn away in shame. And I will say flat out: the path you are on right now is a shameful one. If you aren't ashamed then you should be. You need to make a change and you need to do it now, or else you will be in the same spot 10 years from now as a 35 year old with nothing going for him, a bad attitude and a list of excuses and rationalizations a mile long.

I can tell from your posts that you're a smart and thoughtful guy, Rob Banks. You should be doing much better than this. I can tell that you have a lot more in you, a lot of untapped potential that you're wasting. Just put that big brain of yours to work on proactive solutions for your life rather than on rationalizing your mistakes and bad decisions and you will be amazed how quickly things will turn around for you.

You're right. I don't need the 18k. It's just that without it, I will be stuck living at home until I can save up a grand or two to be able to move out. I figured if I have the opportunity to do it now, why not do it?

Maybe after I take the money, I'll spend a grand or two to move out, and as soon as I am working full time, I will give the rest back to my dad to hold on to. I have no problem doing that, and he would probably be happy if I did that. I don't need the entire 18k right now.

Look, I just want to get out of my dad's house and leave NYC. That's my main goal. And one of the reasons why I want to do that is so that I can start to fix my relationship with my dad (which isn't going to happen while we're living under the same roof). Me being 25 and living under his roof is just going to cause too much resentment (from him towards me), and he isn't afraid to express this resentment very openly. Everyone is telling me to "fix" my relationship with him, and that isn't going to happen if I don't get out of his house.

I appreciate the advice.

[Rob Banks]

(01-05-2017 06:37 AM)chakalaka Wrote:  

Stop lying and bullshitting. What if it was 7-8k. It was spent. And now you want to sue the person which puts a roof over you head and gives you food for 17k? You spent 8k in a summer trip in Europe and now need money? How is that? Explain me. I want to learn with you.

Your have a woman´s mentality. But you come to the wrong place.

How do you make an appointment with a lawyer without giving your name. Please indulge since I used to be one.

You should work on sales.

About Roosh I´m not shitposting him. It´s true this forum started for him not to answer so many emails. Roosh has shortfalls but his merit surpasses it immensely. Again manipulating. And now since your were called out your asking for some protection. Just like a woman. Again.

It was a phone consultation with the attorney. On second thought, I might have given him my name, but that's it. I didn't give him any of my dad's info.

As for the trip to Europe, it was pre-determined that I would be using the bonds to pay for the trip. My dad fronted me the money because he didn't want to give me the bonds directly.

Now, unless you want to have a respectful discussion, I'm done responding to you.

Go ahead and tell me how it's "womanly" to ask for a respectful discussion.

[chakalaka]

(01-05-2017 06:44 AM)Rob Banks Wrote:  

(01-05-2017 06:37 AM)chakalaka Wrote:  

Stop lying and bullshitting. What if it was 7-8k. It was spent. And now you want to sue the person which puts a roof over you head and gives you food for 17k? You spent 8k in a summer trip in Europe and now need money? How is that? Explain me. I want to learn with you.

Your have a woman´s mentality. But you come to the wrong place.

How do you make an appointment with a lawyer without giving your name. Please indulge since I used to be one.

You should work on sales.

About Roosh I´m not shitposting him. It´s true this forum started for him not to answer so many emails. Roosh has shortfalls but his merit surpasses it immensely. Again manipulating. And now since your were called out your asking for some protection. Just like a woman. Again.

It was a phone consultation with the attorney. On second thought, I might have given him my name, but that's it. I didn't give him any of my dad's info.

As for the trip to Europe, it was pre-determined that I would be using the bonds to pay for the trip. My dad fronted me the money because he didn't want to give me the bonds directly.

Now, unless you want to have a respectful discussion, I'm done responding to you.

Go ahead and tell me how it's "womanly" to ask for a respectful discussion.

From your name I can get your father name. A lawyer has contacts in every department. Tax, banks, DMV, etc, etc. And BTW because your an idiot if one day you hire a lawyer he will rip you off.

It´s not respectful because your lying. And manipulating facts. There´s a lot of ways to be disrespectful. Respect is telling the truth.

Come on man. You say your mom has two apartments. Spend pre-determined 9k in summer trips. Your family pays for your tuition. You don´t even have to pay a loan. Your a privileged idiot. Who wants to suffer. If I were your father I would let you suffer. Maybe it´s what´s missing in your life. For me your just craving for your dad attention (and some sort of revenge). And you will go to any lenghts to get it. Don´t do it. This is not the way.

[Rob Banks]

[quote] (01-04-2017 08:50 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

Haven't been on in ages and look, I get a late Christmas present. A weak entitled male unwilling to pay the price for his mistakes posting as if he is the victim. Talking as if he knows what side is up. As if he is now a changed man.

It boils down to this, you have demonstrated that you are a waste of a human being with a history of terrible decision making.

You say you could get a job to pay for the car and everything else. Then just do that, the only reason you want your money is because you know you can't do it. You know if you had to stand on your own two feet, you would fail. But you talk a big game.[/quote]

Yeah, except I have done that before. I moved out before and worked two jobs for a year and a half, and I didn't "fail," as you are saying.

When I moved out, I did have to borrow about $1500 from my family to pay for food and rent until I got my first paycheck. If my dad wants to offer me that again, then I won't need the 17k. The whole entire reason I'm even considering this is because I have tried to sit down and talk to my dad many, many times about this, and he won't even discuss it with me.

[quote] (01-04-2017 08:50 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

H1N1 has posted some extremely solid advice and observations. As have many others. You should take it to heart. And never demand advice be of a "constructive nature" - if someone on the forum has taken the time to read your posts and post a comment that they believe is helpful, then you take it and don't bitch about it.[/quote]

You're right. I shouldn't be bitching about any of the responses, and I do appreciate you and everyone else taking the time to read my posts.

Surely, though, you can understand that it is difficult to be appreciative grateful when someone writes a post telling me that I am a disrespectful asshole, a spoiled child, and a worthless human being, and offers no constructive advice. I guess I should just ignore those types of responses, but it isn't the easiest thing to do.

[quote] (01-04-2017 08:50 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

Maybe your father knows he could have been a better father and is just trying to keep you from fucking up even more. It sounds like your family is broken and not all because of your father. You wrote something about South America. Maybe it is the money side of the family that fucked you up because they made life too easy on you (you wrote as if they would help you out - so I imagine they have at various times).

You seem to have no gratitude. That is a fatal flaw in building relationships. Among the strongest male friendships I have been in (and witnessed) gratitude and loyalty (I don't sense you are strong here either) play a major role.

You are young, you have no experience, you don't make good decisions, but on this matter about the bonds you will make the smart choice?

No, I don't think I alone will make a smart choice. That's why I've spent months talking it over with my girl and close friends of mine, and why I decided to post about it on here.

The only thing I have complained about are the insults and personal attacks I am receiving from some people. Any actual advice about what to do in this situation (like the advice you are giving me) is totally welcome.

[quote='samsamsam' pid='1478554' dateline='1483581014']
There will be a day when your father is gone and you will regret much of what you have done to him. You may not like his choices, but few parents actually think "hey how do I fuck up my child?" They do the best they can, maybe it isn't good enough in your opinion, but they are trying because they give a shit. Don't gripe about someone who cares and is trying to help you. That means they care, it is when they stop giving you advice and trying to be involved in your life, that they don't.

Man up, pay your father back and let the rest of it sit there. Or strike a deal and ask for a few grand but not all. Then work as you say you will and DEMONSTRATE that you have your shit together. Then you will earn his trust. You gripe that he is too blue pill and that he made you who you are. You are on a forum of men that strive to be red pill. The red pill move in your situation is to start acting red pill.

I bet the first thing you do if you get all your money is to buy a few gifts for your girl and yourself and a big lavish dinner. You have no emotional control, which is another sign of a weak man. You know it and I know it that this money won't last.[/quote]

A few years ago, I had moved out of home and I was working two jobs to support myself. I had been doing that for about 6 months, and my dad even told me that I was doing well, he was proud of me, etc. And yet, when I asked him for a few grand out of the bonds, he said absolutely not.

There is no negotiating with him about it.

Actually, the only way for me to negotiate with him would be to first take them. Once I have them in my hands, then he would be willing to negotiate. Maybe he lets me keep a few grand to move out, and I let him hold on to the rest. I would be willing to agree to that.

[quote] (01-04-2017 08:50 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

You didn't earn the money, legally it is yours. But if you actually earned that much money you would know the struggle, the sweat, the pain, the blood that took to get it.[/quote]

Yes, of course I didn't earn the money. When I said it was "my money," I only meant legally.

[quote] (01-04-2017 08:50 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

You live in fear/scarcity or else you wouldn't think that a sickly woman would be the ideal wife for you at 25. That wreaks of desperate energy.[/quote]

Ok, these comments about my girl are starting to annoy me a little. Obviously, I understand that physical health is very important. However, what do you recommend I do in this situation? I have been with this girl for almost 10 years, since she was 16 or 17. We have been planning a life together for a long time. Nobody else in her family has any serious medical problems. She is actually doing quite well in terms of her medical problem. There have not been any serious problems since she got the transplant back in 2008. She also has a very good attitude and takes care of herself very well. She comes from a good family and has good values and beliefs. Seriously, what am I supposed to do? Should I call her up out of the blue and tell her I'm leaving her because of the medical condition (after almost 10 years together)?

These are serious questions. I want to know what you think I should do. Sure, maybe I should have taken her medical condition more seriously back when I met her, but it seems like it's a done deal now. I made my decision. Dumping your wife of 10 years out of the blue like that doesn't seem like a decision a responsible man would make.

[quote] (01-04-2017 08:50 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

In your heart, you know you need to suck it up and deal with some pain and pay the price for all your bad decisions, but I sense you are too much of a pussy to do it. But you just want the easy out. What happens when that money is gone? Because I guarantee that you will piss it away.[/quote]

This is where I disagree. I don't think I should have such little confidence in myself that I decline to take opportunities out of fear that I will fuck up.

Now, I'm not saying that this bond situation is the best opportunity for me. If you're saying I shouldn't do it because it's not that much money and it isn't worth wrecking my relationship with my dad over, I can understand and respect that.

All I'm saying is that I don't think it is best for me to have an attitude of "I'm not going to take this opportunity because I'm just going to fuck up and piss the money away." That seems like a defeatist attitude. It's one thing to acknowledge your past mistakes and take steps to avoid repeating them, but it's another thing to have no confidence in yourself whatsoever and to believe you are doomed to always repeat the same mistakes.

[quote] (01-04-2017 08:50 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

Now back to my hibernation.

P.S. If you only came with some humility, maybe the the responses would be less aggressive. You are not that great, you have not accomplished anything, and yet you have no humility.

There are countless members on this forum, who are world beaters, who have done amazing things. From serving in the military, to multi-millionaires, to people who have got their shit together and living abroad. And these great men have so much humility. Some of these guys could kill others quickly, but they are so articulate and they are in control of themselves. And then there is you.

But I want you to do well in life. I want that for everyone, especially the men on this forum. And your success doesn't hurt me, why wouldn't I want you to be successful? But the path you are headed, isn't the path to success. And yet, you can't see it. I don't know why you bothered posting, just do what you want to do, basically it just seems you wanted a lot of attention like a girl.[/quote]

You're wrong. I don't just want attention. I actually somewhat regret starting this thread, given some of the responses I have gotten.

Just because I have resentment and anger towards my father (for what I believe to be good reasons) doesn't mean I am full of myself or I think I am great or anything like that. Obviously, I'm young and I haven't accomplished shit in my life. I don't think I'm better than anyone here.

[quote] (01-04-2017 08:50 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

And I bet there are guys whose fathers have "done worse" to them who wished they would have fought to try and improve their relationships with their fathers. Family matters. Honestly, you mentioned that you wanted children. Do you honestly think you have your shit together to have kids?

If this was rough, it was intentional, seems like you have been coddled much of your life.[/quote]

I don't mind the "rough" responses. I appreciate your advice and I don't think it was too rough or anything.

No, I don't think that I "have my shit together" to have kids, but I also don't believe I should have a defeatist attitude about it. If I were to wait until I had a college degree, a good job, and a house before I had kids, then my girl would be 35 by that point, and I would end up with deep regrets for the rest of my life.

And yes, I suppose I could dump (or rather, divorce) my girl, focus on getting my life together, and then look for a new girl later on, but that is just too big a change for me at this point. I don't think I'm willing to do something that drastic. It seems a bit reckless (not to mention fucked up) to me.

[Black Knight]

OP-

The way I see it you have 3 problems:

1) The money you owe your dad
2) The relationship with your dad that you supposedly want to improve
3) The bonds that you want to cash to use for your own personal ends

As you've mentioned above, you can solve #3 by force, but it will prevent you from accomplishing #2, potentially forever.

The first thing to do is to pay your father the money you owe him. Full stop. How he's treated you is completely orthogonal to the situation. Approach your dad with some humility, tell him that you realize that you owe him a considerable amount of money and agree to go sign out the 18k you owe him. Regardless of the other two problems, this is one that needs to be solved first.

After doing this, you need to come up with a plan for how to rebuild your life independent of the remaining 17K. I understand that's a decent chunk of startup cash, but in the long run it is really not very much money. If not getting it immediately is going to prevent you from making drastic improvements in your life, I'd wager that you probably weren't going to have the willpower/work ethic to make those changes anyway.

Once you are well into executing your plan, then you approach him about taking out the rest of your bond money. If he says no still, you can consider other options. But forcing him to give you that money at the point of a gun is going to prevent any sort of repair to the relationship, potentially cost you quite a bit in headaches/legal fees, and honestly probably won't solve the problems in your life nearly as much as you think it will.

Pay him first, work on yourself, and worry about the bond money at a later date.

[sterling_archer]

^OP, I think this is excellent advice.

[Rob Banks]

UPDATE: After considering what everyone has told me here, and talking it over with friends, I am having serious doubts about whether or not to go through with my original plan.

My main concern is that I don't want my dad to remain in complete control of the money, because he probably won't let me touch it until I'm in my 30s. However, it is obviously not ideal for me to take the money and go off on my own. That would be too reckless at this point. I think I probably already knew that subconsciously, which is why I made this thread in the first place.

My dad wants to go to the bank tomorrow (Friday) for me to sign the bonds over. What I will probably do is try and talk to him and work out a deal. I will tell him that I'll gladly sign over the 18k, but that I want to work out a deal for what will be done with the remaining bonds. As long as he agrees to give me $1000-1500 to leave town with at the end of January and to use the rest to pay for college tuition, then that's all I really need and I will gladly sign over his 18k immediately.

On the off chance that he completely refuses to negotiate any sort of deal and insists that I keep living with him indefinitely, then I may have to take the money at that point. However, as soon as he realizes I'm serious and not bluffing, I'm almost positive that he will be willing to work something out with me.

In any case, I am not planning to actually take that money and keep it. I might let my dad think I am willing to keep it (so that he will be willing to work out a deal with me) but I'm not actually going to keep it.

Thank you to everyone who took the time to respond. I will let you know what happens tomorrow.

[SamuelBRoberts]

(01-06-2017 03:18 AM)Rob Banks Wrote:  

UPDATE: After considering what everyone has told me here, and talking it over with friends, I am having serious doubts about whether or not to go through with my original plan.

My main concern is that I don't want my dad to remain in complete control of the money, because he probably won't let me touch it until I'm in my 30s. However, it is obviously not ideal for me to take the money and go off on my own. That would be too reckless at this point. I think I probably already knew that subconsciously, which is why I made this thread in the first place.

My dad wants to go to the bank tomorrow (Friday) for me to sign the bonds over. What I will probably do is try and talk to him and work out a deal. I will tell him that I'll gladly sign over the 18k, but that I want to work out a deal for what will be done with the remaining bonds. As long as he agrees to give me $1000-1500 to leave town with at the end of January and to use the rest to pay for college tuition, then that's all I really need and I will gladly sign over his 18k immediately.

On the off chance that he completely refuses to negotiate any sort of deal and insists that I keep living with him indefinitely, then I may have to take the money at that point. However, as soon as he realizes I'm serious and not bluffing, I'm almost positive that he will be willing to work something out with me.

In any case, I am not planning to actually take that money and keep it. I might let my dad think I am willing to keep it (so that he will be willing to work out a deal with me) but I'm not actually going to keep it.

Thank you to everyone who took the time to respond. I will let you know what happens tomorrow.

I'm glad you're realizing that maybe your initial plan wasn't great.
But you owe him that 18k regardless of what he says. That's not "leverage" you have. It's a debt you owe. Pay it.

[Rob Banks]

(01-06-2017 03:24 AM)SamuelBRoberts Wrote:  

I'm glad you're realizing that maybe your initial plan wasn't great.
But you owe him that 18k regardless of what he says. That's not "leverage" you have. It's a debt you owe. Pay it.

Of course. I'm going to pay him no matter what. Even if I were to take my portion of the money and leave (which I'm not planning to do), I was still going to pay him what I owed him.

[RatInTheWoods]

The rats wise council:

Tell dad you will happily sign over the $18K and thank him very much for loaning you that to enjoy an epic holiday.

Give yourself an uppercut for thinking about screwing dad over for "your money" because its your grandma's money that she trusted dad to wisely keep to ensure it was used to better you and not get pissed away.

Thank your dad for all he has done for you, despite the conflict you have had in the past.

Get a job, earn your way in life and move out ASAP

If and when you genuinely are going to use that money for education as Grandma dictated, then tell dad then and access the cash.

Good luck, and always hold your values above grubby money.

You might have had a bad relationship with your dad, we all have as young men, but later in life you will understand what its like to be a dad, and have a young son who has made bad choices, and what that frustration feels like.

[CleanSlate]

Update?

[Rocha]

Rob, I just hope you banged a lot with those 18k.

I have some sympathy for you, since I have done many errors in my 20s...I woke up when I was 23...then I slipped again around 26...I woke up for good at 28.

Get a job and do it like you are a Spetsnaz, Navy SEAL, or Commando on a mission to recover your lost years.

[PainPositive]

Dad,

First I want to thank you for everything you've done for me even though I don't deserve it. Letting me stay in your house and constantly trying to stop me from ruining my life with drugs, irresponsible spending, and poor relationship choices probably hasn't been easy for you and I'm sorry you had to put up with it. I know it might sound strange coming from me but I appreciate everything you've done.

I know I haven't done fuck all with my life up to this point and I'm embarrassed and ashamed by it. It's hard for me to see the right path to take because I'm still young, dumb and really bad at taking good advice. I'm off to a bad start I know but I really want to change my life for the better and prove to you (and to myself) that I'm capable of being a responsible adult.

To do that I need to ask you for a favor. Can I borrow $2000 from the money Grandma gave you for my college fund *after* I pay you back the money I owe you? I need it so I can move out of the city and get into an apartment with my wife while I work and go to night classes.

I know you want me to stay with you because it's the smart thing to do financially but I think it will be better for the both of us if I move out since we don't get along and you probably don't like having me live in your house for free anyway. (Add some apologies about the fowl habits you have that must annoy the fuck out of him.)

Whatever you decide I'll accept without complaints or bitching. If you decide not to let me borrow the money I understand and I'll just have to get a job and save up and move after.

If you do decide to let me borrow it just bring two extra bonds with you to the bank tomorrow and after I sign yours over to you I'll keep the other two.

I know I haven't been greatful to you but I recently realized that I'm lucky to have had you around to help me out. All the money and advice you've given me is a lot more than most other people get and I've been ungrateful for it. I'm sorry for that.

Things have been rough the last few years but I'm hoping that will change once I get my shit together. Sorry again for all the screw ups and thanks again for all the help.

-Rob

[Rob Banks]

Update:

I didn't take the money. I went with my dad to the bank to pay him his debt, and I told him that I would be happy to sign over his money but that first we had to reach an agreement as to what to do with the leftover bonds. I told him that he could either give them to me, or he could give them to another family member to hold, or he could let me use them to pay off my car, pay for school, and use them to leave town (for living expenses and first-month's rent until I find full-time work). He eventually agreed to let me use the money for these purposes, so I went to the bank with him to sign over his money.

Also, it turned out there was less money there than I thought (the bonds were not fully matured), so after paying my dad the debt, there was only around 10k or so left. I'm glad I didn't end up doing anything reckless like trying to run off with the money.

Thank you to everyone who took the time to read my post and give me advice.

[Serious Sam]

It's nice to see that some of the wisdom that you argued virulently against seeped in. There are a lot of people here with a lot more life experience than you, who have also had to go to their parents, bosses, etc with news they didn't want to hear. And, just as your dad responded reasonably, those peoples' responses also took us by surprise. Most of the negative feelings and expected responses were built up in your mind. You truly believed that your only choice was to take the money and run, involve the state, and possibly sue your dad. It turns out that wasn't the case. Give your dad some credit. He isn't some comic book villain trying to thwart every choice you make.

I do have one question though:

1) Are you stilling planning to move out, pay your car off, etc, foregoing the extra $7k those bonds will accrue over time?

[Sonoma]

Awesome, I'm glad things worked out

[kaotic]

Alot of tough love and heavy criticism.

Rob saw through his own hamstering and realized what he was doing.

Glad to see the correct outcome happened, I'm sure you've gained some respect in your father's eyes.

[Rob Banks]

(01-09-2017 03:45 PM)Serious Sam Wrote:  

1) Are you stilling planning to move out, pay your car off, etc, foregoing the extra $7k those bonds will accrue over time?

I'm not too worried about the extra money they will accrue over time. They won't be fully matured for another 10-15 years (if I remember correctly), and by that point, I should have enough money to my name that I'm not worried about 7k (if I'm still broke in 10-15 years, I've got bigger things to worry about than 7k worth of bonds).

I plan to calculate how much money I will need for school, and if there is any money left over after that, I'll probably use it to pay off my car and/or use it for a few weeks worth of living expenses when I move out.

[samsamsam]

(01-10-2017 03:25 PM)Rob Banks Wrote:  

(01-09-2017 03:45 PM)Serious Sam Wrote:  

1) Are you stilling planning to move out, pay your car off, etc, foregoing the extra $7k those bonds will accrue over time?

I'm not too worried about the extra money they will accrue over time. They won't be fully matured for another 10-15 years (if I remember correctly), and by that point, I should have enough money to my name that I'm not worried about 7k (if I'm still broke in 10-15 years, I've got bigger things to worry about than 7k worth of bonds).

I plan to calculate how much money I will need for school, and if there is any money left over after that, I'll probably use it to pay off my car and/or use it for a few weeks worth of living expenses when I move out.

So these bonds have not matured yet? So you signed over bonds that have not matured yet, and I imagine they are at low interest rates? You're father did you the favor taking those terms. Granted they are risk free, but it sounds like he has to wait a few more clears to collect on them. Unless he wants a haircut.

Let me ask you this, did you have any friends give you the tough, honest and proper advice that the members of this forum gave to you? If you don't, then you need to find new friends. You will not improve as a man, keeping friends who are just like you around you.

I don't want to make it seem like I am pounding on you for fun, it seems you have reached a state of acceptance/peaceful resolution. A reflective mood. This is the best time to give you more advice, when you are not in the mood to fight/argue as earlier in this thread.

It seems like you may have learned something that all men need to know. When coming from a place of reason and dialogue most things can be worked out. It is only when a person is coming in guns blazing (and thinking of calling the cops - I doubt they would have come honestly) that you escalate and make it much more difficult to resolve something. Some people may scare with guns blazing, but I don't sense your father would have cared. Saved the guns blazing for when you are in a situation when you have tried other approaches.

On a side note, have you considered a gold membership? It would be a cheap way to thank Roosh that this forum exists and you were able to get some honest feedback.

Good luck in your journey.

[Rob Banks]

(01-10-2017 04:03 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

So these bonds have not matured yet? So you signed over bonds that have not matured yet, and I imagine they are at low interest rates? You're father did you the favor taking those terms. Granted they are risk free, but it sounds like he has to wait a few more clears to collect on them. Unless he wants a haircut.

They have not matured, but I had to sign over enough so that he would get all the money I owed him. Each of the $1000 bonds is currently worth around $700-800, so I had to sign over enough to where they would add up to 18k.

(01-10-2017 04:03 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

Let me ask you this, did you have any friends give you the tough, honest and proper advice that the members of this forum gave to you? If you don't, then you need to find new friends. You will not improve as a man, keeping friends who are just like you around you.

Not really, actually. One of my best friends was telling me I should keep the money, but the fact that he knows my dad personally and isn't too fond of him probably has something to do with it. Another one of my best friends initially supported the idea, but when I told him what people on the forum had told me, he seemed to agree that it would be extremely disrespectful towards my dad if I ran off with the money. He said something to the effect of "Of course it would be disrespectful towards your dad. The only reason me and (the other friend) advised you to take the money is because we figured you had no respect for your dad in the first place, and that your relationship with him was already broken."

My girl (who I mentioned earlier in the thread) and a few of my close family members advised me against keeping the money.

(01-10-2017 04:03 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

I don't want to make it seem like I am pounding on you for fun, it seems you have reached a state of acceptance/peaceful resolution. A reflective mood. This is the best time to give you more advice, when you are not in the mood to fight/argue as earlier in this thread.

It seems like you may have learned something that all men need to know. When coming from a place of reason and dialogue most things can be worked out. It is only when a person is coming in guns blazing (and thinking of calling the cops - I doubt they would have come honestly) that you escalate and make it much more difficult to resolve something. Some people may scare with guns blazing, but I don't sense your father would have cared. Saved the guns blazing for when you are in a situation when you have tried other approaches.

Yeah, my dad was actually a lot more reasonable than I expected (based on my past experiences with him). I was pleasently surprised. I probably wouldn't have considered doing all that bullshit (getting cops involved, running off with the money) if I had known he would be so reasonable.

(01-10-2017 04:03 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

On a side note, have you considered a gold membership? It would be a cheap way to thank Roosh that this forum exists and you were able to get some honest feedback.

Right now, I literally have zero money (which is why I was so desperate for a few bucks to leave town with). As soon as I'm working again, I will certainly be donating to Roosh and other bloggers/Youtubers who I follow.

(01-10-2017 04:03 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

Good luck in your journey.

Thank you for the advice.

[RoastBeefCurtains4Me]

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