Hey guys,
here is a question about something that happens to me on a regular basis and is fucking annoying:
I'm not sure what to call it, but I will try to explain it:
When I start "going" for a girl - I decide to push it, I have an agenda to pick her up and not just hanging out for her - I guess I become too tense / intense / self aware or something, but instead of attracting the girl to me I kind of end up doing the opposite to a level where eye contact becomes kinda broken.
This has happened tonight:
Coworker chick we rarely meet, but she clearly enjoys my sense of humor and perspective on things. We generally have a good flow, last week we met I made her laugh for like a minute or so, etc. etc. Here you just gotta trust me on this one that I can read the situation well.
We had a christmas company get together and I decided to kinda go for it.
At the beginning of the party she greeted me with a wide, open smile and eyes, but throughout the night - I started interacting more with her, some kino, etc. - my efforts resulted in setting up a wall between us.
The place where it's the easiest to capture the shift is the eye contact. Maybe I was too reckless making eye contact with her, instead of a careless, flirty joyful scene between us I managed to wreck it to the extent that making eyecontact became a problem. It was literally hard to make her look at me, there became some sort of a fucking force field. Some sort of a "bad energy".
As if I was pushing it too much (in an unskilled way), and it resulted in her.. registering it as.. a bad kind of aggression? I don't know, but I almost got a headache.
I know it's a complex issue, but does anyone have experience about this overcharged, heavy eyecontact that this interaction resulted in?
It's almost as if I'm straining my eyes now and I think she oughta feel somewhat similar.
Thanks ahead guys!
I kinda like really direct game, because there everything is super simple and when you look at a girl with a "I wanna fuck you" charge, it's clearly communicated. But when it comes to a more subtle and gradual game I'm pretty much lost.
here is a question about something that happens to me on a regular basis and is fucking annoying:
I'm not sure what to call it, but I will try to explain it:
When I start "going" for a girl - I decide to push it, I have an agenda to pick her up and not just hanging out for her - I guess I become too tense / intense / self aware or something, but instead of attracting the girl to me I kind of end up doing the opposite to a level where eye contact becomes kinda broken.
This has happened tonight:
Coworker chick we rarely meet, but she clearly enjoys my sense of humor and perspective on things. We generally have a good flow, last week we met I made her laugh for like a minute or so, etc. etc. Here you just gotta trust me on this one that I can read the situation well.
We had a christmas company get together and I decided to kinda go for it.
At the beginning of the party she greeted me with a wide, open smile and eyes, but throughout the night - I started interacting more with her, some kino, etc. - my efforts resulted in setting up a wall between us.
The place where it's the easiest to capture the shift is the eye contact. Maybe I was too reckless making eye contact with her, instead of a careless, flirty joyful scene between us I managed to wreck it to the extent that making eyecontact became a problem. It was literally hard to make her look at me, there became some sort of a fucking force field. Some sort of a "bad energy".
As if I was pushing it too much (in an unskilled way), and it resulted in her.. registering it as.. a bad kind of aggression? I don't know, but I almost got a headache.
I know it's a complex issue, but does anyone have experience about this overcharged, heavy eyecontact that this interaction resulted in?
It's almost as if I'm straining my eyes now and I think she oughta feel somewhat similar.
Thanks ahead guys!
I kinda like really direct game, because there everything is super simple and when you look at a girl with a "I wanna fuck you" charge, it's clearly communicated. But when it comes to a more subtle and gradual game I'm pretty much lost.