[Maciano]

I started over at 30, unmarried thank god.

It's not the end of the world. In fact, life has been much, much, MUCH better

[Rawmeo]

(01-27-2015 02:46 PM)NKTexas Wrote:  

I fell in love, and so did she. It didn't matter that she already had one failed marriage and a five year old son (at the time). We were so in love, and thought that love conquered all. Yeah, I'll pause for a minute while you get your barf bags out.

Chances are that, if you married her, you were actually never "red pill". But it's fine, that's what we are here for, and start gaming again!

It's a good thing that you got out of this relationship on time. Red flags:

- Cheated on you
- Lying all the time
- Single mom

You might want to look at this article:

http://judgybitch.com/2012/11/11/dating-...gle-dudes/

[VolandoVengoVolandoVoy]

(01-30-2015 06:15 AM)alex3948 Wrote:  

Chances are that, if you married her, you were actually never "red pill". But it's fine, that's what we are here for, and start gaming again!

It's a good thing that you got out of this relationship on time. Red flags:

- Cheated on you
- Lying all the time
- Single mom

You might want to look at this article:

http://judgybitch.com/2012/11/11/dating-...gle-dudes/

I think you have had a bit too much kool aid, and don't know what you are talking about.
You come across as condescending and disrespectful towards the OP.
How old are you? What have you actually done in your own life?

[Cr33pin]

35 is the new 25 man. This is possibly the best thing that could have happened to you... unless you were just happy as a clam in the perfect marriage which is seems like you were not. As far as I know you only have one shot at this life, live it well and make it full of amazing memorable experiences. Don't look at this change as something negative look it as a opportunity... and opportunities mean nothing if you don't take full advantage of them.

Best of luck brother

[heavy]

   

For RVF baptizes with knowledge; but women shall baptize you with real life experience, and you shall truly know that you are God.

For by one gender are we all baptized into manhood, whether we be naturals or nice-guys, whether we be married or single; and have been all made to bow to the sexual market.


"For John truly baptized with water; but you shall be baptized with the Holy Ghost not many days hence." - Acts 1:5

"For by one Spirit are we all baptized into one body, whether we be Jews or Gentiles, whether we be bond or free; and have been all made to drink into one Spirit." - 1 Corinthians 12:13

[CleanSlate]

Ha, yeah I'm starting to feel liberated and reborn. All these women around here... there's millions of em, and I'm going crazy horny. Next girl I lay better watch out, and call in a sick day the next morning because she won't be able to walk straight!

[Rawmeo]

(01-30-2015 06:29 AM)VolandoVengoVolandoVoy Wrote:  

(01-30-2015 06:15 AM)alex3948 Wrote:  

Chances are that, if you married her, you were actually never "red pill". But it's fine, that's what we are here for, and start gaming again!

It's a good thing that you got out of this relationship on time. Red flags:

- Cheated on you
- Lying all the time
- Single mom

You might want to look at this article:

http://judgybitch.com/2012/11/11/dating-...gle-dudes/

I think you have had a bit too much kool aid, and don't know what you are talking about.
You come across as condescending and disrespectful towards the OP.
How old are you? What have you actually done in your own life?

Mid 20's for the record. I do not mean to come as disrespectful, but rather to give insight on the situation. I mean no offence.

I simply believe that marrying a women with children is a terrible idea. There are lot of them out there, so better get better girls.

NKTexas Wrote:

Ha, yeah I'm starting to feel liberated and reborn. All these women around here... there's millions of em, and I'm going crazy horny. Next girl I lay better watch out, and call in a sick day the next morning because she won't be able to walk straight!

Glad to hear that!

[AneroidOcean]

(01-29-2015 11:16 PM)puckerman Wrote:  

The fact that you had a pre-nuptial agreement at all indicates a lack of faith that it would last. the existence of some reason and logic in the far reaches of your brain.

Fixed that for you.

Good luck, OP. You have nowhere to go but UP.

[Balkanite]

(01-30-2015 10:59 AM)Cr33pin Wrote:  

35 is the new 25 man. This is possibly the best thing that could have happened to you... unless you were just happy as a clam in the perfect marriage which is seems like you were not. As far as I know you only have one shot at this life, live it well and make it full of amazing memorable experiences. Don't look at this change as something negative look it as a opportunity... and opportunities mean nothing if you don't take full advantage of them.

Best of luck brother

I thank you for posting this video, it has helped me tremendously the past few weeks. Just got out of my first LTR with an unbalanced girl. Had a scarring and crazy breakup involving one of her family members verbally assaulting and threatening me. I think I'm going to take a trip like and go all out.

[CleanSlate]

Mini update:

The house is under contract. Full asking price, taken off the market after only 1 day! I can almost taste the FREEDOM! To you Houstonians, if you see some crazy dude dancing in the streets sometime in March or April yelling "I am free! I am free! FREEEEEEEE!!!!!" - you'll know that's me!

Seriously, the light at the end of the tunnel is starting to brighten. Being in the grips of a dead marriage, getting cheated on, and even worse - lied to, and trapped in the depths of despair is enough to drive some men to suicide, I can viscerally understand that and I would not wish it upon my worst enemies. At one point, I was on a flight for a trip and we hit some severe turbulence where everyone on the flight was anxious... except myself, where I found myself thinking "just crash the damn plane I don't care".

Now life is looking brighter and brighter each day. While I admit I am lonely, it is indeed a GOOD kind of lonely. Being married and miserable is the bad kind of lonely.

[Simeon_Strangelight]

(02-05-2015 12:03 AM)CleanSlate Wrote:  

Mini update:

The house is under contract. Full asking price, taken off the market after only 1 day! I can almost taste the FREEDOM! To you Houstonians, if you see some crazy dude dancing in the streets sometime in March or April yelling "I am free! I am free! FREEEEEEEE!!!!!" - you'll know that's me!

Seriously, the light at the end of the tunnel is starting to brighten. Being in the grips of a dead marriage, getting cheated on, and even worse - lied to, and trapped in the depths of despair is enough to drive some men to suicide, I can viscerally understand that and I would not wish it upon my worst enemies. At one point, I was on a flight for a trip and we hit some severe turbulence where everyone on the flight was anxious... except myself, where I found myself thinking "just crash the damn plane I don't care".

Now life is looking brighter and brighter each day. While I admit I am lonely, it is indeed a GOOD kind of lonely. Being married and miserable is the bad kind of lonely.

Congrats. I am happy for you. One less man in the clutches of the feminine imperative and the Blue Pill Matrix. The Red Pill perception is so much more liberating.

[FANATICAL]

Thanks for sharing OP and good luck.... We can all learn a lot from how other guys have been brought down. More guts to share that than a bang story. For me, a single mum is untouchable. She wasn't working to keep the father around or she chose a bad boy dad. Either way she is broken.

[Rawmeo]

Great stuff, congrats! Keep up updated.

[Vaun]

(02-05-2015 12:03 AM)CleanSlate Wrote:  

Now life is looking brighter and brighter each day. While I admit I am lonely, it is indeed a GOOD kind of lonely. Being married and miserable is the bad kind of lonely.

You're so much further along than 95% of recently divorced men. More than you probably know.

First off, many of these guys I witness completely let themselves go. They go into the bottle. They get extremely fat. They think they are having a good time, but they are just delaying the process.

Secondly, I see a lot of weak men suddenly run out and get exclusive girlfriends, or even worse, get married again. These men probably didnt date much before their marriage, or have been lusting over new women for so long, and dont fully understand the ramifications that giving themselves over to another women will have on their lives. For most of these beta/white knight average men, them having a women in their life is all about appearances. They continue to give their lives and money over to a woman, without ever really learning how to live for themselves. These men dont realize that with a little work on themselves, they can learn how to approach, date and sleep with a lot of woman non-exclusively, to leave him independent and living his own life.

Even worse, if these men have children, those kids get neglected, because the new and younger 5 or 6 he's all enamored with, is demanding that he gives his kids too much attention. Then he spends less time with his kids, who at this point are going through the worst point in their lives, in their most fragile state.

Still even worse is if he is so pathetic that he "falls in love" with a single mom, who demands all of his time, attention and money, away from his kids. All but leaving the kids in his first marriage without a father.

Think now about what another divorce would feel like. And magnify that pain 2X, and the effect it will have on you 2x; your finances, health, wellness, reputation, etc.

[Robert Plant]

I'm 42, had been with my ex wife for 14 years and got separated 8 months ago and divorced 5 months ago. For anyone going through this I want to tell you that there is light at the end of the tunnel. But it is really important to have a have a positive attitude.

Since my separation I have...

-Traveled to 6 foreign countries.
-Gone on a Sunday morning date that led to sex in less than 2 hours.
-Taken ecstasy with two 22 year old 7s. We caressed, touched and cuddled all night with about 2 hours in the hot tub. I didn't go for sex but it still ranks as one of the best nights of my life.
-This led to fucking one of their friends (another 7) on her 21st birthday.
-Done anal.
- Fucked a German 8 in a hostel within 2 hours of meeting.
-Swapped women in my wing man's hot tub.
-Fucked a women with augmented breasts.
-Had a hot woman beg me to cum on her face. I obliged.
-Fucked 6 new women in less than 60 days (all at least 6s)
-More than doubled my total.
-Managed to maintain a positive relationship with my ex-wife.

Having said that, I have also had some really low lows. There have been times where I missed my house, missed my old life and even missed my ex-wife even though I know our relationship was unhealthy. I have also been heartbroken and lonely, so lonely I have cried.

So yes, there are ups and downs but I want to echo what others have said. Stay positive and realize that your self worth has nothing to do with what any particular woman thinks of you. There are some things that I think have helped me through this process..

- I've kept myself looking and feeling the best I can. I exercise, I eat healthy, I meditate, I do stuff I love to do (surf, hike and travel).
- I have the best wing man on earth. He is an experienced player and extremely compassionate. I cannot emphasize enough how much his tough love has helped me through my lowest lows. It also helps that his long term relationship ended about the same time as mine.
-I have kept the masturbation and porn to a minimum. There have been times that I have spent hours watching porn but made sure I didn't cum. That is good for my game. On the other hand, when I let myself cum to porn, it kills my game.
-I go out and approach all the time but keep the drinking to a minimum (1-2 drinks on week days and up to 5 drinks over a long period of time on weekends).
-My game was really lacking 8 months ago but I have worked on improving it everyday. It's getting passable now.
-Except for doing ecstasy twice with women and a pot binge in Amsterdam, I have stayed away from drugs.
-I negotiated a settlement with my ex-wife instead of dragging things out in court. In order to make this happen, I had to sacrifice certain things like my half of the house (I got paid for it) and the nicer car. At certain times I also had to patiently listen to a bunch of bitching (if you were married you are used to this). But, I kept my pension, have a down payment for another house and didn't sacrifice years of my life on legal battles.
-Finally, I have a strict rule that I will not commit to any one women. This has lost me some lays and led to the heartbreak described above but I think it is a really important (possibly temporary) rule to follow when leaving a long term relationship.

I hope this helps people going through the process. Its not easy but stay positive and good things can come out of it.

[samsamsam]

Robert Plant. Thanks for sharing. May I ask a couple of questions? I am guessing no kids? Also, I know everyone's experience will be different, but if you could look at this objectively, over those years of marriage was there enough joy to make up for the pain of divorce? I know on this forum we don't get a ton of people who are married and raving about how great it is so there is a bit of a biased sample here but most men just think it is a bad deal.

[samsamsam]

(01-30-2015 10:59 AM)Cr33pin Wrote:  

35 is the new 25 man. This is possibly the best thing that could have happened to you... unless you were just happy as a clam in the perfect marriage which is seems like you were not. As far as I know you only have one shot at this life, live it well and make it full of amazing memorable experiences. Don't look at this change as something negative look it as a opportunity... and opportunities mean nothing if you don't take full advantage of them.

Best of luck brother

Man watching that video makes me wish I was a party drinking sort of guy. Great video.

[vinman]

(03-01-2015 12:38 PM)Robert Plant Wrote:  

I'm 42, had been with my ex wife for 14 years and got separated 8 months ago and divorced 5 months ago. For anyone going through this I want to tell you that there is light at the end of the tunnel. But it is really important to have a have a positive attitude.

Since my separation I have...

-Traveled to 6 foreign countries.
-Gone on a Sunday morning date that led to sex in less than 2 hours.
-Taken ecstasy with two 22 year old 7s. We caressed, touched and cuddled all night with about 2 hours in the hot tub. I didn't go for sex but it still ranks as one of the best nights of my life.
-This led to fucking one of their friends (another 7) on her 21st birthday.
-Done anal.
- Fucked a German 8 in a hostel within 2 hours of meeting.
-Swapped women in my wing man's hot tub.
-Fucked a women with augmented breasts.
-Had a hot woman beg me to cum on her face. I obliged.
-Fucked 6 new women in less than 60 days (all at least 6s)
-More than doubled my total.
-Managed to maintain a positive relationship with my ex-wife.

Having said that, I have also had some really low lows. There have been times where I missed my house, missed my old life and even missed my ex-wife even though I know our relationship was unhealthy. I have also been heartbroken and lonely, so lonely I have cried.

So yes, there are ups and downs but I want to echo what others have said. Stay positive and realize that your self worth has nothing to do with what any particular woman thinks of you. There are some things that I think have helped me through this process..

- I've kept myself looking and feeling the best I can. I exercise, I eat healthy, I meditate, I do stuff I love to do (surf, hike and travel).
- I have the best wing man on earth. He is an experienced player and extremely compassionate. I cannot emphasize enough how much his tough love has helped me through my lowest lows. It also helps that his long term relationship ended about the same time as mine.
-I have kept the masturbation and porn to a minimum. There have been times that I have spent hours watching porn but made sure I didn't cum. That is good for my game. On the other hand, when I let myself cum to porn, it kills my game.
-I go out and approach all the time but keep the drinking to a minimum (1-2 drinks on week days and up to 5 drinks over a long period of time on weekends).
-My game was really lacking 8 months ago but I have worked on improving it everyday. It's getting passable now.
-Except for doing ecstasy twice with women and a pot binge in Amsterdam, I have stayed away from drugs.
-I negotiated a settlement with my ex-wife instead of dragging things out in court. In order to make this happen, I had to sacrifice certain things like my half of the house (I got paid for it) and the nicer car. At certain times I also had to patiently listen to a bunch of bitching (if you were married you are used to this). But, I kept my pension, have a down payment for another house and didn't sacrifice years of my life on legal battles.
-Finally, I have a strict rule that I will not commit to any one women. This has lost me some lays and led to the heartbreak described above but I think it is a really important (possibly temporary) rule to follow when leaving a long term relationship.

I hope this helps people going through the process. Its not easy but stay positive and good things can come out of it.

Keep grinding.


EDIT
I agree with Sam.
When you feel like it give a breakdown. What woke you up? What made you decide to go Team Red? What would you do differently? How are you viewed by old friends?

[Robert Plant]

(03-01-2015 12:54 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

Robert Plant. Thanks for sharing. May I ask a couple of questions? I am guessing no kids? Also, I know everyone's experience will be different, but if you could look at this objectively, over those years of marriage was there enough joy to make up for the pain of divorce? I know on this forum we don't get a ton of people who are married and raving about how great it is so there is a bit of a biased sample here but most men just think it is a bad deal.

You are correct about no kids. That ended up being a very good thing. Your second question is hard to answer. There was joy and lots of good things about marriage to be sure but on the other hand, my ex-wife could be unbelievably bitchy at times. In a sense this was a good thing because it kept me on my toes questioning our marriage and prevented me from getting caught in the kid trap. On the other hand it made the last few years of our marriage pretty bad. So I would say I don't regret having been married but wish I had ended it about 5 years earlier.

[samsamsam]

(03-01-2015 01:19 PM)Robert Plant Wrote:  

(03-01-2015 12:54 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

Robert Plant. Thanks for sharing. May I ask a couple of questions? I am guessing no kids? Also, I know everyone's experience will be different, but if you could look at this objectively, over those years of marriage was there enough joy to make up for the pain of divorce? I know on this forum we don't get a ton of people who are married and raving about how great it is so there is a bit of a biased sample here but most men just think it is a bad deal.

You are correct about no kids. That ended up being a very good thing. Your second question is hard to answer. There was joy and lots of good things about marriage to be sure but on the other hand, my ex-wife could be unbelievably bitchy at times. In a sense this was a good thing because it kept me on my toes questioning our marriage and prevented me from getting caught in the kid trap. On the other hand it made the last few years of our marriage pretty bad. So I would say I don't regret having been married but wish I had ended it about 5 years earlier.

Thanks for sharing champ. Much appreciated.

[CRR]

I've never been married, a few LTRs, and I definitely know a few guys (including family members) who are happily married.

Common themes that I see:

1) Roles are defined. Simply put, the man gets room to be a man, likewise with the woman. The woman handles household activities, the guy handles repairs and maintenance. The guy gets to have days to do his own thing, the woman gets to meet her friends for brunch and girly shit. In the marriages where the wife stays at home, she handles all household activities. Which leads to…

2) Mutual respect. The wife isn't a constant entitled nag, and shows respect for her man, which is anathema to feminists.

And the most obvious, yet understated is:

3) The guy married a woman he's actually physically attracted to. I think a big difference between blue and red pill men is that blue pill men have internalized the feminized notion that it's a sin to have physical standards. So I think a lot of these men convince themselves that the sarcastic dumpy semi-fattie with a decent job that everyone thinks is 'perfect' for him is the girl he should marry.

A wise older relative once said to me "I love my wife. She's great. She takes care of the household, is a great mom to our kids. But do you think I would've married her if she wasn't hot when we met? Fuck that, I'm too shallow". He emphasized the word 'shallow' with pride.

Again, he shares my philosophy: Be cute, don't be fat, don't be a cunt. It's not that high a bar to clear, but we currently live in a world where a platform is given to obese women whining about being models and why tall, thin men don't like them, and where old hags are allowed to spout off about not being able to find a man their age.

Anyway, great to hear you've turned things around Robert Plant. I admire your inner fortitude. Your point about having a good wingman is underrated. I'm repping you one point, partially because of your name.

[CleanSlate]

Robert Plant, thank you for sharing. Your post is definitely one I will re-read when I get one of those low lows.

In one month since my separation, I've already banged 2 women, back to back nights. Things are definitely looking up, but it's going to be a long road until I get my game right and I'm fully recovered from the divorce.

[samsamsam]

(03-01-2015 01:53 PM)CRR Wrote:  

blue pill men have internalized the feminized notion that it's a sin to have physical standards. So I think a lot of these men convince themselves that the sarcastic dumpy semi-fattie with a decent job that everyone thinks is 'perfect' for him is the girl he should marry.

I think you are spot on and I hate to blemish this thread but this makes me point.

[philosophical_recovery]

(03-01-2015 07:30 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

(03-01-2015 01:53 PM)CRR Wrote:  

blue pill men have internalized the feminized notion that it's a sin to have physical standards. So I think a lot of these men convince themselves that the sarcastic dumpy semi-fattie with a decent job that everyone thinks is 'perfect' for him is the girl he should marry.

I think you are spot on and I hate to blemish this thread but this makes me point.
horrible photo redacted

[samsamsam]

^^ Are those real? Mesmerizing. Made me think of this scene from Bad Boys.

I would be so caught up looking at those titties while my partner was getting his ass whooped. LOL.