[Mig Picante]

(12-16-2018 01:29 PM)griffinmill Wrote:  

My bumble is a graveyard of conversations.

Chicks unable to maintain a halfway interesting conversation and it either fizzles out or they make you jump through hoops before giving the number.

I'm in the same boat. I can come up with a variety of light hearted conversation topics but it's like an interrogation, it's one sided. They just respond rather than provide any initiative and it's just boring and stale.

Texting is fucking boring.

One chick told me she doesn't want to meet up, so I slowed down and talk for another week. I've suggested we link up for a drink again.... now no response.

Blonde chick 10 years younger than me, so I am happy to grind for it but there is a limit. For all i know she could be socially retarded and this whole thing could be a waste of my precious little free time.

[questor70]

(12-28-2018 08:19 PM)Mig Picante Wrote:  

One chick told me she doesn't want to meet up, so I slowed down and talk for another week. I've suggested we link up for a drink again.... now no response.

I just had another one of these sorts of situations. She actually gave me her number fairly early on but then bailed on meeting up last Saturday. Had to wait for Christmas to be over then she starts texting me...back on Bumble? WTF? We're going back to Bumble? I already got waved off last weekend so my feeling is the burden is on her to prove she's even interested but she didn't respond to my last Bumble text so I unmatched her and deleted her number.

Persistence (although risking looking thirsty) might help in situations like this but the women I'm matching with are simply not high value enough for me to fight tooth and nail to see them. I will get excited about them if and only if they show some reciprocity. Not going to feed their entitlement-mentality before I even know anything about them or whether there is any face-to-face chemistry.

I'm telling you women ABUSE these apps by matching on POOLS of men and then filing most of them into Plan B/C/D orbiter status. Any man with any self respect should bail once they know they're in this boat.

I just ghost these women on the way out but if this one does text me out of the blue I will tell her she missed the boat.

Rule of thumb with these apps is if you match you MUST meetup within the first weekend, otherwise she's just not that interested. I don't care how genuinely busy she is. She can at least fit in an icebreaker if she really wants to.

[jalke63]

Is Bumble even more biased than Tinder for race?

I created a white male model profile, and he got over 50+ likes in maybe like 30-60 minutes.

I created a minority male model profile, and he only got 15 likes in 24 hours. WTF. It barely did better than my own???

[Sourcecode]

All Apps that use an algorithm to rank people are race biased.

https://theblog.okcupid.com/race-and-att...7dcbb4f060

This should probably get posted much more often.


Of course Asian men don't have the best rep for being masculine.. But its the opposite for black men.
Despite that fact that people claim up and down to not be focused on races.
Black and Asian men get less responses.

If and app has an algorithm that pushes members down for being swiped on less.. black and asian men are gonna get less priority.

[jalke63]

Yeah it is what is. Minorities always going to get less attention. I'm just surprised there was that much of a difference with Tinder and Bumble.

Like minority male mode got like 50-70 matches on Tinder in 24 hours so was at least decent on there. It seems like there is higher quality on Bumble if you're white AND have good pictures, than Tinder though. Otherwise it seems Bumble is harder than Tinder. Interesting differences.

[Crash_Bandicoot]

(12-27-2018 11:15 PM)Delta Wrote:  

(12-24-2018 10:42 PM)Crash_Bandicoot Wrote:  

NYC peep here.

I do decently well on Bumble (15-20 matches a day - - - half are 6's and below, the other half are 7's and 7.5's).

The changed that I made to my profile to get more matches was exaggerating my height (I'm 5'10'' but put 6 feet), putting pictures of me where I looked tall and jacked and where my skin looked lighter than it really is (I'm Indian-American and am light-brown skin tone), and made my profile really full of bullet points of interesting shit I've done in the past (traveled to south america, can dance salsa, risk taker, etc)

I will admit though that none of my matches are the really hot NYC women. None of my friends match with them either. I wonder who is matching and banging the 8's and above on these online dating sites

EDIT

So you're saying you get ~7-10 matches a day with 7's and above?? Dude that is absurd. I need to pick your brain.

1. How good-looking are you? Have you ever tested out your pics on Photofeeler?
2. Do you count girls who match but never start a convo as matches?
3. Have you tried anywhere other than NYC? If so how did your results compare?

Haha yeah online dating sucks. I much more prefer meeting women in-person. It has drained me hard because it just takes a lot of time. Keep in mind that I live in NYC though - which is WAY different than any other American city.

1. In reality I'm just an average looking dude. I also have brown skin (I'm Indian American) and being a minority on online dating sucks. My pics, though, are the photos where I look way better than I actually am (posing and shit). I have some really old photos of myself from a few years ago that I keep on there just because it makes me look badass and really attractive.

I realize that women don't care about a guy's career, abilities, or any of that shit - I stack my profile with lots of interesting, and fun details that will allow her to start a conversation. Realize that online game is all about PERCEPTION of who you are - not who you actually are. It's crazy, I know, but that's just how it works.

2. I would say 50% start a convo with me.

3. My results outside of NYC are drastically worse. NYC is the best dating market for me.

I've been with lots of 5's, 6's, and 7's on Bumble but that's about it. The reality is that I do way better in terms of quality for night game. It's ridiculously hard to get the 7's, 8's, and 9's from online and that's why I'm wondering who the hell gets with them.

[pancakemouse]

(12-30-2018 09:32 PM)Crash_Bandicoot Wrote:  

(12-27-2018 11:15 PM)Delta Wrote:  

(12-24-2018 10:42 PM)Crash_Bandicoot Wrote:  

NYC peep here.

I do decently well on Bumble (15-20 matches a day - - - half are 6's and below, the other half are 7's and 7.5's).

The changed that I made to my profile to get more matches was exaggerating my height (I'm 5'10'' but put 6 feet), putting pictures of me where I looked tall and jacked and where my skin looked lighter than it really is (I'm Indian-American and am light-brown skin tone), and made my profile really full of bullet points of interesting shit I've done in the past (traveled to south america, can dance salsa, risk taker, etc)

I will admit though that none of my matches are the really hot NYC women. None of my friends match with them either. I wonder who is matching and banging the 8's and above on these online dating sites

EDIT

So you're saying you get ~7-10 matches a day with 7's and above?? Dude that is absurd. I need to pick your brain.

1. How good-looking are you? Have you ever tested out your pics on Photofeeler?
2. Do you count girls who match but never start a convo as matches?
3. Have you tried anywhere other than NYC? If so how did your results compare?

It's ridiculously hard to get the 7's, 8's, and 9's from online and that's why I'm wondering who the hell gets with them.

Male 8s, 9s, and 10s.

Everyone gets their looksmatch. There is no escaping this.

[pros80]

(12-30-2018 09:32 PM)Crash_Bandicoot Wrote:  

(12-27-2018 11:15 PM)Delta Wrote:  

(12-24-2018 10:42 PM)Crash_Bandicoot Wrote:  

NYC peep here.

I do decently well on Bumble (15-20 matches a day - - - half are 6's and below, the other half are 7's and 7.5's).

The changed that I made to my profile to get more matches was exaggerating my height (I'm 5'10'' but put 6 feet), putting pictures of me where I looked tall and jacked and where my skin looked lighter than it really is (I'm Indian-American and am light-brown skin tone), and made my profile really full of bullet points of interesting shit I've done in the past (traveled to south america, can dance salsa, risk taker, etc)

I will admit though that none of my matches are the really hot NYC women. None of my friends match with them either. I wonder who is matching and banging the 8's and above on these online dating sites

EDIT

So you're saying you get ~7-10 matches a day with 7's and above?? Dude that is absurd. I need to pick your brain.

1. How good-looking are you? Have you ever tested out your pics on Photofeeler?
2. Do you count girls who match but never start a convo as matches?
3. Have you tried anywhere other than NYC? If so how did your results compare?

Haha yeah online dating sucks. I much more prefer meeting women in-person. It has drained me hard because it just takes a lot of time. Keep in mind that I live in NYC though - which is WAY different than any other American city.

1. In reality I'm just an average looking dude. I also have brown skin (I'm Indian American) and being a minority on online dating sucks. My pics, though, are the photos where I look way better than I actually am (posing and shit). I have some really old photos of myself from a few years ago that I keep on there just because it makes me look badass and really attractive.

I realize that women don't care about a guy's career, abilities, or any of that shit - I stack my profile with lots of interesting, and fun details that will allow her to start a conversation. Realize that online game is all about PERCEPTION of who you are - not who you actually are. It's crazy, I know, but that's just how it works.

2. I would say 50% start a convo with me.

3. My results outside of NYC are drastically worse. NYC is the best dating market for me.

I've been with lots of 5's, 6's, and 7's on Bumble but that's about it. The reality is that I do way better in terms of quality for night game. It's ridiculously hard to get the 7's, 8's, and 9's from online and that's why I'm wondering who the hell gets with them.

If your targeting early 20's 8's and 9's in a big market like NYC then yea its gonna be hard. They have social circle where they get suitors and do Apps for added validation and attention.

But I've noticed that some of the older late 20s 30s ones that are a bit past their prime and were 8s and 9s in their earlier days and career types but still look good for their age reply and meet up. But they come with other issues....

[Delta]

(12-31-2018 01:31 AM)corsega Wrote:  

Everyone gets their looksmatch. There is no escaping this.

How can everyone get their looksmatch when there are far more men than women using these things? It's not even mathematically possible.

[pancakemouse]

(12-31-2018 05:30 PM)Delta Wrote:  

(12-31-2018 01:31 AM)corsega Wrote:  

Everyone gets their looksmatch. There is no escaping this.

How can everyone get their looksmatch when there are far more men than women using these things? It's not even mathematically possible.

To clarify, I meant that if you take Game-aware guys, you'll notice they end up just finding their looksmatch and imagematch. Wasn't talking about Bumble specifically.

Lots of non Game-aware guys end up just becoming incels. And lots of guys date down, because they're unaware.

[pancakemouse]

(12-31-2018 05:30 PM)Delta Wrote:  

(12-31-2018 01:31 AM)corsega Wrote:  

Everyone gets their looksmatch. There is no escaping this.

How can everyone get their looksmatch when there are far more men than women using these things? It's not even mathematically possible.

To clarify, I meant that if you take Game-aware guys, you'll notice they end up just finding their looksmatch and imagematch. Wasn't talking about Bumble specifically.

Lots of non Game-aware guys end up just becoming incels. And lots of guys date down, because they're unaware.

You get what you are

[Mig Picante]

Well, my most recent experience on Bumble has been an absolute disaster. Very few matches, about 50% of which simply expire without the woman messaging. The ones that progress to conversations go nowhere. After the initial message the chick just doesn't reply or it peters out very quickly.

I had dated a chick for about 5 months and went back on it a month or so after I broke up with her to find that some of my previous matches were still there. When I left, I messaged each one of them explaining things were getting serious for me and I was leaving the app and wished them well in their search.

I sent a re-start text and an enthusiastic conversation. This one young bird had just finished her masters degree, but was unemployed and would begin looking for work in the New Year. I had to plow to keep the conversation going, telling her about my interests to DHV, matching up her interest in nutrition with my interest in food. Recommended a number of good restaurants near her, played along, push/pull, etc.
I suggested we meet up for a coffee and she ignored me. Aftera couple of days, I asked what's up? She said she didn't want to meet up and wanted to keep talking. I did that and then tried again. She ignored me again. SO I said it was a bit one-sided and good luck in her search.

In the end, she said she found it weird i had come back to her after dating another chick. Haha such BS, she seemed immature and I never expect to get the real reason anyway.

So the only one that showed any promise unmatched me after a couple of weeks of work and fairly one-sided messaging. Unfortunately, I have to conclude that this is a waste of my time.

I don't want to participate in this bullshit and validation for them any more. I'm getting out of online dating.

I decided to hit up a chick I have fancied for a while, directly asked her to the driving range to play golf. It was an immediate yes and she suggested the following morning, she bought me coffee and we chatted for an hour before I said I had to go to the next thing that day.
Plan to do it again, she has slimmed up and is looking great!

Bumble was a dreadful waste of time. Hopefully your experiences are better.

[Mig Picante]

I also think there are fake profiles or 'placeholder' extinct profiles of past users that you get matched with by the company in order to encourage men to pay for premium features. (fuck that!)

In the end, I found myself checking the app too often. My behaviour had become thirsty checking if I'd had matches when I was otherwise happy.
This is the insidious nature of social media and these habit-forming apps. It is also passive behaviour, waiting for something outside of my control when instead I could be engaging in active pursuits like contacting the chick to play golf which had a far better outcome.

[questor70]

Yep. A Bumble match doesn't mean a heck of a lot anymore. Expect the majority of the women to simply abandon the conversation. I refuse to try to reel them back in when this happens. It's the equivalent of starting smalltalk in a bar only you don't physically see her shift her attention away and start chatting with another guy. If I leave things off with a question or I share some info about me and my interests in expectation of a response and she doesn't respond, that means she's simply not invested and chatting up other guys, so unmatch after the following weekend. Same deal if it moves to texting.

[Delta]

(01-05-2019 10:42 PM)Mig Picante Wrote:  

I sent a re-start text and an enthusiastic conversation. This one young bird had just finished her masters degree, but was unemployed and would begin looking for work in the New Year. I had to plow to keep the conversation going, telling her about my interests to DHV, matching up her interest in nutrition with my interest in food. Recommended a number of good restaurants near her, played along, push/pull, etc.
I suggested we meet up for a coffee and she ignored me. Aftera couple of days, I asked what's up? She said she didn't want to meet up and wanted to keep talking. I did that and then tried again. She ignored me again. SO I said it was a bit one-sided and good luck in her search.

Dude she did you a favor. If a girl doesn't have any enthusiasm for meeting you, there's a 100% probability your first date will be an utter waste of time if you do convince her to meet up.

Lately I've been abandoning leads left and right because I smell a god awful first date from a mile away. Long response times and short, dull replies are a sure predictor that a girl is not worth meeting. Her attitude toward you won't suddenly change in meatspace. It goes without saying that a girl who straight up ignores you is even further into this category.

[Mig Picante]

(01-06-2019 01:55 AM)Delta Wrote:  

Lately I've been abandoning leads left and right because I smell a god awful first date from a mile away. Long response times and short, dull replies are a sure predictor that a girl is not worth meeting. Her attitude toward you won't suddenly change in meatspace. It goes without saying that a girl who straight up ignores you is even further into this category.

Agreed. to clarify she was enthusiastic initially and then again during the restart and subsequent breaks of a day here or there. She would reply quickly and a couple of messages back and forth but it deteriorated.

Doesn't matter now though.

[questor70]

There's really only two ways to handle this. Either pressure her into meeting up regardless of the status of the conversation or unmatch but I feel that a lengthy courtship phase via text is simply unacceptable. Whatever her reasons, accepting this broadcasts weakness and neediness which sets a bad foundation.

The true value of the texting phase also has to be put into perspective.

You'd think the photos would be enough to know whether there's mutual attraction but it's not. Photos can lie and there are turnoffs that you just can't pick up on in photos or texting.

Often times I'll have a pretty good conversation in text but everything completely falls apart in the meetup. You just never know if the attraction is real until you meet. So it doesn't make sense to get bogged down all the way back at the texting stage.

[EwartGrogan]

I've observed that virtually all young financebros are now on Bumble instead of Tinder and getting there successfully their notches. They're definitely of high SMV and one of the most alpha professional group, yet they gave up on Tinder. It only reassures me in the belief that Tinder is truly dead now: working only for top 5% of men and for women as a machine for validation.

I didn't play with it a lot but created an account for one evening out in London and got about 40 pairs. Around 5x what I would get on Tinder (I don't swipe right on girls <6) now and around 20 out of these 40 were genuinely interested in getting to know me beyond writing "hey". Not only I had more matches than on Tinder, but they were of higher quality on average than on Tinder (around 7 on Bumble, 6 on Tinder nowadays). I'd recommend everyone moving to Bumble before online dating will be completely dead. The game is clearly rigged against us.

[Player_1337]

(01-06-2019 11:53 AM)questor70 Wrote:  

Often times I'll have a pretty good conversation in text but everything completely falls apart in the meetup. You just never know if the attraction is real until you meet. So it doesn't make sense to get bogged down all the way back at the texting stage.

After ~5 years of using these apps and dealing with tons of girls, I've concluded-- the only way to know if anything will happen and if there's any genuine chemistry is actually getting them out to meet. You're only shooting yourself in the foot by participating in endless texting and poorly planned dates.

I've dealt with girls who were very enthusiastic and compliant via text, and traveled ~30+ minutes to meet them on dates that ended up being hopelessly mediocre or even dead-on-arrival. You can even have great dates, but don't result in sex + you never see them again.

This is why I keep the pre-meet chatting to a minimum (while screening her along the way and getting confirmation photos) and always book optimal logistics (i.e. at my place or within walking distance of my place-- no exceptions).

[Player_1337]

(01-08-2019 08:15 PM)EwartGrogan Wrote:  

I've observed that virtually all young financebros are now on Bumble instead of Tinder and getting there successfully their notches. They're definitely of high SMV and one of the most alpha professional group, yet they gave up on Tinder. It only reassures me in the belief that Tinder is truly dead now: working only for top 5% of men and for women as a machine for validation.

I didn't play with it a lot but created an account for one evening out in London and got about 40 pairs. Around 5x what I would get on Tinder (I don't swipe right on girls <6) now and around 20 out of these 40 were genuinely interested in getting to know me beyond writing "hey". Not only I had more matches than on Tinder, but they were of higher quality on average than on Tinder (around 7 on Bumble, 6 on Tinder nowadays). I'd recommend everyone moving to Bumble before online dating will be completely dead. The game is clearly rigged against us.

Bumble is dead in NYC. Over the course of 2018- I conducted experiments with model photos and my own pro photos (which worked great in 2017), and the results are mediocre at best. Bumble was incredible pre-2018 (insane amounts of matches and girls enthusiastically opening).

[a beer is enough]

(01-08-2019 08:15 PM)EwartGrogan Wrote:  

I've observed that virtually all young financebros are now on Bumble instead of Tinder and getting there successfully their notches. They're definitely of high SMV and one of the most alpha professional group, yet they gave up on Tinder. It only reassures me in the belief that Tinder is truly dead now: working only for top 5% of men and for women as a machine for validation.

I didn't play with it a lot but created an account for one evening out in London and got about 40 pairs. Around 5x what I would get on Tinder (I don't swipe right on girls <6) now and around 20 out of these 40 were genuinely interested in getting to know me beyond writing "hey". Not only I had more matches than on Tinder, but they were of higher quality on average than on Tinder (around 7 on Bumble, 6 on Tinder nowadays). I'd recommend everyone moving to Bumble before online dating will be completely dead. The game is clearly rigged against us.

Online dating is not dying anytime soon, in fact I am shocked to hear Bumble is not doing as well. Worst case scenario, they just come out with a new creative app everyone gets on and that becomes what Tinder was back in 2012. Online dating is too convenient to die.

[pancakemouse]

(01-08-2019 08:15 PM)EwartGrogan Wrote:  

I've observed that virtually all young financebros are now on Bumble instead of Tinder and getting there successfully their notches. They're definitely of high SMV and one of the most alpha professional group, yet they gave up on Tinder. It only reassures me in the belief that Tinder is truly dead now: working only for top 5% of men and for women as a machine for validation.

I didn't play with it a lot but created an account for one evening out in London and got about 40 pairs. Around 5x what I would get on Tinder (I don't swipe right on girls <6) now and around 20 out of these 40 were genuinely interested in getting to know me beyond writing "hey". Not only I had more matches than on Tinder, but they were of higher quality on average than on Tinder (around 7 on Bumble, 6 on Tinder nowadays). I'd recommend everyone moving to Bumble before online dating will be completely dead. The game is clearly rigged against us.

The self-aggrandizement never fails to amaze me. Guys continue applying their own personal, subjective experiences to everyone on earth.

I had a bad experience! Conclusion: Tinder is DEAD and only works for the top 5% of men!

Bumble worked for me in my own specific situation in London! Conclusion: Everyone move to Bumble immediately!

[EwartGrogan]

Next time I will employ researchers from my think tank to swipe left and right so I can provide you with a few peer reviewed articles corroborating my anonymous post

[RatInTheWoods]

Guys GOLDEN RULE of online dating is have a few back and forth texts, then ASK TO MEET.

Nothing format, just a quick drink/coffee. ASK HER OUT.

If she will not meet you, then say "let me know if you want to catch up" and STOP TALKING TO HER.

This will save you time, filter the time wasters (there are many) and reduce thirst levels!

Do your bit for a better world, and show yourself to be high value!

[pancakemouse]

(01-10-2019 05:36 PM)EwartGrogan Wrote:  

Next time I will employ researchers from my think tank to swipe left and right so I can provide you with a few peer reviewed articles corroborating my anonymous post

Next time just post your own experience and don't try to make broader claims based on it.