Quote: (01-17-2014 03:11 PM)VincentVinturi Wrote:
I play these things by my mood rather than some hard and fast game rule. Or rather, that is my rule. Kind of like Bruce Lee's philosophy on fighting: "be like water".
If I'm in a good mood and feel like drinking a beer while waiting for a girl, cool, I'll wait. I'll sit and bullshit with the bartender and make small talk with some dude next to me and enjoy the good vibes. It's all good.
So when the girl arrives, I'm pretty nonchalant about the whole thing and she really doesn't have any power to affect my mood that night. She falls into my elated frame. And because I'm enjoying myself, I win regardless of how things go with the dame.
On the other hand, if I'm feeling annoyed then I'll respect that feeling.
I've bounced when a girl was 5 minutes late, only for the girl to text me just minutes later telling me she'd arrived. I've walked out in the middle of dates when a girl said something I didn't like or made a face that rubbed me the wrong way. Anything at all can set me off.
Or sometimes when my body decides that there isn't any physical chemistry I'll just say it was nice meeting you and disappear. In all cases I just listen to what I'm feeling, tempered by mid-range strategic decisions.
I can always be congruent when I ask myself "what do I want?" in a given situation and go with that. Always.
I'm not suggesting to act like an erratic at the whim of any and all emotions. Sometimes you need to make strategic moves that require dealing with annoying situations and feelings for the payoff a few moves ahead.
But in general, this has been an incredibly powerful M.O. for me. And while it seems short-sighted the empirical results have been quite fruitful for me. Think "unpredictable badboy".
I'd go so far as to say my whole game --- inner and outer --- could be summed up as "ask myself what do I want and do that thing. Or, put another way: identify what I don't want, and don't do that thing."
Thank you for taking the time to write such an illuminating post. It's good to hear from more experienced players in the field!
One thing in particular rang true with me - Sometimes you need to make strategic moves that require dealing with annoying situations and feelings for the payoff a few moves ahead. I follow this mantra in my day-to-day life, but (for now) seem incapable of applying this to women. Perhaps it's a pride thing - thinking that a girl should recognise my value and allow me to have her without any games.
It doesn't seem to be working so far, but hoping that some of you guys' success will rub off