[quaker13]

been with married to her 5 years and with her a total of 8. have one child whom i love like no person or thing i've loved before

those that know me know my wife makes a fair bit more than me. 500k to my 150k. when we were dating she was so feminine she could have given a man with a perfectly healthy smile multiple cavities she was so sweet. Since the child the bitch has become extremely masculine. I really can't take it. I got back from a week long business trip recently and the bitch didn't even greet me at the door when i returned, nor did she initiate a hug or kiss when i saw her a few seconds later in the house.

She knows i can get women, but not just any kinda women high quality women. When ever we go to her office functions she is visibly proud to be married to me, but at home this isn't the case. `

She knows i didn't marry her for money, so i can't imagine she would think that would be cause for me to stay. I can do just fine on my litttle 150k, as a matter of fact i could probably earn more by taking up a parttime job. I could easily get another one of her, but she couldn't get another one of me with any reasonable efficiency. She married a tall handsome educated man with game and a career and this is the horseshit im dealing with. Obviously, I would have never even remotely considered this had she behaved this way before marriage.

The wave im currently riding is getting close to the breaking point. We have done pre and post marital counseling and still do post marital counseling once a month but the lame ass counselor isnt helping.

How should i move forward? Should i tell the bitch im leaving, should i tell her im close to leaving, should i just get missing for 24 hours?

[Jefferson]

I'm in an extremely similar situation to you. I know how hard the decision is.

I think you are better off without someone if you don't enjoy having sex with her, and you don't have that feeling anymore. Life is too short. This is not a dress rehearsal.

You make good money. So does she. The child will be fine.

If you're thinking about leaving, the odds are you will.

Do the usual, separate bank account, credit card, get the affairs in order. Get the paperwork on the house you need. Then see a lawyer. Then tell her. Once all is lined up.

Good luck.

[quaker13]

I do enjoy having sex with her and I really enjoy her company when she's normal; but this masculine shit has to go. I didn't know whether or not she could be scared str8 or if her fucking humongous ego would get in the way

[Jefferson]

If you really enjoy having sex with her, then perhaps worth working it out.

But the odds that you can make a woman change her masculine ways who makes 500k are not good.

Have you tried having a direct talk and demand she change things? On the lines of unless this changes I have to consider leaving?

[quaker13]

(12-01-2018 03:07 PM)Jefferson Wrote:  

If you really enjoy having sex with her, then perhaps worth working it out.

But the odds that you can make a woman change her masculine ways who makes 500k are not good.

Have you tried having a direct talk and demand she change things? On the lines of unless this changes I have to consider leaving?

I have not, but it sounds like this weekend might be the perfect weekend for it. I have demanded she change or im leaving

I've asked her to change and then she says she needs a bunch of cryptic nonsensical things from me in order to be submissive, so basically bullshit

[Longshanks]

Have you checked whether she's having an affair? No hello after a week trip is raw. All the best.

[quaker13]

(12-01-2018 03:17 PM)Longshanks Wrote:  

Have you checked whether she's having an affair? No hello after a week trip is raw. All the best.

No i haven't. TBF, i've been one cheating fool and part of the reason i don't feel bad i because of her behavior. I'm not sure i'd even care that much if she had an affair.

[Jefferson]

What are your main reasons for wanting to leave?

What kind of behaviour? Coldness? Anything else?

So she is cold like that, but still good in bed?

[quaker13]

(12-01-2018 03:22 PM)Jefferson Wrote:  

What are your main reasons for wanting to leave?

What kind of behaviour? Coldness? Anything else?

So she is cold like that, but still good in bed?

She isn't warm or sweet like she was before the child. Ironically, I was a bigger asshole then and she was a whole lot nicer, sound familiar. I have always maintained control and frame, but i have compromised in the marriage and I considered that to be a completely reasonable and honorable thing to do.

Compromises include putting her career ahead of mind, dialing back the weed smoking, not going out with my buddies as much...etc

It's not that she's sooooo good in bed, she has a nice body and good wet whole but she doesn't have the patent on good pussy by any stretch of the imagination. Not even close.

[eradicator]

If you didn't have kids I'd totally say to bail. You say the sex is good but she has become cold and mechanical otherwise, maybe try marital counseling first, give it 6 months if you see no change, then bail.

EDIT
as for your initial question, I guess when you do decide to leave, you pack all your things, move to the guest room or start sleeping on the couch until you find a place to live. You tell her you are leaving and why(irreconcilable differences), and will make arrangements to find another place to live, hire an attorney to draw up divorce papers.

That's if you really don't want to stay and try to salvage your marriage.

[Jefferson]

I found that women lose the sweetness as the age creeps closer to 40 plus.

How old is she?

If she is over 40, then getting that sweetness back is a lost cause, imho.

[quaker13]

(12-01-2018 03:28 PM)eradicator Wrote:  

If you didn't have kids I'd totally say to bail. You say the sex is good but she has become cold and mechanical otherwise, maybe try marital counseling first, give it 6 months if you see no change, then bail.

Thanks for your response. Her sex is good but not atom splitting or ground breaking. I've been with a ton of women, I would never marry a woman for sex or remain married for sex. We have been marital counseling from the inception, even before the kid.

[quaker13]

(12-01-2018 03:29 PM)Jefferson Wrote:  

I found that women lose the sweetness as the age creeps closer to 40 plus.

How old is she?

If she is over 40, then getting that sweetness back is a lost cause, imho.

She turns 41 next year lol

[rudebwoy]

I am not excusing her behaviour, but she must work hard to earn that kinda of money.

Sounds like it would be best for you to take a break from her, make her know your serious.

[Jefferson]

Well, you're thinking of leaving because she doesn't hug or kiss you when get home. That seems sex related.

[Jefferson]

(12-01-2018 03:32 PM)quaker13 Wrote:  

(12-01-2018 03:29 PM)Jefferson Wrote:  

I found that women lose the sweetness as the age creeps closer to 40 plus.

How old is she?

If she is over 40, then getting that sweetness back is a lost cause, imho.

She turns 41 next year lol

Spot on.

Funny enough my own wife also approached 40 as I considered leaving. She's 38.

[quaker13]

(12-01-2018 03:32 PM)rudebwoy Wrote:  

I am not excusing her behaviour, but she must work hard to earn that kinda of money.

Sounds like it would be best for you to take a break from her, make her know your serious.

That's what I was thinking. A few months to a year, I'm almost 100% sure she is going to try to call my bluff. She's gonna shit herself when she says, "well if you think you need a break you should just forget about the marriage" and I say,"ok that makes sense, See yah!!" Of course it will be all bluster

[Repo]

How submissive is she during sex? Have you tried tying her up, slapping her, and other degrading shit to spice it up?

[quaker13]

(12-01-2018 03:37 PM)Repo Wrote:  

How submissive is she during sex? Have you tried tying her up, slapping her, and other degrading shit to spice it up?

she's pretty milquetoast, she has a low pain tolerance and doesn't like it too rough. She really prefers slow and sensual vs the "thug/hooligan" dick

[Sgt Donger]

(12-01-2018 03:20 PM)quaker13 Wrote:  

I'm not sure i'd even care that much if she had an affair.

That says it all. The emotional relationship is over. It sound like you are just staying around for practical reasons...which isn't bad, many marriages work like that.

You know it's over. It's just a matter of how long you can put up with your current situation.

[quaker13]

(12-01-2018 03:39 PM)Sgt Donger Wrote:  

(12-01-2018 03:20 PM)quaker13 Wrote:  

I'm not sure i'd even care that much if she had an affair.

That says it all. The emotional relationship is over. It sound like you are just staying around for practical reasons...which isn't bad, many marriages work like that.

You know it's over. It's just a matter of how long you can put up with your current situation.

I'd be a little surprised, but not sure i'd be hurt. In defense of her, I just don't give women my whole heart either, maybe like 80% but that's it. I always hold on to a little bit of my heart for myself. I also have a fucked a lot of married WOmen who have cheated on perfectly good husbands so in that regard i think it's just human, not even so much female nature

[eradicator]

Good points, you can try some bdsm or a fuck swing to spice things up. But if she just became less interested due to old age, probably should consider bailing.

And you have been in marital counseling since the time you first got married?! Why did you marry her if you were already having troubles from the start?

[Repo]

(12-01-2018 03:39 PM)quaker13 Wrote:  

(12-01-2018 03:37 PM)Repo Wrote:  

How submissive is she during sex? Have you tried tying her up, slapping her, and other degrading shit to spice it up?

she's pretty milquetoast, she has a low pain tolerance and doesn't like it too rough. She really prefers slow and sensual vs the "thug/hooligan" dick

I've never met a woman who didnt like both depending on the mood. . . ..especially somewhat masculine ones. Just an idea, but you can up the link without actual pain, along with other suggestions I would at least give it a shot before giving up on her. Handcuffs and a blindfold wont cause pain, but can be lots of fun.

[eradicator]

(12-01-2018 03:42 PM)quaker13 Wrote:  

I also have a fucked a lot of married men who have cheated on perfectly good husbands so in that regard i think it's just human, not even so much female nature

I really hope that's a typo.

[quaker13]

(12-01-2018 03:45 PM)eradicator Wrote:  

(12-01-2018 03:42 PM)quaker13 Wrote:  

I also have a fucked a lot of married men who have cheated on perfectly good husbands so in that regard i think it's just human, not even so much female nature

I really hope that's a typo.

LOL yes it was. Good catch