[John Michael Kane]

Background (Wife Search Abroad): thread-50002.html
Side note (Tips on picking up Hapa women): thread-11612.html

As discussed in the thread above, many Western men are searching outside of the USA, Canada and Europe for a more traditional and stable woman to be their wife, plus the future mother of their children. Asian women of different countries are often discussed. (Chinese, Vietnamese, Vietnamese, etc.)

I've been in relationships with Chinese and Filipinas before, and can confirm the more traditional ones can make excellent wives. Vietnamese women seem very balance in terms of hard working attitudes but also balanced outlook, with respect of husband and family being key cultural traits.

Assuming I, or any other white man, falls in love with some Asian girl, gets married and has kids, obviously they are going to be half-white and half-Asian, or hapa. It is my concern that seeing the East and West are obviously two very different sets of cultures, that children from these marriages could suffer an identity crisis.

Here's some food for thought:

This hapa guy has a whole channel dedicated to complaining about how Asian women like dating white men. He has a tremendous self-loathing. In some of his videos he goes to suggest that half-white, half-Asian men are prone to becoming Elliot Rodgers types. His videos are cringe-worthy, but I watched a few to get into his mindset:

Two foreign nationals talk about being a foreigner in China, and marrying in China, and not being considered "Chinese" because they are not ethnically Chinese. Many mainland Chinese are extremely racist towards non-Asians, having a half-Chinese, half-white baby in China (assuming you stay there) seems like a real chance of making your child a social outcast.

Here's the wife of one of the two guys in the video above, talking about their baby and Chinese citizenship issues:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_3p_TBMgaKg

Here's a married couple where a Korean woman married a black man who is originally from Kenya:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LCZQsA7yyQ0

She discusses some of the challenges of biracial kids, living in South Korea.

Here was a video produced by ABC of a white woman who fell in love with an Asian guy, only to have her white parents disapprove. While this is certainly a less common paring by huge margin (white women, Asian man), I thought I'd bring it up in case any Asian guys are considering marrying a white woman:

Here's a half-black, half Korean NFL player's story:

(Taken with a grain of salt, given that ESPN is a SJW company?)

Here's a hapa girl talking about do Asian guys get shot down by hapa girls?

Okay, enough videos.

Here's some of my general impressions, and some questions for the community here regarding half-Asians:

• If you get married and have a half-white/half-asian girl, she stands a very good chance of being attractive.
• If you have a half-white, half Asian son I think he'll have a harder time fitting in despite his exotic looks. It seems based upon some general research that there are who half-Asian guys are resentful of one or both parents
• Half-asian boys don't see many Asian man, white woman couples, and with many Asian women dating/marrying white men, they see it through a lens of rejection of their own Asian-ness?
• Asian women in general seem to appreciate more beta personality traits in men than many white women. Because of that, more nerdy white men often date Asian women. These aren't necessarily your traditional loving alpha male. They are more the geeky white beta male that doesn't have a strong identity. That seems to be the case of the hapa boy that is linked in the first video in this thread. He seems very resentful that his father isn't masculine. Perhaps maybe half-Asian sons aren't upset about being half-Asian, but rather some of the more dopey white guys that marry their mothers?
• Men in general (of any race) need tribal or group identity, I'd argue more so than girls. A woman's true identity is in the home and family. But for a half-Asian boy, his identity is split. How does a well-meaning father of a half-Asian son give him self-respect and confidence given that there seems to be a lot of negative stereotypes about Asian men or half-Asian men?
• Are there any half-Asian guys here, or men that have spent considerable time with half-Asians (men or women)? If so, I'd really appreciate to hear your stories about growing up with biracial parents. Do you feel your parents really loved and respected each other, or did they marry for other reasons? Do you feel they treated you with respect? How about identity? Do you feel split between two cultures, not really attached to one or the other, or do you feel it is a net positive because you might know multiple languages, have a more exotic look, etc? Do you feel being half-Asian is a net positive, negative or neutral?
• What are some ideas that you would have for a man who marries into a different culture and has kids? What's the best way to raise them with a respect for both cultures and not lose their identity, or become driftless SJW types?
• I'm attracted to Asian women, but also other types (Latina, White). Is the identity or other parenting issues more specific to half-Asian children, or do you feel they apply to any bi-racial kid?
• Does it really matter which country/ethnicity of the woman or woman's host country? Is Korea more harsh on bi-racial kids than say Japan, or China? Or some other combo?
  

[LikeABaller]

I don't know about the discrimination they face in Asia, but god damn that hapa chick is hot. If I had a son I would want it from a slav mother, if I had a daughter I would want it from an Asian mother.
Thats all there is to say for me.
In Thailand a lot of girls dream of having mixed race babies, albeit not from African fathers : )

In the negative cases above the father is usually African, not Western.

Asian people are very racist toward non whites so theres that, didnt surprise me that those chinese-african kids faced discrimination.

[Suits]

[John Michael Kane]

(12-26-2016 11:02 PM)LikeABaller Wrote:  

I don't know about the discrimination they face in Asia, but god damn that hapa chick is hot. If I had a son I would want it from a slav mother, if I had a daughter I would want it from an Asian mother.

Slavs tend to have more hyper-masculine features (and often attitudes), so I can see where you're coming from on that point.

Quote:

In Thailand a lot of girls dream of having mixed race babies, albeit not from African fathers : )

I've talked with a lot of different Asian girls (Viets, Filipinas, Indonesians and Thais mostly). Many Asian women want a white father to have "beautiful" children in their own words. They either brought it up themselves, or if I questioned why they are interested in me, as a foreigner? In the Philippines especially, pretty much all their celebs are half-white. Seems to be a huge bonus there, whereas I think it might be more a negative in a more "tribal" country like South Korea or China?

Quote:

In the negative cases above the father is usually African, not Western.

I'm not black, but have read plenty of the black guys on this forum who have spent time in Asia have mixed reviews as to whether or not they were welcomed, abused or treated as an exotic treat. I'm interested in finding out what the general issues are regarding bi-racial marriages with a pairing of an Asian mother and some type of non-Asian father.

Quote:

Asian people are very racist toward non whites so theres that, didnt surprise me that those chinese-african kids faced discrimination.

Well, there's certainly not denying that there are racial biases against black dudes. I'm not black, so obviously my experiences in Asia are from my white perspective. For any black guy considering marrying an Asian woman, he probably has extra hurdles to make it work, but if he's determined enough not to settle for the average black woman here in America (overweight and not very feminine), then he's probably used to pulling extra weight to get what he wants. Any black men here want to comment?

(12-26-2016 11:07 PM)Suits Wrote:  

Oh come on now. You're one of our resident Asia experts. You can certainly do better than that.

Sidenote: That gif is strangely mesmerizing.

[Bobb Johnson]

Well I'm aware of many Black soldiers in the US military who married Asian women (and German women). One of my high school classmates was from such a union, black military dad and Japanese mom.

Anyways as a black man I can't really answer your questions OP, as personally I've never been with Asian chicks. Don't really know if Asian chicks will like black guys either.

With regards to hapa, from what I observe they do have conflicting identity crises. You may want to consider that carefully if you get married and have children. It is your call at the end of the day.

[John Michael Kane]

(12-26-2016 11:25 PM)Bobb Johnson Wrote:  

Well I'm aware of many Black soldiers in the US military who married Asian women (and German women). One of my high school classmates was from such a union, black military dad and Japanese mom.

Do you know if he felt accepted in Japan, or the US for that matter? Hopefully two loving parents that made it work? If you have more details, I'd love to hear them.

Quote:

Anyways as a black man I can't really answer your questions OP, as personally I've never been with Asian chicks. Don't really know if Asian chicks will like black guys either.

I think it really depends upon the specific country for black guys. I've read several times that Chinese can be absolutely brutal with racism against blacks, especially the more provincial ones.

Conversely, I know of many Filipinas that actually have a thing for black guys, just like they do for white guys. I think white guys in Asia get a more general pass, but if you're interested in Asian women, the door is open in certain niches.

Quote:

With regards to hapa, from what I observe they do have conflicting identity crises. You may want to consider that carefully if you get married and have children. It is your call at the end of the day.

Yes, and that's what I'm concerned about. I want to raise strong kids. As we well know, many women aren't fit to be mothers in the West. There's simply a shortage of women qualified for the job. A wife is obviously a key component to a happy marriage, which means a man can't discount foreign options.

I'm just curious to find out if the identity problems that arise sometimes with hapa kids are more due to poor parenting or appreciation of both cultures, or because it is intrinsically hard to raise a kid that is a byproduct of West and East meeting each other?

[Bobb Johnson]

OP,

I think it will come down to how you raise your hapa kids but more importantly the environment they grow up in.

You need to accept that your hapa kids will have some issues and growing pains; whether they grow up in the East or West. It may be grave or may be a thorn in their side, it depends.

I've seen this with immigrants in the US where their kids have a clash of cultures; home culture, American culture and peer pressure of being a teenager. Many of them turn out alright if not better than their US peers, while others have gone a different direction.

Like I said it is up to you. I don't think it is the end of the world, it'll just be a different set of challenges. It seems you're already aware of them which is good start.

[GlobalMan]

(12-26-2016 11:07 PM)Suits Wrote:  

thread-55294.html

[Gorgiass]

This thread - http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-55294-page-2.html had some discussion on the topic from various races. I tend to agree with your points and am interested in hearing more first hand experiences as well, as I also want kids (sometimes) and like Asian women.

[Captain Gh]

in my humble opinion, i don't think that an half Asian/half White child will face that much discrimination overall. My belief about raising successful half breed kids is that you need to prepare them since discrimination & comments about that aspect are sure to come up. Due to that, they won't be the happiest kids on the block since the "death of their innocence" will come at a much earlier age then most kids... but at least you're gearing them up for success.

As someone who will probably have bi-racial children, I'm not taking the chance of them being naive, sensitive & then get blindsided by some of the hatred that out there. He'll get it straight while he's young, and have the tools to maturely deal with it. Strongly suggest you do the same even though the discrimination might not be as high as a bi-racial kid from Black descent.

[dallasguy]

Some HAPA guys end up fine and some are rejects. That Elliot Rodgers kid was a loser because he didn't learn game. He seemed like a good looking guy. Russell Wong, Brandon Lee, and Mark Paul Gosselaar are HAPA. Most HAPA girls are hot. HAPA kids do fine if you raise them right.

[Atlanta Man]

I would like to address the elephant in the room, Elliot Roger. His father did a shitty job raising him and was a mostly absent father. When he should have been at home seeing to his family he decided to chase his dreams instead of focusing on his family like a man. Chasing your dreams, traveling the world, and trying to make a movie is great if you are single without children-but once you have kids you need to do your job as father and create stability.

[Maxzilla]

Interracial child = you are the literal product of a racial fetishization/inferiority complex. Do what you want in terms of just dating but think carefully before producing a child. Writing the Youtuber off because he's "self-loathing" means you can't stomach his uncomfortable truths. Of course he's self-loathing, that's his whole point - he's warning others so they can avoid it. I know a fair bit about this first hand because I have mixed raced cousins.

[Cumulonimbus]

(12-26-2016 11:02 PM)LikeABaller Wrote:  

If I had a son I would want it from a slav mother, if I had a daughter I would want it from an Asian mother.

I think that too but imho it's not just about the looks. From personal experience I get the feeling that Asian women raise their children emphasising character traits like expressiveness and verbality (good for girls) whereas Eastern European women raise their children emphasising character traits like independence and self reliance (good for boys). If it were possible, I would pick an EE woman with the character and aging of an Asian woman. Whichever the case, there needs to be a solid-red-pill father to steer the boat in the right direction and prepare any bi-racial children of eventual shit that might be thrown at them down the road.

I think it's an interesting topic and would be great to hear opinions/experiences on the matter.

[Thomas the Rhymer]

(12-27-2016 01:19 AM)Maxzilla Wrote:  

I know a fair bit about this first hand because I have mixed raced cousins.

I'm interested in your first hand experiences. Do share...

[JWLZG]

(12-27-2016 01:19 AM)Maxzilla Wrote:  

Interracial child = you are the literal product of a racial fetishization/inferiority complex[....] I know a fair bit about this first hand because I have mixed raced cousins.

Your first hand knowledge via your mixed cousins gave you licence to write off every Hapa union in one stroke.

(12-26-2016 10:40 PM)John Michael Kane Wrote:  

OP snip

The "angry hapa guy" phenomenon seems to be exclusive to the US. I went to school with 5 Hapa guys, and all of the turned out well-adjusted, successful WRT their peer group, for that matter. I remember one of them was even popular with the ladies. From what I know of their parents: Their mums are Sri Lankan, Chinese (x2), Japanese, Vietnamese and none of them were the stereotype of the "impoverished gold-digging village girl wanting to avoid her beta countrymen" — one of them was a Japanese teacher at our school, and another taught Chinese elsewhere. Likewise, their fathers didn't fit the "skinny beta white nerd" stereotype; one of them was our Headmaster.

I've gotten to know other half Asian-white kids (some of them were Asian on their father's side) over the years, but I brought up those five specifically because I knew them the longest.

And while you gave a reasonable explanation about Hapa girls fitting into society (any one) better than their brothers, I can't fully buy that belief. Children (in this day and age, like it or not) are primarily a product of their culture, and to a lesser extent their fathers' influence. They'll identify with the dominant cultural narrative they grew up in, not some Blood and Soil concept of racial identity that hardly belongs in an extremely multicultural society like America. What is to say that a hapa boy's Asianess is dominant enough for him to feel the supposed cultural stigma against Asian men? Should not full-blooded Asian guys in America experience the similar level of cultural tension being born of two separate cultures?

[TTQQTT]

I grew up as a bi-racial kid in EE. If you can take a joke (some very offensive and racist jokes) you'll be fine. Now that I'm older, I realize I can't blame my "race" for any of my problems.

[262]

This thread belongs in Everything Excrement, not Game.

Edit: If this thread stays in Game, then the Game solution is to make sure you raise your kids so they aren't punk-ass bitches. Teach them Game (Girl Game for girls), travel with them (so they learn how to take risks, etc.), and get them physically and mentally fit.

[CleanSlate]

When the OP first posted this, I subscribed to this thread because I thought he was asking a legit question.

I hope this thread doesn't fall apart, as many race-related threads have.

Although I'm not mixed race myself, I grew up in a different culture than the one my parents were born into.

[Excelsior]

(12-26-2016 11:13 PM)John Michael Kane Wrote:  

I'm not black, but have read plenty of the black guys on this forum who have spent time in Asia have mixed reviews as to whether or not they were welcomed, abused or treated as an exotic treat. I'm interested in finding out what the general issues are regarding bi-racial marriages with a pairing of an Asian mother and some type of non-Asian father.

Quote:

Asian people are very racist toward non whites so theres that, didnt surprise me that those chinese-african kids faced discrimination.

Well, there's certainly not denying that there are racial biases against black dudes. I'm not black, so obviously my experiences in Asia are from my white perspective. For any black guy considering marrying an Asian woman, he probably has extra hurdles to make it work, but if he's determined enough not to settle for the average black woman here in America (overweight and not very feminine), then he's probably used to pulling extra weight to get what he wants. Any black men here want to comment?

All of my upcoming comments are based off of second hand knowledge, as well as some first-hand experience with asian-american women. Take it for what it's worth (grains of salt and all that).

Whiteness is, in a very general sense, the preference in Asia. I think this phenomenon is well known and well documented both here and elsewhere, so I shouldn't need to expand on it too much. It is fetishized and sought after more than anything else, and the "White god" factor is real.
This being said, there's variation by culture/nation with regard to the desirability of black men and the acceptability of dating them.

My general impression has been that The Philippines is the nation where black men are most desired and dating them most acceptable.
Korea seems to be the worst - stigmas seem stronger there than many other parts of East/Southeast Asia.

Korea is actually one of the most virulently racist places on Earth. To give you an idea of what I mean, consider this fact: in Korea, the military still uses mandatory conscription for all nationals. Until a few years ago, it was illegal for those of mixed race to serve in the Korean military - they could not be conscripted because being of mixed race was considered to be in the same category of other disqualifying "defects" like alcoholism, criminality, physical disorders, etc. Thus, mixed-race Koreans were exempted from conscription. The law has only recently been amended such that mixed folks can legally serve.

Let that sink in for a second: Korea was so virulently opposed to the existence of mixed race Koreans that it wouldn't even allow them to die in service of it until very recently.

Here's a reddit thread where you can find some comments detailing the nature of the bias against blacks in Korea from a romantic perspective. Bias exists against all non-Koreans in Korea, but it is much greater when it comes to blacks who are generally considered to be at the bottom of every totem pole in the Korean mind. You'll find few places in the developed world with similar levels of bigotry.

Thailand, Japan, and China seem generally more open and tolerant with regard to black men than Korea, though stigmas are still strong. Reports I read from black men who spend time in those nations seem far more positive than those in Korea - I actually don't think I've ever read a trip report/journal from a black male visiting Korea that was anything more than "eh" from a romantic sense. Most weren't positive at all.

So, to summarize, Filipinas are pretty open and put up fewer hurdles for black men. East Asia is harder, but the highest hurdles are probably on the Korean peninsula - Japan and China have some potential but there seem to be more hurdles there than in The Philippines. If you're black and you are looking to Asia as a romantic destination, The Philippines appears to be the safest bet and you should ignore South Korea entirely.

My first hand experiences with Asian American women line up with this for the most part: Asian-American girls with Southeast Asian (Mostly Filipina, but also Thai and Cambodian) backgrounds seem to be the most open, while East Asian (Japanese/Korean/Chinese-American) girls appear less so. The East Asian Americans seem significantly more open than their peers back in their ancestral homelands, but many of the racialist dating preferences do remain - they show an extremely strong preference for whites and some of the stigmas I described above are present among them to a greater degree than you might see within other American groups (especially if they were raised by parents who were born/raised back in the far east - those stigmas die hard and if they love their parents they will think twice about getting serious with a guy whose background is likely to instantly piss them off the minute she brings him home).

Below is a flow chart designed as a mock "dating guide" for your typical California Bay Area Asian girl. It is meant as a joke, but there are kernels of truth in it that are relevant and probably speak at least somewhat accurately to the real life openness/preferences of the average East Asian-American in the states.



TL;DR (to summarize the chart): Whites are preference #1 by a wide margin, while Asians and Blacks can get by after clearing significantly higher hurdles. The Filipinas have lower hurdles for black men than others.

Again, this is just my general impression of the Asian scene for black males and most of it is coming from secondhand observation (talking to peers with firsthand experience, reading reports/journals/blogs, etc), so take it with a grain of salt. Hopefully some of the black males in the community with more Asia experience (paging TravelerKai) can chime in and add more accurate firsthand perspectives and/or correct anything I missed/got wrong above.

[username]

(12-26-2016 11:13 PM)John Michael Kane Wrote:  

In the Philippines especially, pretty much all their celebs are half-white. Seems to be a huge bonus there, whereas I think it might be more a negative in a more "tribal" country like South Korea or China?

I agree with the Philippines part.

I can't speak about any other Asian countries but I do know the Philippines very well. In the Philippines being half white/half Filipino male or female is positive. I've asked several Filipinas what they think about half white/half Filipino guys and they all speak positively about them and how they are taller than regular Filipino guys, have nice face, skin, and features, are almost always handsome, etc.

One of the girls even told me she avoids half white/half Filipino guys. Why? She said they are handsome but they are all players and have lots of girls.

Meanwhile if you dropped that same guy in the United States there is a high percentage he would be an outcast or struggle with his identity. Even worse as mentioned above Asian girls, white girls, pretty much all girls would avoid him.

[TornadoByProxy]

OP,
The fact that you put so much thought into this issue means you most likely won't raise disfunctional hapa children. I think it is the lack of foresight that causes these issues more than "people are racists".

[the high]

From my own experience fucking Asian girls isn't terribly difficult if you're Black, it's converting them into ltr's is often where the rubber meets the road. Fortunately I have no desire to shack up with an Asian chick long term.

Of the East Asians Japan is it's own animal on its views of Black people.

[Captain Gh]

^ Can you please expand on this? Curious since I might be setting up shop in Japan for some business reasons.

[the high]

(12-27-2016 12:42 PM)Captain Gh Wrote:  

^ Can you please expand on this? Curious since I might be setting up shop in Japan for some business reasons.

I feel like we're derailing the OP's thread, but people have already put it out there so...

Disclaimer: Although I've been with a few Japanese chicks in the states I have not yet traveled to Japan

Although there is still racism, Japan just has a different perception of Black people (specifically African Americans) than Koreans and Chinese do. Why it is I don't know. Maybe because Japan was the first East Asian country to embrace American cultural ideas and standards or something. Their views range from curiosity and even reverence to exploitation.

I've been casually learning Japanese for the last year so I Skype with Japanese people every week so it gives me insights also.

Curious enough there is a whole porn genre dedicated to Black men fucking Japanese women. I'm not saying this to big up Black men because I think a lot of it borders on exploitation not unlike American interracial porn:


But it's not all peaches and rainbows they're [East] Asian so things like valuing white skin and what not are prevalent there especially for a woman. So if you're White your mileage with women should, in theory, go farther but it all seems to depend. I hear of White guys who bomb there and Black guys who kill there and vice versa.

Anyway there are tons of Black people talking about their experiences in Japan all over Youtube. And a few on this forum.