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Pussy Shock
08-16-2011, 12:57 PM
This is an interesting thread/topic, and a lot of guys have already touched on a lot of things here. I personally can relate in some ways, I've never been a true nerd in the classic sense (video games, WOW, comic books, etc.), my problem was mostly social and sexual anxiety around women, but those two issues are often the root causes of a lot of guys' failure in this "game".
Sure if you're a nerd, a lot of things may need to change in oder to improve with women, lot's of "outer game" stuff, such as getting a hair cut, going to the gym, buying new clothes, etc., but most of it lies with "inner game." A lot of guys after spending their entire lives without getting any success or limited success with girls/women, simply give up on themselves. The adopt a defeated attitude, so they've already conceded that they've lost, and they give up on trying.
If you want to achieve at anything in life you have to work for it. Period, point blank, this is especially true if you lack the natural gifts or tools to be successful in a certain realm. Sure you may have the highest rank on World of Warcraft and that may earn you respect of your nerd peers, but it's not going to attract women and arose them sexually. As someone said, self-improvement is paramount, you really have to work on creating your best self, in order to attract women.
Like Gmac's proverbial example of the acne faced, video game nerd, who lives with his parents.... What woman is going to want to have sex with that guy, let alone get into a relationship with him? I mean seriously, if you have nothing going for you, you can't bitch and moan about not getting women. You can't even read "Bang" or every other piece of seduction material and expect change, if you don't change other aspects of your life that are holding you back.
So when I talk about inner game, I like to quote Bob Marley: "emancipate yourself from mental slavery." A lot of us our slaves to our own belief systems, and a lot of time our belief systems are what's holding us back, a lot of guys seriously lack confidence and self esteem, and are operating under a negative frame work of "self limiting beliefs". A lot of these beliefs have been formulated at the hands of others whether that be "the popular kids" who made fun of you because you were poorer, shorter, and had "hand-me-down" clothes, or your parents who were unloving and emotionally, verbally abusive.
Whatever your past was, or whatever your current belief system is, shatter it. Take control of your life and your destiny. You think that you are a WBAFC ("way below average frustrated chump"), then you will be. It's called actualization and self fullfilling prophecy, in other words "psychology 101".
Learn to love yourself and realize that you are a unique person with a lot to offer the world, not only women. Develop your interests, hobbies, and talents, but more importantly work on yourself. Once you develop your sense of self love, and self worth, realize that no one else is better than you.
You may see that beautiful girl that's a "9" and she's a super special magical "unicorn" in your eyes, you put her on the "pedestal" and she's untouchable. Well let me let you in on a little secret (I learned this one the hard way BTW)... Her shit stinks too! She maybe hot and you may want to fuck her till next Tuesday, but deep down inside she's a fucked up, shallow, materialistic, stupid person, with deep seeded psychological and emotional issues. No one is perfect.
Remember that next time you see an attractive girl that you want to approach, but you're too nervous, and cock block yourself. You need to reframe how you think and perceive the world. Overcome your approach anxiety and fear of rejection. Simply learn to not give a fuck, learn to not care what others think about you, and don't let their opinions and reactions dictate how you feel about yourself and the world.
Hope this helps...