[StrikeBack]

After posting about my engagement here, I intended to write a bit about my LTR game, just to share with the forum, and to remind my future self what it takes to have a successful marriage. This is one of those posts.

Just before I met my wife, I was working hard towards being location independent and moving overseas to find quality women, as I was convinced that I was never going to find one in Australia. I had largely succeeded at creating work for myself and a minimalist lifestyle to be location independent, so what remained to be done was simply to pick the countries. Based on previous experiences, I knew that I'd do very well in SEA, FSU and Latin America. Even Scandinavian and Southern European countries would be good to me, for female attention, although obviously they're going to be poor for wife quality.

As life turned out, I met my wife just a couple of months before I was going to embark on those trips. While from day one I was very pleased with her, I wanted to make damn sure she was the right choice, so I thought why not bring her along on my trips to those poosy paradises and see for myself how she compares to their girls. Now, it is a well-known Game tenet that you do not bring your girl on such a trip, but I think that only applies to girls you're casually dating with no serious intention. However for a girl you seriously consider a LTR or marriage with, I believe it is a fantastic test. My rationale was that if I felt I could get better in those countries, well, I'd already be in those countries and can do easy quick comparisons with my own eyes... and if not, then I would put a ring on it. Moreover, I wanted to see how she'd respond to seeing the abundance of options I have.

We've made quite a few trips, some just for holidays, some as part of my work, to SEA, FSU, Southern Europe, Scandinavia and even to a poosy hell (New Zealand ). And I'm very happy to see her pass all the tests with flying colours. Here are some of my observations:

1. I realised how much abundance I have in terms of options. I already knew I'd have lots of attention, but it's tripled with the social proof of a beautiful woman in my arms. Looks wise, I knew that I've already got the best deal I could get for myself.

If you suspect that you could do better than the woman you're choosing for a LTR, I highly recommend going on such a trip, as you will definitely gain the confidence to do what's necessary.

I'm trying to get my brother-in-law to go travelling a bit as he - like many young decent-looking Aussie men - is dating a fat annoying bitch. Hopefully it will have the right effect on him.

2. My woman fit right along all of those feminine pretty girls we run into. In regions like SEA, even many Western girls who are very much WB can look harsh or act rather masculine, due to the sea of sweet petite and feminine girls around them.

3. She gets jelly about the female attention I get (while not noticing all the thirty males looking at her or trying to get her attention) but her responses to that is her desires to grow her hair longer, wear pretty and colourful clothes, exercise harder to be sexier for me, etc. She knows what I like and what I can get, and she wants to make sure she is all that. Now some of the female attention I get was from women genuinely attracted to me, some only because I have social proof (i.e my wife) and some are booth babes at my work flirting around as they do, but to my wife, it made no difference, she thinks they all want to have my babies. I tell her I know I have plenty of attention and options, but I choose her. Our trips were perfect occasions to set that frame and get the soft dread going, as it's not easy for me to do so in Australia.

In contrast, I saw other men travelling to those poosy paradises with their fat women who had to pretend not to notice all the hot young things around them because their kaiju bitches got jealous and angry at them for looking. Sad!

4. We stayed at a variety of places: from regular AirBnB to 5 star resorts, from places with leaky bathrooms and crappy bed to ones that made our jaws drop. We visited grand palaces and dirty local markets. I could book all nice hotels or visit all the fancy places, but I chose to make it random to see what she's like. Through all of those, my woman reacted the same: she just wanted to be with me, she did not once complain about anything, and we had a lot of fun everywhere.

5. I watched how she interacted with the service people especially the women, in places where we were treated like royalty. She got on extremely well with them, making friends easy everywhere, and was very well liked by the staff. In SEA, they all thought she was Russian (because I'm Asian, and she's feminine and sweet) and were very shocked to find out that she's Australian. If you don't yet know, Aussie women have a reputation of being fat, vulgar, loud, slutty and generally obnoxious in SEA.

My mother worked in the service industry in her younger years and I would never marry a woman who disrespects service staff. I was very pleased that my woman behaved with such grace.

6. We obviously ate out a lot during those trips, and every time after we got back, her cooking would improve because she desires to cook better for me than those restaurants do.

If you have a woman you are seriously considering a LTR or marriage with, I strongly recommend taking her to *your* poosy paradise and put her straight up against the competition. That will answer many questions you have, or have not even thought of yet.

Don't take her to New Zealand though, she might be the only hot woman in the entire city and it will defeat the purpose of your test!

[John Michael Kane]

Just finished reading your engagement thread, and now this one. Hats off to you, my good man. A combination of good fortune and setting up your ducks in a row to be attractive to the right kind of woman who is looking to be locked down. I'm 32 now and strongly believe that the best of wives marry very young. Women need a certain naive and warm view of love which becomes all but impossible if they hop on the cock carousel, which is a very strong incentive for a man to date down in age if he can secure a girl before she ruins herself. Just out of curiosity, what are your respective ages?

Interesting perspective on testing her out to see how she behaves with others, a critical part of screening for a proper woman. Testing a woman's metal under a bit of fire helps separate the wheat from the chaff.

Keep this thread updated, I'm in your same shoes regarding wife searching and agree strongly with Roosh's ideals. I'm filtering, filtering, filtering! Still, a man can always take heart with a solid report from the front.

Another good read for LTR game from a new father with one more on the way: thread-50925.html

Lets hear the stories of married life as they come in. What's working and what's not. Keep spreading the wisdom.

Liked and repped.

[Altrighter]

Solid advice.

[kirdiesel]

I have a experienced a much smaller version of this test by bringing a potential LTR with me to nightclubs. (Although the vacation test is a great one)

If I am at a club with tons of hot ass walking around and girls checking me out and I have the feeling that "im missing out" or "i wish she wasnt here" then I know this girl is possibly not for me.

[eddie_7]

StrikeBack, I remember reading your engagement thread and not to sound corny but it filled me with such joy and hope! I'm really happy for you man! In the future I wish to do the same. Liked and repped.

Really good advice by the way. I especially agree with point 4 and I think its one of the most important things to consider: that your wife just wanted to be with you and that her happiness does not hinge on mere externals such as living conditions or wealth. I think one of the signs of a healthy LTR/marriage is that the woman is able to derive contentment and happiness from the mere masculine presence of her man, regardless of what sufferings, tragedies and bad days may befall them. I think in this type of relationship the woman will be by the man's side, supporting him as well as happily residing in his masculine love and protection.

(12-10-2016 03:08 AM)John Michael Kane Wrote:  

Another good read for LTR game from a new father with one more on the way: thread-50925.html

Lets hear the stories of married life as they come in. What's working and what's not. Keep spreading the wisdom.

Yet another story about a new father you might be interested in: thread-58409.html

[Roardog]

Seems like you really found a diamond in the rough!

As I read this thread and type this I am sitting in a high end French restaurant in Singapore. There is a group of aussies sitting at a table near me, two couples of successful men with their grating kaiju wives,
At another table on the other side of the restaurant is a late middle aged white man with an attractive and slim Asian girl at least 20 years his junior.
Beside them is a middle aged Asian man also with an incredibly attractive Asian girl many years his junior.

At the same time I have my smoking hot Chinese girlfriend texting me about the outfit she's putting together for me based on video clip from "hit me baby one more time".

Sitting here reading your thread and seeing this, I am just reminded of why I left Australia and gave up on aussie women and how much I love living in Asia.

[John Michael Kane]

Australia certainly seems similar to the United States in terms of finding diamonds in the rough. I don't think the average Western girl really realizes how much Western men value you feminity, which Asian girls, on average, nail to a T. Of all the girls I've dated, the most feminine and sweet girls were Asian.

[eddie_7]

(12-13-2016 06:58 PM)John Michael Kane Wrote:  

Australia certainly seems similar to the United States in terms of finding diamonds in the rough. I don't think the average Western girl really realizes how much Western men value you feminity, which Asian girls, on average, nail to a T. Of all the girls I've dated, the most feminine and sweet girls were Asian.

Interesting observation about Asian women. What do you think are the main factors that compel them to be more feminine/sweet?

[StrikeBack]

(12-10-2016 03:08 AM)John Michael Kane Wrote:  

Just finished reading your engagement thread, and now this one. Hats off to you, my good man. A combination of good fortune and setting up your ducks in a row to be attractive to the right kind of woman who is looking to be locked down. I'm 32 now and strongly believe that the best of wives marry very young. Women need a certain naive and warm view of love which becomes all but impossible if they hop on the cock carousel, which is a very strong incentive for a man to date down in age if he can secure a girl before she ruins herself. Just out of curiosity, what are your respective ages?

Hey mate, thanks a lot I'm almost 10 years older than her, and I'm turning 34 next year. I met her when she was 22.5 going through her last undergraduate year at university.

To the other guys: I agree that generally Asian girls are a lot more feminine. The main reason is that their culture enables them to be so, and their family actively enforces it in most cases.

Also the language itself tends to be much more encouraging of respect, masculinity and femininity. I am from a Vietnamese background myself, and my wife can speak and write at an intermediate level now. That's something she willingly took up shortly after we started dating.

In fact, she's pretty much like an Asian girl, not a modern one but a vintage one, a remark that was made by older Asian women to me and to her many times. She speaks two Asian languages, dresses in traditional clothes at formal events, cooks, sews (makes her own and my clothes) etc. She even squats like one! Not just exercise squats, but just hanging out or doing work in the deep squat position like traditional Asians do. This is not me being lucky to find a woman with all of those, she desired to do them because she fully submits to me, and I taught her many of those skills myself.

There's also a precedent of this in my family. My uncle (mother's side) is married to a Polish woman and she gets the same praises, even from my grandmother and mother, who never compliment any woman. My wife happens to have Polish ancestry as well, and is the only young woman I've ever heard my mother praises.

That's why before I met my wife I was going to head to SEA and EE to find one. However, if you find yourself a good candidate, be prepared to lead and mould her into yours.

[John Michael Kane]

[quote]Quote:

Australia certainly seems similar to the United States in terms of finding diamonds in the rough. I don't think the average Western girl really realizes how much Western men value you feminity, which Asian girls, on average, nail to a T. Of all the girls I've dated, the most feminine and sweet girls were Asian.[/quote]

[quote]Quote:

Interesting observation about Asian women. What do you think are the main factors that compel them to be more feminine/sweet?[/quote]

I think there are a host of reasons. First off, Asian culture is more conformist in general compared to the West. In Asia, each Asian is generally speaking more encouraged to act as the "expected model" for what their specific country's ideals are. For instance, in Korea, that ideal is to try and get a great job and gain social status. The average Korean works hard to attain this. This conformity is encouraged in both men and women, but they manifest themselves in different ways.

Secondly, most Asian cultures are very heavily influenced by Confucianism, which places a heavy emphasis on male leadership.

Thirdly, there are many cultural examples in Asia where Asian girls are slut shamed. Did you sleep with a bad boy? Your mother or father might even call you a worthless slut. If an American girl does that, her father may just say she's exploring her personality. In short, men in Asia generally speaking have higher standards for women and their expectations. Where men set the bar high, women jump to meet it. Here in the West, we've celebrated fatties, we've hit on them in bars and generally speaking apologized for their sloppy behavior.

Furthermore, Asian parents tend to be very practical as a whole. If you want to find a good man they'll tell their daughters, consider a beta. Beta males, however boring at times, are the "safe" choice for many women. In general, because Asian cultures are more insular than Western ones, and less focused on individuality compared to the West, being a conformist and finding a good man isn't seen as a chore.

I think personally why so many Asian girls will consider foreign men (most specifically White, but not exclusively) is that they are generally seen as successful (parents will like them), and also that white men tend to be quite tall compared to Asian men. I'm 6'2" and have always had no problem attracting Asian girls. They've pointed out my height and strength as a reason for their attraction. When you look manly (height + muscles, or even just muscles), they respond positively which places them more in a submissive frame. One of my ex-gfs was a 95 lbs 5'0" Chinese girl. I'm twice her weight and many times her strength. When a woman has to crane her neck to look up to you, I think it really changes the dynamic, and instinctively brings out her feminine side. Not to say shorter guys can't do it too, but they will have to depend on personality moreso to set the frame instead of just size alone.

[quote] (12-15-2016 07:03 PM)StrikeBack Wrote:  

[quote='John Michael Kane' pid='1461375' dateline='1481357285']
Just finished reading your engagement thread, and now this one. Hats off to you, my good man. A combination of good fortune and setting up your ducks in a row to be attractive to the right kind of woman who is looking to be locked down. I'm 32 now and strongly believe that the best of wives marry very young. Women need a certain naive and warm view of love which becomes all but impossible if they hop on the cock carousel, which is a very strong incentive for a man to date down in age if he can secure a girl before she ruins herself. Just out of curiosity, what are your respective ages?[/quote]

[quote]Quote:

Hey mate, thanks a lot I'm almost 10 years older than her, and I'm turning 34 next year. I met her when she was 22.5 going through her last undergraduate year at university.[/quote]

Good catch. I honestly think the best ages for a woman to get married are between 18-23. There's lots of energy and joyful hopefulness that I find girls have at that age if they haven't been pumped and dumped. They are ripe for a benevolent alpha male to pluck them up and marry them.

[quote]Quote:

To the other guys: I agree that generally Asian girls are a lot more feminine. The main reason is that their culture enables them to be so, and their family actively enforces it in most cases.[/quote]

Strongly agree, as I wrote above.

[quote]Quote:

Also the language itself tends to be much more encouraging of respect, masculinity and femininity. I am from a Vietnamese background myself, and my wife can speak and write at an intermediate level now. That's something she willingly took up shortly after we started dating.[/quote]

Excellent point. I've worked with many Vietnamese Americans, many who are first-gen. These are tough, smart people by and large that suffered a lot to make their way to the United States. The average American is a softie compared to them. The Vietnamese language has tons of pronouns based upon both age and gender, which makes it difficult for a non-native to learn, but is extremely respectful when spoken. Reverence is paid to elders. Vietnamese language treats gender as a binary, as it ought to be. There is no "Zir" or other bullshit in Vietnamese.

[quote]Quote:

In fact, she's pretty much like an Asian girl, not a modern one but a vintage one, a remark that was made by older Asian women to me and to her many times. She speaks two Asian languages, dresses in traditional clothes at formal events, cooks, sews (makes her own and my clothes) etc. She even squats like one! Not just exercise squats, but just hanging out or doing work in the deep squat position like traditional Asians do. This is not me being lucky to find a woman with all of those, she desired to do them because she fully submits to me, and I taught her many of those skills myself.[/quote]

Non-Asian women are capable of femininity, but have to work harder to reach it because their larger host cultures are not conducive to it. To be a girly girl in the West, you are somewhat counter-cultural. As women prefer to act in concert with the prevailing norms, many girls fall prey to the ruling dictates of feminism. There is much beauty to be admired about Asian cultures, which is often lost on those in the West. Don't get me wrong, I think the West has the East beat in certain ways (creativity, science, classical music etc.) has a leg up in the grand schemes, but that doesn't mean that the East isn't without value. Far from it! Culturally speaking, they have by and large maintained better family structures, something I give Asian men writ large a huge thumbs up. I think if the average Western man wasn't such a pussy, the average Western woman would be more enjoyable. I think one of the reasons your marriage is on the right track is that your woman seems rather malleable. Men underestimate the value of this in a woman. Is she willing to learn from me? A woman that takes the shape of her man's helping hand is a happy woman. It is a woman in awe of her man, the way it ought to be, and is, providing you give her the reason to respect and follow you. This is also a function of a woman's age. A little bit of an age gap helps, but it also is very helpful when the woman is young.

[quote]Quote:

There's also a precedent of this in my family. My uncle (mother's side) is married to a Polish woman and she gets the same praises, even from my grandmother and mother, who never compliment any woman. My wife happens to have Polish ancestry as well, and is the only young woman I've ever heard my mother praises.[/quote]

Polish women are certainly very feminine. Used to work with quite a few of them. Some can be a bit wild, but by and large, they love the idea of home and hearth.

[quote]Quote:

That's why before I met my wife I was going to head to SEA and EE to find one. However, if you find yourself a good candidate, be prepared to lead and mould her into yours.[/quote]

Bingo. You have to be willing to take her on as your new student. One of the very first things I test a girl with to determine if she is LTR status worthy is to see if she is willing to form and learn from my expectations. Feminine women love it when men give them tasks to do, and they do it with joy. This doesn't mean being a bossy blowhard, but rather a certain charming warmth from a masculine man that gives her life purpose. Watch some classic American movies from the 1940's and 50's and you'll see lots of benevolent alpha characters who playfully tease and give their women instructions and purpose in life. Mold yourselves after those examples and you'll never fail to earn and keep a feminine woman's love.