[TheSlayer]

(08-18-2014 11:19 PM)Vacancier Permanent Wrote:  

Don't know if this is anecdotical or if there is anything more to it, but I've lived in Boretown for over 17 years and in that time frame, I can't count on one hand the number of Canadian friends. All my friends have been foreigners: Brasilians, Latinos, Russians, Japanese, Pinoys, Chinese, Arabs, Blacks from Africa, Blacks from the Caribbeans, French, Europeans, Indians, Pakis, Lebanese, Moroccans, Algerians, Germans, Tunisians, Egyptians, Balkans etc, but I can't recall having one single white Canadian friend in almost 2 decades of living in Toronto. I just can't recall any!

That's just mind blowing!

Anyone else has experienced the same?

Might be anecdotal, VP. I get what you are saying but I agree with Hank. Some of it depends on where you went to schools and stuff. Most of my closest friends are white Canadians (born in Canada) but I also have 2-3 close Indian/European friends.

rudebwoy touched on it. Toronto is tribal and I would guess so are a lot of "multi-cultural" cities but it depends on how outgoing you are as a person and on your own personality as well. You may not have white Canadian friends but you do seem to have a pretty diverse group of friends. That itself makes you different that most guys in Toronto/GTA.

OT - Given the number of immigrants here they probably find it easy to stick to their own kind but you have to get out of your comfort zone to meet different people. Most guys are simply not willing to do that, they are happy in their own little social circles.

[Vacancier Permanent]

Yeah I agree that TO is very tribal with everybody sticking with their own people, but i've always got along better with immigrants than white Canadians. I'm an immigrant myself (white), so that might have something to do with it.

As a comparison, I find people here in Edmonton way more friendlier. Actually the first thing you notice coming from a place like Toronto is how friendly and helpful the people here are. Had this conversation with an older guy who was originally from Toronto but moved here over 30 years ago. He said Edmonton is what Toronto was in the 70's in terms of the friendliness of people. I can see that and I believe him.

[scotian]

(08-19-2014 04:55 PM)Vacancier Permanent Wrote:  

Yeah I agree that TO is very tribal with everybody sticking with their own people, but i've always got along better with immigrants than white Canadians. I'm an immigrant myself (white), so that might have something to do with it.

As a comparison, I find people here in Edmonton way more friendlier. Actually the first thing you notice coming from a place like Toronto is how friendly and helpful the people here are. Had this conversation with an older guy who was originally from Toronto but moved here over 30 years ago. He said Edmonton is what Toronto was in the 70's in terms of the friendliness of people. I can see that and I believe him.

VP, you're white?

[Moma]

^^^^^

LOL!

[Vacancier Permanent]

Scotian,
There are numerous ways to classify people: skin color, race and nationality. When I said I was white I was referring to the skin color, not the race. Granted, I may not be gringo white but I'm Caucasian/Aryan. Hence white. Makes sense buddy?

[TravelerKai]

(08-19-2014 09:50 PM)Vacancier Permanent Wrote:  

Scotian,
There are numerous ways to classify people: skin color, race and nationality. When I said I was white I was referring to the skin color, not the race. Granted, I may not be gringo white but I'm Caucasian/Aryan. Hence white. Makes sense buddy?

I thought everyone here knew you were French. You're pulling for the French national soccer team during the world cup wasn't a good enough clue? I think you even said that was your home country in that thread.

[BadWolf]

Funny stuff.... well good news yesterday. On my forklift course this older white guy buys me a muffin and won't take any money for it. He had been a forklift driver his entire life. I didn't have the heart to tell him I made triple his wage just a few weeks previous. Sometimes I think its better to take a backseat and let others shine.

That being said, maybe its a class division... blue collar tends to be more friendly than the white collar university snobs around here. Also I got along with all the other races on the course, couple guys from India and Jamaica... I think I'm going to run an experiment and see how many blue collar vs white collar people I can get contact info from in any given place. Might have something to do with it.

[Deluge]

(08-19-2014 09:50 PM)Vacancier Permanent Wrote:  

Scotian,
There are numerous ways to classify people: skin color, race and nationality. When I said I was white I was referring to the skin color, not the race. Granted, I may not be gringo white but I'm Caucasian/Aryan. Hence white. Makes sense buddy?

VP, he was taking the pissing out of you.



Haven't you two even met in person?

[Handsome Creepy Eel]

Quote:

I'm just dumbfounded, what the hell... do introverts just not see the value in maintaining relationships or maybe I'm just crazy. Half of all my job opportunities came from my Magic group... extra work, contacts, visa stuff... and most of all companionship and camaraderie through the hard times, it was all so incredibly valuable in China, why let that die?

I can't speak for Magic because I never played it that much, but this is absolutely true for D&D. People have absolutely no concept of interpersonal relationships outside their own bubbles, and tend to be pretty socially retarded in general. Vendettas and grudges over tiniest things abound. I've once had a guy have a major meltdown and threaten to kill me because "No one tells him what the wizard class can or can't do".

[Menace]

No one puts Mordenkainen in the corner!

[TravelerKai]

(08-18-2014 02:58 AM)Deluge Wrote:  

@TravelerKai, it wasn't disingenuous at all. Your car club analogy isn't relevant, because you know the guys in the club already, while BadWolf is a total stranger. Is this card game really so rare that people will instantly want to give out their number and hangout with some random dude after 10 seconds into a conversation? Sounds like this guy already has people to play with. No doubt there are internet communities for this card game to find players too. I don't understand how some guys on RVF of all places don't see how ridiculous this all is.

You misread my post. My car club is relevant for two reasons. One the car we drive is was or is pretty rare. Two I used to approach strangers that are not members of my specific club or not part of any club at all but own that same car. I used that as an example because I actually know and understand Magic of the Gathering because I used to fucking play it. I used a car analogy hoping you could maybe understand a car better than some obscure card game you have never seen before. The fact that you and Pitt have no clue what it is, makes it very difficult for you two to understand the nature of these social interactions. Certain hobbies are rare in nature. That rarity makes social interactions different from some random cold approach. No one is cold selling anyone anything (like a cold dinner, a movie, and some warm fuck afterwards). This is about bumping into a person that is like 1 in 500,000 people or something like that and having a common interest. If that person cannot handle a simple conversation, that is not anyone's fault other than that poorly adjusted person's.

[TravelerKai]

(08-18-2014 08:03 PM)BadWolf Wrote:  

Situation #2.

Just happened.

At chapters looking in the movie section (Star Wars books), employee is walking past me and makes a comment about his favorite book being this book of SITH. I inquired as to why and we got into a discussion about Sith vs Jedi... then the movies, then the games... in total I sat there about 45 minutes discussing it. I then asked if he liked video games to which he replied he was a HUGE fan. I have a game for the cube called Rebel Strike (A coop STAR WARS flight sim) so I say to him:

"Hey man I've really enjoyed talking to you, would you like to exchange emails and we can play some games or continue our discussion about Star Wars/Trek later."

Hands raised in a 'surrender position'

Him: "No sorry, No No my wife doesn't allow me to give it out"

I said "You know, you're the second guy to say something like this, I ain't gay, I have a wife too, I just thought you might want to be friends... do I scare you?"

him: "No I just don't give out my email, really... my wife..."

me: "Isn't that strange do you think its just weird for our culture to do this? I always make friends this way in China and Mexico."

Him: "Yeah... you know I never really thought about it, I guess..."

so I expect him to run away or something... he stands there and then starts talking again about star wars..

I'm sitting there like WHAT THE FUCK!?!?! Getting uncomfortable, I said "uh listen I'm sure you got stuff to do your thermal detonator is going off 'his beeper was going off'... so as I was saying..."

Him: (Turns it off) He smiles and says: "No I have time they're fine, I'm the manager."

Me: (weirded out and interrupting his Star Wars story) "Uh so in China we usually share emails or whatever on skype to make friends, I have to go so are you sure you don't want to talk later?"

Him: "No I'm sure...."

He shook my hand [limp wristed] and I walked away AGAIN completely blown away. I wish there was a gif for the Death Star exploding, I would put it under here... I feel like that guy with the mind exploding pic.

Canadians explain this to me, there is something wrong with this society, this CAN'T be normal. I am an hour out of Toronto in a Univ town.

To the guys who have PM'd me, I think we should get together in TO, like a big meetup because I don't see myself having much luck making connections in the general population and I must be doing something wrong. I spoke to my local friends and they are as puzzled as I am but again they are introverts and have never attempted to bridge the gap in public. Despite these setbacks, I'm not changing my game, if I can meet even one person.... To me this is natural not forced, the interaction was initiated by HIM.

I knew that first situation was not just a one off. One thing you missed out on BW, when you were gone in the past 8 years or so, was that the "Nerd" and "Geek" community is chock full of FAT guys with low testosterone and Beta schulbs with no fucking balls that think it is funny and cute that their wives are worst than Chinese Tiger Wives. At least a Tiger Wife is just trying to take care of business. These ball busting women are so awful that is some of the reason most here are anti-marriage.

I got tons of stories like this.

One guy in my car club let his wife log into his forum account to tell us how much she hated his fucking car. She whined that it was too fast, too rough, and not luxury enough for her tastes (it did not have leather seats at that time). Then when we jumped all over her, he starts posting again trying to cover for her stupid posts. So we jumped him for being balless. Then she posted a picture of a Mercedes E350 claiming that she made him get rid of it and buy that Benz. She then said she just forced him into becoming a real man, and then called all of us little boys. Yeah as if little teenage boys can afford a 35-45,000 dollar sports car.... She even left us with a few F bombs.

Some guys see nothing wrong with being married to some ball busting cunt that acts like a PitBull. They have no shame nor care about being a man. I know betas that would not take shit off a bitch like this, but yet these kinds of Betas will.

In some ways they are the non-homo version of a sissy. During the Renaissance Festival/Fair, I will see more losers like this with out of control wives or girlfriends, and it seems like guys that have geek-like interests in cosplay/dressup/role-playing/comic stuff/Otaku-culture often end up with women like this.

I will also add something that will make you a little angry with me. Star Wars people are a special kind of loser. Stars Wars is bad enough as it is, but the fans are even worse. It's a hamster that few can completely understand. It's almost like a cult. In some ways, you were rolling the dice on a bad interaction, by even talking to people infatuated with Star Wars in the first place. I have better conversations with Jehovah's Witnesses than by talking to a "Wookie", a Jedi-wannabe, or whatever the fuck these people often call themselves.

[BadWolf]

Kai, I am also a HUGE Star Wars fan [originals], I guess it depends on what kind of fan you are.... ahhh MOST other Star Wars fans I run into are as you describe, social losers BUT they are nowhere NEAR as creepy as otaku. At least they are into something that doesn't involve little girls in revealing poses or women on throw pillows. I highly recommend everyone go to an Anime Con to see what I'm talking about. These are the fat bastards with spaghetti stained T-Shirts that will never come within 20 feet of a pussy or super nerds that make up the greater 'white knight clan'.

Thinking back, yeah you're right... approaching nerds is probably the wrong thing to do, I'm not sure why I was expecting a different class of person. The new 'nerd' is a total fuckin loser. I guess the celebrity status of being a foreigner in China has sort of gone to my head.

I often forget that the kind of guy it takes to get these women interested is not the 'nerd' personality. I love magic and gaming but I would never want a chick that was into those things, to me they are guy's hobbies ONLY. I remember at this one con in Guangzhou all the women were surrounding my wife and I when I posed with the cosplayers (I was just in regular gear and screwing around) and there were all these weird ass guys trying to take pics of the women we were with. I had loads of girls ask if I was single. I'm not an Anime fan myself but my wife is nuts for the ultra feminine stuff like this. She gets dressed up in all the clothes and watches cartoons pretty much all day long (even at her job). She watches Anime porno but thinks that male anime fans are weird/creepy/losers... hah, maybe my wife is also a social loser. If you were to change her into an American she'd be a shy, 300 pounder that dresses in sh1t she can't fit into, thank god for Chinese genes. She's never had a boyfriend and in a crowded room she's the girl in the corner with anime playing on her phone. I guess I harp on China alot but if you want a nerd girl, that actually looks and acts like an anime character then there is simply no better place to get one.

In the West, if you choose a girl that likes your hobbies you are looking at a warpig wife. The kinds that have strong opinions about gender dynamics in Sci-Fi's and sh1t like that. These are women who tell their husbands what to think, how to dress and who to vote for... Exactly like the guys from Renaissance fairs, guys who walk around in full battle gear but act like pussies in-front of their wives/girlfriends.

I had 2 friends who were otakus and both of their Chinese girlfriends were ball busting cunt bags that would tell them how to act, how not to cross them and what they were doing. The guys were always pretty envious of my wife, who acts like one of the chicks from their fandom, she is quiet, shy and wears the gothic lolita/cosplay type of stuff around town. The guys are generally awkward as hell, and cup their mouth everytime I say something 'non-pc' or if they do say something like 'bitch', they look around to see if any women are in earshot first. So yeah, I dunno what I was thinking... I guess I'm an anomaly in the matrix.

Lets get some pictures up of those guys eh... they make for hilarious commentary.