[Eirykr]

Got a question for you guys, as I'm torn on what to do here.

I'm supposed to meet up with this girl tomorrow night for drinks at a bar about five minute drive from my place. She's about 7/10, red head, and I've been out of the game for a while. Haven't met her in RL yet, but she is friend of a friend and we talked over text and decided to meet up.

Thing is she keeps bringing up her ex the past two times we texted. She is still living with him and is always bringing up how he is perfect for her etc. Another thing is that this guy apparently was the one who decided to take a break from her.

A big part of me is like, "Jesus, just shut the fuck up about this ex shit already", and I almost always give clipped, curt responses anytime she brings him up, then change subject, and just think about working toward the bang. Another part of me just wants to flake out on her, but like I said, I could use with shaking some rust off.

So, what would you do in this situation? Stay in for the bang, or delete? Worth noting she is in my loose circle of friends, so I don't know, maybe I could use her to get closer to her girlfriends?

[Christian McQueen]

More than likely it's a shit test.

Proceed like she doesn't have a BF and go for the bang first date.

If she brings her ex up again than say this:

"Doll I'm not your girlfriends and I don't want to hear about your ex. Got it?"

Her: blah blah blah

If she persists, walk out of the bar. Odds are she'll stfu up about her ex, but if she doesn't be prepared to walk.

[GoodTimer]

Since you've been out of the game for a while, definitely meet her, proceed like McQueen said. Spend little money. You have nothing to loose, but at a minimum you will gain some experience. It could be a wild card where you don't know what to expect; she could move to make her ex jealous and get with you. Or, you wind up walking out, in a cool alpha way. You may wind up "bumping" into her sometime later, she will respect.
I think there is a lot to be said for gaining experience out with woman (since you been out of game). If it sucks, you have a story to tell (another girl) of some "bitch" you met recently (don't sound heartbroken). The story alone will convey to the new girl that you don't accept stupid s##t. Also, use her as social proof.

[Handsome Creepy Eel]

I wouldn't get emotional about it, but I'd tease her unapologetically: "Hey we've just met and you're already bringing up your problems?"

[Wayout]

Back in the day I deal with this problem by " agree and amplify!"
Her: I really enjoyed cuddling with my ex
You: Yes, cuddling is the best! Do you want to go to my place and cuddle?

Her: I really like the way my ex dressed
You: Yes, it's important for a man to dress well! Lean in for a kiss.

This is obviously a situation with a very young girl with little experience in dating. More mature ones ( over 25) never bring this shit up! The main thing - don't react with anger. You can't be angry at a cute puppy who is trying to bite your foot!

[Farmageddon]

I disagree with the agree & amplify. It is appropriate for some situations but this is not one of them, in my opinion.

Christian is right, it is most likely a shit-test, so you should just completely ignore it and game like normal. I think your best response is a total non-response, basically ignore what she says and judge the situation by her actions. If she is still allowing you to escalate physically - do it in spite of what she says. Actions > Words.

The agree and amplify tactic would be useful after the bang if she keeps bringing up her ex-boyfriend and you want to nip it in the bud.

If she keeps bringing up her ex-bf and won't allow you to escalate physically - soft next her by disengaging; stop calling and texting her and only respond when she initiates contact. Then if that doesn't work - cut all contact and hard next her.

[Eirykr]

Update:

We actually went out tonight as she texted saying she was feeling lonely. I told her I was broke currently and would have to get her back another time. Told her to buy some potato skins, while she had some drinks (water for me.) We flirted a little at the bar where she started drawing cats on napkins, then I drew over her drawings, adding tits and pussy, etc. then told her I would sign it with my artistic signature so the waitress could have an original Eirykr.

This girl is a bit of a geeky, D&D-playing Ren Faire type. Kind've crazy redhead. Mentioned at one point in the night how she's been raped three times, how she trained MMA, blahblahblah. We got to talking about YouTube people and she invited me over to her place. First thing that hits me walking in the door is that the place reeks of cat urine. She has three cats, and invites one into her room with us. This is the same room she and her ex still sleep in together. There's a huge big-screen TV on their dresser. She invites me to sit in one of those rock-back floor chairs. I do for a minute, then shortly transition to sitting on the edge of the bed near her after a minute of playing with her cat.

At every opportunity I'm doing my best to escalate physically with this girl, because fuck, I'm in her house, in her bed. She continues to bring up her ex at every opportunity and how she's trying to win him back, I just dismiss this as wheel spinning and ignore it. I make fun of her dirty ass room in small ways, "Wow, you got peanut butter and jelly right here, and a spoon still covered in it. Sweet, you don't even need to get up." She gets self-conscious, gets up to clean up some, I open the door for her, touching her side. When she comes back in I pull her over to compare heights (I'm 5'10" and she's 5'9" or so but was wearing heels earlier), I joke about how she's lost her Amazonian powers and at my whim now. I ask her how much she weighs and she claims she's 110. I pick her up and spin her around. She's giggling along, but anytime I'm touching her she averts her eyes and gives off signals that she's uncomfortable. Not really giving me anything back. So I drop it.

She pulls out this leather collar with chains on it. I figure she wants to talk about it, so I ask. She mentions she made it herself. I go, "You're into that Master Slave stuff, huh?" to which she responds, "Well, I don't have a master anymore.." then some more shit about her Ex, fuck. So I start feeling like it's the place and the room just reminding her of him. Anything I'm doing is met with awkwardness and not the kind of throw-caution-to-the-wind horniness I'm expecting that'd made a girl fuck a strange guy in her ex's bed. So I start making excuses to head home, she makes an excuse about how yeah, those two drinks earlier have made her tired. Fake as fuck yawn. Then she says, "So we should hang out again tomorrow. I'll definitely be hungry later, and you do owe me now. Maybe meet up at the bar again."

Not being anybody's mealticket I say, "We'll go to my place next time and watch a movie. I'll get some beers for us." She seems enthusiastic about this, so maybe it is just the location.

Either way, I know I shouldn't be too frustrated about not getting a same-night bang after just now shaking the rust off, but I was getting major mixed signals. Getting invited back to her place, sitting right next to her in her bed and yet she shuts down every advance with awkwardness. I didn't want to push it though, because the thought of her rape claims and then the fact she is in my friends circle. But maybe that's just an excuse on my part for bitching out and not trying.

My friend who knows of this girl said she's pretty crazy and they've been trying to split her and her ex up for a few months now. Apparently she threatened to swallow two bottles of pills and kill herself if he left her, etc. She agreed to let him have an open relationship because she didn't have as high of a libido as him, supposedly.

Anyway, will try for the crazy firecrotch bang tomorrow and be more physically aggressive 'til she tells me no or shoves me off. Likewise I am going to shut down talk about the ex now, rather than just ignore it. Probably use Wayout's advice and use some of the topics she brings up to transition them to talking about the two of us.

I can tell this girl is lonely and needing a replacement alpha dick, so I'm happy to replace her nutty obsession toward mine. Especially a girl so willing to have an open relationship. Will keep updated.

[Farmageddon]

Dude this trick has a trillion red flags. Do you really need a bang this bad to risk all the shit that will invariably come with this idiot?

Constantly talking about her ex, rape claims, shitty - disgusting smelling house, suicide threats, etc. etc. etc.

I hate to break it to you but the bitch is crazy. She is obviously just using you for validation and attention because her ex-boyfriend isn't giving her any.

You need to hard next her and go find other girls. Not worth it IMO.

[iamdegaussed]

agree with last guy. Rape claims are a HARD next for any girl. She's just seeking attention/validation.

[funkyzeit]

Holy shit man, try one more time and then bail. Rape claims and "trying to win him over" means she's a psycho and she will bang him first time she sees him. Or she is banging him regularly and rationalizing it as "he needs time to get back to me".

[Wahawahwah]

Get. The. Fuck. Out.

Replacement Alpha Dick? No.

Think.... Venus Flytrap

[DJ-Matt]

Yeah I wouldn't try too hard, if the bang fails at your pad, next this bitch. I smell sexual abuse at a young age here. Does she have the "little girl voice" ?

[teh_skeeze]

This one isn't worth it. You would have gotten the bang if you went to your place instead. It's probably better that it went this way. If you stick your dick in this chick, your apartment is going to wind up smelling like cat piss with spoons of peanut butter and jelly on the floor.

[AneroidOcean]

(02-26-2014 11:44 PM)Eirykr Wrote:  

Update:

Don't walk, RUN from this situation. FUCK THAT!

[Snowplow]

Even when I was blue pill I could see all those red flags. GTFO and don't look back

[Christian McQueen]

One question?

Will you be able to get on RVF in jail?

I thought so.

Just stop for God's sake stop.

[Comte De St. Germain]

(02-28-2014 07:56 AM)Christian McQueen Wrote:  

One question?

Will you be able to get on RVF in jail?

I thought so.

Just stop for God's sake stop.

McQueen put it better than I could. GTFO NOW. If not you'll be in jail on false rape charges.

[big poppa]

Definite daddy issues

[Avarence]

(02-26-2014 11:44 PM)Eirykr Wrote:  

This girl is a bit of a geeky, D&D-playing Ren Faire type. Kind've crazy redhead. Mentioned at one point in the night how she's been raped three times, how she trained MMA, blahblahblah. We got to talking about YouTube people and she invited me over to her place. First thing that hits me walking in the door is that the place reeks of cat urine. She has three cats, and invites one into her room with us. This is the same room she and her ex still sleep in together. There's a huge big-screen TV on their dresser. She invites me to sit in one of those rock-back floor chairs. I do for a minute, then shortly transition to sitting on the edge of the bed near her after a minute of playing with her cat.

[Wayout]

I'd say consider yourself lucky nothing happened that night and got out. Don't come back to to her - you may not be lucky twice.
Her inviting you home is a definite GO sign. For some reason I felt this woman has rape fantasies. Especially with that leather collar thing she made herself...and her mentioning rape.

[Eirykr]

Didn't expect this much response to this situation.

Just to belay everyone's fears, I didn't meet up with her again. The rape claims, plus the general obsessiveness with her ex just made it not worth the risk.

Apparently her current boyfriend and his friends have been trying to pry her off of him for a while now, and she went to the hospital after downing two bottles of pills and needing to get her stomach pumped shortly after the break up. So yeah, she's totally bonkers.

[Vaun]

More could be said here about red flags. Many of us here would have avoided some of the bigger problems we have faced if we could have recognized what we were getting ourselves into. Consider yourself lucky.

[Farmageddon]

Quote:

Just to belay everyone's fears, I didn't meet up with her again. The rape claims, plus the general obsessiveness with her ex just made it not worth the risk.

Awesome. You made the right choice. She was definitely not worth it. The mindset we try to preach around here is one of abundance. You should spread out your attention and try to game many girls, so that if you lose one, it doesn't sting that much and you have others to fall back on.

I'm not sure if you have ever read "The Sixteen Commandments of Poon" by Roissy aka the Heartiste, but rule number 7 is:

VII. Always keep two in the kitty

Never allow yourself to be a “kept man”. A man with options is a man without need. It builds confidence and encourages boldness with women if there is another woman, a safety net, to catch you in case you slip and risk a breakup, divorce, or a lost prospect, leading to loneliness and a grinding dry spell. A woman knows once she has slept with a man she has abdicated a measure of her power; when she has fallen in love with him she has surrendered nearly all of it. But love is ephemeral and with time she may rediscover her power and threaten to leave you. It is her final trump card. Withdrawing all her love and all her body in an instant will rend your soul if you are faced with contemplating the empty abyss alone. Knowing there is another you can turn to for affection will fortify your will and satisfy your manhood.

"The Sixteen Commandments of Poon"
http://heartiste.wordpress.com/the-sixte...s-of-poon/

[Comte De St. Germain]

http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2008/09/1...s-fatales/
Another article from Heartiste/Roissey I would use. I have fallen for a couple of these and they were among the hottest women I was with.

[robreke]

Girl I'd been banging pretty heavy a few months ago....we recently rekindled with another 'first date' She told me a few days after this date via text that she was going to decide between me and her 'long time ex' over the weekend. I texted her to do that on Friday and she said that was fair and she was going to think about it.

Mainly want to keep her to bang....but also would do a mini relationship with her cause she's cool. So...last time we texted was Saturday...two days ago. Thing is....her ex lives out of town about 90 minutes away and I live here in town with her.

she says she's still crazy about me, respects me a lot, enjoys every minute with me yada yada.

I haven't heard from her since Saturday.....some quick bantering texts between us.

I am thinking about texting her today or tomorrow....just to see if I can go over to her place to get close to her and "move her in my direction". Or should I just not contact her at all and wait to hear from her? I'm kind of thinking if I don't take action and go seduce her she'll drift to this guy she's got more history with.