[AneroidOcean]

Like many guys have said, if there's just a completely stellar girl that I have great chemistry with, I wouldn't be completely averse to a relationship. However, I have realized that this may be very unlikely at best, and a pipe dream at worst.

Thing is, it doesn't really matter to me, because what I'm doing now (soft harem) coupled with pursuing new girls is what's going to find me that girl anyway, if she does exist.

Even so, if I find a girl, the marriage laws/courts in my area are especially set against men, so I doubt I'd ever get married. There's just no benefit to me.

I've been the guy who gave selflessly in a relationship and received the short end of the stick. No more. I've realized all women's true nature is nearly the opposite of what I was told growing up.

Had to go with bangs as it's the best option that describes my outlook, even though I am in multiple relationships of some level.

[Avarence]

(02-26-2013 03:56 PM)AneroidOcean Wrote:  

Like many guys have said, if there's just a completely stellar girl that I have great chemistry with, I wouldn't be completely averse to a relationship. However, I have realized that this may be very unlikely at best, and a pipe dream at worst.

Thing is, it doesn't really matter to me, because what I'm doing now (soft harem) coupled with pursuing new girls is what's going to find me that girl anyway, if she does exist.

Couldn't have said it any better myself. This is how I feel.
I had to go with Bangs, because of the thrill I feel when playing the game. I'd had settled down (not a relationship) with a girl who's convenient - she lives in my apartment building on campus and likes to have sex all the time. I recently banged another girl (hotel bathroom ONS) and ever since then I've totally snapped out of the state I was in previously. Now I want more and more bangs, and my confidence is at an all-time high.

If I'm dating a girl - I think she will need to be a 9 or 10 and have all the personality traits I like. Otherwise, I'm eventually going to get sick of her and want to see how much I can improve my game and what more attractive girls I can get.

Ideally, game will land me the dream girl I mentioned above at some point. But I don't think I'm interested in anything but lots of bangs, right now. (I'm only 21)

[Samseau]

Only two things can happen in a relationship:

1. You break up

2. You get married


Knowing that option 1 is the best option, why would anyone be opposed to staying in the game?

[Nomad77]

@Samseau No one is claiming you don't need the game or "staying in the game". The question is: how to do use it and to achieve what? Do you use to get a great woman and a great relationship for a as long as it last or do you use it try and get a bunch of SNLs. Even in a relationship you are always in the game and need game to some degree. There is no faster way to lose a relationship and great woman than becoming a beta chump.

[snoop]

(02-26-2013 03:49 PM)Nomad77 Wrote:  

Again, I feel compelled to clarify some things here:

1. By relationship I am not talking about a lifetime here. A relationship can last from a few months to years. When it stops working, start a new one.

2. I am not talking about a bad relationship or a messed up woman. Obviously, either of those is going to be worse than having no relationship.

3. Whoever believes that being in a good LTR requires more work or just as much as going out gaming most of the week either has never been in a good LTR or is Don Juan/Casanova resurrected.

If you don't have fun gaming chicks, why the bloody hell are you even doing it?

[Nomad77]

Oh, I enjoy it. You need game to get and keep a woman. Whether its for one night or one year. Personally, I am not a big fan of ONS. I prefer to have some kind of emotional connection with the women I have sex with and I have a feeling that most men do too.

Banging a lot of different girls is a fantasy sort of like the three-some. We are told by society that this is what we should aspire to, that is the top of the pleasure chain. The same way college kids are conditioned to believe that Party X is the ultimate party and that is what they should be doing in college. That these things will make us happy but for most men it won't.

I have no issue with Game. The point of this thread is what do you do with it.

[Hotwheels]

Right now I could go for a live in to take care of my sick ass.....

Otherwise? nah....

[WestCoast]

(02-26-2013 07:09 PM)Nomad77 Wrote:  

Oh, I enjoy it. You need game to get and keep a woman. Whether its for one night or one year. Personally, I am not a big fan of ONS. I prefer to have some kind of emotional connection with the women I have sex with and I have a feeling that most men do too.

Banging a lot of different girls is a fantasy sort of like the three-some. We are told by society that this is what we should aspire to, that is the top of the pleasure chain. The same way college kids are conditioned to believe that Party X is the ultimate party and that is what they should be doing in college. That these things will make us happy but for most men it won't.

I have no issue with Game. The point of this thread is what do you do with it.

Ha this explains our discrepancy.

I have no interest in a emotional connection and highly prefer one night stands.

The only thing I want to know is if she is good in bed. Beyond that the only ratio that matters is cost and time per repeat bang... Gotta think long-term.

Every year the interest in connections actually declines... That or I'm becoming a horrible person. Oh well!

[Nomad77]

No, I have a friend that is like that - different stokes for different folks. I told him he should go to a cold European country where the women show very little emotions. Yes, but you can't know IF a girl is good in bed until you get here there and that comes AFTER all of the hard work. Even then, most girls are not going to be that comfortable the first time unless they are really buzzed.

Don't get me wrong, I like good sex and I am not going to turn down a ONS with a decent girl IF it drops in my lap BUT my preference are relationships.

[AneroidOcean]

(02-26-2013 07:20 PM)WestCoast Wrote:  

Ha this explains our discrepancy.

I have no interest in a emotional connection and highly prefer one night stands.

The only thing I want to know is if she is good in bed. Beyond that the only ratio that matters is cost and time per repeat bang... Gotta think long-term.

Every year the interest in connections actually declines... That or I'm becoming a horrible person. Oh well!

I find that the absolute best sex (for me) is with girls that I am not only intensely physically attracted to, but also with which I have a significant connection. This doesn't mean I have to be in love with them, but I also like having sex with a girl more than one time if they are submissive, feminine, and fun to be around. I don't have anything against one night stands, but it's always a little puzzling that it seems like more than a few guys on here look past having sex with a girl you have some level of relationship with (friends with benefits being an example). It leads me to believe that the one night stands are alcohol fueled and/or their standards were lower just to get laid and that's why they'll never see the girl again.

The me of blue pills days would probably be at least a little disturbed by the me of today, though, and the discrepancy is going to get worse, not better, and I'm fine with it.

[WestCoast]

(02-26-2013 07:37 PM)AneroidOcean Wrote:  

(02-26-2013 07:20 PM)WestCoast Wrote:  

Ha this explains our discrepancy.

I have no interest in a emotional connection and highly prefer one night stands.

The only thing I want to know is if she is good in bed. Beyond that the only ratio that matters is cost and time per repeat bang... Gotta think long-term.

Every year the interest in connections actually declines... That or I'm becoming a horrible person. Oh well!

I find that the absolute best sex (for me) is with girls that I am not only intensely physically attracted to, but also with which I have a significant connection. This doesn't mean I have to be in love with them, but I also like having sex with a girl more than one time if they are submissive, feminine, and fun to be around. I don't have anything against one night stands, but it's always a little puzzling that it seems like more than a few guys on here look past having sex with a girl you have some level of relationship with (friends with benefits being an example). It leads me to believe that the one night stands are alcohol fueled and/or their standards were lower just to get laid and that's why they'll never see the girl again.

The me of blue pills days would probably be at least a little disturbed by the me of today, though, and the discrepancy is going to get worse, not better, and I'm fine with it.

Nah it's not like you just curb the bitch ASAP. It's more just cost analysis, even friends with benefits take some maintenance. If your life is well together girls do not like the FWB for very long at all and try to rope you in. Fast.

[Nomad77]

As a society, men here, are conditioned to believe that the ONS and three-some are the pinnacle of sex. You don't find this mentally that much outside of the US. In Europe and South America, where I have lived, you don't find guys looking for this so much.

I have a feeling a lot of younger (under 25) guys are not going to be willing to admit that to this even after having ONS and three-somes. The same way they may not want to admit to not liking beer or smoking. It would just make them seem uncool to their peers.

[soup]

Yes, but threesomes can actually feel more monogamous than a twosome.

I have great moments of connectivity with girls through threesomes. These were on par with some of the best passionate/loving sex I've had, and are some of my strongest memories.

[Nomad77]

Threesomes can work IF everyone involved is equally attracted to and feel connected with each other. Usually, what happens is that you are will find one of the girls more attractive than the other and the other will know this right away. This will create some friction in the encounter because someone will have to take 2nd place.

Personally, I like to focus on what I am doing. I don't want another girl or guy distracting me when I am banging a girl I am really into. But that's just me, I'm not big into group sports. I once had a 5-some and my only memory of it is body parts everywhere. I don't even know what I did with who.

[tiggaling]

I feel kind of disappointed by men in general and how they compromise.

I do think men are looking for the affection and consistent sex a LTR can offer.

However, I think there is something special about the chemistry of a new partner, and something about diversity in sexual diet that is really necessary.

I don't think the only way is to be a "stone cold" player, as if that was something to be proud of.

I can't claim to have worked it all out, but I'm sure as seeing what really works and doesn't work for me.

For, sure, I'm not settling with the first 9/10 that comes along (why bother with an 8?), even if she wants to. And 9's and 10's are in my orbit...

Sexuality/sensuality is an art and a science, and must be practised. I think there is much that is essential in seducing women that most men seem to be missing and not getting ; at least that is how it seems to me, which the exception of a few posters here.

[big poppa]

If I'm with a girl that I like and have a connection with, I'm not one to go around screwing other girls at the same time.

For me, the best thing about learning game is that I can pick up on signs as to whether or not a girl is trustworthy and worthy of staying committed to (which I would put at roughly 15% of women). Then you gotta narrow that 15% to the ones that are at least a 7.5 on the looks scale.

I don't quite have the notch tally that a lot of you guys do, but I think I am happier being with a nice attractive girl who treats me well than going out banging club sluts each weekend. As long as I'm enjoying the relationship, I stick around.. When my interest starts to decline, I take the lessons I learned from her and move on to someone better.

[Nomad77]

(02-26-2013 08:38 PM)tiggaling Wrote:  

Sexuality/sensuality is an art and a science, and must be practised. I think there is much that is essential in seducing women that most men seem to be missing and not getting ; at least that is how it seems to me, which the exception of a few posters here.

This is my biggest complain about women today. They don't know how to be sensual anymore. To get some sensuality I have to go to Brazil.

[thegmanifesto]

(02-26-2013 09:01 PM)Nomad77 Wrote:  

(02-26-2013 08:38 PM)tiggaling Wrote:  

Sexuality/sensuality is an art and a science, and must be practised. I think there is much that is essential in seducing women that most men seem to be missing and not getting ; at least that is how it seems to me, which the exception of a few posters here.

This is my biggest complain about women today. They don't know how to be sensual anymore. To get some sensuality I have to go to Brazil.

Nomad,

Don't you live in Miami?

You don't find any "sensuality" there?

[Nomad77]

G, yes I live in Miami, and I can find some sensuality here IF I get them within 6 months of arriving here. Once a Brasilian girl has been here for more than 6 months, she starts acting like her American friends to fit in. And yes, Latin girls are more sensual than American and European girls BUT compared to the original shit in South America, there's no comparison! If I had never lived in Brasil, I would be a much happier man now

[thegmanifesto]

(02-26-2013 09:11 PM)Nomad77 Wrote:  

G, yes I live in Miami, and I can find some sensuality here IF I get them within 6 months of arriving here. Once a Brasilian girl has been here for more than 6 months, she starts acting like her American friends to fit in. And yes, Latin girls are more sensual than American and European girls BUT compared to the original shit in South America, there's no comparison! If I had never lived in Brasil, I would be a much happier man now

Interesting take.

I don't really see that much difference between a Costena, Calena or Rolla in Miami and one in Colombia.

[Christian McQueen]

(02-26-2013 12:15 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

(02-26-2013 11:39 AM)WestCoast Wrote:  

(02-26-2013 10:59 AM)theIVth Wrote:  

I think the average to above average guy that didnt start out at the bottom of the totem pole: the guy who could always get some female attention, always had girls flirting with him, was reasonably popular, played sports, well rounded etc, gets tired of chasing women after a while.

If you've been dealing with girls since you were around 13 or 14- kissing them, fingering them, smashing them, running trains on them, getting drunk with them, partying with them, vibing with them, getting dissed by them, getting rumors started about you by them, smashing their best friend or sister etc, you can only progress in life to eventually finding one that you want to settle down with at some point. Shit gets old after a while. Cause like I said, most guys are not smashing straight dimes every night. A true 8 or 9 coming around that wants to fuck with you is rare for the average man. Dealing with average to cute chicks gets stale after so many years.

Im 29 and Ive dealt with all kinds of women in all kinds of scenarios and relationships. Eventually your interests turns to other things like wanting to start a business or get into real estate or start messing with the stock market or whatever. Stuff that requires dedication and focus and time. Chasing women, going out 3 to 4 nights a week, constantly pressuring yourself to holler at every decent looking chick you see, always having to be on every time you leave the house gets tiring after a while. Ive been doing that since I was like 15.

I guess you just mature after a while and your able to say "ive been there and done that."

I don't know how all that experience would make you want to settle down? If anything it makes you realize settling down is a complete and utter waste of time. Sleeping with girls with boyfriends, girls that are married, seeing your top wingman sleep with a girl on her engagement day while you're banging her friend in the house, seeing all your older buddies get cheated on and seeing them cheat on their wives? Not sure how that makes sense.

Another overlooked point is getting good at cold approaching makes your social skills improve substantially, you can game your boss/office to get promotions. It's significantly harder to convince a stranger to trust you than a direct reference so when you game your office and also have a rec to back you it's like shooting fish in a barrel.

With that said I agree that your major focus in life should not be chasing tail, but that last leap of faith is tough...

Everyone has their own sliding scale of 1 sight versus two sevens or whatever the hell, but settle down? That's like shoving all your hard work down the toilet in a 50/50 bet where there is only downside. No thanks to that one, I'd rather risk being "old and bitter" since that's the argument all my loser colleagues use when they hit 35 and look 47 down $500K in assets from a divorce... Or two.

As the saying goes, "who do you trust?"... "Who do I trust... Me that's fucking who" is the only answer.

True.

Quote:

Chasing women, going out 3 to 4 nights a week

But here is the thing, some of us actually enjoy seducing women.

Exactly. Some dudes play golf. I game women. It's as legitimate a hobby as hitting a ball into a hole. To each their own.

[Christian McQueen]

(02-26-2013 08:38 PM)tiggaling Wrote:  

I feel kind of disappointed by men in general and how they compromise.

I do think men are looking for the affection and consistent sex a LTR can offer.

However, I think there is something special about the chemistry of a new partner, and something about diversity in sexual diet that is really necessary.

I don't think the only way is to be a "stone cold" player, as if that was something to be proud of.

I can't claim to have worked it all out, but I'm sure as seeing what really works and doesn't work for me.

For, sure, I'm not settling with the first 9/10 that comes along (why bother with an 8?), even if she wants to. And 9's and 10's are in my orbit...

Sexuality/sensuality is an art and a science, and must be practised. I think there is much that is essential in seducing women that most men seem to be missing and not getting ; at least that is how it seems to me, which the exception of a few posters here.

Something about your post strikes me that you are a woman...

[Nonpareil]

A) Your married or attached in some way friend tells you, 'You're so lucky you're single.'

or

B) You tell your married or attached friends, 'You're lucky to have her.'


What happens more often?


I've had some fine relationships too, but it's just not where I'm at right now; I'm not going to take myself out of the game for an indefinite period of time on an endeavor that's just going to end up being unfair to the girl, but I also know that to meet and attract that girl who I would want to have a relationship, I'll need to game her first.

It's why I don't get these 25-30 year old guys and 18-22 year old girls who shackle themselves into LTRs with people that they know they won't end up marrying; you only live once, and you're only young for a fraction of that time.

[Moma]

(02-26-2013 06:43 PM)snoop Wrote:  

(02-26-2013 03:49 PM)Nomad77 Wrote:  

Again, I feel compelled to clarify some things here:

1. By relationship I am not talking about a lifetime here. A relationship can last from a few months to years. When it stops working, start a new one.

2. I am not talking about a bad relationship or a messed up woman. Obviously, either of those is going to be worse than having no relationship.

3. Whoever believes that being in a good LTR requires more work or just as much as going out gaming most of the week either has never been in a good LTR or is Don Juan/Casanova resurrected.

If you don't have fun gaming chicks, why the bloody hell are you even doing it?

Because the rewards outweigh the effort. Anytime the reward in anything outweighs the effort, go for it.

Do I like going to 'work'? Not consistently. Do I like to going to the gym and busting my azz with heavy weights? Not always.

Do I like seeing a healthy bank account balance? Fcuk yea. Do I like having a higher close rate from having a swole physique and also deterring opportunists from trying shyt? Of course.

Sometimes in life we gotta do what we gotta to get what we want.

[CtrlAltElite]

(02-24-2013 10:40 PM)Nomad77 Wrote:  

I agree, banging a lot of the chicks is the fantasy but a girlfriend is really what they want. At least it is for all of my guy friends and none are really beta. The question then becomes: what is the optimal game for finding, getting, and keeping such a woman. Has to be quite different than the game used to get a lot of bangs.

While this may be true, I've read on Roissy that for all intents and purposes, the optimal game is the SNL game. He reasons that you can you can turn a SNL into a LTR, but not vice versa. The way I see it, since you're already attractive to her, with a bit of LTR game tossed in, she could see you as high value and desirable in the long run, facilitating an LTR.

I speak from theory though.

Edit: Samseau also posted about this.