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Which has been your worst "female hygiene" surprise?
12-30-2013, 11:07 AM
THe only more egregious hygiene issue would be if a girl had some kind of visible disease or if she had another man's cum or condom in any of her orifices. Imagine you are eating out a girl and some other guy's cum drips into your mouth.. then a condom falls out of her pussy.
Also, when it comes to smells, I get grossed out by a lot of perfume that girls wear. To me Patchouly is just as offensive as a stinky pussy. There are other tacky perfumes. It's nasty.
Garlic/meat breath is bad.
Armpit hair and pit stains kill my boner fast.
I think we've covered everything short of worms or other infestations.
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Which has been your worst "female hygiene" surprise?
12-30-2013, 11:43 AM
Not necessarily hygiene related but I guess feces doesn't bother me as much as it does others.
Went out with a Chinese national in the states for school. She wanted to go get Chinese food so we went to some little joint in a strip mall. She orders a fucking plate of intestines and a plate if kidneys. I was so disgusted watching her eat those intestines like I can not even express. I ordered kung pao beef and she's wrinkling her nose at it and says "that's not real Chinese food." I point at what's on her plate and say "that's not real food." Unsuprisingly her breath smelled like shit and she wouldn't chew gum because she thought it would make the muscles in her cheeks bigger.
Never saw her again.
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Which has been your worst "female hygiene" surprise?
02-11-2014, 03:42 PM
Buddy of mine was doing this chick. They had been going at it and he was about to finish when all of the sudden a foul stench of death starts emanating from the sheets. Room-clearing stench, like a cross between Indian food and a landfill. It makes him retch. He leaves the room. When he returns, there is brown discharge on the bed. Not poop, but after some investigation it turns out she had stuck two tampon up her cooch the week before when she had her period and left one in.
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Which has been your worst "female hygiene" surprise?
02-12-2014, 12:10 AM
Interesting story here...
A few weeks into this abroad trip I found myself banging this German girl. Decent, maybe a 6 or 7, nothing to be ashamed of and nothing to be proud of. I finish, assume everything is alright. Mind you, the room is quite dark. I roll over after she gets up, and she looks at the bed and curses something in German and says to me:
"You probably shouldn't lay there."
Me, being drunk, said why. Worst mistake of my life.
I was lying in a pool of blood and my entire left side was covered.
Apparently she had some sort of heavy flow.
In my entire life I have never been so mortified. The worst part about it is that I had no washing machine so she had to take the sheets back to hers, and I didn't have spare sheets so I was forced to sleep in my sleeping bag. Double whammy.
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Which has been your worst "female hygiene" surprise?
02-12-2014, 07:52 AM
Was ready to start going down on this petite chick with glorious disproportionately large tits. Spent a bit of time kissing her tits then starting kissing her belly and moving south... until her I came to her bellybutton. It had this yellow fungal-like crusty growth around it. I almost retched, and I'm like a deer trapped in a canyon - not sure which way to go. If I went any further south there could be even greater horrors. I never did go down on her.
One chick gave me such a rough handjob that I was pissing blood the morning after. I was in a different non-English speaking country and staying at her family's place, and I dreaded trying to explain why I needed a doctor to her father or mother if the pissing blood continued. Fortunately it happened just the once.
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Which has been your worst "female hygiene" surprise?
02-12-2014, 11:41 AM
Went for oral. Saw green shit. Looked like fungus.
Did not continue.
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Which has been your worst "female hygiene" surprise?
08-27-2014, 02:55 PM
Why does period blood smell so repulsive?
Also, this thread gave me ptsd
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Which has been your worst "female hygiene" surprise?
08-27-2014, 03:05 PM
This one let out a silent killer when I hit it from behind. The poopy stink lingered for a good 8 seconds. My ancestors are smiling down on me from heaven.
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Which has been your worst "female hygiene" surprise?
08-29-2014, 06:54 PM
Oh, scrap all that. That was bad, but it was nothing compared to this.
Strap in:
My mate and me used to go out as a team. You know how it works. I was the better looking/more charming sort so he got the tugs most of the time. But on this occassion he pulled a stonker. They were sisters. For real.
Having said that, the lady I pulled was top drawer 9/10 material. (her sister)
Only problem was.. and there is no way to put too fine a point on it... she stank of high grade BO. Yup - the really bad one. And she was KILLER looking. My God (rigsby quote there) she was a stunner.
I've made my point. I could go on at length about it all, but who cares?
I dumped her after two days.
I totally understand when women say 'he didn't smell that good'.
And the funny thing is, the rest of the guys in the club were 'Daggers' you know. So jealous.
Little did they know.
No way did I want to find out further with this chick. And she was a nice girl too. But fuck....
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Which has been your worst "female hygiene" surprise?
08-29-2014, 07:13 PM
What kind of sample sizes are you guys dealing with? I've never even heard of a single horror story in real life like anything here. Particularly college-age American women, they are so determined to be on top of their hygiene and are actively paranoid of something like traces of shit or the period freaking out the guy.
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Which has been your worst "female hygiene" surprise?
08-29-2014, 07:34 PM
I got two.
Worst smell was from a significantly older woman. Beware the cougars! She was pretty high up in the education bureaucracy, said she was 34. I'd say for sure under 40. I think I was twenty at the time. A bit of a "Mrs. Robinson" situation. Granted it was not bad enough for me to never hit it again, but again was a damn dirty dog. I met her at a rave. My first text, credit to my roommate at the time, was "Get the fuck over here. We're having a coked out midget orgy and we need a photographer!"
She didn't come over the night I met her (probably a good thing, given the smell at seemingly her best of times) but I donned the name Midget Fucker among her and her friends. These older teacher/administrator types sure are freaks, I'll tell you what.
Another time I banged my GF (at the time) after some club or rave, I don't remember which. She didn't go to clean herself up before going to bed with me, maybe she thought we were just going to sleep. She should have known me better than that, no matter how tired she was. Anyhow, she had a serious surplus of something. I'm trying to google right now just what the hell it was. All along I thought douche was both a verb and a noun, that women douche to clean out the douche in their vaginas. I don't know. But I had this stuff all over myself and I definitely went to rinse off afterwards. I can only imagine her horror when she went to the bathroom in the morning. Neither of us ever said anything. Aside from this one time, she had a nice-smelling, feeling, and looking vag.
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Which has been your worst "female hygiene" surprise?
08-30-2014, 07:34 AM
Can you ever subtract a notch?
Warning signs need to be put on doggy style.
Was going fine till I went for the ol' doggy and her ass smell hit me and my dick did a high dive off the 'fuck that' ledge.
I literally faked cramp and telling her the pussy was too tight and made my dick deflate. Plus she snored and I kept waking her up to stop. What a cunt.
WASH YOUR FUCKING ASSHOLE/CRACK. Not hard.
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Which has been your worst "female hygiene" surprise?
08-30-2014, 05:10 PM
If I ever pedestalize a girl again, I am going to read this thread as a reminder that girls fart, shit, and have funky stuff coming out of their pussies.
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Which has been your worst "female hygiene" surprise?
08-30-2014, 09:45 PM
Thathe can be normal discharge.
Remember guys a woman's vag is the waste disposal chute for a self cleaning oven.
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Which has been your worst "female hygiene" surprise?
08-30-2014, 10:14 PM
Quote: (08-29-2014 07:34 PM)Moto Wrote:
I got two.
Worst smell was from a significantly older woman.
That's the reason why I can't really do older women. I can smell the age on'em.
Yech.
Wald
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Which has been your worst "female hygiene" surprise?
09-23-2015, 12:15 AM
Once, in college, I had worked this chick all night and got her back to my place. I had worked her hard at this frat party and she'd let me feel her up, etc., so I thought I knew what I was getting into. Well, either the lighting was bad at the frat house, or I had been too shit faced to notice, but when she lifted her blouse, her fucking chest was almost as hairy as mine! That did more to tame my hard-on than any case of whiskey dick! I wouldn't even let her blow me because my mood had been ruined.