Quote: (10-02-2012 05:25 PM)murrb Wrote:
While in Thailand say you meet a nice thai girl you like and start hanging out are you always expected to pay for everything? Do all the women from thailand just look at white tourists as a paycheck now?
I have been on thaifriendly and wasn't sure if alot of the girls on there are just gaming you for a paycheck or actually might like you?
No, they aren't all looking at us as a paycheck, but as a rule of thumb, you're dating in a conservative society where men have the power and the money - you're therefore expected to pay for drinks and food on dates. As some others noted, many Thai girls will offer to split the bill these days if for no other reason than simply to show you they aren't using you (they know the stigma that comes with thai women who date white guys all too well). I think it also gives them a little assurance that you won't "expect" anything out of them.
The ones with a little money will often even pay for the whole meal, etc.
I'm pretty fierce about not paying for women's drinks or meals, etc, unless we're dating and I make more money. In Thailand, I learned quick it was best to give that rule a pass as it wasn't doing me any favors.
One even wined me, dined me, took me to an "hourly" hotel, and tried to give me money. I was broke and wasn't going to come home with her so she totally pimped my ghetto ass out. She worked in a pharmacy and did not have that much money. Funny shit.
Another rich Thai had a crush on me and took me to a private party at her house where she kept me full on german and belgian ales. I denied her on the basis of her being horizontally challenged but we stayed friends. She ended up buying her new bf a restaurant and a bar.
Another girlfriend of mine was really poor making about $150 a month and sending back half to her family in the mountains. She borrowed 1000 baht off me one time for her trip home to visit, and I never expected to see it again. Sure enough, as soon as I picked her up for dinner when she got home she handed me a crisp bill.
Point being that just like any country there's different strokes for different folks. My experience is that being a gentleman in Thailand goes a long way, unlike here in the states.
As far as the money thing goes - just use common sense. I don't know if meeting women on dating sites is the best way to go when avoiding the diggers though.
Quote: (10-02-2012 05:39 PM)RioNomad Wrote:
In 9ish months in Thailand, I never felt like any girl was using me for my money. I did however have one girl steal about 1,500 baht from me. This chick was a school teacher at an international school, kindergarten I believe, spoke fluent English, went to a good University, and her family had money. She stole money from me because she's a piece of shit, not because I'm white, and not because she actaully needed it. I met her at an expat bar in Silom, not online.
I would say for a young, good looking guy, most chicks on TF are looking to have a bit of fun and get laid. Not so much looking for a paycheck.
I had one drug me and leave lying naked on a bed once with the door wide open. well played, I say.
Quote: (10-04-2012 01:28 AM)RichieP Wrote:
As an aside, Im getting pretty bored of them lol. no sensuality or kinkiness, no fire in their hearts, no depth.. love simple jokes, iphones and.. well I dont know what else, nothing really. Eating, I guess. Not all of them, of course, but those seem to be the general tendencies. Im thinking Korean and Chinese/Taiwanese might be my favourite asians overall. (japs are exciting too, but can be just too odd sometimes).
This frustrated me with Thais as well. They're not the best in bed, to be honest. One girl had a smoking body and was probably the best lay of my life, but it took rolling my nuts on the table quite a few times to come across her.
One thing I do like about them is that there's a lot of room to "train" them in bed. I think of it as I'm starting off with a blank slate that can be molded as I see fit. They definitely aim to please their men.
Also, when they start getting into being a little kinky, they seem to always always want sex. My last gf there didn't even drink - little devout Buddhist cutie. I think she'd only had sex with one guy before and it showed in bed, but once she caught on, she wanted it three times a day and this went on the whole year we were together. Sometimes I just didn't have the energy. lol
Quote: (10-04-2012 11:31 AM)IainMuirs Wrote:
A lot of Thai girls don't really seem to have any interests or hobbies. You ask them what they like to do and it's the same response from everyone of them "shopping, movies, hanging with friends, internet". They tend to only like Thai food, with Korean or Japanese being the exception. They are quite clueless about what going on outside of Thailand...even inside of Thailand sometimes.
I've met seemingly educated Thais who don't even know where the Philippines is.
That said, I find the most interesting girls there are the ones who've studied in America. More hobbies. More to talk about. Probably more open for casual sex.
Quote: (10-06-2012 01:46 AM)murrb Wrote:
I was reading on lonely planet forums and a few people were saying that all the thai women will charge you no matter what.
How can you make it clear ahead of time that you aren't here to pay for sex without being a total asshole?
Rule #1: Don't get dating advice from forums like Lonely Planet.
If you're in a bar that is frequented by prostitutes and some girl wants to go home with you, simply tell her you don't pay for girls. If she's a prostitute or is hanging out in that type of area, she won't likely be offended. I found a lot of prostitutes would tell me not to worry about it and come home with me anyways.
If you meet a girl at a normal club it shouldn't be an issue, and if it is, she'll probably bring it up herself to make it clear.
Quote: (10-06-2012 01:50 AM)murrb Wrote:
I also feel like one of them im talking to is trolling me hard.
She keeps calling me uncle on skype and saying I look old when I clearly dont.
I have talked to about 6 or 7 on skype and none of them have thought that so I think she is jus trying to pllay hard to get unlike all of her counterparts that seem to give in easier.
She also wont show me her face on skype which scares me.
I can't tell if she has decided to play hard to get because she has been hurt soo many times or she is just a lady boy or something.
ladyboy
A good way to find out for sure is ask her to add you on Facebook. There will typically be more photos there than the dating site so it'll be easier to tell.
Another giveaway - if a Thai girl on hi5, Facebook, or some other social site has only one or two photos, she's probably hiding that she's a ladyboy. Thai women are fascinated with photos of themselves and usually have hundreds of them on their social accounts, especially if they're any good-looking.
Quote: (10-06-2012 01:53 AM)RioNomad Wrote:
Quote: (10-06-2012 01:46 AM)murrb Wrote:
I was reading on lonely planet forums and a few people were saying that all the thai women will charge you no matter what.
How can you make it clear ahead of time that you aren't here to pay for sex without being a total asshole?
By not going home with a hooker. It might come as a shocker, but the large, LARGE majority of Thai girls are not prostitutes.
Where are you meeting these girls? That will be a big factor in if they are pros or not. ThaiFriendly wont have many pros. RCA and Thonglor areas of Bangkok also wont have pros.
Is that true that ThaiFriendly has less pros? I've never checked it out. Then again, I probably have the worst internet dating skills in the world. lol For some reason I just really suck at pulling ass online. The one single time I got an internet date I showed up and the chick was cute from the waist up and all blown up down below. lol It was kind of an embarassing date.
You wouldn't expect that kind of thing in Thailand; I think her studies abroad contaminated. lol
Quote: (10-07-2012 10:54 AM)IainMuirs Wrote:
Who brings friends on dates anyway?
Thai people do. This is really common for women there on a first date - any basic book on the culture will tell you that. And you're definitely expected to pay for both. You might get away with on the account of being a foreigner and out of the loop but it won't look good. Just show them a good time, win their friend over, and you're well on your way.
Quote:Quote:
For example, if she barely speak English and is willing to leave with you after meeting in a club and knowing you for 5 minutes then alarm bells should go off because not matter what you think of your game that's not what won her over.
I'm tempted to agree on this, but I've fucked a lot of prostitutes for free based on game alone. I've also banged plenty of girls that didn't speak English, even before I knew Thai, with no expectation of pay. Of course, there's always the issue of a condumn accidently breaking, but that's a personal choice.
I think as long as you keep the issue in mind when you're in those types of venues and get it out on the table when necessary, you'll be fine.
Quote: (10-07-2012 02:08 PM)murrb Wrote:
It also seems that about every other thai girl I talk to has just gotten her heart broken by a farang and is on the rebound. haha
We know where you're meeting your girls then, don't we?
No hate - just saying.
Quote: (10-07-2012 08:01 PM)IainMuirs Wrote:
A lot of the Thai girls I fucked said to me the next day they can't actually believe that the night before happened as they've never met a guy and had sex with him the same night and I can quite believe it. Seems that when Thais like each other they date for weeks / months before sex happens and any foreigners they've known have probably been too pussy to take the lead which you have to do with Thai girls. Lead and they will follow.
Wouldn't be too quick to believe them. Even the mainstream girls are incredible liars.
Also, I know a lot of Thai guys that are real players. These boys know what they're doing and keep it all on the low for the most part. Many have multiple girlfriends they are banging.
Also, watch out when a guy tells you some chick is his sister. Chances are he's banging her already and gets a kick out of watching you try to land her all night at which point he walks out the door with her. I don't know why they would call a gik their sister - kind of strange - but they do it a lot.
Quote: (10-07-2012 09:27 PM)scotian Wrote:
Just how prevalent are ladyboys in Thailand? Are they mainly found where all the whores hang out, or do they also hang out in regular clubs?
That's one of the main things that freaks me out about my upcoming trip to SE Asia, if I ever accidentally hooked up with one, I don't know what would happen but I imagine it would be something like what Begby did in Trainspotting when it happened to him.
Never saw that movie, but I'd get it out of your head that you're going to do anything violent if a ladyboy gets her paws on you. Many have been brawling on the streets and at school their entire lives - and brawling in Thailand is a completely different animal than in the Western world.
Others are deep in the drug game. Many carry guns or knives.
I've accidently made out with two in 5 years of living in Southeast Asia. One was so well-disguised that none of my Thai buddies even knew until her friend warned one.
I didn't sweat it - shit happens. Not going to beat myself up about a mistake. And it makes for a great topic of conversation in the states.
Quote: (10-07-2012 09:48 PM)scotian Wrote:
I joined the site Dating in Asia a couple of hours ago and have been checking out some profiles and low and behold the majority of the ones I clicked on have been ladyboys! I don't know what I'm going to do when I get over there, make every girl I meet show me her beaver before I escalate?
I'll probably start out slow and give myself a few days to get used to being in Thailand and of course, develop a sense for spotting a tranny. Man, the thought of even touching a chick with a dick makes me sick.
haha Don't worry too much, Man. It's pretty easy to tell for the most part in person. If you're in a bar with a lot of ladyboys and prostitutes and she's tall, just ask her if she's a ladyboy. Any woman frequenting those areas knows the risks you're up against and probably get the question a lot. Her friends probably also tease her about her height and call her a ladyboy all the time.
Quote: (10-07-2012 11:32 PM)RichieP Wrote:
Despite being here a while I've been tricked couple of times and not realised until I was about to pull them home, and even one I only realised when we were in bed (before doing anything thankfully). 99% of them are obvious but... some are very subtle. So you need some defenses -
Ultimate ladyboy test:
Extend their arm out at the elbow as far as it will go. Guys arms look straight or very nearly straight when you do this. Girls arms nearly always hyperextend noticably - i.e, they dont looke straight - the lower arm angles away from the upper arm, pointing away from the body. It's down to joint formation when you're young, ladyboys cant change this... yet.
Another good test is make her show you her hand. If she "hides" her thumb e.g. tries to keep it towards the palm or slightly below her index finger, or wont let you look at her hand for a minute, that's a big red flag (she's self-conscious about man-hands and trying to make them look feminine)
Of course you can always just ask to see her ID card too. But, they can get fake ones easily enough.
Iain yeah the ladyboy joke gets tiresome after the 35th time lol
Dropping the ladyboy wisdom - atta guy.
I also read somewhere that men have shorter upper arms than women do.
Quote: (10-11-2012 08:16 PM)20Nation Wrote:
Quote: (10-07-2012 10:33 PM)IainMuirs Wrote:
One annoying thing is some Thai girls seem to find it funny to joke when you're about to bang that they are a ladyboy. I had one of my bed, stripped naked and dripping wet (so obviously not a ladyboy) and then she starts joking about being a katoey. Even though I knew she wasn't it was a massive boner killer. Don't know why they do it.
LOL they do this in Philippines all the time too. So fucking annoying, cause I am always worried about it.
Just tell them you like ladyboys when they joke around like that. lol
Quote: (10-14-2012 10:07 PM)murrb Wrote:
Quote: (10-14-2012 09:40 PM)Technics Wrote:
murrb,
I actually laughed out loud at your response to this Thai chick. Way to determine she's expendable then go out with a bang.
The best part was when she got visibly irritated she started telling me that it was small and started making small gestures with her fingers then started slapping her forearms saying she needed something big.
Damn, sounds like a keeper.
Quote: (10-16-2012 05:48 PM)murrb Wrote:
Alot of them keep calling me a butterfly and ask me how many other girls I talk to. I say No No NO but they dont believe me.
If I cant even game thai girls I dont know what im doing haha
You might be coming on too strong. The trick with a lot of these girls is to keep everything casual and mellow, as if you're just friends, and then when you're alone and its time she'll just sort of throw herself all over you. Alcohol obviously a plus for this.
Quote: (10-16-2012 07:40 PM)Soma Wrote:
Quote: (10-16-2012 05:48 PM)murrb Wrote:
Alot of them keep calling me a butterfly and ask me how many other girls I talk to. I say No No NO but they dont believe me.
If I cant even game thai girls I dont know what im doing haha
Every Thai girl will ask you that - it's a standard shit test. Don't deny, agree and amplify.
Well played.
Quote: (10-18-2012 05:15 PM)192 Wrote:
Quote: (10-16-2012 05:48 PM)murrb Wrote:
Alot of them keep calling me a butterfly and ask me how many other girls I talk to. I say No No NO but they dont believe me.
If I cant even game thai girls I dont know what im doing haha
Butterfly is fairly low key, you will be escalated as below:
1. Butterfly man
2. Helicoptor man
3. Airplane man
4. Airport
If you want to get a group of Thais laughing their fucking ass off, explain to them what a landing strip is in the states.
Quote: (10-18-2012 07:48 PM)Kdog Wrote:
Quote: (10-18-2012 03:59 PM)murrb Wrote:
I was talking to a girl the other night and she gave me her skype name. We started talking on there and then she told me she was actually 16. I was like "wtf" someone froom rooshv forums is fucking with me now. I am sure it is some dude trying to bait other guys or something like that.
I've had that happen to me also. The profile will say 18 obv and then after a while talking..."Can I tell you something?" (Me hoping its not some ladyboy confession
.) Followed by ''I am actually 16,17." etc. Weirdest thing was the two girls that this happened with were the 2 that I've talked to that didn't even have accents and texted/spoke with western English slang. Interpol child predator unit on TF?
sorry guys that was me.... On a serious note, yes, there are people prowling those sites to bait pedos. Sometimes authorities and other times it's people who want a reason to blackmail you.