Quote: (06-08-2015 10:56 AM)Moto Wrote:
No I would not.
If I wanted an open relationship, I would have one. Then, it would not be cheating.
By choice I don't, and so wouldn't.
This is an admirable mindset and I followed it until my first proper LTR.
I noticed, I would 'cheat' in one way or another, for her own sake, not really mine. (She wants to be with a guy who projects a good vibe, this helps me project my best vibe)
By doing this, I got my mojo back but more importantly, I stopped caring about the 'what ifs'.
- what if she is messaging another guy
- what if she is not happy
- what if she goes out with her slutty friends and meets a guy and they conspire to keep it a secret
Essentially, all the insecure things which you can control but women will try and get you to feel because they want to feel wanted. Then you realize every woman is a cliche and you need to do this, to keep shit in line and to fix your frame if she is giving you shit (damage control/preventative measures).
It comes to this point after a while.
It's important to be able to do this, for the health of your relationship and to be able to appreciate your relationship but even more so, your own sense of self-worth.
You can be with a woman who is amazing at pleasing you and mindblowing but every woman is a cliche and this point will be reached.
I just can't help myself as hypocritical as it used to sound.
Of course, these are things you keep on the down-low to have a 'monogamous' relationship.
It has to be 'exclusive' to you two but 'open' to yourself otherwise you set a shitty precedent.
Emotional or physical cheating, it's all still 'cheating' so pick your own definition.
Integrity is a concept applied to male bonds, camaraderie etc. but in a relationship, it cannot be fully applicable for a relationship to be truly happy.
It's peaks and valleys and you gotta be able to manage that, one way or another. Some guys prefer to do it this way, others' apply more 'feminine' ways of getting validation.