[peacepeace65]

In my early 20s, just moved into a studio in nyc, and even though I've been able to go out and do some approaches with wings, I'm ashamed to say that I have a hard time getting up the courage to go out alone. For the record, I'm in kips bay / murray hill, and a lot of the bars over here are kind of loud / douchey so it's not really a great vibe for me to start out with as a newbie. Are there any good low-key, quiet bars in the city that I could go to a few nights a week or on the weekend and get a couple of approaches under my belt by myself? Just looking for some places that would be good for a beginner like myself.

[Comte De St. Germain]

That's the opposite of what you should do. Starting at the most cutthroat places is the best way to start off period as if you fuck up in those places it's okay but fucking up at a chill venue has the very real ability of ruining that venue.

And I hope you don't foolishly believe that you're different from all the other newbies. Looking back I started horribly too. Pass it forward and don't try to ruin good venues like all the PUAfags do.

[Vaun]

(06-07-2017 09:41 PM)peacepeace65 Wrote:  

In my early 20s, just moved into a studio in nyc, and even though I've been able to go out and do some approaches with wings, I'm ashamed to say that I have a hard time getting up the courage to go out alone. For the record, I'm in kips bay / murray hill, and a lot of the bars over here are kind of loud / douchey so it's not really a great vibe for me to start out with as a newbie. Are there any good low-key, quiet bars in the city that I could go to a few nights a week or on the weekend and get a couple of approaches under my belt by myself? Just looking for some places that would be good for a beginner like myself.

ahh my old neighborhood. Murray Hill is good if you go in knowing exactly what it is, and dont over think it. The neighborhood is full of young single women, recent college grads to 35.

Start with the Banc Cafe(for happy hour) and Middle Branch(mostly Tinder dates, but a good place to get your feet wet). Teds Corner Tavern looks pretty chill too, been in there a few times with an ex, she lives right above it. Just started texting her again so back off haha.

[germanico]

So? go out with wings then until you get fed up with them and start going out alone.

As St Germain implies, being a newbie sucks. And no matter what you do it will continue to suck until it no longer does. Just go out and get as many approaches as you can until you realize its all the same. Approaching is not gaming, its just the introduction. It wont matter if you are with a wingman or alone or in the streetor in a bar or at night or during the day.

[Hypno]

Two ideas - practice being social 24/7. Say hello to the doorman or security guard. Talk to him long enough to learn something new about him. Find out what color his eyes are. Do the same thing with a couple of people at work - could be an old lady, someone at the sandwich counter, etc. Just practice talking to people.

Second idea - just go out. Maybe for food, coffee, trivia, doesn't matter. Don't tell yourself its to open, just go out. Do small things like this to reduce the pressure. You don't have to be at some cool bar to open someone - its more effective at the dry cleaner, subway platform, in line at the deli, etc.

[cascadecombo]

Where abouts should OP head to?

I'm heading there next week and would like to know which spots are ideal.

[Darkwing Buck]

Bruh if you wanna go out alone just go out alone. Why do you need a specific bar to go to or "practice" on? This is pussy shit.

I used to go out alone every weekend. I can easily go alone to any venue or event and have a great time. It comes partly with trusting and loving yourself and having self-worth and partly with developing the confidence and experience through practice.

It's not even a thought in my head that I'm "alone" somewhere. Who gives a fuck? You're a fucking MAN. Do you need someone to chaperone you at all times?