[Topsdown]

I want some sort of accountability here, hence the thread. I am going to day game and use situational openers along with using Roosh's program.

I've started a work out program and am eating better even though I have a ways to go. The reading portion isn't a problem (I do it now, maybe too many books) but I am going to seek out classics and high quality non fiction literature. In addition, I am going to be more mindful and focused on the present.

First approach:

I went into a bookstore, hunted for books before switching to women. I found one sitting in the coffee shop area. She was a six in my view. I sat down one table away, read and drank coffee for about two or three minutes and made a comment about the sun. I proceeded to ask her about the book she was reading as l lowered the blind on my window. We went back and forth about it for 30 seconds to a minute. She mentioned studying psychology in school. For some reason, this freaked me (in hindsight, I thought she made a backhanded comment about my gaming her but I could be wrong) and I ejected by saying I was going to see if I could a copy of the book she was reading.

Lessons learned: It takes a lot to fill the void. Need to work on approach anxiety and conversation skills.

[Investment Bro]

What's your plan in order to boost your conversational skills besides approaches and reading?

[Topsdown]

I should qualify the above with the following...Communication skills poor to fair with strangers but I can have extended conservations full of both laughter and seriousness with people I know. I am using work to expand my social circle along with finding some sort of activity club. Work is great in the sense there aren't a lot of females so I can shoot the shit with the guys and speak of manly things. In addition, every service worker and other safe targets are my unwitting practice partners. I am also listening to various comedians to learn how to be wittier and stay relavant topically speaking. Again, I can be funny with familiar faces but it's awkward with new lizards.

Finally, I am open to suggestions as well.

[Topsdown]

To switch things up, I joined several Meetup groups. One such group is hosting a small card tournament at one of the bars in the local major city hipster/party scene tomorrow. In addition, there is another social group going to same bar, not to mention all of the local non Meetup people who would be there as well...

[Topsdown]

I went to the library today and i tried approaching an older 5 just for the hell of it. However whenever I approached she went to a different part of the building I was in before i could even start talking. I walked up to her a few times and each time it was the same thing. Obviously she didn't want me to bother her. It was kinda hiralious.

On the bright side, I picked up the nomad cocktail book, a nonfiction account of Rasputin, The Road, and some other book. I also pushed conservation onto various service workers. Looking forward to the bar outing tomorrow.

[Turnus]

Kind of sounds like you were chasing her around the library. She obviously noticed this and was running from you lol. Gotta make that move within 15 seconds of spotting her or else your going to chicken out (or scare the cat!)

[Topsdown]

I wasn't scared...Think it was cat fear. I wouldn't say chasing but I know what you are saying.

[Topsdown]

I went out to the bar I mentioned previously. I had partial success in the sense I pushed myself to conversate and joke around with other people. They were receptive but it was interesting to say the least. I met the Meetup group and there were actually two different activities going. One was the card tournament and the other was adult coloring. (I joined the card tournament...WTF adult coloring).

There was much laughter in the tournament part of the bar but low whispers at most from the coloring crowd. The card players were 30s and up while the colorers were 20s to 30s.

Anyway, I joked and talked to both men and women but I failed to really escalate anything. Logistics were not good since I travelled 45 mins there and there was just enough structure, time of week, etc to water down night game to day game. In addition, social circle seemed to be in play as well. Those are secondary compared to needing to develop game further.

In a nutshell, yes to pushing basic social skills, no to gamesmanship.

[Topsdown]

I'm keeping this quick today but I forgot to mention this previously. I bought a small weight set and starting using it for a few days. However, I had been doing freehand exercises for about a month now with progress being made already.

[WoeMachine]

(04-05-2017 06:35 PM)Turnus Wrote:  

Kind of sounds like you were chasing her around the library. She obviously noticed this and was running from you lol. Gotta make that move within 15 seconds of spotting her or else your going to chicken out (or scare the cat!)

So true.

It's like jumping off of somewhere high. I've had perfect openers (I know the opener isn't important but...) hesitated and never approached because I over-thought things.

I need to just jump right away, working on this aspect will be challenging.

[Topsdown]

I was at a fast food joint (moment of weakness), spotted a six getting a drink. I was eating inside, decided to get one refill and she was looking at her phone while she was getting a drink as well.

I simply said One of those days? She said yeah and then starts telling me about her drama, kids, etc. I give her about two minutes and then politely eject. It was good to open but there was too much going on her end that I didn't​ want to get into. I'm surprised at what people will share...Perhaps some of this is from being an introvert but still...

[Topsdown]

Supplemental here but I downloaded the tinder app pretty recently. I lost a tinder 5 due to teasing too soon. Currently talking to a tinder 7.5 age 28 but just started so anything still goes.

Me:. Are those all of your divas in the last pic? ( Pic is of her, 3 other woman and two dudes...Looks like she works in a hair salon)

Her:. Hello...Omg your profile says you live really far away. I'm in (town redacted).

Me. I'm one town over...I know (town) really well. Trust me we're closer than what the app says. Cars shrink distances.

Incan probably get to her in 20 min if this works since it's pretty much all highway and her place is a 3rd tier city at best.

I'm still going to approach in the real world primarily but I'll use what tools there if nothing else so I don't feel like a clueless idiot.

[Topsdown]

Super quick here but wanted to show commitment to going out...Hitting my haunts on Weds and going to the same bar Thursday. I need to learn how this group started and ultimately start a group like this in my town so I don't have to go 45 minutes out. I will still go there it's the closest mid tier city there is to me.

[Topsdown]

I went out on Wednesday but nobody was buying what I was selling. I didn't go out today, had a family thing come up last minute. I am going to try new haunts and to keep approaching.

Continuing with weights...I am already noticing increases in functional strength and perhaps a slight decrease in size.

I am done with the books I picked up. I am going to see about obtaining stoic materials. In addition, I am slowing trying to make logistics a bit better.

[Topsdown]

I have worked the last few days so I resorted to using Tinder (as stated above) along with OkCupid. Obviously not the same as IRL approaches but I wanted to keep my mindset on it. I am the point where I can lure women in to look at my profile but they don't respond or send me messages in one form or another saying they are better than me. Best case scenario, I'm okay with initial messages but my profile and pictures need work. I assume the same with Tinder but doing even worse there.

I slightly improved logistics by using penny pitching skills to start an alcohol collection. (Feels great to know it was nominally free). It's not bottom shelf stuff, more like low to mid tier. I don't really drink but I took sips to get an idea of what it tastes like and to hopefully make it look more natural to have the stuff there. I figure they might be too wasted to care. Again a quick and cheap way to say I made some kind of progress.

Exercise has continued to yield improvements that I am noticing. I figure I'll hit a plateau at some point but it's a problem for another day.

I am going to do the life maintenance stuff tonight and free myself for approaches over the next few days. It's been a battle of learning to look at the positive things in life. Signing off for now...

[Topsdown]

Delete

[Topsdown]

I went out, approached a couple of times, couldn't even get sentence out, they left without saying a word. Not sure this time, no hesitation between spotting them or making obvious changes in direction. I bathed and everything lol...Prepared to put 3+ years of work, starting from bottom.

[Topsdown]

I went out yesterday to the same bar...Approached, talked to a few ladies, it was in a group setting so limited peneration...I wasn't sure there was true personal interest or just polite inclusion. Also bantered with a lady in the grocery store but I couldn't get her to ask a personal question as mentioned in Roosh's Day Bang.

I also made a few changes to my online dating profile and first messaging. I guess the first messaging is working in the sense I can get them to look at my profile but then no response. Improvement in the sense they are looking verses not looking. I assume pictures are the weak point followed by profile.

Continuing exercise program but I have slipped in not following through with whole routine. I will get back on it.

[Topsdown]

thread-53441.html

Now I wonder if I am putting out the wrong vibe, like I am not serious enough in the right way or perhaps this is simultaneously novice/advanced training.

[Topsdown]

I noticed myself talking to strangers at least for a little bit and I rarely did that before joining here. I am a weird point, exercise wise, where I am ready to add more weight on certain exercises but need to keep working on other areas before adding weight. I started really being serious with 401k only a few years ago. Now I have started adding to lendingclub.com, using it as my bond portion of investing (thanks to here) Still no true close though in terms of approach...Of course I will keep trying.

[gework]

(04-21-2017 03:19 PM)Topsdown Wrote:  

I can get them to look at my profile but then no response.

Try something like:

Quote:

Hi [Chloe],

It's funny, there is something about your profile that really caught my eye and seemed strangely familiar, like déjà vu.

I mean, you're into [kite surfing], [love to travel], [Trump] and seems like [you have a free spirit]. Between that and your photos, it made me wonder: have we met before?

This will work better for less serious girls.

[Topsdown]

Gework, I do send a somewhat similar message but the spirit is different enough so I will try your version for a bit. I feel like I need someone to tear my profile apart but let's start with the message.

[gework]

(04-30-2017 06:24 AM)Topsdown Wrote:  

Gework, I do send a somewhat similar message but the spirit is different enough so I will try your version for a bit. I feel like I need someone to tear my profile apart but let's start with the message.

I've done a bit of testing to see what works on POF. I posted it here somewhere:

Quote:

1) the more attractive you are the more messages you'll get
2) the more fun your profile is the more messages you'll get
3) if you're ugly-average looking you'll get very few messages if any, regardless of anything else
4) if you are very attractive you'll get multiple messages following up why you didn't reply, like "Did you get my message? I'm probably not your type."
5) looking younger than your age will get you less messages
6) attractive women don't tend to message much if at all
7) almost all message are "hey [there]" or similar, regardless of how attractive you are, you are probably part of a message bomb
8) a practically blank profile will get you as many messages as a boring one

If you are attractive and have a boring profile, changing it to fun will get an extra lot of messages. Things like: I like nights out, travelling, new experiences etc.

That's for getting messages only. I didn't tinker with sending messages much, but that one worked the best. It also seemed sending quite long messages worked.

[Topsdown]

Update:. PMs to a couple of people on here. Lost 10 lbs so far. Still have a ways to go concerning sustained conversation with strangers. I mean it is longer than before I started but not enough to do a realistic close. My style has been indirect if it matters.

[Veul]

Keep on the work. It has been of great help for someone who is starting !