[britabroad]

stopped reading at she is 32 tbh, no brainer

[The_Don_Führer]

@Britabroad - Lmao yea when I saw that I skipped straight to the replies xD

[The_Don_Führer]

P.S. I have a feeling this is a roll bread

[Off The Reservation]

(09-21-2016 09:18 PM)The_Don_Führer Wrote:  

@Laner... that's even worse, brah.

If you want to focus on sluts, you do that. But please do not leave comments suggesting that it's OK for the rest of us to do as well.

Why not, brah?

And either I am confused or you are. I think you just "told" Laner not to leave comments.

[The_Don_Führer]

@OTR - Go smash your sluts then, brah. Guess I understand your reasons for entering this thread (evil laugh)

[Travesty]

delete

[articulatecool]

I love how "studied psychology" is under "bad". All the sluts studied that.

[Leonard D Neubache]

Here's a personal opinion the likes of which I have not seen voiced elsewhere in this forum.

The longer a relationship lasts, the deeper the hole it will rip out of your soul when it's uprooted. This is not Disneyland shit. It's a fact. Humans and indeed many of the higher mammals are adapted to forge strong bonds and those bonds are protected by the biologically induced sense of loss we feel when we lose that member of our "tribe". There is at first the massive sense of loss that lasts for a varying time, but generally a few weeks (or months at worst).

But what most people don't consider or even acknowledge is the lesser degree of loss we continue to suffer over the rest of our lives. Anyone who's lost several close family members will probably attest to this. It changes you as a person, and while it may make you harder it does not make you happier.

It seems like most guys on this forum take an approach to life which says "I rationalise this, therefore I will feel it as such." Umm, not really. Sure, we're men. We like to think that emotions are something we can banish with logic but we're still made of flesh and bone. It doesn't work that way.

So this ties in with your dilemma thusly.

It doesn't matter what pretence you enter into this relationship with. Your very biology is going to fuck you when she's ripped out of your life, regardless of whether it's on your terms or not. We see this all the time when some guy dumps an LTR he's completely fed up with. In theory he should be over the moon, but we all know that it leaves a scar that you have little to no means to truly heal.

Having said all that, this bitch is seriously bad news. You understand why now? A smoking hot woman that is completely fucking unreliable is the most dangerous force a man can get entangled with because your biology is not interested in all your fucking excuses when it ends.

Your genetic coding is going to think it's hit the jackpot! OMFG! ARE YOU SEEING THESE GENES? THOSE GENES AND OUR GENES ARE GOING TO CREATE A MASTER FUCKING RACE AND PURGE ALL LESSER BREEDS FROM OUR LANDS! WE FUCKING DID IT! ALL WE HAVE TO DO NOW IS KILL ALL POTENTIAL RIVAL MATES AND WE ARE FUCKING GOLDEN!

You think that voice is going to just "switch off" because you say to yourself "well, we both knew this wasn't going to last". NOPE! That voice is going to say:

BRAH, YOU FUCKED UP BRO! YOU WERE GOING TO CREATE THE MASTER RACE. YOU HAD IT ALL AND YOU FUCKED IT UP, BRAH! YOU FUCKING BLEW IT!.

And in the back of your mind your loins will be feeding you that for a loooooooooooong fucking time. She will always be "the one" no matter what a bitch she was and how much your conscious mind hated her in the end.

This is not even going into birth control sabotage and what happens when a 30 something empowered woman yanks your children out from under you in a society where you have no fucking control over the outcome. That's basically what you're seeing above but on steroids.

So there you have it. You don't get to "just fuck around for a bit" with women like this. Here genes have gotten their claws into your genes and vice versa. Only the depth of penetration and subsequent trauma of removal remain to be seen, and that my good man is simply matter of how long you choose to keep playing this unwinnable game.

[Travesty]

^ Man this guy is on some Deep Space Primal Level thinking type shit.

Do you do any drugs or other recreational things? That is not a jokey question. It's like an angsty AnonymousBosch post. Very elegant.

[The_Don_Führer]

@Leonard - Damn, son, I agree wholeheartedly with everything you've said...

[General Stalin]

Killer post by LDN. If you are effectively "with" a girl for some extended period of time deeper than just casually banging once a week, then there is going to be a sense of loss when it ends no matter how well you mentally prepare for it.

I would even argue it is somewhat unhealthy and some sort of soft sociopathy if you have sex with someone regularly for a decent length of time and never grow any sort of attachment whatsoever.

[blck]

@LDN You touch many points here we all can relate to from personal expériences and I'm not happy to say that after 6 years my mind and body keep telling me that I fucked up in ways I wouldn't have think...

[Leonard D Neubache]

Cheers guys. We often make light fun of women and their hilarious biological drivers that cause them to engage in all kinds of ridiculous behaviour.

Well we're 99% the same meatsack. We just have male biological drivers rather than female ones. Pretending they don't exist because "men aren't like that" leads to trouble down the line. The good news for us is that we're far from being frustrated incels chained down by feminism and anti-masculinity brainwashing, but we would do well to remember that evolution has not yet separated us from the apes as much as we'd like to believe.

p.s. @Travesty: No drugs. But I live out in the sticks fairly close to nature. Quiet observation and introspection is a lot easier here.

[hunger]

Leo is probably right. But I'm already in too deep, so the best I can do is relax and go through it. Leaving now feels wrong and hurtful, like I'm missing out on some learnings.

In my experience, every relationship has a moment where you're like "Ok, that's it." If you stay beyond that point, there's no more learnings to be gained and no more fun to be had.

I have some issues and am far from perfect, but I also have good instincts that keep me on track.....they're telling me to stick around a bit longer.

[The_Don_Führer]

Bro, ARE YOU EXCLUSIVE WITH HER??

[hunger]

(09-22-2016 06:24 AM)The_Don_Führer Wrote:  

Bro, ARE YOU EXCLUSIVE WITH HER??

I thought of it for a moment but I can feel it weakening me....gonna go on some dates next week

[Phoenix]

(09-21-2016 09:18 PM)The_Don_Führer Wrote:  

@Laner... that's even worse, brah.

If you want to focus on sluts, you do that. But please do not leave comments suggesting that it's OK for the rest of us to do as well.

Forecast for the week: cloudy with a chance of banhammer.

[The_Don_Führer]

So that's a no? For the love of Macho Man Randy Savage I hope you aren't exclusive with her.

There's no harm in banging her so long as you're banging younger, more wholesome women. No harm at all

However... if this is your one and only, I wonder how you even got on this forum.

[Phoenix]

(09-21-2016 09:24 PM)britabroad Wrote:  

stopped reading at she is 32 tbh, no brainer

But again, it's very easy to sit on a couch and type this into a laptop. Everybody does this. But I'd like to see the percentage of those who do so who've married hot virgin doting wives with whom they have great sexual chemistry.

If all the cars on the market are rusty old used cars, and nice new cars are only available to the top 1% rich men, saying "nah just get a new car" is nothing more than arrogance and false bravado.

[hunger]

(09-22-2016 06:41 AM)Phoenix Wrote:  

(09-21-2016 09:24 PM)britabroad Wrote:  

stopped reading at she is 32 tbh, no brainer

But again, it's very easy to sit on a couch and type this into a laptop. Everybody does this. But I'd like to see the percentage of those who do so who've married hot virgin doting wives with whom they have great sexual chemistry.

If all the cars on the market are rusty old used cars, and nice new cars are only available to the top 1% rich men, saying "nah just get a new car" is nothing more than arrogance and false bravado.

Yeah you can definitely tell who on this forum has actual game experience and who is just regurgitating TRP theory

[The_Don_Führer]

ITT: The bitterness of the mythical bird has rendered her eggs stillborn

[Dalaran1991]

Interesting read from Leonard, but here's the thing: just because there will be a loss, doesn't mean that you will have to bear it for long.

Biology or not, look at how women handle a break up: they monkey branch to another guy right away. The hotter the girl, the shorter the transition time. How you explain it (defense mechanism, biology survival instinct, war bride genes, etc.) doesn't matter, what matter is whatever pain you feel will lessen or disappear when you meet another girl.

Learn from women in this perspective. The cure for oneitis and heartbroken is always abundance mentality. No need to complicate your life.

OP seems to be in a position to run game, with a bit of effort and discipline he should have no problem getting over this. Just need a good wingman to drag you out of the house and meet the ladies. In a few months when you look at this girl's pictures with your new chick (who will prolly be younger hotter tighter) she will ask "who's this ugly girl?"

Speaking of which, shove that thought "I'm looking for a wife" out of your head. It prepares the velvet bed for oneitis that a hardcore slut will jump on.

And WIA got it right. You got what it takes to get the girl, do you have what it takes to keep her? Dont be the king who conquer a country and realize ruling it is way outta his league.

[blck]

(09-22-2016 07:29 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  

Interesting read from Leonard, but here's the thing: just because there will be a loss, doesn't mean that you will have to bear it for long.

Biology or not, look at how women handle a break up: they monkey branch to another guy right away. The hotter the girl, the shorter the transition time. How you explain it (defense mechanism, biology survival instinct, war bride genes, etc.) doesn't matter, what matter is whatever pain you feel will lessen or disappear when you meet another girl.

Learn from women in this perspective. The cure for oneitis and heartbroken is always abundance mentality. No need to complicate your life.

That's the thing, what LND talked about was not how to handle the break up but more How to let go someone you attached yourself to due to long time effect on both of you (maybe we're touching the basis of the Fuck the ex doesn't count theory)
You've build a bond way stronger than love, more a mix of habits and chemistry you've created due to countless unprotected love sessions.

That can explain why some girls will keep fucking some ex for years despite hating him on a day to day basis : This dude behavior and fluids became parts of her own biology.

[Dalaran1991]

(09-22-2016 08:25 AM)blck Wrote:  

That's the thing, what LND talked about was not how to handle the break up but more How to let go someone you attached yourself to due to long time effect on both of you (maybe we're touching the basis of the Fuck the ex doesn't count theory)
You've build a bond way stronger than love, more a mix of habits and chemistry you've created due to countless unprotected love sessions.

I get what LND was saying and I agree with it. I'm also saying that whatever bond you created, it wasn't special and easily replaceable, and that many girls will have that effect on you throughtout your life.

Hell I'm still in my 20s and I still fantasize about every ex I had, despite the fact that the one that came after was always an upgrade to the previous. There was a bond every time, and none of those bonds were special nor were they mutually exclusive. It was just a memory that you will lump in the same "good old times" category as that time when you try stealing a cop's gun from his belt with your buddies while you were high (true story)

Biology and pain are all fine and good, but they are just annoying part of life that you deal with every day like going to the restroom. Its not some special hard truth that you have to face or run away from. Proof: OP title: Fell in love with a slut...again. Pretty damn sure he felt this every time before. Bad habit. Also means that the bonds with the sluts that came before and before, weren't apparently so special.


"Way stronger than love" Can't help it, no sarcasm intended



TLDR: OP should dump his girl because she ain't so special and he will be fine. In the long run she was just a notch or a lesson, nothing more.

I wished I had listened to the same advice my mentor gave me when I had my onenits at 19.

[Kaligula]

(09-21-2016 04:29 PM)hunger Wrote:  

Thanks for all the great responses, especially from Travesty and Chemistry.

You're all totally right, and I was doing really well with keeping these hoes out of my life and focusing, deliberately and intellectually, on finding a suitable mate for marriage. However, I met this one in a context where we saw each other every day for a number of weeks, so it was harder to resist.

Something else I've noticed, is that every women I've ever had a strong emotional reaction to, has looked like my mother in her prime. So I suspect that on some level, I'm looking for someone that looks like her and gives me the emotional validation that i never got from her.

I'm definitely looking for a wife. I've had so many girls, the chase just isn't fun to me anymore. I know men can have kids later in life, but I don't wanna be 54 with a 9 year old around. I wanna start a family within the next 5-7 years.

I've been looking at "good girls" at work lately, and thinking about what needs to change in my game to get that type of girl. Perhaps the need for validation?

Did your women look or behave like your mother...? Do you think that your mother was some kind of beauty...? If so, isn't a picture or a portrait enough?
I have a cold mother too, so I can sympathize with you.
It leaves you in life with subconscious fishing for acceptance (I would say that your nick - hunger - is quite meaningful), and simply feeling very bad when leaving or pushing people away (=taking acceptance away). That, unfortunately, gives others advantage over you, since it is like a feeling that a ball is always on the other side in game and you have to wait for it. Practically, you can only play by going on counteroffensive, which means waiting for the other side to make a first move.


It can drive even powerful people crazy ------- Nero had his mother, Agrippina, killed to finally get some sense of freedom and self-possession. I do not feel strong enough to condemn him.

If you want to leave this girl, it will be easier for you to get her to leave. I think that you subconsciously know it already, since you have presented your case as 'falling in love'. Love is an excuse for lack of action on your side; we don't destroy or attack love, right...?