[Laner]

(09-21-2016 04:17 PM)AboveAverageJoe Wrote:  

Number one: You have fallen deep for this chick.
Number two: Never plan a future with a woman, plan your future and allow her to be in it or not,
ONE YOUR TERMS.
Number three: This one will cheat on you.

Don't see why a guy with all these options and resources is checking out at the beginning of his prime.

Any player who has been in the game for a long time will have a story or two exactly like this. Its easy to relate.

Humans have a brain that is wired to fall in love. Which is why I only half agree with Travesty's prediction for the future. Its all fine to raise kids sans emotional attachment to a partner- this happens in most traditional marriages too- but having an open relationship keeps the door open for love to enter into the mix. Once that happens, all bets are off.

Many men can handle the love and affection of multiple women, but women can not. The are in love with the idea of being adored by many men, but will still pick the best one to be in love with.

I have enjoyed being in love with beautiful women immensely, but after the first time I found out I was being cheated on, the illusion of love came crashing down. I was young so I recovered- we all do, eventually- but I was much more careful the second time.

With mate selection it is trickier. I know insanely beautiful women who have disasters for parents. Their beauty scream "good genetics" but there is more to it than that. Good genetics takes getting to know their families and asking the right questions. For this to happen a woman has to have to be a baseline '7' to even get me in the door to meet the fam.

[Travesty]

(09-21-2016 04:29 PM)hunger Wrote:  

Something else I've noticed, is that every women I've ever had a strong emotional reaction to, has looked like my mother in her prime. So I suspect that on some level, I'm looking for someone that looks like her and gives me the emotional validation that i never got from her.

....

I've been looking at "good girls" at work lately, and thinking about what needs to change in my game to get that type of girl. Perhaps the need for validation?[/size]

Ok if your problem with your mom is that big you need to see a therapist and get it worked out. That is a much bigger than the issue I have with my mom which honestly therapy wouldn't hurt me either to make sure my ducks are in a line.

On the second part, what I have noticed over time is from good girls is that as an all out player you either need to catch one that is a virgin with little to no experience so she doesn't understand who she is dealing with...

Or she has had a boyfriend or two and probably has had sex and been around the block a little bit and she knows from experience what a player looks and acts like and she knows not to mess with one to get her heart broken and is smart.

Your best best is to whatever you do or let slip out in little innuendos is not let people know around you that you bang chicks all the time. You can be super confident, being too non-chalant and cocky though can warn off many of the smarter good girls. They want and need investment.

[XPQ22]

(09-21-2016 04:36 PM)Laner Wrote:  

With mate selection it is trickier. I know insanely beautiful women who have disasters for parents. Their beauty scream "good genetics" but there is more to it than that. Good genetics takes getting to know their families and asking the right questions. For this to happen a woman has to have to be a baseline '7' to even get me in the door to meet the fam.

I think it's great to meet the parents of any girl I'm seeing for any length of time. You can learn a lot about her suitability for a longer relationship.

You can't really take a girl's word for what her parents are actually like, anyway. I think a girl who claims to have had a bad childhood but is still on good terms with her parents and they don't seem overtly fucked-up in person is actually a better prospect than a girl who claims to have had a perfectly happy childhood but then moved 2000 miles from her folks and only talks to them once every two months.

It's the ones that claim to have had lives that are way too perfect to be true you gotta watch out for.

[RatInTheWoods]

You are mad if you think only 20 dudes have had a go on her, it could be hundreds.

But so can any woman these days have that notch count. You would never know, and you can't believe what she says.

You have to stop obsessing over all the dudes that have blown inside her and that she has gobbled off. NOTHING good can come from you dwelling on that.

Instead just focus on one question: Does she bring good things into your life? If she does then great, hang out with her.

[XPQ22]

(09-21-2016 05:08 PM)RatInTheWoods Wrote:  

You are mad if you think only 20 dudes have had a go on her, it could be hundreds.

A joke my dad used to tell: An astronomer is giving a lecture to an audience of students about the future of our solar system. At some point during the talk he says "So, the most probable outcome is that about a billion years from now, the sun will swell into a red giant and engulf the inner solar system, ending all life on Earth..."

After the lecture an obviously anxious student comes up to him and says "Professor, professor, how long did you say before the sun dies?"

"Well, about a billion years give or take..."

"OH thank GOD, I thought you said a million."

[Rocha]

This probably will get a lot of backlash, but if she truly banged more than 20 and less than 30, at 32yo...it is not that bad. It's one and a half guys for every sexual active year of her life. An extremely attractive woman in an age of Tinder and fast sex around the corner, being hitted on a daily basis, with possibly hundreds of unread messages in her social media profile...I would not say she is a slut in the present day and age (I hope to not get a computer virus)...unless she is lying and rationalizing many other bangs...

Nonetheless, seems like the kind of girl who you can get away with cheating on her constantly and can easily manipulate. Enjoy the ride with her and keep banging other women until you find one that suits you better. But seems you are not the kind of guy who wants or needs this kind of stuff in his life...

Also you are pushing for settling and raise a family...
And as Kaizen wrote the other day in the "Wife Hunting thread", this is like in boxing:

"Protect yourself at all times"

Just out of curiosity, how long you have been seeing each other, and has she ever adressed the settling and raise a family issue?

[General Stalin]

Nah thats a lot of dicks for a girl in my opinion. That means she has spent most of her adult life in-and-out of casual relationships at best. Compare that to a somewhat typical and more loyal and conservative young female who maybe has had a few multi-year longer term relationships realistically only racking up a single digit notch count. I would also say you'd be hard-pressed to find a girl who's banged 20+ dudes and none of them were boyfriends whom they cheated on.

[XPQ22]

(09-21-2016 05:14 PM)Rocha Wrote:  

This probably will get a lot of backlash, but if she truly banged more than 20 and less than 30, at 32yo...it is not that bad. It's one and a half guys for every sexual active year of her life. An extremely attractive woman in an age of Tinder and fast sex around the corner, being hitted on a daily basis, with possibly hundreds of unread messages in her social media profile...I would not say she is a slut in the present day and age (I hope to not get a computer virus)...unless she is lying and rationalizing many other bangs...

The future of marriage: rationalizing double-digit notch counts.

15 years from now it will be "Okay, okay. Yeah, there was that series of gangbang videos in 2019. And she was used as a Dubai porta-potty a couple times. But it was a difficult time in her life! And it was legitimately only twice. JUST TWICE"

Two things modern young women will apparently never understand: Why they can't do gangbang videos until they're 30, casually mention that they've cheated on their boyfriends before, and then marry whatever top-shelf guy they want because "the past is the past", and why guys get offended when they say they do the "I go on dates to have quick sex sometimes, but I also date to find true love." I've tried.

Just have fun Netflix and chillin' at their place once a week and don't waste your breath.

[ivansirko]

OP, just flee from utter peril and leave her. Oneitis can set you up for a bad day. The red pill isnt just what you do.. but its also of the mind and spirit. Your mind needs to be free of her and anyone like her. Your mind needs to stop thinking with your dick.

[Laner]

(09-21-2016 05:20 PM)XPQ22 Wrote:  

(09-21-2016 05:14 PM)Rocha Wrote:  

This probably will get a lot of backlash, but if she truly banged more than 20 and less than 30, at 32yo...it is not that bad. It's one and a half guys for every sexual active year of her life. An extremely attractive woman in an age of Tinder and fast sex around the corner, being hitted on a daily basis, with possibly hundreds of unread messages in her social media profile...I would not say she is a slut in the present day and age (I hope to not get a computer virus)...unless she is lying and rationalizing many other bangs...

The future of marriage: rationalizing double-digit notch counts.

15 years from now it will be "Okay, okay. Yeah, there was that series of gangbang videos in 2019. And she was used as a Dubai porta-potty a couple times. But it was a difficult time in her life! And it was legitimately only twice. JUST TWICE"

Two things modern young women will apparently never understand: Why they can't do gangbang videos until they're 30, casually mention that they've cheated on their boyfriends before, and then marry whatever top-shelf guy they want because "the past is the past", and why guys get offended when they say they do the "I go on dates to have quick sex sometimes, but I also date to find true love." I've tried.

Just have fun Netflix and chillin' at their place once a week and don't waste your breath.

Well I have seen two girls I fucked from Seeking Arrangement get married this past year. Now, I did not pay for sex, but they did tell me that "some guys do this, some do that, spend here, buy there" etc, etc. So I know that they have been whores.

Now I watch these sweet girls get married. This is the upper level game that will trick a seasoned player. These are girls that are marrying a handsome, well off, confident man in his early 30's, before she turns 27.

This is a different age fellas. A different time. Please try to be smart without getting jaded.

[WestIndianArchie]

High SMV
Good results
Incomplete game

You pull, yes.

But you can't manage the chick
Most importantly you can't manage yourself.

Always choosing self destructive women points to internal issues that can be discussed with a trained professional.

WIA

[Rocha]

(09-21-2016 05:19 PM)General Stalin Wrote:  

Nah thats a lot of dicks for a girl in my opinion. That means she has spent most of her adult life in-and-out of casual relationships at best. Compare that to a somewhat typical and more loyal and conservative young female who maybe has had a few multi-year longer term relationships realistically only racking up a single digit notch count. I would also say you'd be hard-pressed to find a girl who's banged 20+ dudes and none of them were boyfriends whom they cheated on.

Thats a lot of dicks, agreed, just I do not consider an outright slut. I am painting the picture black, but I am trying to be realistic, and what I see with many girls who only had a couple multi-year longer relationships is that sooner or later they will want to catch up on those "lost years". We are not in our grandfathers era... People change, nothing is linear in life, and a guy might also sell the soul to the devil, only to find out later...
I have seen so many guys completely destroyed...high school swethearts for 10 years, guy gets in debt with the bank to buy a condo, and on the eve of moving in...she says she has other plans...another guy was already banging her for the last 6 months, previous to the debt...

[Travesty]

Laner and Rocha are sentenced to re-education camp, they're going to start a coup.

[Laner]

(09-21-2016 06:09 PM)Travesty Wrote:  

Laner and Rocha are sentenced to re-education camp, they're going to start a coup.

95% of my bangs are from girls with those notch counts.

Bang on little sloots, bang on

[The_Don_Führer]

OP, are you in an LTR with this chick?

Either way, you need to go out and meet & bang younger, more wholesome women. And not just bang.. you need to spend time with these chicks and get to know them.

I won't tell you to leave this slut because she sounds like fun (and you need this opportunity to compare and contrast these two archetypes). But you have made the mistake of falling in love with her and that is a huge no-no with this quality of woman.

Spending time with young "good girls" is really the only thing that can set your mind straight in this situation.

Don't be all high and mighty about cheating. You get this straight, OP: She is a slut; so long as you don't let her find out, it hurts her in no way.

[The_Don_Führer]

@Laner.... How can you even be proud of that? Listen to yourself, brah.

[Laner]

(09-21-2016 06:53 PM)The_Don_Führer Wrote:  

@Laner.... How can you even be proud of that? Listen to yourself, brah.

Been in this game for 20 years.... brah.

[El Padrone]

Senor Travesty, living with a woman for a certain period of time WILL be construed effectively as a marriage by the courts in case of divorce or shit hits the fan.

Better to put a ring on it and sign a damn prenup in triplicate.

[Robert Plant]

You are in the Anglosphere. If you want a Anglosphere girl (especially of European origins) never even hope it will be for life unless she is extremely Christian or extremely unattractive. If I were in your situation, I would not leave her. That seems very self defeating because you really like her. Will your life be objectively better without her?

I would be very honest about your feelings with her, but be strategic about this. I would also strategically open the relationship up. If she is actually loyal to you, she will not slut it up. Just be sure to be discreet about any girls you sleep with on the side. If she is cool or not you will find out if you open the relationship up. You just will have to deal with the fact that occasionally she will sleep with other guys but if she is loyal/ cool this will be very occasional and minor.

Also, do not marry any western women and if you do anyway, make her sign an enforceable prenup. I don't care if you marry the virgin Mary, after 7-10 years, she will get bored and so will you. Be prepared for this.

[hunger]

Amazing discussion guys! I appreciate all the well-thought out posts. I'm so happy that I decided to join and post, some of you really get the player life in a way most people I know don't (I know maybe 4 others in my real life that are like me). I feel like I can talk to you guys like I talk to my diary.

So what I'm getting from this so far is:

• Visit my therapist (hadn't seen him in a year due to career changes)
• Tone down the overtness of my game a bit because it's scaring away wholesome good girls (I do swagger pretty hard: my mouth is always open, I automatically look at girls, and my clothing is really well put together every single day)
• Keep dating this girl until it fizzles out (or maximum of 6 months), and gain the learnings from it
  

I've been seeing her for a month now. I do have very strong feelings for her, but as you can see from my posts, I'm approaching it more like an illness to be treated, than trying to rationalize her behavior. My game may be handicapped by some mommy issues, but I'm no fool.

My goal is to date her for a maximum of 6 months. I know I know, not super player of me to treat her well and really date her. But I have a feeling that I've got something to learn from this woman, otherwise this situation wouldn't keep occurring.

So I can use this relationship to iron out some of my weaknesses keeping me from getting a good girl, I can practice being in a relationship again, and it'll also keep me from distracting myself with chasing pussy, in a period of my life where I really need to focus on my career.

If she's as smart as I think she is, she will come away from this in a better place than she started.

I try to add more than I take from every girl I date....makes it easier for me to leave in good conscience. I don't obsessively bang like I did in my early 20s, just don't have the patience for it. It's also a bit draining: you need to manage keeping her at a distance all the time, you never really get to know the person you're sleeping with, and this pussy-churn...always new people to have to focus on, say certain things to get certain reactions....just got mechanical and no-fun to me.

[Off The Reservation]

Sup Hunger, welcome.
Not in the mood to write a beatdown - other good, positive advice already written here.

[Robert Plant]

Good job Hunger, sounds like a good plan. Being in a relationship myself now I would also suggest that you find a friend who has a successful relationship to bounce ideas off of. A player will be more of a hindrance than help for advice on a relationship. Having said that, don't forget that this girl is far from perfect.

[The_Don_Führer]

@Laner... that's even worse, brah.

If you want to focus on sluts, you do that. But please do not leave comments suggesting that it's OK for the rest of us to do as well.

[The_Don_Führer]

Hunger, you've been seeing her a month?

Are you exclusive with her? And if so, will you remain as such?

[Rocha]

Hence my question, just one month with her then...humm..and she already unsolicitedly spoke in detail of her past sexual experiences, of her drug abuse, of her online dating straight to fuck other guys...guys please ignore whatever I wrote before in this thread. She is an authentic slut, and you OP should add a zero on the right to the notch count number she admits to have. I know this type, and it was not good...she was not even half hardcore...This woman is damaged, she has a men mentality, that is why you get along so well with her.

Run fast. You already know more of her than you wanted to.