[johnbozzz]

One of the more difficult things that I've encountered as I've gotten older (I'm now 24), is how many of the values I was taught by my dad have been rejected by girls and women I've attended college with and worked alongside after graduation. My dad's a baby boomer, born in 1950, and he came from a pretty traditional upbringing, which called upon him to order for women at a restaurant, lend a coat to a date, stand up when a woman left the table and hold the door.
Obviously, I've tried to carry on some of these values, namely holding the door, trying to make conversation, whatever, but most girls these days think I'm some kind of underling for trying.
One of the few things I've continued to do is order for dates at bars and restaurants, even food carts. This seems to have worked better was I was in high school. Now, girls just bitch, "What? You think I can't order myself?".
Guys, it is actually worth it to keep this up? Should I keep holding open doors for young girls (I'll always do it for the elderly, though).
What do you advise?

[storm]

The short of it is that you should adapt your game to the type of girl you're talking to.

If you can tell she is very proud to step up to the plate and (how daring!) read a restaurant menu, and even (gasp!) make a decision, let her feel good about herself. If the girl hesitates and seems uncertain but seems more of an independent type, ask her what she likes coming in and order when you arrive.

The real trick is never receiving a menu in the first place.

Just order something they will have: crab at a seafood place, california rolls at a sushi joint, the "O'Connel Burger" at "O'Connel's Burger Joint", etc. If you play your cards right she should be more interested in you than in the food and saying "just order the XYZ, it's great" will be very welcome.

[johnbozzz]

(04-15-2016 01:29 PM)storm Wrote:  

The short of it is that you should adapt your game to the type of girl you're talking to.

If you can tell she is very proud to step up to the plate and (how daring!) read a restaurant menu, and even (gasp!) make a decision, let her feel good about herself. If the girl hesitates and seems uncertain but seems more of an independent type, ask her what she likes coming in and order when you arrive.

The real trick is never receiving a menu in the first place.

Just order something they will have: crab at a seafood place, california rolls at a sushi joint, the "O'Connel Burger" at "O'Connel's Burger Joint", etc. If you play your cards right she should be more interested in you than in the food and saying "just order the XYZ, it's great" will be very welcome.

I can't really tell if this is sarcasm. By ordering for a date, I mean, she tells e what she wants, and I dictate to the waiter what she wants to order. I don't actually pick out something for her to eat. It's more of a traditional thing to do on my part. She tells me what she would like, I order it and later, I pick up the tab.

[Comte De St. Germain]

Was an entire thread necessary for this if you mean the above? You could have just asked in the player's lounge.

On ordering for your girl on a date. It's a daring thing to do and I could see it working out. Just make sure it's not heavy so she's doesn't end up in the mood where she doesn't want to fuck.

[johnbozzz]

(04-15-2016 01:47 PM)Comte De St. Germain Wrote:  

Was an entire thread necessary for this if you mean the above? You could have just asked in the player's lounge.

Yeah, I placed this topic in the wrong section and now it's been moved to Game. Sorry, I'll post simiiar questions in the PL from now on

[storm]

johnbozzz, yesterday I took a girl to a sushi bar and ordered two sets of california rolls. If you go to the place all the time and it is informal this is totally fine. Just hold frame.

[Saweeep]

If you're eating dinner, the way to do it is to ask her what she fancies before the waiter re-appears.

Then take control and order for her.

I think actually choosing anyone else's food, 99% of the time, is weird.

[johnbozzz]

(04-15-2016 02:30 PM)CrashBangWallop Wrote:  

If you're eating dinner, the way to do it is to ask her what she fancies before the waiter re-appears.

Then take control and order for her.

I think actually choosing anyone else's food, 99% of the time, is weird.

No, like I said in the above comment, I've never chosen food for a date, jsut relayed what she wanted to the waiter/waitress.

[GlobalMan]

(04-15-2016 02:32 PM)johnbozzz Wrote:  

(04-15-2016 02:30 PM)CrashBangWallop Wrote:  

If you're eating dinner, the way to do it is to ask her what she fancies before the waiter re-appears.

Then take control and order for her.

I think actually choosing anyone else's food, 99% of the time, is weird.

No, like I said in the above comment, I've never chosen food for a date, jsut relayed what she wanted to the waiter/waitress.

This is perfectly fine, I do it most the time.

I ask what she's decided on and then when the waitress returns I say "she'll have......"

Now, it's not going to be the best choice all the time, depends on the girl, you have to judge for yourself.

[Pride male]

Delete.

[joost]

My girl is vegetarian. I usually take her to a BBQ house. I order ribs for me and beef for her. We start with a caesar salad and I eat half of her plate to show her who's the boss (and to enjoy lovely ribs).

Thanks to my genetics, Im not fat.

As for dates, see what makes her comfortable. Sometimes I open the car door to look like a gentleman and grab her ass so she knows I'm a dick also.

[GlobalMan]

Response to Pride Male deleted.

[911]

(04-15-2016 02:32 PM)johnbozzz Wrote:  

(04-15-2016 02:30 PM)CrashBangWallop Wrote:  

If you're eating dinner, the way to do it is to ask her what she fancies before the waiter re-appears.

Then take control and order for her.

I think actually choosing anyone else's food, 99% of the time, is weird.

No, like I said in the above comment, I've never chosen food for a date, jsut relayed what she wanted to the waiter/waitress.

Yeah, that's fine bozzz, good approach bro, you should definitely take charge of the ordering process, and as you've noted that should include getting her input before you place the order.

I'm a wine and beer expert, so I will order the wine for both of us and she will appreciate that, as most American women are intimidated by wine lists. Even if you date French or Italian women who know their wine, they will expect you to pick the wine for them. Part of your basic dining game should be to learn your wines and spirits (single malts).

Also as a foodie with extensive travel experience I will guide her food selections. A woman should be good in the kitchen, if she's a picky eater or a lousy cook, that's a one or two demerit points. It's also an important "tell" about her background, a broad that's a terrible cook has in all likelihood grown up with a mother that didn't make the effort to provide quality meals for her family, and will therefore carry that flaw from having had a bad role model growing up.

As to the door holding, nothing wrong with that, in fact most women that you would want to date will appreciate it. You won't look like "an underling" if you're not groveling to her in the rest of your interactions.

[scorpion]

Response to GlobalMan's response to Pride Male deleted.

[Ensam]

If it's a girl I know well and we're at a nice place I'll pick her food and order for her. Girls who are down for this will love it. Has to be well calibrated though. Wouldn't do it early on in a relationship - though I'm not really taking new girls out to dinner these days anyway.

[Truly]

When I make reservations, I typically put in a special request for one menu only (which will be handed to me) and order for her. At the same time, however, I always choose the place and it's typically one she's never been to. It always works for me and at worst she'll just seem surprised. Also, always remember to ask her ahead of time what she likes/dislikes/allergic to.

This mainly applies to first dates because I wouldn't be doing this tactic with the same girl on several dates (it would be weird and too canned).

[PapayaTapper]

If I'm feeding her that means Im fucking her.

(If I haven't banged her yet I'm cooking dinner because.. well...my dining room is the closest one to my bedroom)

If I'm fucking her and we go to dinner for the first time I always go to one of the restaurants I know really well.

There I'll ask her a couple of questions about what she likes then "In that case I suggest the such and such or the yada yada. They're really good here" She'll make her choice the when the server comes back...

PT "We're going to start with the blah blah and the young lady will have the such and such..."

When the server leaves..."I think we should save room for dessert",,,with a smirk.

That's code for a papaya flavored dicksicle

[Bacchus]

It depends on what role you have assigned to her.

For a slampiece or lower, let her order her own meal. Although I typically avoid food when seeing a girl casually (or even leaving my apartment), sometimes I can't avoid it. At this point, try to maintain your distance (and her independence).

For your girlfriend, you order for her. Restaurant dates are for girls you know aren't sleeping with other men. She will value you taking control. And if she doesn't, why are you in a relationship with her?

[HankMoody]

I always order for my date.

Feedback: "I'm not used to someone doing everything for me, but I like it."

I select the restaurant and then order for her.

[kaotic]

Why are you taking bitches you haven't fucked on dates ?

Not that I want to open up the whole apps thread again.

I only do drinks, if a girl can't make up her mind about a drink or a beer, I'll tell them to grab something (I got a knack for good beers), or I'll grab 2 of what I'm having.

If she isn't 21 and we grab coffee (rarely) I'll let her order whatever she wants, I just get some tea or something.

Opening doors never came as a gentleman thing to do, I just did because people did it for me.

Opening car doors, usually I'm in ramble mode as we walk out towards the car, then as I'm opening the door I'm still talking, pause, and continue the story. I never make a good deal about it, and usually it's only on the first date. It's earned, for only an LTR.

[HankMoody]

(04-15-2016 04:38 PM)kaotic Wrote:  

Why are you taking bitches you haven't fucked on dates ?

Not that I want to open up the whole apps thread again.

I only do drinks, if a girl can't make up her mind about a drink or a beer, I'll tell them to grab something (I got a knack for good beers), or I'll grab 2 of what I'm having.

If she isn't 21 and we grab coffee (rarely) I'll let her order whatever she wants, I just get some tea or something.

Opening doors never came as a gentleman thing to do, I just did because people did it for me.

Opening car doors, usually I'm in ramble mode as we walk out towards the car, then as I'm opening the door I'm still talking, pause, and continue the story. I never make a good deal about it, and usually it's only on the first date. It's earned, for only an LTR.

If you're buying a woman food who you haven't banged, you're wasting cash.

[The_e_man]

I ask her what she wants and we both look through the menu together. I order for her every time. They love it.

When her drink starts getting low, I also order her the next round without saying anything about it to her beforehand.

Call me a beta supplicator, but there's little things like that that I actually enjoy doing for a beautiful woman that is pleasant company.

[kaotic]

(04-15-2016 06:44 PM)The_e_man Wrote:  

Call me a beta supplicator, but there's little things like that that I actually enjoy doing for a beautiful woman that is pleasant company.

But did you bang ?

Give them an inch, they'll take a mile sooner or later.

I get the pleasant company with a cool/beautiful girls, just don't make it a habit.

Hell, I've had girls buy me drinks for flaking, or being late. Some girls will even whip out there debit cards. If that happens, I'll decline their card, tell them to buy the next round, which they usually do.

[Onto]

(04-15-2016 12:08 PM)johnbozzz Wrote:  

One of the few things I've continued to do is order for dates at bars and restaurants, even food carts. This seems to have worked better was I was in high school. Now, girls just bitch, "What? You think I can't order myself?".
Guys, it is actually worth it to keep this up? Should I keep holding open doors for young girls (I'll always do it for the elderly, though).
What do you advise?

Well, if that happened to me I would be tempted to call the waiter back over to cancel the order and then leave the restaurant. Might cost you the bang, but you wouldn't have paid for it with your principles.

Alternatively, you could respond, "Oh, I'm sorry. Will you be paying your own way"?

Of course, this kind of dialog cuts to the quick in regards to each person's view on gender roles. But she did start it, so you might as well finish it.

[Saweeep]

(04-15-2016 07:18 PM)Onto Wrote:  

(04-15-2016 12:08 PM)johnbozzz Wrote:  

One of the few things I've continued to do is order for dates at bars and restaurants, even food carts. This seems to have worked better was I was in high school. Now, girls just bitch, "What? You think I can't order myself?".
Guys, it is actually worth it to keep this up? Should I keep holding open doors for young girls (I'll always do it for the elderly, though).
What do you advise?

Well, if that happened to me I would be tempted to call the waiter back over to cancel the order and then leave the restaurant. Might cost you the bang, but you wouldn't have paid for it with your principles.

Let's assume that he's got the bang already (cause we all know you don't take girls out to dinner that you haven't slammed already).

This is just another shit test.

He's not passing it because his frame isn't dominant enough to pull it off...something is making him not congruent in the eyes of the girl.

If a girl said this to me in front of the server I'd just laugh and say "awww" and perhaps "she's cute isn't she" to the waiter/ess, then carry on ordering.

As for opening doors...sure...just make sure this is always accompanied by a slap on the ass as she saunters through.