[Sketness]

I meet this girl outside of a bar. Wee changed numbers and a couple of days later we meet for coffee.

During the meet she is giving me all of the signs that she likes me. We continues to text in the coming weeks and our schedules finally match up where we both have a free day

I inviter her over to my house to hang out. She comes over we go get food, and come back to my house. I have a bottle of wine at my house and we open that and start watching Netflix's.

Around 15mins into the movie we start hooking making out and dry humping. Everything is going great until I start to make a move to take her pants off. She shakes her head no. Cool no problem

I resent start making out then try again,same thing. I try three times , then I ask if she is a virgin she says no.

Then I say: I don't mind not having sex I just mind can't having sex

To that she says:what does that mean (with her arms crossed)and starts to get a little stand off ish

I verbally work my way around what I said by explaining that sex is just a small part of getting to know someone and that on the grand skem of things that getting to know someone and hanging out with them is more important to me and that overall I'm cool not having sex today.

(She was on top of me ) she says she has to go to the bathroom

At this point I could kick my self for fucking up so bad

She comes back and I act like nothing happened

Later she is getting ready to leave when we get talking

She told me that she had a stalker guy in the past that when she wouldn't have sex with him he called her a bitch lesbian and wouldn't let her go home.

I then revisited what had happened eairlier by just being honest with her reiterating that for me sex is a small part of getting to know someone and that I my motives go beyond just having sex.

She seemed to be ok with that answer (though her arms were still crossed)

I make a joke to ease the tension,she laughs and I give her a hug and a kiss good bye

Now in your opinion how bad did i fuck up and can I recover from this?

[kinjutsu]

I think she was on her period and she became standoff-ish when you said " I don't mind not having sex I just mind can't having sex".
Its ok to push physically every so often but i think in this case she wasn't comfortable enough with you to fuck on her period.

You can totally recover from this by not mentioning it anymore.
Pretend it didn't happen. Do the same things you were doing before.
Try to meet up with her about 7 days later to be sure though.

[Phoenix]

Yes, never mention the elephant in the room. It kills the tension. You cannot reason your way into a woman, you have to emotion your way in.

[Sketness]

@kinjutsu that makes a lot of sense because she went to the bathroom at least two times so her on her period makes sense

[Mr Finish]

Too much dialogue, when things get hot and heavy, can cock block.

[GlobalMan]

"Then I say: I don't mind not having sex I just mind can't having sex"

That's where you went wrong. There was no need to say that.

Girls do want to play the game- they just don't want it spoken.

You reset and try again later, if still no go, then thats the way it goes sometimes. Could be period, who knows. You're not always going to get first date bang. Talking about it will only kill the mood and possibly the chance next time.

Once you're better at reading a women you'll usually be able to tell the general reason why she's saying no. Then you'll know the best course of action. A "no" due to period will usually be apologetic, especially if you've been dry humping and going at it like you described. Other "no's" will be made in different tones/with different body language.

From what you described, I think you'll recover from it fine.

[Sketness]

The next day I sent her a safety text

Me:did you have fun yesterday

Her: you mean with you? ( she went to a birthday party after we hung out )

Me: with me yea

Her:Yeah it was fine. Just what you said made me think about it a little different but it's all good

I think I'm still in it, I'm just not going to say shit about it any more and act like it never happened.

[Remington]

After you said that weird thing to her, she is now going to approach you with extreme caution. Women like to dwell on the past, so this won't be the greatest situation for you.

You do have the ability to over come it. The thing you need to do is rebuild that rapport and get that connection back. This won't be too hard, just work with it over text every once and a while and try to schedule a meet up. The meet up should be in a public place. If you try to invite her back to your place again, that will signal to her that you will try to fuck her again. Keep things light and casual for the next go around to reaffirm your previous position.

[Merenguero]

O.P. you're way overthinking things and overanalyzing them. I didn't even make it through your post. If you have a girl alone in a private place, are making out with her, and she isn't rejecting any kind of touching, just unzip your pants and whip it out. As far as I've seen, once you have gotten that far, there is almost a zero percent chance of her bolting or having you charged with indecent exposure. If she does she is probably really crazy. After I do that the girl almost always starts touching my dick and/or giving me a handjob and if you are getting a handjob, there is usually a very good chance that sex will happen very soon. Once she has her hand on my dick for a minute or two, I ask if she can take her top off. I've never taken off a girls shirt, dress, pants, bra, or underware. They almost always take it off when I ask them, but I get a lot of these girls who are really self conscience and then insist that they only take of their top and/or pants in the dark. I'm talking about girls with model bodies being that embarrassed. Maybe that's unique to me. I don't know. If you are kissing and touching and are in private, whip it out, and sex will usually follow. There are times when a girl is on her period and for some reason is embarrassed to come out and say it and gives me a handjob, but refuses to go any further. Those are rare, but they happen. Once in a while you will get a girl who won't run out of the room, but will tell you to put it back in after a few seconds. I don't have a lot of patience with those girls and usually don't pursue sex any further, at least on that same day.

[Kona]

(02-19-2016 07:44 PM)Sketness Wrote:  

The next day I sent her a safety text

Me:did you have fun yesterday

Her: you mean with you? ( she went to a birthday party after we hung out )

Me: with me yea

Her:Yeah it was fine. Just what you said made me think about it a little different but it's all good

I think I'm still in it, I'm just not going to say shit about it any more and act like it never happened.

I bet she went to the birthday party to bang some dude. She didn't want sex pussy, she wanted to be fresh.

If I were you I'd completely back off and let her come to you.

Aloha!

[Sketness]

Well looks like I have my work cut out for me…you win some you learn some

[Comte De St. Germain]

Any time you think you've possibly fucked up odds are you fucked up.

[el mechanico]

The freeze is alive and well. Don't ever doubt it.

[WestIndianArchie]

Doesn't seem like you got enough
- attraction
- comfort and rapport

And you seemed to have your foot on the gas the whole time.

In a situation where the girl likes you, but you know you haven't run her through the matrix, she's essentially making all the decisions without your influence and input.

People have sex like this all the time, but it's not game, because you aren't doing much other than being a horn dog.

Mix hormones and alcohol and stir.

WIA

[Turnus]

(02-19-2016 07:44 PM)Sketness Wrote:  

The next day I sent her a safety text

Me:did you have fun yesterday

Her: you mean with you? ( she went to a birthday party after we hung out )

Me: with me yea

Her:Yeah it was fine. Just what you said made me think about it a little different but it's all good

I think I'm still in it, I'm just not going to say shit about it any more and act like it never happened.

This was a bad text, don't ask her if she had fun. Reinforce they idea that she had fun. Maintain frame. See how she replied to you with a "Meh" type of answer.