[Herr Dickenstein]

This might be kinda funny for some of you more seasoned players out there, but I'm really struggling with this. Here's some background info. I met this girl on a dating site and she's really cool except for the fact that she lives in a small northern Croatian town that only has coffeshops, restaurants and hiking trails. I don't have a car (a huge dealbreaker, everything would have been easier if I had a car) so I usually take a bus to her place where we go grab a coffee. I really don't mind taking a long bus ride or even paying the overpriced ticket because I'm financially better off than she is and I wouldn't want her to go bankrupt travelling to my town instead.

Now, the problem is that I really want to take her out on a cool, exciting and memorable date and stick out from the rest of the guys who are taking her on boring coffee dates. These coffees are already getting tedious even though the first one was a success, as I already kissed her within the first hour and I could tell that she's really into me. Our relationship cannot consist of taking a bus ride to XY town and then going for a coffee on the main square. But there's no museums, movie theaters, lunaparks, zoos or *anything* interesting and I don't have a car so I can't drive us anywhere. I can't even take her out for a walk (which is something that I usually do) because it's cold and she's not the hiking type.

And before you even mention it, there's no logistics for a bang yet. Once again, if I had a car it wouldn't be a problem.

tl;dr we're stuck in a small town without any content and I don't know what we should do because I can't take her out anywhere interesting, we're only going out for coffee

[LA Savage]

1st thing you need to do is stop putting her on a Pedestal. You are trying to treat this girl as if she is some type of prize by attempting to win her over by having amazing dates and paying for her stuff.

You've been on 4 dates with her in which you travel far to see her and pay for her meals and all you have done with her is kissing. That is a huge problem and has to stop. Have her come to you. Stop worrying about her financial situation. If she really likes you she will figure out a way to get to you.

You met her online and already have oneitis for her. In your post you say "Our relationship". Stop saying that because your not in a relationship. You just went on 4 dates with a girl that's all. Stop going on dates with her until you get logistics figured out.

You said you can't take her out on walks because it's too cold outside.
Why can't you just go directly to her house and watch movies or do some other indoor leisure activity with her? Her place would be great for logistics.

[Herr Dickenstein]

(01-12-2016 04:22 AM)LA Savage Wrote:  

1st thing you need to do is stop putting her on a Pedestal. You are trying to treat this girl as if she is some type of prize by attempting to win her over by having amazing dates and paying for her stuff.

Although I'm doing the best I can to keep emotional distance, the need for an amazing date derives from the fact that she's quite... popular and I'm not the only guy trying to lock her down. The competition is fierce. She even showed me messages from some truly pathetic beta males and we both laughed at them. I know for a fact that several other guys also took her out on coffee.

And I don't want to be just another dude with whom she drinks coffee with. If I want an actual chance with her, we need to experience something interesting together and make some memories that don't involve sitting at a bar.

(01-12-2016 04:22 AM)LA Savage Wrote:  

You've been on 4 dates with her in which you travel far to see her and pay for her meals and all you have done with her is kissing. That is a huge problem and has to stop. Have her come to you. Stop worrying about her financial situation. If she really likes you she will figure out a way to get to you.

Actually, it's been 3 dates so far.

And we can't go to her house because she lives with her parents.

[cascadecombo]

So if you don't mind paying the tickets to go there, have you considered sending her a ticket to come to you?

Even that seems a bit much, does she not live alone?

[LA Savage]

(01-12-2016 04:30 AM)Herr Dickenstein Wrote:  

Although I'm doing the best I can to keep emotional distance, the need for an amazing date derives from the fact that she's quite... popular and I'm not the only guy trying to lock her down. The competition is fierce. She even showed me messages from some truly pathetic beta males and we both laughed at them. I know for a fact that several other guys also took her out on coffee.

And I don't want to be just another dude with whom she drinks coffee with. If I want an actual chance with her, we need to experience something interesting together and make some memories that don't involve sitting at a bar.

Actually, it's been 3 dates so far.

And we can't go to her house because she lives with her parents.

All I hear is excuses and you putting her on a pedestal. You met her on an online dating site. You said you she showed you messages of other guys messaging her and you both started laughing. How do you know she is not laughing at you with another guy doing the same thing? You are an orbiter right now and you are investing all your time and money in her without her investing anything in you. You even said she is going out with other guys on coffee dates as well. She is just holding you for attention bro. Stop being like the other guys and cut her lose. If she really wants you she will find a way to come see you on. Stop trying to have some amazing Hollywood style dates with some random chick you haven't even fucked yet. She has not earned those experiences yet.

It's unfortunate you live in a small town and are desperate to get with this girl since you said there aren't any decent options in your town. But please save yourself the trouble and find some other girl who actually likes you and is willing to invest in you.

[Herr Dickenstein]

(01-12-2016 04:48 AM)LA Savage Wrote:  

All I hear is excuses and you putting her on a pedestal. You met her on an online dating site. You said you she showed you messages of other guys messaging her and you both started laughing. How do you know she is not laughing at you with another guy doing the same thing?

I keep that in mind all the time and avoid texting anything pathetic. It's mostly just a bunch of witty comebacks and teasing. I can tell she genuinly likes my text game because she actually takes time to write long and meaningful replies rather than just "ok", "haha" or shit like that, like she does in messages with other guys she has shown me.

Text game is probably my strongest point, I successfully passed all the shit tests because I have a lot of experience in texting from previous girls I've dated. She keeps pushing me to say I like her because she's used to hearing that from other guys, but I just keep her on the edge over text without writing anything specific, while physically escalating in person.

Regardless of that, I still need some imaginative ideas for a date. What the hell can we do in a town without any content?

Also, I guess I should mention that she DID come here last time, but I don't want to write anything specific about what we were doing because I'm really paranoid of someone reading this. Small town syndrome. Now it's my turn to go to her place again.

[OGNorCal707]

Bro... This is not good.
You are exuding scarcity mentality.

The competition is fierce?
What the fuck man.

Understand me. No more dates.
It's time to bang.

This shorty is playing the field,
Laughing up the dudes who have no hope.
Does she tell you about the guys she actually likes?
There are levels to this shit...
Do you have any other prospects lined up?
I think I recognize who has the most Game in this situation.

She will use you for entertainment until she tires of you.
Seems like she lives in some poe-dunk part of the world.
It's either your herculean efforts to be with on a quasi-plutonic level
Or watching shit dry on a stick.
It's not a victory.

Have her come to your place. To bang.
If you go there again, be prepared to rent a room, to bang.
CASE CLOSED.
Otherwise, NO MORE DATES.

Take that pussy of the pedestal fam.

Fuck her financial situation,
What about your divine right to cum?
She's not meeting you halfway dude.
She's not investing her body.
Yet your traversing the country, for what?
A cappuccino & a kiss close?
Lemme tell you this, get some fire under your belly.
The "competition" she doesn't tell you about,
Is getting way more than that for his efforts.

RVF is not going to supply you with ideas for an imaginative date.
We ain't about that.

[Herr Dickenstein]

There already would have been a bang if I lived somewhere else, but you can't equally apply the game everywhere. We're talking about a small, conservative catholic town in Eastern Europe. Everyone knows each other. Kissing in public pretty much means that you're in a relationship because half of the town is going to talk about you the next day. Besides, I'm currently more interested in locking her down in a relationship, the bang will naturally come later. If I rush things, nothing good will come out of it. Trust me, almost no one here has sex before at least a month or two of semi-serious relationship.

I do realize what the situation may sound like from my posts, but it's definitely not a one sided chase. I'm playing it cool and keeping her on the edge the entire time. She's the one who always starts texting me first and she happily agreed to come visit me last time, but now it's my turn to go to her place again.

I only need one more good date to truly lock her down, but I can't come up with anything exciting.

[Vienna]

You don't have your own place? She doesn't have her own place?

Get a hotel room. Bang at a friend's house.

You need to bang her now to stand out from "the competition". Ideally sooner than the 4th date, which is pushing it (even by EE standards?).

Off-topic: I've never been to EE. How common is it to bang on a first date? Is it possible to zero-date bang an EE girl?

[Herr Dickenstein]

(01-12-2016 06:10 AM)DarianFrey Wrote:  

You don't have your own place? She doesn't have her own place?

Get a hotel room. Bang at a friend's house.

You need to bang her now to stand out from "the competition". Ideally sooner than the 4th date, which is pushing it (even by EE standards?).

Off-topic: I've never been to EE. How common is it to bang on a first date? Is it possible to zero-date bang an EE girl?

Dude, bang is definitely not an option before at least a few more dates. Over here (in these rural parts and among people I know and talk to, not the country in general) you first have to be in a relationship, get to know someone really well and only then is it socially acceptable to initiate sex, when the trust is established.

You can't be some kind of sleazy Latino lover who takes a girl to his place after a couple of dates, it'd only make you seem like a pathetic horndog and most likely end up in no-contact. Pushing for sex too early is not a characteristic of a dominant alpha male, just a weakling who can't control his impulses. It's the real-life equivalent of guys on tinder who open with pathetic lines like 'you turn my software into hardware'

With that being said, you can easily pick up girls at a club or some other more appropriate places for such interactions. But those aren't GF materials anyway.

[Vienna]

(01-12-2016 06:24 AM)Herr Dickenstein Wrote:  

Dude, bang is definitely not an option before at least a few more dates. Over here (in these rural parts and among people I know and talk to, not the country in general) you first have to be in a relationship, get to know someone really well and only then is it socially acceptable to initiate sex, when the trust is established.

You can't be some kind of sleazy Latino lover who takes a girl to his place after a couple of dates, it'd only make you seem like a pathetic horndog and most likely end up in no-contact. Pushing for sex too early is not a characteristic of a dominant alpha male, just a weakling who can't control his impulses. It's the real-life equivalent of guys on tinder who open with pathetic lines like 'you turn my software into hardware'

With that being said, you can easily pick up girls at a club or some other more appropriate places for such interactions. But those aren't GF materials anyway.

I disagree.

This is extremely rehashed, but 'weaklings' don't make their intentions known. They talk and talk and wait for the perfect moment, or for the girl to to make an overt sign that says "I'm ready!" It's passive and reactive, thus weak.

If you make it known to a girl that you want to bang her in an assertive way, you'll stand out. Going for sex and failing on the first date gets you further than taking a girl on 4 dates. See BlurredSeven's quality thread on zero date bangs for proof.

Of course you need to calibrate based on where you are in the world, but acting assertively gets you further.

Getting stressed over creating the perfect 4th date should tell you that you are investing a great deal in her. We've all been there bro.

Have you at least kissed her/made out with her yet? Even if you're playing the long game, girls get bored eventually.

[Guitarman]

I agree, 4th date is time to bang. ( if not before date four). What works for me now she knows you a bit is to invite her to your place for a meal, wine and watch a DVD.

You should both be in bed getting down to business before the DVD is finished. If not, then you and her are finished.

Isolate, escalate, impress with your home cooking skills and BANG! Best thing is this is a cheap date.

[Herr Dickenstein]

(01-12-2016 06:59 AM)DarianFrey Wrote:  

I disagree.

This is extremely rehashed, but 'weaklings' don't make their intentions known. They talk and talk and wait for the perfect moment, or for the girl to to make an overt sign that says "I'm ready!" It's passive and reactive, thus weak.

If you make it known to a girl that you want to bang her in an assertive way, you'll stand out. Going for sex and failing on the first date gets you further than taking a girl on 4 dates. See BlurredSeven's quality thread on zero date bangs for proof.

Of course you need to calibrate based on where you are in the world, but acting assertively gets you further.

Getting stressed over creating the perfect 4th date should tell you that you are investing a great deal in her. We've all been there bro. Have you at least kissed her/made out with her yet?

We'll eventually do it sooner or later, but I just don't think it's the time yet. Of course I made out with her, I already mentioned that in the first post. I deliberately wanted to escalate quickly on the first date which is probably what kept her interested in me because the other two dates were rather boring. I have to find a way to make up for it.

However, pushing for sex on the 4th date seems like an overkill in this situation. Not to mention impossible, because now it's my turn to go to her town again and it's logistically impossible to do anything there.

The reason why I'm stressing so much about the 4th date is because it's a turning point. If it goes well, she will become even more infatuated with me, it'll be her turn come to my place next time and then I can start thinking about escalating to the maximum. However, if it's just another coffeshop conversation it'll already get tedious and I'll merely end up being one of the guys she went out for coffee with.

[Guitarman]

I'm starting to wonder about Mr Dick-in-Stein after reading this;

"You can't be some kind of sleazy Latino lover who takes a girl to his place after a couple of dates, it'd only make you seem like a pathetic horndog and most likely end up in no-contact. Pushing for sex too early is not a characteristic of a dominant alpha male, just a weakling who can't control his impulses. It's the real-life equivalent of guys on tinder who open with pathetic lines like 'you turn my software into hardware' "

That's tantamount to game - denial, along with all the self limiting belief stuff he has posted.

[Vienna]

(01-12-2016 04:48 AM)LA Savage Wrote:  

(01-12-2016 04:30 AM)Herr Dickenstein Wrote:  

Although I'm doing the best I can to keep emotional distance, the need for an amazing date derives from the fact that she's quite... popular and I'm not the only guy trying to lock her down. The competition is fierce. She even showed me messages from some truly pathetic beta males and we both laughed at them. I know for a fact that several other guys also took her out on coffee.

And I don't want to be just another dude with whom she drinks coffee with. If I want an actual chance with her, we need to experience something interesting together and make some memories that don't involve sitting at a bar.

Actually, it's been 3 dates so far.

And we can't go to her house because she lives with her parents.

All I hear is excuses and you putting her on a pedestal. You met her on an online dating site. You said you she showed you messages of other guys messaging her and you both started laughing. How do you know she is not laughing at you with another guy doing the same thing? You are an orbiter right now and you are investing all your time and money in her without her investing anything in you. You even said she is going out with other guys on coffee dates as well. She is just holding you for attention bro. Stop being like the other guys and cut her lose. If she really wants you she will find a way to come see you on. Stop trying to have some amazing Hollywood style dates with some random chick you haven't even fucked yet. She has not earned those experiences yet.

It's unfortunate you live in a small town and are desperate to get with this girl since you said there aren't any decent options in your town. But please save yourself the trouble and find some other girl who actually likes you and is willing to invest in you.

Actually, I'm more for this now that I've read more about your situation.

Do you think she's on an internet forum obsessing over how to impress you?

Since you met her online and she's told you she's going on dates with others (a next in itself), she's probably seeing guys closer to her... Something which you should be doing with other girls.

[The Black Knight]

Assuming the logistics are shit (no where to bang on either end) and you live in a small religious town where girls are afraid of being slut shamed and you need a 4th date idea:

LEAVE TOWN. Weekend getaway somewhere fun/exciting/interesting. Even the most uptight good girls turn into sluts when away from home. I've had my share of "good girls" who've told me it would be weeks or months before sex would happen. I just kept escalating, pushing the ball down field, and never showed any shame or doubt for wanting them in a sexual manner. They usually make it no further than 3 dates before my cock "accidentally" slips in (because of THEIR actions) while we are fooling around naked.

In my deepest of blue pill days, I dealt with one of the most sexually uptight women in history and STILL got the bang on a trip away from town. It took constant escalating throughout the day and after like 90 minutes of dry humping in the evening with my shorts on, she FINALLY caved and said: "Go grab a condom!" Point is: get a girl away from town and her sexual "rules" go out the window AND you can run really shitty game AND still get the bang as long as you escalate.

To save face, she might need to come up with a cover story.

A short trip is risky to do before the bang but I've done it in a similar situations to yours as mentioned (no logistics on either end + sexually uptight women) and have always gotten the bang on the trip. Even in my blue pill days.

Your frame sucks though and you ripe to get taken advantage of. If you can do this without spending much money and not getting overly invested, it could work out well. I would make her pay for shit in someway to be honest; make sure she is invested in some capacity to minimize the chance she isn't just tagging along for a free trip. Getting transport to/from your location and 1 or 2 nights in a moderately priced hotel should be pretty cheap if you split it. Believe me, if she wants your dick bad enough, she will pay for herself even if she barely has any money.

[LA Savage]

What is up with you and this courting process.

I said it once and I'll say it again. Stop putting this girl on a pedestal.

All your doing is making excuses why you can't do this or that.

You keep trying to prove yourself worthy of her time yet she is doing nothing to prove herself worthy to you.

What makes you different from the other guys she is dating. You keep blaming your small town as to why you can't make a move, hang out in public, etc...

Then you go on to say you have to be in a relationship with her in order to fuck her.


You want us to help you complete mission impossible yet you refuse to listen to our advice.

You're setting yourself up for failure and disappointment.

This girl is on a dating website going out with multiple guys and you're trying to paint us this image that she is a good girl from a conservative town.

Excuses, Excuses, Excuses.

Watch this video carefully and learn from it.

[LongDongSilver]

Take her to a scenic area and have sex, you are orbiting in a huge way right now I would personally dog on her for even having the nerve to show me those texts what an impudent young Trollope. GUARANTEED she is fucking someone else that realizes you don't need to be in a bedroom to slip at least some fingers into that snatch.

[Gmac]

Have a picnic at a bus stop so she can understand what lengths you take just to see her.

[Off The Reservation]

(01-12-2016 04:07 AM)Herr Dickenstein Wrote:  

I wouldn't want her to go bankrupt travelling to my town instead. ......

..... I really want to take her out on a cool, exciting and memorable date and stick out from the rest of the guys who are taking her on boring coffee dates......

.....we're only going out for coffee

Would you mind an honest reply?

1. Buy a fucking car. What is this difference of her money and yours? She has 200 euros and you have 300 euros??? Who cares, worry about yours.
2. Instead of saying, "honey i dont want you to spend your money so ill buy you a ticket to come here and not bang me," say "i dont care if you spend your last euro, buy a ticket here for the bang of your life, dont worry ill get the hotel."
3. You are the boring guy. It takes time to do the things in life that make you more interesting to yourself and to her. Start today, I dont know what it is but there is something you can do to make yourself more "interesting" that doesn't involve wearing goggles in a bar.

Another guy is banging your virgin now while you read this.

But its ok! I believe your question comes from 100% sincere desire to learn, there will be more and more chicks and you will do better next time.

[Herr Dickenstein]

Crisis averted.

I set us up a pretty cool date in my town. Now I only have to think of some excuse to drag her home and attempt the bang.

[Vienna]

(01-13-2016 04:19 AM)Herr Dickenstein Wrote:  

Crisis averted.

I set us up a pretty cool date in my town. Now I only have to think of some excuse to drag her home and attempt the bang.

"I have a bottle of wine I've been meaning to try back at my place. Let's have a glass."

"I just downloaded 22 Jump Street. Let's watch it at my place."

Lead her. Since this is the 4th date I assume you've kissed/made out with her? Make sure to progress the touching and kissing during the date, so that when you suggest going to yours it doesn't come out of left field. She'll know what's up.

Will you drink alcohol at the date?

Update us on how it went.

[Khan]

Herr Dickenstein,

you seem to be somewhere in the so-called 'Bargaining' phase of learning game. You can read about it here:

http://www.rooshv.com/the-7-stages-of-being-a-player

You've received plenty of good advice from guys in this thread. Even if you can't accept and digest everything they've told you, don't worry, in time you'll get everything. Just keep going.

I have personally just recently left the 'Depression' phase, and I feel I'm currently somewhere close to 'Success'. So I'm not qualified to give you quality advice, but I can share a story that will hopefully resonate with you and motivate you to change your way of thinking. I apologize if its too long, I don't want you to think I'm trying to hijack your thread or something.

The story is set roughly 2,5 years ago. I was a 27-year old virgin who'd just discovered the manosphere and Game after a lifetime of disappointments with women and life. I began to read Game material and was immediately drawn to it. It was all so fascinating and new to me - not only Game but also the underlying social philosophy the Red Pill entails. I kept on reading and reading, but I didn't have balls to begin practicing what I read.

After a couple of months though, I got fatigued from all that shit. I guess it was too much for me at the time, so I regressed back into the Bargaining phase (the one you're in now). I remember thinking how maybe game isn't something mandatory for a man. I kept looking at some couples I knew and reminded myself that these betas found nice and decent girlfriends, and they weren't players in any way. I remember it clearly, my line of thinking was something like this:

"I should just keep on making small steps in life, improving myself, and the right girl will just fall into my lap. There are still decent women out there, a man just has to be patient to find her. I mean, all those betas like myself did it, right? All those players are up to no good, can't they see that eventually they'll get old and end up alone and miserable? When you look at it, game itself is also a way of pedestalizing women, they just don't see it."

In this stage, I was ripe to get my ass handed to me by life. And so it happened. It wasn't anything major, just an event that shattered all my illusions about women and propelled me to the right track.

It was two years ago. I met her at a dance class and immediately developed oneitis for her. She was average looking, but I instantly noticed that she was somewhat reserved and shy. I also noticed she was very religious, family-oriented and hardworking; she even did some volunteering work for local charity organizations. She always dressed modestly. I thought to myself, this one definitely doesn't ride the carousel. Yep, she's the one! She did have occasional bouts of passive aggressive behavior and casual neuroticism, but everyone has their faults, right?

Anyway, when I first asked her out she politely rejected. She said she already had plans for the weekend. The next week I asked again (a guy has to be persistent to win a girl over, right?), and she accepted. I felt very happy for myself; after several unsuccessful attempts, finally I managed to get a girl to go on a date with me. It was in vain, as nothing happened on our date. I asked her out on a second date, but she rejected me again. OK, I guess. I was dissapointed but I decided not to pursue her anymore as she obviously didn't like me.

And now comes the interesting part: I don't know how, but I managed to get rid of my oneitis for her almost instantly. This opened my eyes and I began to notice something that was in front of my eyes for the whole time, but I never saw it because I was blinded by this girl.

It was our dance instructor. He was in his early forties, divorced, slightly chubby, always ungroomed, never paid any attention to his looks. However, he was a natural alpha - very extroverted and outgoing, great sense of humor (at times even very rude). His game (if he had any) was literally caveman-like. Oh, and did I mention that his girlfriend was a hot 20-year old piece of ass who once claimed he punched her with his fist during an argument? He was by no means a bad person, but he certainly wasn't someone any decent parent would want to have as a son-in-law.

Let me ask you a question. What do you think, how did the girl I mentioned previously react to him?

Yep. Our wonderful, law-abiding, church-going, chaste, well-mannered unicorn was dripping wet for him from the moment she saw him. She was literally looking at him as if he were God or something, and I never even noticed. I have no illusions about what would've happened had he made a move on her. She would've dropped her panties instantly.

When I realized that, all of a sudden everything made sense to me. I was pissed off, but after a couple of days I decided to take this humorously. I told myself 'no more self-deprecating bullshit, time to get to work'. I got myself several new game resources and began to study game even deeper. 2 years later, I've improved, but that's not the point.

What I'm trying to say to you - there is no One Special Girl. Don't let your conservative surroundings or her decent character fool you. If you're not fucking her, then you're her girlfriend. It's that simple.

You'll find there are plenty of fish in the sea. Whatever you do with this girl, go on and try to work on more options. I wish you best of luck.

[Herr Dickenstein]

(01-13-2016 04:45 AM)DarianFrey Wrote:  

"I have a bottle of wine I've been meaning to try back at my place. Let's have a glass."

"I just downloaded 22 Jump Street. Let's watch it at my place."

Lead her. Since this is the 4th date I assume you've kissed/made out with her? Make sure to progress the touching and kissing during the date, so that when you suggest going to yours it doesn't come out of left field. She'll know what's up.

Will you drink alcohol at the date?

Update us on how it went.

Neither of us drink and the apartment I'll be taking her to is literally abandoned, there's some furniture left but no one has lived there in over 3 years. I'll have to come up with a really good excuse to take her to an empty apartment with little more than a bed. Any suggestions?

Also, Khan, thanks for sharing your story with us. It really goes to show that it's never too late to make a change. I remember when I turned 19 and though "oh fuck, I'm already 19 and I still didn't lose my virginity, there's no hope left for me". I do realize that this girl is far from perfect and I'm aware of her flaws. I'm completely aware of myself and my surroundings and I know that my emotions are clouding my judgement. She has a lot of red flags and any experienced player would advise me to either ignore her and move on or just hump & dump, but I like her despite that. And I know that she's not the one, that it'll all end up in me being hurt again, that she'll probably cheat on me and whatnot but I don't want to hop off the train before it reached it's destination. If nothing else, at least I'll gain some valuable life experience which I severely lack. I would honestly rather be stupid, fall in love and end up dumped and heartbroken than just sit at home and experience nothing.

[Malone]

Quote:

Neither of us drink and the apartment I'll be taking her to is literally abandoned, there's some furniture left but no one has lived there in over 3 years. I'll have to come up with a really good excuse to take her to an empty apartment with little more than a bed. Any suggestions?

Tell her you're taking her to your rape shack.

(01-13-2016 11:10 AM)Herr Dickenstein Wrote:  

Also, Khan, thanks for sharing your story with us. It really goes to show that it's never too late to make a change. I remember when I turned 19 and though "oh fuck, I'm already 19 and I still didn't lose my virginity, there's no hope left for me". I do realize that this girl is far from perfect and I'm aware of her flaws. I'm completely aware of myself and my surroundings and I know that my emotions are clouding my judgement. She has a lot of red flags and any experienced player would advise me to either ignore her and move on or just hump & dump, but I like her despite that. And I know that she's not the one, that it'll all end up in me being hurt again, that she'll probably cheat on me and whatnot but I don't want to hop off the train before it reached it's destination. If nothing else, at least I'll gain some valuable life experience which I severely lack. I would honestly rather be stupid, fall in love and end up dumped and heartbroken than just sit at home and experience nothing.

Brother, get that shit out of your head right now. That's straight up beta poison.

She's not the one, because there is no such thing. There's no soul mates.