I searched for any threads related to bar game and was not able to find any. If I was just inept and it exists, i would appreciate someone pointing me in the right direction.

I have noticed that bar game is much different then parties or kick backs. The girls at bars seem so much more stuck up and harder to get. I have friends that pull like crazy from the bar so obviously it is possible but i just have not had much success.

The bar i go to is always packed with tons of people its barely possible to even move. I live in Chico and the whole place is a college town.

I tried using threads to keep a convo going (as i read in Bang)i also tried to get this girl to dance and qualify to me. It seemed like it was going well she was flirting back getting into more risqué topics but then a frat dude came up and i completely lost her. With every girl i talked to, it seemed like they were interested for a little bit but then i lost there attention to some other dude. I did about 8 approaches last night and they all came to the same end. I don't know if my energy isn't high enough or if I'm just going about this the wrong way. Maybe i need to get more physical and direct faster?

What techniques are the most proficient for you guys at picking up girls in the bar setting?

Anyone?

I'll bite.

First, a word about bars. The returns from nightlife have been trending down. Social media and dating apps are driving this trend. Girls don't need to go to a bar to catch a dick. They can arrange one to be delivered on their smartphone. So, when they go out, they're seeking attention and validation more than sex. You still can score though. Any environment with drunk sluts has the possibility of sex, but girls are doing their best to prevent this from happening.

Second, let's talk about your venue choice. It sounds like you're going to high-energy dance bars, when your vibe doesn't match. You can barely walk around, and the girls can't hear a word you're saying. In that scenario, you're best game is non-verbal caveman. A strong physical presence or having girls with you will really help. But it sounds like you'd like a more subdued place. Where you can talk to the girls without having to compete for their attention at all time.

Third, how to guide the interaction. Once you've been talking to the girl for a while, you need to get her compliance. Get her to jump through a few hoops, to see if she's just killing time or if there's an attraction there. One I like to do is to move to another part of the bar. If you're standing up, take her someplace to sit down. If you're sitting down, go outside. Don't ask if she wants to sit down though. Just say, "Let's sit down for a second," and lead her to a couch. This does a few things. Most importantly, it separates her from her friends, who want to interfere with your progress. But it also gauges her interest. If she follows you, you know that she wants to keep the interaction going. That means you should move in for a kiss when you have her isolated.

Last, your goal is sex, not a phone number. Numbers are worthless. They are the lotto tickets of game. They might occasionally produce a winner, but don't count on it. If you can get her isolated and kiss, you have to try to leave with her. Again don't ask. Just say, "Let's get out of here." Hopefully, the venue is close to your apartment, so you can walk. But if not, a short drive is better than a long one.

Other guys take over and steal girls' attention consistently. What do you think you should do?

Quote: (01-22-2016 01:53 AM)Bacchus Wrote:  

Last, your goal is sex, not a phone number. Numbers are worthless. They are the lotto tickets of game. They might occasionally produce a winner, but don't count on it.

Quoted and Repped for Truth. Thanks for the new signature.

Give her something that most other guys can't give. Build a connection, Give her the sexiest dance of the night, crack mad jokes. Stand out in a good way, and when you go home with that number, she'll have a reason to remember you. You know the 80/20 rule? Aim to be in that 20%. Seems difficult, but honestly if you have a decent idea of what you're doing, you'll at least have a shot of being the guy she remembers at the end of the night.

Bachus gave you great advice OP especially with regards to actions you should take.

I think the issue is that those things will be difficult to execute without solid inner game. The reason other guys take over and steal the girls' attention consistently is due to your lack of inner game. The reason you think girls at bars are stuck up and harder to get is related to inner game. The reason you think your energy isn't high enough is due to lack of inner game.

It's not that I'm an expert at bar game. However, I know a thing or two about inner game. Not all girls that are open to banging a guy at a bar or any setting will be shitting sunshine. They'll put up a bitch shield so she can filter out the guys that are too scared to approach. These can be pleasant girls otherwise. Girls are noticing that you're approaching because you're forcing yourself to; not because you want to. Guys also notice it (so they AMOG you). You're not enjoying the interaction; that's why she isn't either and hence losing interest. Your body language is causing this. Body language is the manifestation of your inner confidence. If not developed to a certain point, it will not get you any interest until you get it fixed. However, it's like the "chicken or the egg concept." Approaching is at least marginally developing your inner confidence, yet you need inner confidence to do better approaches.

College is a social atmosphere man. You ain't social, you ain't good enough. Now that I've broken apart how inner game is getting in your way, I'd like to know more about your social profile. Reason being that it will help us gauge the level of your inner confidence and be better prepared to help you. This includes, the type of friends you hang out with, how you make jokes, how much you interact with strangers (and how), how much you work out (frat boys lift), how well you dress, and how much and how you smile. Let's hear where you're at with all this and figure out what you can do to slowly but surely change the situation. I guess I'll know from your response if you truly want to be better.

Also FYI, we cover inner game quite a bit on my podcast. Link in my signature below.

Be the friendliest guy in the room, and then make more friends.

You live in Chico, which is possibly one of the best places to get laid.

Also, join a fraternity to expand your social network when you go out. I know they have an Alpha Sig chapter, not sure what else

Quote: (01-22-2016 01:53 AM)Bacchus Wrote:  

Get her to jump through a few hoops, to see if she's just killing time or if there's an attraction there. One I like to do is to move to another part of the bar. If you're standing up, take her someplace to sit down. If you're sitting down, go outside. Don't ask if she wants to sit down though. Just say, "Let's sit down for a second," and lead her to a couch. This does a few things. Most importantly, it separates her from her friends, who want to interfere with your progress. But it also gauges her interest. If she follows you, you know that she wants to keep the interaction going. That means you should move in for a kiss when you have her isolated.

Solid advice Bacchus.

When I gamed abroad, and I knew I had to go for the one-night stand, I made sure to do exactly that. After a few minutes of the group conversation, I'd tell the girl, "It's loud in here, I can't hear you that well, let's step outside, but only for a minute or two," and start moving in that direction. Or, "Come with me to the bar, so that I can get a drink." You can also turn to her friends and add, "I'm going outside with Julia, I'll bring her back in a minute or two."

If after a few minutes of conversation, she won't sit down with you somewhere else, or she won't come outside, she probably won't go home with you that night. Politely exit the set with a smile, "It was nice meeting you girls. Enjoy your night." Walk and open the next set you can see, because the girls will probably still be watching you. If they see you are a social guy, it demonstrates value to them, and you can always re-open the first girl again later. I wish I could think of a great re-opener. Nothing is coming to me. Maybe someone reading this thread can contribute an idea for our newbie friend here.

From just reading your post, I sense you are a lower energy guy, who can be quickly outgamed by loud, bro-y frat guys. Roosh's lines in Bang are slightly sarcastic and slightly funny, which works if you are in a nice bar and you're wearing a blazer and you can say something like, "I hate it how everyone in this bar is concerned about looks and appearances....so what kind of car do you drive?" In a college bar, this stuff falls kind of flat. Roosh's lines are better than being a wallflower and failing to approach any girls, but in my opinion, they will not lead to pussy.

Try a few things:

1. Speak really loud, like louder than you think is comfortable. You have to project your voice at a noisy bar to stand out. Try speaking louder the next time you go out in at least three sets, just for practice.
2. Physical presence. Stand with your legs a little wider than your shoulders. Keep your neck pulled back so you aren't craning yourself towards her. If you want to put your hands somewhere, rest your thumbs in your pocket and have your fingers (led by your index fingers) point towards your package. It's a more dominant stance.
3. Facial expressions. Smile, practice smiling in front of a mirror. I'm going to send you a PM with specific advice on how to practice this right now.
4. Tease her. I'm really fucking bad at this. But it works at night game, especially in a bro-y environment. I'm not sure how to do this well.

Finally, if you know anyone, I mean anyone, who has some modicum of game, latch onto him and follow him for at least three or four sets. Tell him you'll buy him brunch or coffee the next day in exchange. While you are following him, really pay attention to how he acts and the things he says. Take notes on your phone if that's your style. Watch him, and watch the girl. See if she laughs at what he says or does. Do this, with the same guy, the following weekend. You will learn best by osmosis. It's something I never really got the opportunity to do in night game, and it made night game really, really frustrating for a long time. Don't make the same mistake I did.

Quote: (01-25-2016 11:04 PM)Jagnum Wrote:  

Quote: (01-22-2016 01:53 AM)Bacchus Wrote:  

Get her to jump through a few hoops, to see if she's just killing time or if there's an attraction there. One I like to do is to move to another part of the bar. If you're standing up, take her someplace to sit down. If you're sitting down, go outside. Don't ask if she wants to sit down though. Just say, "Let's sit down for a second," and lead her to a couch. This does a few things. Most importantly, it separates her from her friends, who want to interfere with your progress. But it also gauges her interest. If she follows you, you know that she wants to keep the interaction going. That means you should move in for a kiss when you have her isolated.

Solid advice Bacchus.

When I gamed abroad, and I knew I had to go for the one-night stand, I made sure to do exactly that. After a few minutes of the group conversation, I'd tell the girl, "It's loud in here, I can't hear you that well, let's step outside, but only for a minute or two," and start moving in that direction. Or, "Come with me to the bar, so that I can get a drink." You can also turn to her friends and add, "I'm going outside with Julia, I'll bring her back in a minute or two."

If after a few minutes of conversation, she won't sit down with you somewhere else, or she won't come outside, she probably won't go home with you that night. Politely exit the set with a smile, "It was nice meeting you girls. Enjoy your night." Walk and open the next set you can see, because the girls will probably still be watching you. If they see you are a social guy, it demonstrates value to them, and you can always re-open the first girl again later. I wish I could think of a great re-opener. Nothing is coming to me. Maybe someone reading this thread can contribute an idea for our newbie friend here.

From just reading your post, I sense you are a lower energy guy, who can be quickly outgamed by loud, bro-y frat guys. Roosh's lines in Bang are slightly sarcastic and slightly funny, which works if you are in a nice bar and you're wearing a blazer and you can say something like, "I hate it how everyone in this bar is concerned about looks and appearances....so what kind of car do you drive?" In a college bar, this stuff falls kind of flat. Roosh's lines are better than being a wallflower and failing to approach any girls, but in my opinion, they will not lead to pussy.

Try a few things:

1. Speak really loud, like louder than you think is comfortable. You have to project your voice at a noisy bar to stand out. Try speaking louder the next time you go out in at least three sets, just for practice.
2. Physical presence. Stand with your legs a little wider than your shoulders. Keep your neck pulled back so you aren't craning yourself towards her. If you want to put your hands somewhere, rest your thumbs in your pocket and have your fingers (led by your index fingers) point towards your package. It's a more dominant stance.
3. Facial expressions. Smile, practice smiling in front of a mirror. I'm going to send you a PM with specific advice on how to practice this right now.
4. Tease her. I'm really fucking bad at this. But it works at night game, especially in a bro-y environment. I'm not sure how to do this well.

Finally, if you know anyone, I mean anyone, who has some modicum of game, latch onto him and follow him for at least three or four sets. Tell him you'll buy him brunch or coffee the next day in exchange. While you are following him, really pay attention to how he acts and the things he says. Take notes on your phone if that's your style. Watch him, and watch the girl. See if she laughs at what he says or does. Do this, with the same guy, the following weekend. You will learn best by osmosis. It's something I never really got the opportunity to do in night game, and it made night game really, really frustrating for a long time. Don't make the same mistake I did.

Great post esp on that list of things. Can we have that smile on the thread? One of the challenges I face is the amount of smile to give when talking to girls without coming across as needy or creepy.

One question I would like to ask is if, in your experience, in such a bar environment, is it good to use the 'lets get a drink' line to isolate her?

Also, wouldnt the second set of girls you approach have already seen you working with the first one and potentially label you as 'the guy' even before you approach them?

Quote: (01-26-2016 08:50 AM)Hazaer Wrote:  

One question I would like to ask is if, in your experience, in such a bar environment, is it good to use the 'lets get a drink' line to isolate her?

No. If she's indifferent, she'll just take the drink and run back to her friends.

Isolation is only valuable if she's interested. Getting one-on-one with some girl who's already bored with you is a waste of time for both of you.

That's why you don't want to provide any incentive to get her isolated other than your presence. You want her to choose to follow you over hanging around her clique. You want her to submit to your frame.

And if she's not down, she did you a favor. She just saved you 30-60 minutes, so you can find another girl who is down. Because if she's not down to take a break with you, she won't be down to leave with you (and spread her legs).

Which brings me back to another point about bars. You don't want to be running around, chasing girls throughout the entire venue, going from room to room without pausing. That creates a negative impression of you. You want to move through it slow and smooth.

How this works is you're posted up near the bar. A spot where you have a good view of all traffic. Look for eye contact, but don't expect it. Find an available target and approach. An easy approach is the closest girl to you.

She's with it, or she isn't. If not, you go to another spot in the bar where you can post up. Some bars have water coolers in the back, for example. Take stock of the room, have a few sips of your drink, and scan for eyes again. Approach again. If it doesn't work out, go back and post up by the bar. Don't approach the first girl. Find someone else.

And you do that a couple times, and either you have found something for the night or you find another venue.

Thank you guys for all the advice, i will for sure take note and apply those when i go out again. I am committed to tackling this part of my life.

Social Profile.

Friends.
I have all different types of friends here. I have motorcycle buddies that i only really chill with when i ride and the occasional hangout. I have my neighbors and roomates whom i am really close with. None of which are really good with gaming girls. Although i can not speak for my friend garret because he is usually at his frat so i dont hear much. Two of the neighbors squad are in frats one of which is an official school fraternity. I find the higher class sorority girls tend to just stick with alot of the higher class frats. Anyways, I also have some friends that i usually go to the bars with. Pretty much when we chill it's us partying or hitting the bars. Those friends are the ones that have the most game out of anyone i know here. One guy specifically with whom i have been chilling with and shadowing to figure out what he does. But i consider him one of my very good friends. We have been speaking on the subject of gaming girls as well because thats pretty much what he is all about. Girls, partying and going to school. I havent seen him meet as much girls at the bar as i have seen alot of girls come up to him yelling his name from previous encounters. I also have a bunch of other friends that i go to school with party with and see at the bars or occasional events. I also have a friend in another un affiliated frat. I party at their house alot which has presented some good bangs.

Social Level and Humor
I have a very sarcastic witty when comfortable humor. I need to make my humor more sexually suggesting, i have been working on it. It mostly comes out when i am fucked up or just having a good day, got enough sleep, took some phenibut etc. I guess that is the inner game you are speaking of. I'm fairly good at talking to people. My job is to talk with people and make them feel comfortable and create enough connections and good feelings to entice a return visit. When it comes to super hot girls i freeze up sometimes. I can talk to them fine but presenting the dominant "I am an attractive male" vibe. I'm not completely horrible with women, I have a decent track record. I pull more girls then my room mates for sure but they are mostly not the 21-24 10's that i want. I definitely struggle being the Loud alpha male in a place where there are so many alpha males. Like i said, it's very overwhelming. I did much better before i got a girlfriend for 2 years whom killed my game. I do much better in a party setting where i can move and actually talk to people i know but even then i often lack the prowless to just be the man and take the girl. I smile a lot but sometimes its hard for me when i'm in a zone that i'm not the most comfortable with (The loud packed bar). As far as smiling goes, I smirk a lot. I caught eyes with a couple girls last night and did nothing like a little bitch. Kicked myself in the ass for that one and tried with some other girls but didn't work. Despite me noticing alot of chicks looking at me as i walked by. Later that night i talked to another girl outside the bar went alright until i realized she was too faded, so i called her friends to pick her up. Went home and gamed a friends roomate went alright till she fell asleep on the couch spooning me.

Talking To Strangers.

Like i said previously, my job is to talk to strangers (mostly middle aged women) but there is a fairly diverse crowd as far as age goes. This is a forced setting though so its pretty easy to just do your job and interact with people. I think this job is helping with my game as well as my game attempt is helping my job. Going out in the day for the prime reason of talking to strangers is what i feel, is the only answer. That's why i have been trying to find a good wingman to go to campus/bars/parties night game / day game to talk to girls. Because when my room mate friends go out to parties we talk to girls and people but they do not result in as much lays for me as i want. Usually none for them. So i feel like some accountability would be nice since getting rejected by a bunch of hot chicks at your college is not the most uplifting morally supporting thing. I was actively approaching girls and strangers back before i had a gf. I was doing this program called Simple 30 with a couple friends. That helped alot but it took keeping each other accountable to do it.

Gym
I havent lifted in a while it is spiratic thing with my roomate but i have gone for the past week and am trying to get back in a routine. Its not easy being an ectomorph on a college student budget. Not to mention the amount i have been drinking and smokingq here which obviously nothing to further my muscle recovery. I used to be 185 before a car accident went down to 150 got it back to 175 then got sick lost it again now i am currently 175 again with a height of 6 foot 3. Its been a struggle keeping the weight on.

Fashion
I honestly don't know much about fashion. I usually wear a button up or a long sleeve shirt under my leather jacket with a gentleman's cut and jeans or khakis. I try to go back in fourth between backwards hats beanies and no headwear. I honestly couldn't tell you anymore on the subject haha.

I appreciate your willingness to look into the inner workings and help me out in my goals.

guys want to help me out?

Quote: (01-29-2016 01:42 PM)Jtguthrie12 Wrote:  

guys want to help me out?

Do you repeatedly text girls in the same fashion that you repeatedly post?

Quote: (01-27-2016 12:40 AM)Bacchus Wrote:  

Quote: (01-26-2016 08:50 AM)Hazaer Wrote:  

One question I would like to ask is if, in your experience, in such a bar environment, is it good to use the 'lets get a drink' line to isolate her?

No. If she's indifferent, she'll just take the drink and run back to her friends.

Isolation is only valuable if she's interested. Getting one-on-one with some girl who's already bored with you is a waste of time for both of you.

That's why you don't want to provide any incentive to get her isolated other than your presence. You want her to choose to follow you over hanging around her clique. You want her to submit to your frame.

And if she's not down, she did you a favor. She just saved you 30-60 minutes, so you can find another girl who is down. Because if she's not down to take a break with you, she won't be down to leave with you (and spread her legs).

Which brings me back to another point about bars. You don't want to be running around, chasing girls throughout the entire venue, going from room to room without pausing. That creates a negative impression of you. You want to move through it slow and smooth.

How this works is you're posted up near the bar. A spot where you have a good view of all traffic. Look for eye contact, but don't expect it. Find an available target and approach. An easy approach is the closest girl to you.

She's with it, or she isn't. If not, you go to another spot in the bar where you can post up. Some bars have water coolers in the back, for example. Take stock of the room, have a few sips of your drink, and scan for eyes again. Approach again. If it doesn't work out, go back and post up by the bar. Don't approach the first girl. Find someone else.

And you do that a couple times, and either you have found something for the night or you find another venue.

Good points. The thing is girls are usually crowding around the bars with their friends when ordering drinks. In this case, should I just approach the girl I am interested in or should I try to engage the whole group, deal with the mother hen etc. before isolating her?

Its good that you re-iterated the point about not buying a girl drinks. But another case could be, say I chatted up a girl at the bar, got her for a dance, feel some connection going, then what happens? Is it better then, we get drinks or should I get her out of the place for a venue change which could be her/my place or another pub/club?

What do you think?

Nope. Just when I am asked to make a large social profile and don't receive a response when I do.