[mikeraw]

I'm texting a girl I got a number from on Friday. I told her that I went to a particular bar after we met. She told me she's never been.

I said:

well then that's where we'll meet when you accept a date from me! ?

And she said:

when? How about *if*


What's a good retort?

[samsamsam]

I'd just go silent. She sounds like a bit of a bitch. She is acting like she is better than you. So you need to show her she isn't. By not begging and letting it sit for a while, maybe you can restart later.

Also, you seemed a bit eager in your text to her.

[mikeraw]

she's kinda sweet. this is the first time I've contacted her since Friday and she's being very receptive. any funny rebuke?

[captain_shane]

I usually just ignore that garbage and keep rolling with the flow. Don't fall into the trap of trying to convince her to go out with you.

[Il Bersagliere]

(06-30-2015 04:11 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

I'd just go silent. She sounds like a bit of a bitch. She is acting like she is better than you. So you need to show her she isn't. By not begging and letting it sit for a while, maybe you can restart later.

Also, you seemed a bit eager in your text to her.

Right. When you ask for a date or to "hang out" it needs to be direct and certain. Also, stop using the word "date." There is a time and place to be clever.

[samsamsam]

(06-30-2015 04:13 PM)mikeraw Wrote:  

she's kinda sweet. this is the first time I've contacted her since Friday and she's being very receptive. any funny rebuke?

I don't see the sweetness or how she is being receptive. If I could think of something I'd let you know but can't think of anything.

If she was sweet and receptive, she would have said what time and what should I wear.

Edit: You could say, I'll be there at 8pm, or whatever and just go silent. I think someone once said keep texts to a minimum, use them to set dates and times, etc. But not to banter, etc. I forgot what has been mentioned about being on time or late. If you are early just talk to other women. She may not show up. If she doesn't, then don't text her. If she doesn't confirm on Friday at 8, then the odds are slim.

I just can't think of anything that would be slick on text. There are some things but it would need a visual cue from you also, or voice inflection. Text and emails generally don't do a great job of conveying that stuff.

[OregonToSoCal]

I would just ignore her reply and go for the date as if she agreed. "Let's check it out. Does x or y day work better". If she gives you a hard time or doesn't reply go silent on her.

[samsamsam]

Not to be a dick OP, but you have been here for over two years and have not given a single like. I am not saying I need any, I don't think what I wrote deserves a like.

47 posts and 10 threads started. So basically, you come here to get help and then bolt. Not trying to be a dick, really. Just observations.

If just find it interesting.

[CactusCat589]

Your first text looks pretty bad to me. Don't use "date", never use "?!" in your texts. Why did you send that instead of giving her directions to the bar she's never been to?

[mikeraw]

that question mark is from an emoji

[mikeraw]

samsamsam,

I'm a student first and foremost. I can't presume to be a teacher of the Crimson arts. I come for advice, yes it may be selfish, but I do it with all humility. I mostly come here when I'm down in the dumps or when my game starts fading and I start slipping back into betaness.

right now it's an interesting time because i dumped my nice GF a couple of months ago and as luck would have it, I'm striking out with the HB8s I used to cheat on her with. it's like they don't like me when I don't have a GF, jajaja!

so now that I'm juggling new girls, I need an extra boost of morale, not guilt trips. but I do apologize for not taking on a more active on this forum.

and I didn't know you could like comments and replies.

[CH-Toronto]

(06-30-2015 04:21 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

Not to be a dick OP, but you have been here for over two years and have not given a single like. I am not saying I need any, I don't think what I wrote deserves a like.

47 posts and 10 threads started. So basically, you come here to get help and then bolt. Not trying to be a dick, really. Just observations.

If just find it interesting.

It seems he posts a lot from his phone - give the guy a break.

As for the girl - she seems down 100%.

[AntiTrace]

(06-30-2015 04:30 PM)mikeraw Wrote:  

I'm striking out with the HB8s I used to cheat on her with. it's like they don't like me when I don't have a GF, jajaja!

My guess is because when you have a GF you are covering your tracks and thus are less eager. You don't respond immediately to texts, or completely ignore texts when your GF is around.

When you are single, you become more eager as you don't have any tracks to cover and you have much more time.

[eradicator]

(06-30-2015 08:47 PM)AntiTrace Wrote:  

(06-30-2015 04:30 PM)mikeraw Wrote:  

I'm striking out with the HB8s I used to cheat on her with. it's like they don't like me when I don't have a GF, jajaja!

My guess is because when you have a GF you are covering your tracks and thus are less eager. You don't respond immediately to texts, or completely ignore texts when your GF is around.

When you are single, you become more eager as you don't have any tracks to cover and you have much more time.

There is definitely something to this. Rather than send her a text when she texts you right away and you want to talk to her, just call her. She is obviously by her phone while sending you a text.

[Feo]

(06-30-2015 04:11 PM)samsamsam Wrote:  

I'd just go silent. She sounds like a bit of a bitch. She is acting like she is better than you. So you need to show her she isn't. By not begging and letting it sit for a while, maybe you can restart later.

Also, you seemed a bit eager in your text to her.

I'm gonna disagree..she's not being a bitch. It's called flirting dude. Think about it, she replied to you. If she weren't slightly interested she would just not reply. Tease her a bit and get some tension going. Simple

This belongs in the newbie thread

[General Stalin]

(06-30-2015 04:02 PM)mikeraw Wrote:  

I said:

well then that's where we'll meet when you accept a date from me! ?

And she said:

when? How about *if*

Then you say: Lol Thursday night 8 oclock

Ignore the shit test. Always try and deflect/evade the shit. Get to what YOU want to talk about and have her answer to. If she is being difficult every step of the way then she is absolutely not worth fucking with - she either isn't wet enough for you or she is just an entitled unsociable cunt. If it;s the former - as has been preached on here many times before - you won't be texting your way into her pants.

[Jazzman92]

I'd probably just say something obscure like "Opportunities never last". IDK if thats the best thing to say though I'm still a beginner.

[cascadecombo]

I would say something like.

"aww, you think you have a choice"

[TheMan]

Just laugh it off and keep going.
(Like Stalin's example above)

[Guitarman]

Don't "ask her ""TO ACCEPT"" a date" and put a question mark after that. Just tell her where to meet or tell her you're going to pick her up for a night out, when you're ready.

Be the prize and not the pursuer. Asking her "to accept" says her value is higher than yours and you are chasing her, hence she said "if".

Don't give her a chance to say ".if"

I would go silent for a while then tell her she is going out for a drink with you.

[mikeraw]

OK, so I replied something kind of lame ("ya, you'll enjoy it more since I'll be there") and did what OregonToSoCal recommended, basically telling her "let's check it out. I'll be there at 7:30 tomorrow". She said she had plans and disnt counteroffer but I said: "well, it'd be cool to meet a fellow art lover. let me know if Thursday at 8:00 works". She said that it did and we have tentative plans.

The answer I was looking for, by the way, was something along the lines of what General Stalin said. It's just surprising how the mind goes blank sometimes.

And I didn't want to argue with the negative comments and accusations of being a newb and all because I was at the gym while this was going on, but I could sense she was in a flirty mood. I just didn't have time to explain this and give examples and all.

Thanks to all, though. I know it's not 100% done so I'll post an update tomorrow for those who care. Yes, I have back up plans.

[Russian Man]

The initial text was wrong. One must never make it seem like there is an "if". You are so high-value that the yes is utterly and completely assumed. You ask her out, if she says no, delete the number, abundance mentality.

If she is hitting you with this bullshit over text, you didn't do the set right, the vibe after a number-close should be an enthusiastic yes, the maybe girls are converted in person, and the shit-tests are dealt with in person. They shouldn't happen through text if the set was properly managed.

[mikeraw]

So, an update for anyone that may care:

I met up with the girl and lo and behold the place was packed, but a Russian I had taken there a few days before was there with a friend. I said hi and she invited me to sit with them while my "friend" showed up. The Russian didn't know my friend was a girl so I figured good social proof on both directions.

When the girl showed up I introduced everyone and since the place was packed we walked to another bar and that's when our date started.

After a like 20 mins, her cute cousin and her BF showed up and since that place was also packed I invited them to join us on our date for a drink. I hit it off with her cousin and the guy was pretty cool, too. Both of them had just graduated LSU and it was just an easy conversation. Then my date and I crossed the street for another drink and I kissed closed. The cousin and BF didn't show up there and then we went back to the original bar because we figured it wasn't going to be full anymore and the Russian wasn't there anymore. Then I took my girl to her placed and I asked for a glass of water. Then while I was at her apartment we started making out hardcore and I finger banged her. She didn't want to put out so I went home.

We met up the next day and more making out and I got a BJS but she didn't want to put out.

We met up a couple more times then she travelled to NYC and got back on Sunday evening (I'm writing this on a Tuesday). On Sunday I banged some chick is met a week prior and I banged her again on Monday, without calling the original girl at all. Then, today Tuesday, we met up and I was suited up because I went to an opera party and being suited up always scores big points. So after a couple of drinks I told her that it was bedtime and took her straight to my place where we finally banged.

All in all, it was a good night. I went three times and she even asked if I would ever call her again (she's 24, I'm 34, so the age thing is golden if you're in decent shape).

Anyways, that's what happened.

Turns out that sh*t test girl comes from money and I can't expect to provide her with the things she's used to (I saw pics of her on a private plane and a certain college football field is named after her dad, who's still alive, so that honor was definitely owed to $$$).

I hope to keep banging her for as long as possible but won't consider her for an LTR.

That's all that happened. I estimate I spent about $160 before first bang. More than I'm used to, but she knew some awesome moves so yeah.

[Gustavus Adolphus]

(07-15-2015 12:59 AM)mikeraw Wrote:  

So, an update for anyone that may care:

I met up with the girl and lo and behold the place was packed, but a Russian I had taken there a few days before was there with a friend. I said hi and she invited me to sit with them while my "friend" showed up. The Russian didn't know my friend was a girl so I figured good social proof on both directions.

When the girl showed up I introduced everyone and since the place was packed we walked to another bar and that's when our date started.

After a like 20 mins, her cute cousin and her BF showed up and since that place was also packed I invited them to join us on our date for a drink. I hit it off with her cousin and the guy was pretty cool, too. Both of them had just graduated LSU and it was just an easy conversation. Then my date and I crossed the street for another drink and I kissed closed. The cousin and BF didn't show up there and then we went back to the original bar because we figured it wasn't going to be full anymore and the Russian wasn't there anymore. Then I took my girl to her placed and I asked for a glass of water. Then while I was at her apartment we started making out hardcore and I finger banged her. She didn't want to put out so I went home.

We met up the next day and more making out and I got a BJS but she didn't want to put out.

We met up a couple more times then she travelled to NYC and got back on Sunday evening (I'm writing this on a Tuesday). On Sunday I banged some chick is met a week prior and I banged her again on Monday, without calling the original girl at all. Then, today Tuesday, we met up and I was suited up because I went to an opera party and being suited up always scores big points. So after a couple of drinks I told her that it was bedtime and took her straight to my place where we finally banged.

All in all, it was a good night. I went three times and she even asked if I would ever call her again (she's 24, I'm 34, so the age thing is golden if you're in decent shape).

Anyways, that's what happened.

Turns out that sh*t test girl comes from money and I can't expect to provide her with the things she's used to (I saw pics of her on a private plane and a certain college football field is named after her dad, who's still alive, so that honor was definitely owed to $$$).

I hope to keep banging her for as long as possible but won't consider her for an LTR.

That's all that happened. I estimate I spent about $160 before first bang. More than I'm used to, but she knew some awesome moves so yeah.

Way to soldier through a disappointing first encounter finger bang. For future reference, it is not necessary (in my opinion) to discuss the financial investment in your bang. It was either worth it, or it wasn't. Simple enough for most of us; with a variety of economic backgrounds, a dollar figure doesn't help much. Just a thought- take it or leave it...

OFF TOPIC:

I can tell you tried, but your writing needs attention. Read it to yourself, out loud, and see if it makes sense. It is very easy to visualize the mistakes to sound correct. I am not trying to be an asshole or accuse you of anything. My brother has dyslexia and struggles with anything written, but is very eloquent in his speech. He can negotiate a $5M deal, but can't be sure if "their" is spelled right. It has nothing to do with intelligence.

[Rawmeo]

Awesome one. The initial was a shit test IMO, not a bitchy attitude. A bitchy response would have been "I'll let you know when I have time" or something like that.