[Private Man]

At 52 years old and my sexual bucket list filled, I simply plead the 5th.

So, how 'bout those Braves?

[Suits]

(04-09-2014 11:26 AM)Troll King Wrote:  

The craziest public sex I have had was probably...getting a blowjob from an exgf standing at the counter of Dominos while talking to the hot worker taking my pizza order.

Hmmmm.....

[Ivanis]

Gotta bump this, purely out of respect for the balls on some of the posters! Good work men!

[XPQ22]

You can read one of mine on the "SA" thread in the private lounge.

thread-56031...pid1361019

This is what I was feeling internally for most of that afternoon:

[DJ-Matt]

(04-07-2014 01:47 AM)spalex Wrote:  

I once fucked a girl on the Jewish Holocaust memorial in Berlin.

... It sounds bad if you haven't actually seen the memorial.

If you are still disgusted, just google image search it, you'll understand.

From Kona in the other thread

[El Padrone]

Met a muslim chick, convinced her I was with the Secret Service, and the rest is history......

[Ivanis]

(09-29-2016 09:06 AM)XPQ22 Wrote:  

You can read one of mine on the "SA" thread in the private lounge.

thread-56031...pid1361019

This is what I was feeling internally for most of that afternoon:

Seems as though I can't access the thread...

[XPQ22]

(09-29-2016 07:03 PM)Ivanis Wrote:  

Seems as though I can't access the thread...

Yeah, the Private Lounge is locked for users with fewer than 350 posts IIRC.

Long story short, I met up with a mid-20s online chick from the sticks with a bunch of crazy tattoos who was working at a high-rise hotel in the city as a pro-dominatrix, making $300 an hour having lawyers and investment bankers do her dishes, lick her boots, and get the shit whipped out of them, she had a drawer full of gear including a Tazer dildo, didn't get the bang but I jerked off on her butt.

So that was an interesting way to spend a couple hours on a lazy weekday afternoon. Only investment IIRC was a whiskey on the rocks at the hotel bar. And the parking garage, which wasn't that bad because the Dunkin' Donuts in the lobby validated my ticket.

[dain_bramage]

So I was 19 years old and I worked in a grocery store in my town. There was a girl that had an epic ass that I liked and decent titties. A bit of a man chin though unfortunetatly.

I walked her home a couple times, talked with her lots, and started pushing about the third time I hung out with her. We were down in the depths of town and we were bored. She said she wanted to go to the city and see some friends of hers apparently. We went most of the way downtwon and then derped around for about an hour or so before walking in what she said was the direction of her friend's place who she knew from a private school she went to. After a bit of walking she flat out asked if I wanted to have sex with her. I said yes of course and we walked down to the beach. There was a hostel in the area that she suggested we go to but I thought that there wasn't much of a chance of us being alone there.

So we walked down to where a beach bathroom change room place was. Of course it was locked up as it was about 1 AM. We were both keen on screwing so I found an area with a couple of trees and a bush area and we fucked. It was my first time. Out on a beach in Vancouver in the middle of the winter just shagging a girl.

That was not the first time I did a girl in a weird spot.

We went into a park and had sex on a observation deck

Then later on we had sex near a slough with a drainage thing near our workplace.

Another girl I boned in a wooded area near her house after about 4 or 5 hours of spending time with her in person for the first time.

I've done some things and some stuff.

Neither of these two girls/women I ever really had to spend money on.

[AboveAverageJoe]

I pulled this pure Spaniard-looking Cubana from the strip club. She had limited English but I had acheived a reasonable amount of Spanish at that time and I got her home with me after the club. She's coming to the house to fuck we get straight to fucking. I'm expecting "ay, Papi." and shit and this chick is growling and making animal noises. Differrent cat sounds one sounded like a mountain lion or linx and another sounded like a snarling tiger. And she was good, they sounded like real animals. It is not turning me on-its freaking me out now. I figure I turn her over and try to get her face more into a pillow to shut her up and I continue fucking from behind. While doing her doggy, face-down she reaches back with her right hand and rips off the condom in one fast motion. It happens so fast I was already in and out a couple times before I could even react to what happened. At that point I figure whatever, this bitch is a psycho and I am already knee deep in the pussy anyway. I just kept going until I busted a giant load in her. We went to sleep. Next morning, I woke up, made us coffee we talked a bit and I drove her home. I played it cool and waited until just when she was getting out of the car and said "That was cool we should hangout again sometime you wan't my number?" and She just said no and walked to her apartment. Obviously if I wanted to I could have found her at the strip club, but I never saw her again.

The cold way she did that had me thinking she exposed me to something, otherwise why expertly yank off the condom mid-thrust without some purpose? Did she infect me with HIV or something and It freaked me out for a few days. I just charged it to the game. And those animal sounds, they were indescribable in their ferocity and likeness. She made the sounds of wild animals when I fucked her and snatched off the condom midthrust. Crazy. This woman was an easy 8 with a flawless body and beautiful face, stone cold loca.

I am pretty sure that is my craziest sex story but I know I have some others.

[papaiela]

This might be a bit weird for you guys but I ass fucked my older cousin several times at the age of 15. She was sweet and sixteen and her ass was so clean it was unbelievable. Every time I eat a cup cake I think of her.

Every time I'd go to my grandma I'd ass fuck her. One day she even surprised me with a little bush in a metro ticket kind of form and I ate her out. Good old times. She has a very erotic kind of vibe.

I know it's a bit weird but there aren't several options where I come from, you either take your cousin's or the camel's ass.

For me it was my older cousin and I am glad I did it. Today she is in a very serious relationship and I am in el game. I might fuck her another time if I have the chance to do it.

I have to admit that she's ugly but I am sure she would do everything I ask, add to that the fact that she's rich. If I fail career wise I will game her and try to marry her because she's my little cup cake.

As a final remark, I don't understand guys who have hot cousins and don't fuck them.

[realologist]

(10-01-2016 03:11 PM)papaiela Wrote:  

This might be a bit weird for you guys but I ass fucked my older cousin several times at the age of 15. She was sweet and sixteen and her ass was so clean it was unbelievable. Every time I eat a cup cake I think of her.

Every time I'd go to my grandma I'd ass fuck her. One day she even surprised me with a little bush in a metro ticket kind of form and I ate her out. Good old times. She has a very erotic kind of vibe.

I know it's a bit weird but there aren't several options where I come from, you either take your cousin's or the camel's ass.

For me it was my older cousin and I am glad I did it. Today she is in a very serious relationship and I am in el game. I might fuck her another time if I have the chance to do it.

I have to admit that she's ugly but I am sure she would do everything I ask, add to that the fact that she's rich. If I fail career wise I will game her and try to marry her because she's my little cup cake.

As a final remark, I don't understand guys who have hot cousins and don't fuck them.

[debeguiled]

realologist is right of course, and yet I had to give papaiela a like just for pure weirdness's sake.

[HonantheBarbarian]

The fuck did I just read?

[AboveAverageJoe]

I also have a story about a chick passing out with my dick in her ass. I was quite insulted. I might tell that one later.

[papaiela]

Truth is that I am not trolling.

It might be weird from a Western standpoint but it’s not wrong where I come from I’d happily fuck her again. In fact, I know a lot of people married to there cousin. It's cultural.

I wouldn’t have kids with her though. There is a high chance of them being ugly and a small chance of them being retarded.

If you take a step back and think about it, I helped her become better at blowjob and at sex in general. Plus, she probably didn't have a constipation since the age of 16. If everybody took his cousin job as seriously as I did there wouldn’t be girls giving bad blowjob out there or not knowing how to fuck.

Please be open

[debeguiled]

(10-01-2016 05:29 PM)papaiela Wrote:  

If you take a step back and think about it, I helped her become better at blowjob and at sex in general. Plus, she probably didn't have a constipation since the age of 16. If everybody took his cousin job as seriously as I did there wouldn’t be girls giving bad blowjob out there or not knowing how to fuck.

Please be open

I am open to your incest blow job anal tutorial constipation remedies. Who wouldn't be?

[Yatagan]

(10-01-2016 03:11 PM)papaiela Wrote:  

This might be a bit weird for you guys but I ass fucked my older cousin several times at the age of 15. She was sweet and sixteen and her ass was so clean it was unbelievable. Every time I eat a cup cake I think of her.

Every time I'd go to my grandma I'd ass fuck her. One day she even surprised me with a little bush in a metro ticket kind of form and I ate her out. Good old times. She has a very erotic kind of vibe.

I know it's a bit weird but there aren't several options where I come from, you either take your cousin's or the camel's ass.

For me it was my older cousin and I am glad I did it. Today she is in a very serious relationship and I am in el game. I might fuck her another time if I have the chance to do it.

I have to admit that she's ugly but I am sure she would do everything I ask, add to that the fact that she's rich. If I fail career wise I will game her and try to marry her because she's my little cup cake.

As a final remark, I don't understand guys who have hot cousins and don't fuck them.

What about guys with hot sisters that don't fuck them?

[realologist]

[Slim Shady]

First cousin or second cousin?

I actually believe your story, except for the camel part. That is

My first cousin is actually married to my second cousin (also her second cousin through the same relation).

[papaiela]

Quote:

What about guys with hot sisters that don't fuck them? tard

It's a cousin's job.

Joking aside, I see that it shocked several people in here which is normal since it's "anormal" in the west.

As I said in my previous post, it's a cultural difference.

More information on this:

Quote:

Marriages and sexual relationships between first cousins are stigmatized as incest in some cultures, but tolerated in much of the world.

Quote:

First- and second-cousin marriages are rare, accounting for less than 1% of marriages in Western Europe, North America and Oceania, while reaching 9% in South America, East Asia and South Europe and about 50% in regions of the Middle East, North Africa and South Asia.

I'm not going to lie, it was my first cousin.

[Belize King]

We go to a club. I met my boy's girlfriends friend and we kick it off. We go back to our place and the friend was down. I had to get a condom. I chose to take my Ducati. The gas station was maybe a mile down the way. I dropped my bike and wasn't wearing a helmet. Slammed into the median which thankfully was grassed. Forehead bleeding and lip busted, picked up my bike and commenced to get the condom.

Got back and smashed the chick. She was faded and chewed on my busted lip. Painfully but I let her do it.

Woke up the next morning in too much pain to go to class. Ended up with a broken arm. She ended up being apart of my rotation.

I smashed her in her ass too. Crazy.

[Ivanis]

(10-01-2016 08:43 PM)papaiela Wrote:  

Quote:

What about guys with hot sisters that don't fuck them? tard

It's a cousin's job.

Joking aside, I see that it shocked several people in here which is normal since it's "anormal" in the west.

As I said in my previous post, it's a cultural difference.

More information on this:

Quote:

Marriages and sexual relationships between first cousins are stigmatized as incest in some cultures, but tolerated in much of the world.

Quote:

First- and second-cousin marriages are rare, accounting for less than 1% of marriages in Western Europe, North America and Oceania, while reaching 9% in South America, East Asia and South Europe and about 50% in regions of the Middle East, North Africa and South Asia.

I'm not going to lie, it was my first cousin.

Teaching chicks how to fuck in their teens? Seems like your paying it forward. I approve!

[AboveAverageJoe]

Once, I was getting head at a chick's house that I had picked up at a nightclub we were playing at. When she proceeded to blow me it felt like a rough handjob combined with her chewing on my dick like a sasquatch chewing on some Jack Links beef jerky. I told her to chill out, and be gentler, and tried to talk her through it but she kept being unnecessarily rough with my cock. I realized I shouldn't have came home with this broad and I sensed some crazy in her. Since the head wasn't working I told her I was gonna grab some condoms from my car, I think shew knew I was gonna bail because she didn't wan't me to leave. Told her I take safe sex really seriously, ran out and jumped in my car and drove home. I figured if the head was that crazy the pussy would be just as bad. I passed and was glad about it. All pussy ain't good pussy.

[RBerkley]

(10-01-2016 03:11 PM)papaiela Wrote:  

This might be a bit weird for you guys but I ass fucked my older cousin several times at the age of 15. She was sweet and sixteen and her ass was so clean it was unbelievable. Every time I eat a cup cake I think of her.
.....

As a final remark, I don't understand guys who have hot cousins and don't fuck them.

Your cousin's pooperchute may be as clean & sterile as a surgery room for you not to get a UTI from putting your dick inside it, but ya post gonna put a lotta people into deep shit because certain laws (drafted by bitter old women whose digestive system retained dozens of years of stink farts) could get forum members charged for obscenity crimes.

Next time change the ages to 18 so that Roosh doesn't get anxiety when he fucks a hot 18-year-old Romanian chick in her pussy.

Speaking of white chick's asses, there was this hot I think 19 or 20 year old white or Jewish heritage chick who did 69 style & when I saw her pink asshole, I was in my mind like "What a hole" like that thief from Home Alone movie.

I knew that she wanted me to kiss her asshole, but my medical knowledge made me hesitant because I didn't want to lick her asshole & get worms or gastroenteritis.

But that white chick's asshole was pink like her lips. It was tempting to eat that pink asshole, but I resorted to playing with her smooth white ass like playdough. This chick was 19 or 20, so no worries or fear, though women get jealous that I get a constant supply of legal age worldwide chicks to fuck.