00 Approaches – Nightgame Experiences in the Great White North
01-29-2014, 07:22 PM
I’m making this thread to log my 100 approaches as they happen as I’ve noticed that other members who post their 100 approaches thread often have very long initial posts that deter other people from reading them and as a result don’t seem to provide as much value as they could (both to the OP’s as well as other members/lurkers).
Some background and intro
I live in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada.
I already stated some of this in my introduction post on the intro thread, but in the interests of convenience, I’ll repeat some of it here.
My intro to game was coming across a copy of “The game” around 06/07. Read up on game after that. I’ve been fairly successful with social circle, facebook and daygame since then. To the point where all my friends and family noticed, however, I never really tried my hand at nightgame as I never felt the need to. I’ve been called out to demonstrate my abilities by my friends at bars a couple times over the past year or so and I failed to have many successful approaches let alone closes, so I decided that I wanted to add nightgame to my arsenal as I clearly still have a lot to learn (not that I’m not still learning and evolving in other areas like daygame).
I have almost no approach anxiety because of both past successes with daygame/fbgame/ssgame, as well as becoming a more confident, outgoing person over the last few years.
I’ve found that things like projecting confidence, good posture, and possessing a teasing/flirty personality and sense of humor have integrated themselves into my personality over the years while in other areas such as manner of dress, working out, and speech (slow, clear etc), I’ve failed to progress as much as I could have. My goal is to shore up those and other weaknesses.
I’ll do my best to make my posts both clear and concise, but I have no doubt I’ll sometimes have trouble remembering specific details of the conversation and that I’ll omit certain details without meaning to.
I’ll sometimes list my own thoughts/notes on approaches/nights out, and would like the forum’s input on those if I’m headed in the right direction or might be going down the wrong path in my evolution/thought process.
Any comments, insights, or observations are both welcome and appreciated.
Without further ado, in the words of Bruce Buffer “Here….we…GO!”
Sat, Jan 4, 2014
Venue: The Pint off Whyte
1.Had a friend walking with me. Said “hey” to a two-set that was standing by the bar talking to each other. No response, didn’t hear me. Said “hey” louder, one girl looks at you with wide eyes like you surprised her, doesn’t say anything and goes back to talking to her friend. You move on. Your approach was kind of from a back angle with no eye contact, maybe that’s why. Either way, the whole interaction was pretty funny. Her eyes were as big as saucers when she looked at you.
2.Had a friend walking with me. Said “hey” to a two-set that was standing by some tables. One girl was adjusting something on the other girls head. Approach from behind (45 degree angle from behind, no eye contact) Said “hey” about as loud as second “hey” from first set. Girl looks at you surprised like previous girl, then says hey and goes back to what she was doing.
Then I say “oh, you wanna finish, ok, I’ll wait. (teasing sarcastically)”
She keeps adjusting this thing on her friends head.
Me “what the fuck is that?”
Her “A headpiece.”
Me “A headpiece?”
Her “Yeah. You need to get out more.”
I laugh and walk away as they also move to leave the bar.
3.Solo, Approach a girl sitting at table you were just at before you went out for a smoke. She’s looking at her phone. You go up and hold your hands out to your sides as if in protest but don’t say anything.
Her “what?”
Me “You totally stole my table” with a slight smirk at the end.
Her “what?”
Me “I was sitting here before and I come back and now you’re here”
Her “This is your table?”
Me “Yes, if you flip the table over, you’ll notice I’ve written my name underneath to claim it”
Her “I’m not flipping over the table”
Me “What, you’re not going to go all hulk smash and flip the table?”
Her “ no, I’m just waiting for my boyfriend.”
Me “Oh yeah.”
Her “My name’s Zoey.”
Me “I’m Hunter.”
Her “I have to go to the bathroom.” stands up and walks away.
Notes – I’ll need to either speak louder, but not to the point of shocking them, or find a quieter bar. Maybe make sure they can see me approach (eye contact first)? Don’t drink so much, I was definitely half cut for the final approach. The bar seemed like it had a lot more girls in it vs. guys at around 10-11, after that, it filled up with more people, but more men for sure. There were three two sets on the side of the bar adjacent to me when I was posted up at the bar with my friend. They were lingering getting their drinks, I should have approached, don’t hesitate, approach quicker next time.
Tues Jan 7, 2014
Venue : Bar beside hotel in Calgary
4.Approached 2 set playing pool across the bar from my co-workers and I.
Me “Hi”
Both “Hi”
Me “I couldn’t help but notice your amazing pool skills from across the room.” (sarcastic teasing)
Light laughter from both
Girl 1 “What, you mean bad and really slow?”
Me “Yeah, it’s impressive, maybe you could give me some tips?”
Girl 1 “umm..go slow” followed by a little laugh.
Me “Are you two from Calgary?”
Girl 1 “Yes”
Me “cool, I’m from Edmonton, here for work.”
Girl 1 “that’s cool”.
They seemed bored/unresponsive/quiet (Despite the little laughs) and I kind of felt like I was intruding, so I say “Well maybe I’ll come back later and we can play some doubles or something.” They say “sure”. I didn’t approach again and they left around an hour later.
Notes: They seen you come in, they seen you walk right by them and get some chalk from the pool table next to them as well as a cue. You should have approached sooner. Getting eye contact before saying anything definitely helped with not shocking her/them when you said hello. Mind you, this bar was also empty except for them, and you and your co-workers. The music was also significantly lower. Maybe start conversation threads or go into routines quicker, although, in this instance, more intro rapport felt like it needed to be developed first.
Friday, Jan 17, 2014
Venue: The Druid (Downtown)
5.Approached a group of 3 (2 women, one guy) – Was outside smoking, heard them talking about where they were, they weren’t sure which street they were on. Asked if they were from out of town and made fun of them when they said no. Talked about where they lived before. Asked them how they all know each other. Convo flowed from there. Focused on one chick after about 5 minutes. Guy turned out to be their gay friend. Made jokes about ankle porn, blue eyes and camels since the girl I focused on lived in Bahrain for a time. More jokes and stories followed. Made a false time constraint by saying I had to get back to my buddies inside and number closed the girl I was focusing on (Cynthia) and went back in bar. She asked if I was here alone when I number closed her, I said no, buddies are inside.
6.Was smoking and talking to dude outside that you had an earlier convo with. Made lingering and smirking eye contact with a single girl alone smoking. Said Hey. She said hey. Don’t remember exactly what was said after, but I remember her joking that my shoes were a “dealbreaker” and I definitely made fun of her more because I remember her hitting my chest and telling me to shut up playfully. Went back into the bar with her after finishing smoking. Kissed her in the bar after some kino while joking and feeling her muscle after she said she was a nurse and was strong. Got her #, told her I’d find her later and went to go talk to my buddi. Came back to see her later, kissed her again and asked her if she lived close. She said she did. Was pretty buzzed, so don’t recall any other specific convo, but basically continued running game and ended up going back to her place after her friend picked us up. Fuck close.
Notes: With #6, the fuck close. I was definitely running game on her, but it felt different. It felt too easy, almost like she was the one picking me up. Maybe this is just how running game at night feels as opposed to during the day? Maybe she was just really horny and wanted to fuck me because she found me hot? Thoughts anyone? For reference, I’ve been consistently rated as a 7 or 8 attractiveness level just on looks alone, not including personality, humor etc. I’d give her a 6. Of course it’s not as important as other things, but I would assume attractiveness level means more in nightgame when talking about SNL’s?
Friday, Jan 24, 2014
Venue(s): The Pint off Jasper and The Ranch Roadhouse
7.Don’t know if this counts as an approach, but I’ll put it in anyway because it’d be nice to have some feedback. My friend invited me out to be his wingman for this girl (Lynn) that he met on pof. It was one of Lynn’s friend’s birthday celebration. We met Lynn and her friend Chantal just outside of Central Social Hall where they were just leaving and walked with them to The pint. Made small talk outside the pint, just getting to know each other type stuff and I lightly teased Chantal as well. Inside the pint, I talked to her a bit more, but it was loud and hard to hear each other. About half hour later we all left and drove in two separate cars to the Ranch Roadhouse. After getting in, I continued chatting up Chantal and teasing her while my friend worked on Lynn. At one point, I remember stepping in between Chantal and another girl after Chantal bumped her because the girl had bumped her first, couple pushes each way, then I held them both back. The other girls friends came over and told me I need to control my girl. I told them to move on and have a nice night while keeping Chantal behind me. (the other girls were all 5 9” + and 150lb + and Chantal is around 5 2” and 120. Later, I danced with Chantal and she had no problem with me getting close and touching her body, hands on both hips, around waist, touching hands, faces an inch apart etc. Seemingly no physical resistance while on the dance floor. (I still pretty much just two step, but I’m trying to get better at dancing, I still feel slightly awkward and uncomfortable when I’m dancing). We then went to the VIP section with everyone as it was one of their friend’s (Lena, but I’ll call her blondie from here on out) birthdays. Sat next to Chantal (A little late, but some pertinent info - Chantal is engaged to another guy and she lives in Calgary (300km away), was born in Germany and I’d give her a 8. She was the DD that night and didn’t have a sip of alcohol all night) and continued small talk and teasing, had a hard time starting threads and routines because of the noise level. Another guy on the other side of Chantal started talking to her and after a couple of minutes, she elbowed him in the face because he got too close to her face. We all left the bar and went back to Lynn’s place in Leduc, where Chantal was also staying for the weekend that she was in town. Birthday Girl Blondie (who was, by then, ridiculously annoying drunk) came too. When I got there my buddi and Lynn started playing N64 Mariokart. Due to blondie being on the loveseat with Chantal and Blondie being stupid drunk, I couldn’t sit next to her and had trouble trying to start a conversation that lasted more than a couple exchanges. Blondie then drags Chantal downstairs to talk. There was also no booze at their place. I didn’t get so much as a make out. Neither did my buddi.
8.Approached an older woman (looked mid-late 30’s) who was standing by the dancefloor when I was alone for a bit. Approach was done mainly as an experiment to see if Chantal would get jealous when she came back because I was talking to another woman. I teased her a bit, etc. don’t really remember the convo at all. Chantal didn’t seem to care, but she did look and notice immediately when she got back. I ended the interaction and went back to talk to Chantal maybe two mins or so after she saw you talking to the older chick.
Notes: Escalate more physically when I don’t encounter resistance. Push the interaction as far as it can go. Maybe I should have tried to kiss her on the dancefloor? Or at least grinded her? Also, packing a full bottle of wine and a bottle of alcohol in my car when I go out is probably a good idea. Next time, when trying to make another girl jealous by opening someone else, make sure the second girl is at least as attractive as the girl I’m trying to make jealous. Also, maybe make the interaction last longer as well. I mostly chalk not getting anything with Chantal in #7 up to both logistics and drunk blondie, but I hate to blame external factors. Other than what I listed above, is there anything that you guys can recommend I should have done differently?
Some background and intro
I live in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada.
I already stated some of this in my introduction post on the intro thread, but in the interests of convenience, I’ll repeat some of it here.
My intro to game was coming across a copy of “The game” around 06/07. Read up on game after that. I’ve been fairly successful with social circle, facebook and daygame since then. To the point where all my friends and family noticed, however, I never really tried my hand at nightgame as I never felt the need to. I’ve been called out to demonstrate my abilities by my friends at bars a couple times over the past year or so and I failed to have many successful approaches let alone closes, so I decided that I wanted to add nightgame to my arsenal as I clearly still have a lot to learn (not that I’m not still learning and evolving in other areas like daygame).
I have almost no approach anxiety because of both past successes with daygame/fbgame/ssgame, as well as becoming a more confident, outgoing person over the last few years.
I’ve found that things like projecting confidence, good posture, and possessing a teasing/flirty personality and sense of humor have integrated themselves into my personality over the years while in other areas such as manner of dress, working out, and speech (slow, clear etc), I’ve failed to progress as much as I could have. My goal is to shore up those and other weaknesses.
I’ll do my best to make my posts both clear and concise, but I have no doubt I’ll sometimes have trouble remembering specific details of the conversation and that I’ll omit certain details without meaning to.
I’ll sometimes list my own thoughts/notes on approaches/nights out, and would like the forum’s input on those if I’m headed in the right direction or might be going down the wrong path in my evolution/thought process.
Any comments, insights, or observations are both welcome and appreciated.
Without further ado, in the words of Bruce Buffer “Here….we…GO!”
Sat, Jan 4, 2014
Venue: The Pint off Whyte
1.Had a friend walking with me. Said “hey” to a two-set that was standing by the bar talking to each other. No response, didn’t hear me. Said “hey” louder, one girl looks at you with wide eyes like you surprised her, doesn’t say anything and goes back to talking to her friend. You move on. Your approach was kind of from a back angle with no eye contact, maybe that’s why. Either way, the whole interaction was pretty funny. Her eyes were as big as saucers when she looked at you.
2.Had a friend walking with me. Said “hey” to a two-set that was standing by some tables. One girl was adjusting something on the other girls head. Approach from behind (45 degree angle from behind, no eye contact) Said “hey” about as loud as second “hey” from first set. Girl looks at you surprised like previous girl, then says hey and goes back to what she was doing.
Then I say “oh, you wanna finish, ok, I’ll wait. (teasing sarcastically)”
She keeps adjusting this thing on her friends head.
Me “what the fuck is that?”
Her “A headpiece.”
Me “A headpiece?”
Her “Yeah. You need to get out more.”
I laugh and walk away as they also move to leave the bar.
3.Solo, Approach a girl sitting at table you were just at before you went out for a smoke. She’s looking at her phone. You go up and hold your hands out to your sides as if in protest but don’t say anything.
Her “what?”
Me “You totally stole my table” with a slight smirk at the end.
Her “what?”
Me “I was sitting here before and I come back and now you’re here”
Her “This is your table?”
Me “Yes, if you flip the table over, you’ll notice I’ve written my name underneath to claim it”
Her “I’m not flipping over the table”
Me “What, you’re not going to go all hulk smash and flip the table?”
Her “ no, I’m just waiting for my boyfriend.”
Me “Oh yeah.”
Her “My name’s Zoey.”
Me “I’m Hunter.”
Her “I have to go to the bathroom.” stands up and walks away.
Notes – I’ll need to either speak louder, but not to the point of shocking them, or find a quieter bar. Maybe make sure they can see me approach (eye contact first)? Don’t drink so much, I was definitely half cut for the final approach. The bar seemed like it had a lot more girls in it vs. guys at around 10-11, after that, it filled up with more people, but more men for sure. There were three two sets on the side of the bar adjacent to me when I was posted up at the bar with my friend. They were lingering getting their drinks, I should have approached, don’t hesitate, approach quicker next time.
Tues Jan 7, 2014
Venue : Bar beside hotel in Calgary
4.Approached 2 set playing pool across the bar from my co-workers and I.
Me “Hi”
Both “Hi”
Me “I couldn’t help but notice your amazing pool skills from across the room.” (sarcastic teasing)
Light laughter from both
Girl 1 “What, you mean bad and really slow?”
Me “Yeah, it’s impressive, maybe you could give me some tips?”
Girl 1 “umm..go slow” followed by a little laugh.
Me “Are you two from Calgary?”
Girl 1 “Yes”
Me “cool, I’m from Edmonton, here for work.”
Girl 1 “that’s cool”.
They seemed bored/unresponsive/quiet (Despite the little laughs) and I kind of felt like I was intruding, so I say “Well maybe I’ll come back later and we can play some doubles or something.” They say “sure”. I didn’t approach again and they left around an hour later.
Notes: They seen you come in, they seen you walk right by them and get some chalk from the pool table next to them as well as a cue. You should have approached sooner. Getting eye contact before saying anything definitely helped with not shocking her/them when you said hello. Mind you, this bar was also empty except for them, and you and your co-workers. The music was also significantly lower. Maybe start conversation threads or go into routines quicker, although, in this instance, more intro rapport felt like it needed to be developed first.
Friday, Jan 17, 2014
Venue: The Druid (Downtown)
5.Approached a group of 3 (2 women, one guy) – Was outside smoking, heard them talking about where they were, they weren’t sure which street they were on. Asked if they were from out of town and made fun of them when they said no. Talked about where they lived before. Asked them how they all know each other. Convo flowed from there. Focused on one chick after about 5 minutes. Guy turned out to be their gay friend. Made jokes about ankle porn, blue eyes and camels since the girl I focused on lived in Bahrain for a time. More jokes and stories followed. Made a false time constraint by saying I had to get back to my buddies inside and number closed the girl I was focusing on (Cynthia) and went back in bar. She asked if I was here alone when I number closed her, I said no, buddies are inside.
6.Was smoking and talking to dude outside that you had an earlier convo with. Made lingering and smirking eye contact with a single girl alone smoking. Said Hey. She said hey. Don’t remember exactly what was said after, but I remember her joking that my shoes were a “dealbreaker” and I definitely made fun of her more because I remember her hitting my chest and telling me to shut up playfully. Went back into the bar with her after finishing smoking. Kissed her in the bar after some kino while joking and feeling her muscle after she said she was a nurse and was strong. Got her #, told her I’d find her later and went to go talk to my buddi. Came back to see her later, kissed her again and asked her if she lived close. She said she did. Was pretty buzzed, so don’t recall any other specific convo, but basically continued running game and ended up going back to her place after her friend picked us up. Fuck close.
Notes: With #6, the fuck close. I was definitely running game on her, but it felt different. It felt too easy, almost like she was the one picking me up. Maybe this is just how running game at night feels as opposed to during the day? Maybe she was just really horny and wanted to fuck me because she found me hot? Thoughts anyone? For reference, I’ve been consistently rated as a 7 or 8 attractiveness level just on looks alone, not including personality, humor etc. I’d give her a 6. Of course it’s not as important as other things, but I would assume attractiveness level means more in nightgame when talking about SNL’s?
Friday, Jan 24, 2014
Venue(s): The Pint off Jasper and The Ranch Roadhouse
7.Don’t know if this counts as an approach, but I’ll put it in anyway because it’d be nice to have some feedback. My friend invited me out to be his wingman for this girl (Lynn) that he met on pof. It was one of Lynn’s friend’s birthday celebration. We met Lynn and her friend Chantal just outside of Central Social Hall where they were just leaving and walked with them to The pint. Made small talk outside the pint, just getting to know each other type stuff and I lightly teased Chantal as well. Inside the pint, I talked to her a bit more, but it was loud and hard to hear each other. About half hour later we all left and drove in two separate cars to the Ranch Roadhouse. After getting in, I continued chatting up Chantal and teasing her while my friend worked on Lynn. At one point, I remember stepping in between Chantal and another girl after Chantal bumped her because the girl had bumped her first, couple pushes each way, then I held them both back. The other girls friends came over and told me I need to control my girl. I told them to move on and have a nice night while keeping Chantal behind me. (the other girls were all 5 9” + and 150lb + and Chantal is around 5 2” and 120. Later, I danced with Chantal and she had no problem with me getting close and touching her body, hands on both hips, around waist, touching hands, faces an inch apart etc. Seemingly no physical resistance while on the dance floor. (I still pretty much just two step, but I’m trying to get better at dancing, I still feel slightly awkward and uncomfortable when I’m dancing). We then went to the VIP section with everyone as it was one of their friend’s (Lena, but I’ll call her blondie from here on out) birthdays. Sat next to Chantal (A little late, but some pertinent info - Chantal is engaged to another guy and she lives in Calgary (300km away), was born in Germany and I’d give her a 8. She was the DD that night and didn’t have a sip of alcohol all night) and continued small talk and teasing, had a hard time starting threads and routines because of the noise level. Another guy on the other side of Chantal started talking to her and after a couple of minutes, she elbowed him in the face because he got too close to her face. We all left the bar and went back to Lynn’s place in Leduc, where Chantal was also staying for the weekend that she was in town. Birthday Girl Blondie (who was, by then, ridiculously annoying drunk) came too. When I got there my buddi and Lynn started playing N64 Mariokart. Due to blondie being on the loveseat with Chantal and Blondie being stupid drunk, I couldn’t sit next to her and had trouble trying to start a conversation that lasted more than a couple exchanges. Blondie then drags Chantal downstairs to talk. There was also no booze at their place. I didn’t get so much as a make out. Neither did my buddi.
8.Approached an older woman (looked mid-late 30’s) who was standing by the dancefloor when I was alone for a bit. Approach was done mainly as an experiment to see if Chantal would get jealous when she came back because I was talking to another woman. I teased her a bit, etc. don’t really remember the convo at all. Chantal didn’t seem to care, but she did look and notice immediately when she got back. I ended the interaction and went back to talk to Chantal maybe two mins or so after she saw you talking to the older chick.
Notes: Escalate more physically when I don’t encounter resistance. Push the interaction as far as it can go. Maybe I should have tried to kiss her on the dancefloor? Or at least grinded her? Also, packing a full bottle of wine and a bottle of alcohol in my car when I go out is probably a good idea. Next time, when trying to make another girl jealous by opening someone else, make sure the second girl is at least as attractive as the girl I’m trying to make jealous. Also, maybe make the interaction last longer as well. I mostly chalk not getting anything with Chantal in #7 up to both logistics and drunk blondie, but I hate to blame external factors. Other than what I listed above, is there anything that you guys can recommend I should have done differently?
