[kdolo]

"Dear Prudence,

My husband achieved professional success and wealth early in life. His work involved long hours and lots of stress, and by his 30s he decided that he wanted out. His accumulated wealth could easily support our lifestyle indefinitely, so he retired about 18 months ago, shortly after the birth of our first child. He has not found anything to do in that time! We have an excellent nanny 40 hours a week, and outside those hours my husband is an extremely involved father. We split the domestic duties roughly 50–50, as before, but now I am the only one working and he says he shouldn’t be "penalized" by having extra domestic responsibilities. So he spends the week dicking around (gym, squash, books, movies, etc.). It's making me crazy with resentment, especially when I come home from a hard day at work. He tells me I should just quit if I don’t like it, and that I shouldn’t worry about being dependent because he’s set up a trust fund for me and our son. But I also think it sets a bad example for our son to see a father who doesn't have some productive purpose in life. My husband disagrees and says he will be "an excellent corrective to the productionist propaganda schools inflict on kids to make them the unquestioning worker bees the economy demands." He says he doesn't care if our son grows up to work hard and that work is a lamentable necessity and it is only “false consciousness” to think otherwise. I'm tired of this devolving into a sociological debate! How can we resolve this?"

[cardguy]

Something tells me this chick is hard to please.

[samsamsam]

Cardguy, your comment made me think of the FAQ Section from Cards Against Humanity and its 12 days of Xmas thing it was doing.

Question: What if I don’t like one of the 12 gifts?
Answer: What if your expectations for the quality of your life are too high?

[Merenguero]

(11-14-2013 05:04 PM)kdolo Wrote:  

"Dear Prudence,

So he spends the week dicking around (gym, squash, books, movies, etc.).

She sees the gym, squash, and books as "dicking around." That tells me all I need to know about her.

[Christian McQueen]

C-U-N-T.

He's clearly successful, retires EARLY and she still bitches.

I have no words for this at all anymore.

Gents of RVF,

Focus on yourselves and yourselves only. Make yourself happy and NEVER jump through hoops for a bitch.

Make $$$$$, live life and never be a beta bitch.

Sincerely,

McQueen

[scorpion]

A good example of how women are completely controlled by their feelings and emotions.

This man worked his ass off and became wealthy. He funded a trust fund for his wife and kid. He pays a nanny to work for the family 40 hours a week. He tells his wife she can quit her job at any time.

The wife sees none of this. The only thing that matters to her is that she feels jealous and resentful because the husband is not currently working and she is, even though she knows she could quit at any time!

The hamster then creates a justification to cloak her resentment: he's setting a bad example for the children!

It's as if she just thinks all that wealth he earned just sort of appeared in his bank account one day. She is literally incapable of understanding the work he did or even appreciating it. The only thing that matters to her is how she feels at the current moment. If she feels bad and resentful, it's not her fault for being an ungrateful cunt, no...it's the husband's fault for being so successful he can retire early! Truly a stunning display of hamster.

[kdolo]

This is a perfect example of how Western women - and feminism - in the end is all about penis envy.

She is jealous of her husband's success and want to compete with him. This is the source of her resentment - that he is in fact a success who has achieved all that a man is supposed to in a capitalist society.

That's why she is sticking to her ridiculous "career".

The hamster is trying to seek a justification for destroying her marriage so that she can run off with half his wealth and take his children away ......the problem is - she is having trouble coming up with anything and so seeks advice for ideas

[kdolo]

(11-14-2013 05:17 PM)Merenguero Wrote:  

(11-14-2013 05:04 PM)kdolo Wrote:  

"Dear Prudence,

So he spends the week dicking around (gym, squash, books, movies, etc.).

She sees the gym, squash, and books as "dicking around." That tells me all I need to know about her.

she uses the expression "dicking around".

No proper lady would ever use that type of language. This guy screwed up in his choice of mate.

Should have hopped on plane to Lat Am or SEA and met a real woman who wouldn't ever complain about something so ridiculous.

[pheonix500000]

(11-14-2013 05:36 PM)kdolo Wrote:  

This is a perfect example of how Western women - and feminism - in the end is all about penis envy.

She is jealous of her husband's success and want to compete with him. This is the source of her resentment - that he is in fact a success who has achieved all that a man is supposed to in a capitalist society.

That's why she is sticking to her ridiculous "career".

The hamster is trying to seek a justification for destroying her marriage so that she can run off with half his wealth and take his children away ......the problem is - she is having trouble coming up with anything and so seeks advice for ideas

I was just about to say that but if the guy is brilliant to build this level of wealth, i doubt he would be a dumbass and leave himself completely open like that.

[Days of Broken Arrows]

Yep, all the above observations are correct. But this is also about conformity.

Women expect conformity in their men. They're all about uniforms, whether real or metaphorical. What's she's also upset about is he isn't like all the other husbands. And it's hilarious the way he responds to her (almost as if he's been reading Captain Capitalism).

There's a reason that when you see pictures from all those society balls the women are dressed in all sorts of different gowns but all the men are dressed in the same black tuxedo. That's the uniform of the social climbers.

Dunno exactly what the alternative is for men who want to get married. Redneck women with no aspirations of status? Probably not artist chicks because they're flaky and insane and fuck the contractors. Europeans? Asians? Anyone? Bueller?

[Therapsid]

Prudie's response:

"Dear Do,
Since I’ve grappled with such wrenching issues as where the dog sleeps and how big toddler birthday parties should be, I’m willing to take on the agony of having a young, rich husband who’s thrilled to be doing not much of anything. First of all, whatever your husband did for a living, he must have been pretty good at it if he can finance the next 50 years of high-end hanging out without ever having to earn another cent. Having worked like a demon to accumulate this pile, your husband is entitled to feel he deserves a sabbatical. But while many self-made people do indulge in the luxuries great wealth brings, often they continue to be driven to make a mark. Thus, Michael Bloomberg becomes mayor of New York and Bill Gates becomes a mega philanthropist. I can understand that it would be irritating to have a life partner who while still in his 30s contemplates the rest of life as one long Margaritaville. More irritating would be marrying the consummate capitalist who now spouts Marxist prattle.

The other problem is your resentment of the fact that you’re still out grinding away while he’s perfecting his squash game. But that’s on you. Stop making your husband’s yammering about the oppression of having a job sound correct. If you enjoy your career and want to go at it full bore, then do so. He may not acknowledge the irony that in order for him to pursue his freedom from work, he needs to employ someone to change his son’s diapers. But since you do pay someone to do this, stop insisting your husband take on these duties during the nanny’s work week. And as your son is not yet toilet trained, don’t spend too much time worrying about where your son will align himself in the class struggle. You are having a difficult time accepting that the hard-working man you married has been newly minted as a man of leisure. But instead of carping at him, start having some gentle and genuine talks about what you both want out of life. Tell him you think of him as so accomplished and productive that when he’s done unwinding, you hope a cause of some kind engages his attention. Given your family’s resources and smarts, surely there’s something the two of you could work on together to make your community, even the world, a better place.

—Prudie"

Nothing here about being grateful that her husband has so handsomely provided for the wife and their child, and that he's willing able to support her if she should retire early herself.

No, it's the wife's job to coerce her husband to go back to work even when he doesn't have to or even worse, to make work for himself by pursuing charitable causes which he has no interest in.

[Damascus]

This idiot bitch has the opportunity to have a nice live without the grind of corporate work? Ungrateful broad. I hope her husband leaves her for another woman and she has to pay him alimony.

[bacon]

I dont know how many readers on this site follow the early retirement websites/forums. But I do from time to time.

Anyway I find it funny how many of these men scrimp and save but never consider how fucked they will be in the event of divorce or if the wife dosent go along with him retiring. Here is one case study:

Quote:

Anyway, here is my problem: I am a BIG FAT GUTLESS PHONY! That’s right. As far as I’m concerned I can afford to retire now at 54 years of age. Our net worth (the wife and I) incuding the house, is $4.25 million. However, any time I suggest to the wife that I am packing it in (I hate the meaninglessness, imposterism, drudgery, uncertainty, depression inducing self-esteem sucking, soul wrenching boredom, of my useless pseudo-middle-management-faking-it-all-day-$100K a year plus automobile-desk-job), she disagrees and expresses concerns about our lifestyle and the children.

[Brodiaga]

He shouldnt have married the fucking cunt. If he didn't, he would have retired in his 20s.

[Fender_Bender]

Jesus christ these women really are impossible to placate in this ridiculous society. Just another reason to focus on yourself and not waste your potential on marriage to one of these shrews. How insane is it that he was successful enough for early retirement and spends his time improving himself and she sees no value in this? What an ungrateful bitch.

[Agent 47]

Part of me thinks this is an elaborate troll to annoy the manosphere.

[kdolo]

(11-14-2013 06:01 PM)bacon Wrote:  

I dont know how many readers on this site follow the early retirement websites/forums. But I do from time to time.

Anyway I find it funny how many of these men scrimp and save but never consider how fucked they will be in the event of divorce or if the wife dosent go along with him retiring. Here is one case study:

Quote:

Anyway, here is my problem: I am a BIG FAT GUTLESS PHONY! That’s right. As far as I’m concerned I can afford to retire now at 54 years of age. Our net worth (the wife and I) incuding the house, is $4.25 million. However, any time I suggest to the wife that I am packing it in (I hate the meaninglessness, imposterism, drudgery, uncertainty, depression inducing self-esteem sucking, soul wrenching boredom, of my useless pseudo-middle-management-faking-it-all-day-$100K a year plus automobile-desk-job), she disagrees and expresses concerns about our lifestyle and the children.

WRONG. The wife is concerned about HER lifestyle and that of the children - the man's concern's are the least of her concerns.

[Kingsley Davis]

"So he spends the week dicking around (gym, squash, books, movies, etc.)"

The husband married a much lower class prole broad.

[Mikev75]

She wants him to DO something. So, he should do the nanny.

[The Lizard of Oz]

I think this woman's whining is amusing and very easy to understand on a human level. It's hardly a sign of great nobility, but it's not a sign of great evil, either. Just part of the comedy of life.

In fact, this could very easily serve as the plot of an old fashioned screwball comedy. I can see Cary Grant playing the husband loafing around the house in his extremely comfortable "early retirement" robe, extravagantly pleased with himself but secretly bored out of his mind, and provoking the resentment, verging on murderous hatred, of his wife (played by Irene Dunne) who clings to her useless department store job.

Quote:

My husband disagrees and says he will be "an excellent corrective to the productionist propaganda schools inflict on kids to make them the unquestioning worker bees the economy demands."

Yeah, I can very easily see Cary throwing off a line like that.

By the way, for those guys who have no idea what I'm talking about, check out some of these old Cary Grant movies. "The Awful Truth" is a great one to start with, and others are "My Favorite Wife", "Penny Serenade", "Room for one More". You might be surprised how much you enjoy them.

[kdolo]

(11-14-2013 10:21 PM)The Lizard of Oz Wrote:  

I think this woman's whining is amusing and very easy to understand on a human level.

Her whining is not amusing. There is nothing to understand.

What exactly here is the problem ????

Its dangerous if you ask me. She causing stress to this man's life when he has already done a great job of eliminating the major stress that people have in their lives - money.

[WestCoast]

Same story different tune.

All you really need to read is the dude killed it. Find a way to kill it and just don't get married = win.

It's real easy in the states so just put in that time guys.

Also as he says you should work smart not "hard".

[InternationPlayboy]

Wow, this man is living every other mans dream in terms of being financially successful, and still it's not enough. Maybe she should go marry a construction worker that brings home $40k a year, I'm sure she'd be happy then.

[Mentavious]

(11-15-2013 01:43 PM)InternationPlayboy Wrote:  

Wow, this man is living every other mans dream in terms of being financially successful, and still it's not enough. Maybe she should go marry a construction worker that brings home $40k a year, I'm sure she'd be happy then.

That's funny. So women go three ways

1. He only works 40 hour per week but doesn't make enough money. Why aren't you working more?

2. He makes a lot of money but he works too many hours. I don't feel appreciated anymore!!!

3. He made alot of money so he doesn't have to work anymore. Now he just sits at home or does whatever while I'm working!! He is a lazy dirt bag.

[Tytalus]

You guys seriously need to read some Athol Kay.

The problem is that lazing around "doing nothing" is a LTR DLV. A woman wants to see her man accomplishing something, anthing. It doesn't have to be a cubicle job. She'd be happy if he started learning how to fix everything in the house by himself without having to hire a handyman. If he started upgrading the flooring, putting in heated tiles etc. Write a novel, start volunteering at a charity.

If he did something like that I bet she would be fine.

Women are genetically programmed to look for men who are doing something. Because on an instinctual level, a man doing "nothing" is not going to feed her & her children. A man doing something will feed her.