[A War You Cannot Win]

I've seen a few wolf packs fall apart and get scattered with the wind in my time. I became comfortable with this inevitability when I realized I wouldn't want to be friends with the majority of the people I meet anyway, so being a quasi-loner with a few long term friends works for me.

[CJ_W]

(07-29-2013 01:35 PM)Samseau Wrote:  

I don't know what the secret to having close friends is. However, I've had close friends my entire life. I think it's one of the reasons for my confidence - no matter what happens to me, or what I say to someone, I always have a core group of loyal friends that I've known for over years (going on 10 years now).

I genuinely enjoy the company of other men, much moreso than women. I find men with similar interests - chiefly philosophy or video games, and spend lots of time with them enjoying those activities together. I'm also currently making friends through dancing.

I've had a few short-term player friendships, but generally they never last. Most of the players I've met are basket cases who focus on women so much they have nothing else in their lives to show for it except their job. Which is fine, I guess, but it's kinda boring. I do meet players who have a solid head on their shoulders from time to time, but usually these guys are so wrapped up in their lives they don't have time for friends.

The secret to having close friends, is not to hang out with them too much, I have a few close friends, and I hung out with them once every few weeks or every other month.

And yes, you'll meet the players who don't have time for many friends. It's pretty normal actually, You really only need maybe 1-2 close friends.

But yeah Most player friends (ESPECIALLY the PUA community guys) are usually pretty damn weird, I haven't really met any red pill guys (except my late grandfather) yet so I don't really know how I'd fare with them as close friends, but I'm sure I'd probably get on all right, as I stopped going out with dudes for the purpose of picking up chicks, been there, done that. I prefer to do that alone.

I don't tell people (save for my closest friends who kinda already knew) that I meet women regularly. In fact, one of my close friends is female (no plans on getting that notch ever) and she KNOWS I know about women/men and asks me advice all the time.

For a woman, being friends with a guy who actually knows what the hell is going on is invaluable, as I can tell her the why's and the how's about stuff. . .of course that's if shes' willing to listen. It's very rare to meet a woman (as friends) like that. I DO hear about all the dumb shit guys do (and fail) to get her female freinds though. . .that's a laugh. As most of those guys do so at the risk of their jobs/livelyhoods!

You guys have no idea how dumb dues with no game are, which is why I totally agree about not teaching friends who have no game, unless they ask and prove that they are ready for it.

[Player_1337]

After developing my game, and subsequently sleeping with a lot of girls- all of my old friends are horrified by my player mentality. Anyone else have a similar experience?

[Samseau]

Quote:

The secret to having close friends, is not to hang out with them too much, I have a few close friends, and I hung out with them once every few weeks or every other month.

Really?

I hang out with my close friends almost every week, or every day.

[Vaun]

(07-29-2013 09:02 PM)cardguy Wrote:  

(07-29-2013 03:44 PM)puckman Wrote:  

read this the other day and laughed with some nervous laughter

http://www.theonion.com/articles/unambit...ill,33233/

there is some truth to this, but I hated my high school so much that I dropped out and live 1000 miles away. I see all of my high school friends who still keep in touch and havent really moved on and made new friends, or a new social circle. Most of them didnt go to college or really get out into the world, so they all keep in touch on Facebook all the time, what I consider a stunted adult life. I have my own life but still have my best friends who are 20 yr+ friends. I was married for 10 years in a new city with no family, and getting out after a divorce has been tough, but I have mine. Crossfit is an instant source of friends and I meet a lot of good people there. As far as game, forget it, its all me, have never relied on friends to help there. I make friends in business all the time but 99% of the time people are just out for their piece of the pie, like that ROK article a while ago.

That is a really accurate piece of satire.

One of the defining things of the modern age - is people being desperate to leave their home towns and starting a new life elsewhere.

I am not saying it is a good or a bad thing. But it seems to be an unexamined need which is drilled into us by the media. And the expectations of society. And is quite a shift from how society was before the rise of consumerism and advertising.

Cui bono

I agree, but it depends where your from. I come from a small city close to, but way worse off than Detroit. I would compare it to the north of England, but without a music scene, with rednecks and poorer. My buddy there, father of two, has a 4 hour commute to the next city, just to have a decent job. Smartest guy I know and could easily be a '1%'er' in any major city. But they are happy in their $80K house near their extended family and almost exact description in that article. For me its not an option and I have nothing really tying me there, except for my parents who I fly to see and stay with me multiple times a year.

[muc]

I agree that some pick-up community guys are pretty weird. But so far all the people I have met through RVF were cool.

I have a few very close friends since school. But lately it's gotten a bit strange. We don't have as much in common any more it seems. Also, when we are out girls gravitate to me (lately even more so, because I really stepped up with the gym last few months), including girls they like. So perhaps jealousy plays a role?

I don't know. i want the best of both worlds though. I want to see a girl once or twice a week, go to the gym 3 times, but spend one evening playing playstation or having BBQs with the guys. Whatever their lifestyle is.

[Balboa]

Got my own wolf pack going on...

[Tengen]

I'm in my mid-20's and still have a small group of friends i've know for 6+ years, and within this group maybe 1-2 i am pretty close with and can talk about almost anything.

This was illustrated very strongly to me when I started deleting "friends" from my facebook account. Down from 300+ to less than 30 over the course of months.

First it was the random bitches/betas I added while i went out.

Then it was the people from high school.

Another large batch from university, the large majority again just bitches i wanted to fuck but didn't have the game to... then slowly watched them hit the wall as they posted pics.

A smaller uni group i was kind of close with but drifted away from because the guys were too beta and the girls were ugly.

Then it came down to people i worked with in the past. Odd jobs, the burger joint, that one internship. Delete.

The people who are left, it's strange how we are still friends. Sort of a young social group that grew up together and had drinks, played poker and talked big. And then there was an incident involving a cute but BPD chick that almost tore the group apart, but we survived

I probably still haven't finished though. Maybe i'm becoming a tinfoil-hat guy but ultimately i want to unplug from mainstream society. Probably the trigger was the whole PRISM scandal revealed by Edward Snowden. I don't watch TV or read the local newspapers anymore, too much blue-pull feminist brainwashing. I have https://prism-break.org/ bookmarked. I already deleted Chrome browser and am using Firefox with all the privacy plugins. DL'd and burnt a disc with LinuxMint ready to install once i get a new laptop.

Anyway, maybe i'm starting to get off topic. I guess the point is true friendship is probably just as rare as true love. Cherish it while you can.

[cardguy]

I find as I get older I don't care as much about seeing my friends.

I am close to my brothers - and see them once every couple of weeks or so.

But - my best friend - I might only see 3/4 times a year.

And I am cool with that - I am just too busy doing my own shit. I can't imagine what it must be like for those with kids.

[WestCoast]

^ I agree with this 100%.

Every year it gets worse, less and less willing to hang out with friends. I frequently cut people off and have no qualms about it. I prefer soft touch friendships.

This is likely an American culture thing though.

[AntiTrace]

I've got two friends that I would consider true friends, known them both for 10 years or so. They both live across the country, so I see them once every other year or so. One other that would be a close friend, he across the country as well.

You really find out who is true friend once you start bringing attractive females around

My wolf pack has been hit hard three seperate times, all because of women I was dating at the time I had a choice to move a new location. Each time, without fail, within a few days of me being gone all my "friends" were hollering at my girl.

[Aliblahba]

Some of you guys seem really lonely. It makes me sad. If you need an uber cool friend for social proofing or to show grand ma, PM me and I'll add you on Facebook.

[Statsi]

I have 2 friends. That's it. Now I have an abundance of folk that I can call up to grab a beer, or to hang out with. However I have very high standards when it comes to friends, you have to be red pill for a start, take care of yourself, have to have proven yourself to have my back. Basically everything should be better to share with your brothers in arms, work, play, and even simple joys like eating and drinking. Every other guy and girl I know better have some utility to me, keeping friends just cause you happened to go to the same school who drain you emotionally and can't take care of business is fucking dumb.

[DVY]

I have friends for different purposes- going out, biz talk, sports, food, etc etc. I guess that makes them more than acquantices and less than "true" friends.

Take it for whats its worth and dont force it to become something its not.

[Giovonny]

I've had the same friends since 3rd grade. Almost 30 years.

I don't need any new ones.

If you are always changing friends, you have no friends.

Only 1 or 2 will really be there when you need them.

[WestCoast]

I'll choose the no friends route 100 times out of a 100.

I have a few that I've known for many years (we talk 2x per year) but even then you never know.

If one of them ever asks for money then you'll quickly see if they are legit friends.

"When you loan a friend money, you're seeing what kind of person they are"

Seen that one play out many times already within an old social circle.

Another great quote:

"Who do I trust? Me motherfucker that's who"

Relying on people for anything is a long-term recipe for disaster.

[Low Status Beta]

(07-30-2013 07:02 AM)Balboa Wrote:  

Got my own wolf pack going on...

nice site, just bookmarked

[Kickb]

Wc - I asked my friend for $9 last week because I left my wallet at my apt.

Does that make me a piece of Shit!

[WestCoast]

^ lol no.

If you loan someone a couple grand then you'll see what kind of person they are.

[Aliblahba]

None of my friends ever ask to borrow money, because they are all grown ass independent men. Birds of a feather.

[InternationPlayboy]

It all just depends. It sounds like yes, in your scenario, getting new friends is the answer, but a lot of my friends have stayed awesome since high school and are still killing it. In fact many are in better shape than they were 7 years ago. Even after being away from home for 7 years I still have many friends I'm in contact with to this day and still see a couple times a year. Hell, I just hug out with a friend from Vegas the night before last who was in town. Many of them we meet up and its like we've been hanging out every week for the last 7 years still, and many I've been friends with since elementary school. I have very few close friends who have gotten married and the few who have amazingly still like to hang out and have cool wives. Off the top of my head I can't think of any close friends I have that have kids and the ones who have had kids I rarely talk to. Shit, most of my friends growing up were players and have remained players to this day. I used to be the one who didn't pull, but I've stepped up my game exponentially in the last 5 years and now even out pull many of them. I've definitely lost some friends to girls though. Almost every time the girl has eventually broken up with them and since the kid spent 5 years hanging out with only their girl, they got dumped and had really no one to turn to. Life sucked for them after their break ups, and one friend that comes to mind, it seems like his life still sucks even after 5 years of being broke up. That woman completely ate him alive. I still don't know if he's over her, I haven't talked to him in 8 months, but I know 3 years after the break up, he pathetically still had hope they'd get back together. I just can't hang with that, he needs to step up his manhood game. Poor guy used to be the biggest player in school, now he's stuck with his dick in his hand because he was out of the game so long. I see his Facebook and the girls he occasionally bangs and they're easily a good 2 points bellow what he used to bang.

I've dropped a lot of friends for various reasons but I still have a solid group, many of whom are scattered all across the country, which is awesome because I always have a place to stay and a city to visit should I choose to. I've bounced around a lot and had a lot of opprotunities to meet all sorts of people. I think the older you get the harder it is to make friends, but the easier it is to weed people out at the same time. I agree you should be making new friends, but that doesn't necissarily mean you should drop your old friends. Just be selective so you don't have to drop them. I pretty much know within an hour of meeting someone whether or not they're someone id like to hang out with again.