[Tuthmosis]

Fact Pattern:

I have a buddy (formally) from work who's been married to this broad for several years. His views are somewhat blue pill but, overall, he's a pretty tough guy, who excelled in sports and has some decent game. When I talk manosphere type of stuff with him, he gets it, and adds his own solid insights. Unfortunately, he bought into the whole family-man myth and went for it when he accidentally knocked up this somewhat ghetto chick from a small town. They have one kid together. They got married, he bought a house, two cars, the works.

The guy works a blue-collar type of profession and makes good money (I don't know exactly, but my guess is mid-to-high 100K range). He caught her cheating on him once and--against everyone's advice, especially my own--gave the bitch another chance. Needless to say, he caught her again recently and threw her the fuck out of the house this time (I don't know if she's actually left yet). He's definitely doing the right thing this time around and getting a divorce, though there'd clearly be a custody discussion as well as other divorce-style financial arrangements.

Additional Drama:

There were some whispers a while back that his kid doesn't look like him and--given her pattern of behavior--it's not that far-fetched that some guy snuck in there around the same time my friend was raw-dogging it and knocked her up. I mean, the kid really doesn't look like him. Against my better judgment, I brought it up with him some time ago and he was, understandably, not very happy at having that conversation. After a while, he was like, "At this point, I don't even care if he's 'my son,' he's my son," and closed the conversation.

And, truth be told, that ship has sailed since, legally speaking, he's supported the kid for long enough that it's de facto his. Not to mention he's bonded with him.

My Thoughts:

This is a seriously fucked up situation, even with if the kid rumors aren't true (which is very possible). I feel bad for the guy, even though I know he'll turn out fine. This dude seems made of stone, so I know he won't cave into the pressure, but I know he needs support from the people he can trust around him.

I needn't restate everything I've said in the almost 6,000 posts I have on this forum about: not trusting women, the marriageability of American women, the meta discussion of divorce rape, the importance of not wife-ing up ghetto piece-of-shit bitches like this broad, the bullshit behind non-obligatory paternity tests, the importance of not raw-dogging certain types of chicks, taking the red pill, etc. etc.

I'm just trying to mobilize the amazingly rich collective wisdom of the forum to help my buddy.

Questions:

What are some pieces of advice that I can send this cat's way as he enters this fucked up situation? Anything from legal to logistical to philosophical would be useful, and good to know for other future situations. Whatever you got, throw it out. I plan on having a serious heart-to-heart in the next day or two, so let the knowledge flow.

[Vaun]

tell him to visit dads divorce and read the list

[WestCoast]

If I were in your shoes trying to help him.

The main thing i would focus in on is swallowing his pride to get the kid blood tested; this will at least let the court know if the kid really isn't his. He can still be "his son" but knowing with certainty that it is not (by blood) would be of value to him. Hard to convince him to do this, ideally he will listen to you. I would do anything and everything to get that sorted out.

Beyond that you know the drill: 1) find as many ways possible to protect current assets, give cash saved to family etc and 2) lock up all financial assets she'll try to snake them

Guessing the lawyers on here have better ideas as my mind would focus on immediately finding ways to keep financial assets away from her.

[assman]

Get the kid tested, but don't let the wife know. If he uses a non-local testing service, have the results envelope sent to a trusted friend (or family member).

Get a lawyer, but don't let the wife know (if she finds out, she will immediately lawyer up, if she hasn't already).

Record ALL interactions with her (audio would be easiest); again, don't let her know (assuming this is legal in his state). In divorce, women are often advised to get a restraining order in order to gain advantage in the settlement and custody fights. All she has to do is get up on the stand and say he was violent toward her or their child. No further proof necessary. So he had better be prepared for that.

Do NOT move out of the house. Married guys often make this mistake, trying to make peace during the separation/divorce, and then find out that the status of the woman living in the house with the child is used against them (so as not to disturb the child's living arrangement).

If he has firearms, have a trusted friend hold them temporarily - just taking away a potential lie that she could use to get a restraining order (do it without her knowing and he might be able to catch her in a lie).

[Wadsworth]

Record everything is probably his best bet at this point. If he can catch her perjuring herself he'll be in an advantageous position to make a deal.

[Basil Ransom]

"I brought it up with him some time ago and he was, understandably, not very happy at having that conversation. After a while, he was like, "At this point, I don't even care if he's 'my son,' he's my son," and closed the conversation."

I don't have any advice to offer, because the man has already indicated a willingness to live a comfortable lie, instead of opting for potentially harsh truth. I'm not saying this to judge him per se, just to note that it's usually fruitless to offer counsel to a man who yearns for ignorance. Best of luck in helping him, as I have no patience for such.

However, recent affairs (hehe) may have made him more receptive to the truth. Maybe drop some bait and see if he bites. Unsolicited advice often meets with the least respect, when the recipient is too proud to listen.

[Menace]

Ok, first thing, I would not do anything so drastic as kicking her out of the house. In fact, he should try to keep things as normal as possible, difficult as it may be. Keep a journal of everything that happens. Consult an attorney ASAP. Some states require a non-cohabitation period (i.e. no sex) for a certain period before you file for divorce.

He should know that her cheating is unlikely to be held against her in court. Also, she will turn into someone he doesn't even recognize if shit hits the fan and it gets nasty.

Another thing I would recommend, if possible, is to NOT litigate. She sounds kind of stupid, so it may be possible to buy her off with a joint settlement agreement that appears generous but is actually less than she might otherwise be entitled to. She sounds like she could be persuaded with some cash up front, or a car, etc. He needs to look at the big picture.

The alternative is mediation: both of them will sit with a mediator and hash out the terms. It will require disclosure of accounts, so if he wants to do any skullduggery, now is the time to it, although I don't recommend it. He must get her to waive alimony. I strongly recommend mediation! It will be WAY cheaper than going to court.

If he goes to the courthouse of his county there is usually an attorney there who is volunteering for pro bono requirements that can give him some free advice and provide some forms for filing an uncontested divorce. I would get those forms ready.

Child support is a statutory matter, so anything in the agreement about that will be carefully scrutinized by the court, but as long as it's reasonable, it's unlikely they would disturb it. My suggestion is just to offer the statutory minimum, which he can calculate either using his state's child support guidelines or have an attorney help him.

Custody is going to be the tricky part. If he is okay with her having physical custody and him visiting, fine. If not, it can get expensive to contest.
All of this is based on doing things the "civilized" way. Is his name on the birth certificate? DNA test can be done easily from a cheek swab. As other have stated, his wife should not know anything about what is happening initially.

[Dex]

Testing the kid won't really help him. If he wants to be the kids father, the test won't do anything good. Knowing the truth won't make his life better when raising that kid. There is a reason for the saying "ignorance is bliss". If he doesn't want to take care of the kid, then test the kid, if he wants to play a part in the kids life, then don't get tested.

[painter]

I think one piece of advice for him that I've always used (and have fallen victim to) is: Give her enough rope to hang herself.

A cheating slut who wants out of her marriage to slut it up will make all kinds of dumb mistakes. Sure they won't be held against her too much but they add up and at some point they tip the scales in your buddy's favor.

That's only if he goes the legal route which is a fucking minefield. The only ones who win that game are the lawyers.

Definitely tell him to keep his head at all times, even if he's going ballistic inside.

Send him to this forum too, it's hideous but it might open his eyes up a bit and at least let him see what other people in his situation are going through: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking...n-divorce/

[The Beast1]

Let him go. He has made his own divorce court death bed. At best tell him he's going to be paying his own money to raise another man's child. That's what a cuckold does.

Ghetto bitches love men like him. The bitch will be making a killing in the divorce.

[samsamsam]

Play it normal, let her back in like last time. She thinks she got away with it.

In the background start making all the arrangements to bitch slap her. Moving assets, obtaining evidence to mount a serious case against her.

Not advocating for this site http://www.mydivorceplan.com/ but it is along the lines of what I am talking about.

She needs to think she owns him, he needs to play along like a bitch - without making her think like anything is up. Arrogant/Narcissistic/Bullying types always think they will get away with shit. And they beg/squeal when you lay the wood to them.

He has to set the trap and move the money. Maybe even re-locate for work (I doubt it is possible) to find a favorable state (if there is one even).

Don't take it lying down. She will just encourage others around her. It would be better for society if she got destroyed and all the information about her got out, so other women know better.

[Bolthouse]

Have him go to Vegas.

He's uber stressed, which will be the root for his upcoming gambling and alcohol addictions.

His new gambling addiction will progressively get worse and worse. He'll start at 2k a day, before he knows it it'll be up to 15k a day in cash withdrawals. Whether that cash gets blown on slots, blackjack, poker or whatever, there won't be any records of where it's gone and due to his stress-induced drunken haze he won't be expected to remember.

[MikeCF]

1. Offense.

File first. File first. File first. File first. File first. File first. File first. File first. File first. File first. File first. File first. File first.

Did you know that women file for divorce in 70% of cases? They also, on average, plan their divorce out 2-3 years in advance.

Filing first offers really huge advantages. It catches the other party off guard. Ask how a man who "never saw it coming" felt. Demoralized. Defeated.

Filing first also puts you in control of the legal procedures, as the other side has to respond to your filings rather than the other way around.

2. Play defense.

He needs to anticipate a false domestic violence or rape charge being brought against him. He needs to have a camera on him at all times. He must not fuck her ever again or else she can claim rape.

[MikeCF]

I disagree with the blood testing stuff.

This whole, "I could never raise another man's child," stuff is overblown. Love is love and he is not going to stop loving his son because the son is "not his."

I love my god daughters. If my friend died, I would raise the girls as my own even though my genetic DNA would not be passed on by their living.

[Bacchus]

Don't skimp on the divorce attorney. You get what you pay for with these guys. Even if your friend's divorce procedure isn't especially acrimonious, it's better to have a cutthroat attorney who specializes in divorce in his corner even when he doesn't really need one than to wish he had one.

My uncle is living proof of this. He had a successful career. His wife stayed at home. Then, she left him to be with a woman. He hired his buddy as his lawyer for cheap and wound up having to pay child support and alimony, all while getting stuck with limited time with his kids. It took him years and a different lawyer to unfuck up that arrangement.

[vinman]

1. Document everything. If it's not written down it didn't happen.
2. Find out what the eaves dropping laws in your state are for recording your interactions. A lawyer can help.
3. Get receipts for everywhere you shop and keep them. This is your alibi for "he hit me/ threatened me/ stalking me.
4. Find a way to stalk yourself via your phone GPS to document your comings and goings.
5. Save ALL written and electronic correspondences.
6. Photograph yourself before and after ALL face to face communications (see number 3).

At all times think defensively.
"This ain't checkers! It's CHESS"!- Alonzo, Training Day

[LowerCaseG]

Depending how old the child is, it's irrelevant if the child is biologically his or not. He has assumed the role of the child's parent, thus is responsible for the child. It's called de-facto parent. It sounds like the wife is the primary caretaker from your description. Does she work or stay at home?

Although a lot of the above members advice is technically true about record everything, save everything, photograph everything etc... but your friend is going to go nuts. When people are under a lot of stress, they don't think clearly. I think playing the simp is probably the better avenue. Restraining orders are highly likely to happen. File first file first file first is even more important in restraining orders. I have written about that stuff previously:

http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-18067....ning+order

I would also recommend a book called "Splitting"

http://www.amazon.com/Splitting-Protecti...=splitting

It focuses on how to divorce someone with a personality disorder.

Tuth, buy your friend the book, its a nice gesture without getting too into his business.

BTW, never been remotely close to being married, so I don't have any first hand experience with divorces.

[Tuthmosis]

Thanks to everyone for chiming in so far. Keep it coming.

I'm making some mental notes of few bullet points to tell the guy to get his juices flowing. Some of the source material (websites, books) might be a little much for him right now, but I'll feel out where he is.

Here are some of my talking points:

1. File first!
2. Don't move out of the house
3. Record everything (written or otherwise)
4. Move and protect assets
5. Save receipts and records for alibis against potential (even likely) false accusations
6. Expect the worst from her (this we all know from being red pill)
7. Angle for mediation
8. Don't have sex with her again (I doubt he would)

[lurker]

9. Go have preliminary case discussions with as many of the best family attorneys in town as he can deal with/afford.

Paternity isn't really up for debate at this point - legally, he has a short window to challenge it after the birth of the child. Most states have a one-year timeframe. Sounds like it's moot anyway.

[Kabal]

I have previously relayed on here before an excellent WallStreetOasis post about "beating the courts" in divorce:

Quote:

In my earlier years I worked in audit, and was seconded onto forensic projects out of need for resource. I developed a knack for it, and have since worked on a lot of high profile cases (including some of the BB Banks and multi billionaires).

I’ve seen the evidence the forensic accountants get, how they analyse the data in front of them and how the whole process fits into a court case. Therefore I’m well placed to provide a few tips of how to defend yourself in such a case. This isn’t legal advice, your lawyers do that, it’s the accountant advice. It's also pretty long. Sorry about that.

To explain this properly, you need to understand the whole process and how it fits in under the legal system. So with a short run through of a typical process, with the reasoning behind it: You receive a letter from her legal team informing you of the legal proceedings against you, sometimes with an amount for an out of court settlement.

1.A court date is agreed, and one of 2 things happens. For the divorce, her legal team will appoint a bunch of forensic accountants to go through all your finances (yes you will have to declare “everything”) for them to go through. This court date will be requested based on her account of how complicated your finances are. If she says you just have a current account, savings account and some investments held at a bank, they will not need to ask for extra time to prepare their case.

2.Her lawyers need to build their case by the court date, but they have no evidence or facts. The forensic accountants are the ones that do that. So the forensic accountant minions need to trawl through the evidence, and collect it together into a summary of evidence, which the partner will then write in a report to either give to the lawyers, OR have to present in court himself (if he’s been hired as an expert witness).

3.The lawyers collect this report, integrate it with their own resourced information (her account), cherry picking the facts from it to best support their argument and will present it by the court date. The judge/jury will hear the case and make a decision based on this.

4.They will make a ruling which has the authority to transfer assets from one party to the other. The accountants do not.

A pretty bleak picture. But there is hope. Let’s look at the incentivisation structure of accountants, and the risk vs. Reward model of them. Bear with me, this will all make sense in the end.

a)First thing you’ll notice is bonuses are low, often lower than 10% of salary. Part of the ethical structure of accountancy firms forbids high bonuses, from their audit side. Remuneration is echoed across departments to stop mass exodus. This pay structure attracts people that are risk averse.

b)Secondly, what you won’t appreciate, is how few staff these departments have (even the massive ones). For cost reasons, they will have a low number of core staff, and when work comes in, they contract in new people for the duration, based on what they need, and tell them to go home afterwards.

c)Their value is their brand. (e.g. Arthur Andersen). If their name is no longer worth anything, then they lose everything. They will not risk their brand it for anything. They will only put their name to either certainties, or within certain parameters defined in their audit reports, hence the “from what we have seen” style lines you see in company filings.

d)Appraisal process is influenced heavily by costs and towing the line. We are encouraged to charge fewer hours, to increase the projects alleged profitability.

How can you use this to your advantage?

Ok your goal to avoid an amputation of assets is to disrupt the above sequence 1-4, by putting as many spanners in the processes that revolve around a-c, in any and every way legally possible.

Remember they’re unincentivised and paid the same regardless of the outcome of the case (they’re clever like that), so they either don’t care what their report shows or they won’t risk their brand on inconclusive evidence.

Also, any contract workers they bring in are paid by the hour, and are therefore incentivised for the job to go on for longer than it otherwise should.

Now to start being helpful.

Stop them having a full report by the court date:

Obfuscation
It’s really the oldest trick in the book. You have to hand over all the information you have regarding your accounts/assets. I’m sure you’d love to comply. Hand over everything. EVERYTHING, at least twice, as late as possible.

On a recent case, the evidence we received from the other side, was in pdf format. It was a scan of every document this guy had relating to his accounts. 19 Pdf’s in total, each about 13-17,000 pages long The files were a few GB in size, take 2-5 minutes to open, will frequently cause programmes (Word/Excel) to crash on company laptops (they won’t buy new ones in just for a one off job), cannot be emailed, can’t be worked on from home or remotely (since they don’t let temporary staff take data offsite). No coherent order, no page numbers, not even the right way up in a lot of cases, huge amounts of duplicates and about 80% of them were in Russian. (Documents in a different alphabet are really hard to identify conclusively as duplicates, having triplicates for these can give the impression you have more Russian accounts than you actually have, leading to them over hiring soviets and be under resourced in other departments).

The above is a stroke of genius on many levels. Firstly, the way that this information is entered into a computer system is, you guessed it, manually (because accountancy firms are technophobes, I was ordered not to use macros to generate over 200 pivot tables). While it isn’t typed up word for word, these documents are given a unique identifier by the lawyers, and then a spreadsheet or similar is drawn up to give a keyword summary search if you want to look for bank account numbers etc. Now if parts of this are in Russian, and some are in English, to understand them (and I mean to enable the English speaking lawyers to understand them), you need bilinguals. They will need to be hired in, by the accountancy firm. To keep costs down this will be done sparingly and cheaply, very unincentivised staff and quality control will be next to nonexistent. Additionally, anyone that has worked with a Russian translator, will know that if you give the same document to 3 different translators, you get 3 different translations back. This slows the whole process down, creating inaccuracies in their data set and gives them fewer days between then and the court date to work with.

If I were to improve on the above steps, I would use more banks, in more languages, in different date format zones. Liechtenstein, Cyprus, Switzerland all mix things up. You’d be amazed at the havoc dd/mm/yy can cause in a mm/dd/yy spreadsheet, especially when a trained unincentivised chimpanzee is doing the typing. Again, polluting the data set. One date wrong in a series of transactions and they have to start over again on the tracing process, with extra low morale and one angry manager.

Create Doubt:

So you have your set of holding companies across the globe. Of course they need funding. So you need to borrow money. From yourself. How do you do that? Well the best trick, that creates amazing amounts of paperwork is this:
You own entity A and C, that bank with D and F banks respectively.
Entity A wants to borrow $100 dollars. He agrees with the bank to borrow that money. But how does it get this 0% interest loan? Entity C will guarantee it, 100% and set aside the funds for it do to this in another account.

The agreements get drawn up, A borrows the money from D, while C transfer the money from its account in F to D. This $100 is now in D’s account. The bank does not have to disclose this to any court order, and never will. Therefore the link to this is now lost. ‘A’ instantly defaults on its’ loan repayments, and D claims the $100 from A. Money is transferred successfully, but there is no paper trail for the forensics to PROVE this (since to complete the transaction it will need access to Bank F’s statements, which the court order will not permit).

Additionally, they will need to dig up the following documents relating to this transaction: The loan agreement, the guarantee agreement AND the bank statements for both companies. Quite a bit longer than finding 1 bank statement from either company. It goes without saying the contract reference numbers for each of these should be very typoable. Imagine sifting through a dataset of the following reference styles using ctrl F to find it: 101110110101, 1Il (thats one “i and L”) 1o0 (ten zero, and 101 one hundred and one). This works best when crossing currencies, so bank F receives in it’s GBP account, and sends out in its $ account, registering different account numbers on the statements, extra fun confusion.

So if I create a new account for my amazing new holding company, entity B, transfer $100 into it from entity A, use that $100 to buy 1 share of a real company that actually does something, at $100, the accountants can easily conclude that I bought $100 worth of shares for entity A. What about if the account already had $1000 in it? What if that $1000 came from a loan from entity C which was an account funded by entity Z? Didn’t even know what entity Z is? Oh it’s in an Icelandic Bank (paper statements, obviously)? Time to call up the recruitment agency and find an Icelandic translator. They all add up to another few days killed off before the court deadline.

Teamwork: So you have a friend, Mr X. You transfer $100 to a join account you operate, and that account buys the $100 of the same shares above. The account was funded 80:20 by Mr X. Did you pay for that share or did he? Obviously his requires a friend you can trust that way.

Ultimately, the accountancy firm will need to sign a report, with their name on it, that states what they believe is the financial position at a specified date. The only person that knows the actual position is you, and you’ll only prove them wrong if they go too high. They get paid the same regardless of what they conclude, so will opt for the one that incurs the least cost and risk. Therefore they will be conservative, and only conclude on items they can trace completely within the time frame. Keep that as low as possible.

Beating Me
I’m probably your biggest nightmare on this, the smart ass who’s solid with numbers and technology. Number patterns, and account numbers, amounts, dates etc. will stick around in my head for a while. How best to render me useless? Language barriers, date formats, decimals and commas, cross currency transactions.

If I’m looking for a transaction that went out in dollars and came back in Turkish Lira, I have to go and check the exchange rate traded at, and the numbers don’t spring out as fast. Interrupt my work flow and add effort to the mental load, slow me down. It all adds to the stress in the environment, and just saying insufficient data to conclude is really tempting with no overtime or bonus even if it isn’t quite true. Noone checks for lack of evidence, they only check your evidence shows what you say it shows.

If we had infinite resource and time and cooperation, we’d get there in the end, however we don’t. Don’t even contemplate not handing everything over. The court will react badly to you being uncooperative and possibly land you with contempt of court.. The accountants won’t say “we saw a systematic trail of transactions deliberately designed to hide assets”, since that’s something they can’t back up with evidence, even though it’s obvious.

Disclaimer: For those with ethical concerns of a guide on how to deceive the financial world, the bad guys know the above, and more. This is purely for the cynically minded of you who despise your nation’s divorce settlements, and can’t/won’t get a prenup that the courts take seriously. Plus, when she gets feedback from her accountants that they haven’t found anything, and the fees are nearing a few hundred thousand, that out of court settlement looks really tempting, just on your terms, not hers.

[Vacancier Permanent]

Tuth,
amigo, sorry to hear about this for your buddy.
Some great tips and suggestions have already been made in here by others. What I can add to this is, to buy some time so that he can get really well positioned to be in an iron position in which the bitch won't be able to do as much damage as otherwise. I'd tell him to keep it cool with her as if nothing is wrong, forgive her and even be even nicer to her to make her feel that all is ok and that she's got him figured out. While your bro is working magic behind the scenes.

- Tell him, if he can, if he has a high networth and assets, to transfer them overseas to an offshore account in the Bahamas or even better, in Hong Kong. Give him a copy of the Neil Strauss book, Emergency.
- File first as stated above.
- place a video camera and mics in strategic locations throughout the house.
- if he has the means, have him hire a private investigator to follow her every move and report all his findings to you in as detailed and secret manner possible.
- have him to buy one of those pen with a camera and have him put it on his jacket's pocket anytime he gets home where he will be interacting with her to record all conversations/interactions. Better be prepared than sorry!

Once he has overcome all this, do the following to finalize his total transformation into a full blown Red Pill man:
- Introduce him to our forum.
- Take him, just you and him, to an overseas trip, either to join Fisto and Co in SEA or Roosh in Poland/EE, or Wedo in Colombia or if he's into Brasil and Brasileiras, I'll fly down to Brasil to give him the royal treatment there, so that he can finally see the true light as to what's available outside the US.

All the best compadre!

[Ziltoid]

(07-11-2013 06:04 PM)MikeCF Wrote:  

I disagree with the blood testing stuff.

This whole, "I could never raise another man's child," stuff is overblown. Love is love and he is not going to stop loving his son because the son is "not his."

I love my god daughters. If my friend died, I would raise the girls as my own even though my genetic DNA would not be passed on by their living.

Yeah, I agree with this. It's shitty that the lady would lie to him about it being his kid, but if he has raised it from birth then I don't get how you sociopaths on here can imply he's "living a lie" if he doesn't abruptly throw his paternal attachment for the kid aside and let its idiot mother fend for it. As if it's the kid's fault or something?

And, plainly, I've never understood why some people think their stupid genes are so sacred and worthy of being "passed on" or whatever... Yeah OK Darwin, I'm sure you're just a regular Übermensch and the next generation will write you a thank-you letter for procreating those wonderful alleles. "Thanks so much for the brown hair and the predisposition to high blood pressure!"

Your children are a product of the upbringing you give them and the life lessons you provide them, not the chromosomes you blew into their mom.

[The Beast1]

(07-11-2013 06:04 PM)MikeCF Wrote:  

I disagree with the blood testing stuff.

This whole, "I could never raise another man's child," stuff is overblown. Love is love and he is not going to stop loving his son because the son is "not his."

I love my god daughters. If my friend died, I would raise the girls as my own even though my genetic DNA would not be passed on by their living.

The difference in this case is the child is knowingly not yours and you care for them out of the goodness of your heart.

This is just shameful that something so dear like a child is lied to from an individual. I don't know if I'd want to really invest energy in a lie. If she told me honestly or even was a single mom I can pull that off, but a straight up lie is unacceptable.

Your stance makes perfect sense, but this is something on principle that I would take umbrage with. To me, it's like being a woman, getting raped, and having to raise that child. It's just.... icky

[Vaun]

(07-11-2013 08:20 PM)Tuthmosis Wrote:  

Thanks to everyone for chiming in so far. Keep it coming.

I'm making some mental notes of few bullet points to tell the guy to get his juices flowing. Some of the source material (websites, books) might be a little much for him right now, but I'll feel out where he is.

Here are some of my talking points:

1. File first!
2. Don't move out of the house
3. Record everything (written or otherwise)
4. Move and protect assets
5. Save receipts and records for alibis against potential (even likely) false accusations
6. Expect the worst from her (this we all know from being red pill)
7. Angle for mediation
8. Don't have sex with her again (I doubt he would)

keep in mind as with most things he has to make the decision himself, but having a buddy like you at the time of his divorce might save his life.

[Onto]

I have never been married, but I did have a son with a Demonic Bar-Slut who's whole family are lawyers. I can tell you this, when it comes to a man and women, the relationship is a dance....and the dance can turn ugly with each person trying to get at the other. I danced with my son's Mother for the first 7 years and it was hard on him. I eventually had to stop dancing altogether and move away because it was destroying my peace and hurting my son as well.

When one person decides to stop the dance, the other person will up the ante to keep it going. Sometimes in very frightening ways. She has disparaged me to my Son to the point where he doesn't want to talk to me or have anything to do with me. Children will do anything for the love of thier Mother.

I'm sure she will, as most Amercian women, use your son as a weapon agains you. Financially, Emotionally, etc. As hard as it may be, I would suggest he does whatever he can to save himself financially and then walk away and don't look back.

It's easy for me to say this, but if someone were to tell me to do that all those years ago, I would've said they were crazy, but I see know that it was the better decision. It feels good when one stops banging their head against a wall.

However, everyone has their own path, and we often need to go through it, before we can see through it.

Best wishes to him.