On a more serious note: I already agree with a lot of posters, so I'll try to post what has not already been said. So in no particular order:
Foreign Policy: I agree with Fisto's idea. But I would temper it would America not intervening in any foreign conflicts again. I would disband the bases word wide and base national defense on defending the actual borders of the U.S.
I would make diplomats and people otherwise employed in foreign relations to study the most alpha men in history (statesmen) and adopt their mannerisms. Here's a good example of how it would look (
if Obama and Putin were reversed). They would also be required to study game and be proficient with women. America would game the world.
Military:
I would institute a draft for wars in which the U.S. is attacked. In peace time I would require all males to serve in the military (2-3 years). Enough to become proficient with weapons, learn to eat the right foods, become physically fit, and learn how to get things done (operationally).
I would streamline our military force and use the U.S.'s natural landscapes to have a defense similar to Switzerland's. Every houselhold would own guns and know how to use them.
Education:
All feminist, liberal, and humanities programs would be terminated, effective immediately. Anyone who teaches such swill would be summarily executed.
Boys and girls would be educated separately until age of 14.
Boy scouts would be incorporated into the schooling system and mandatory. Boys would be required to either play sports or dedicate free time to learning a skill (playing guitar, learning a new language. Boys would be taught how to do taxes (of which there will be little and I'll get back to that), how to fix cars, how to fight, how to duel, as well as learn from the classics, physics, and mathematics. Effeminate boys would have manliness bullied into them. Teachers would be allowed to discipline children (pain is okay, harm is not). Most teachers would be men. Ethics would be compulsory. Men would be encouraged to sew their wild oats among the world and then marry our women when they get older.
Women would be taught how to cook, sew, massage, how to be agreeable (i.e. not nag), how to support and man instead of bring him down, how to appreciate things, how to stay out of the way, how to be happy with little, poetry, music, and to shame women who get fat or overly bitchy. Most teachers would still be men. Ethics would be compulsory. Women would be encouraged to marry young.
Universities would be divided into trade schools, research schools (for searching for cures to HIV or cancer), or governance schools. Governance schools would be simply to the Confucius Institutions in old China. Governance schools would include people who wish to work in government functions or as legal people such as lawyers. Ethics class would be compulsory. Lawyers would be taught not to just win, but more importantly to fight for what was right.
Police:
The police would be organized around the principle of keeping the peace. That is to say, their job is not to arrest somebody unless that person killed someone. The police would be re-named as peace officers. People in the U.S. would be encouraged to settle small squabbles with themselves and not to bring unnecessary brouhahas to the peace officers.
Another branch of the peace officers would be developed. The detective branch. Their job would be to find culprits of murders and such and keep a watchful eye on the populace to prevent my assassination.
Anyone who attempts to assassinate me will be summarily executed along with their family.
Judicial:
Everyone would have a right to trial by jury. College educated people would be favored as jurors and the juries would be informed of jury nullification.
Judges who are complicity in legal fraud damaging people's lives? Automatic Death penalty. Same for lawyers.
People employed in government functions engaging in corruption? Automatic Death penalty. If the person(s) engaged in such have a lapse in conscience, confess to their crimes and assist in stamping out the corruption, they may appeal the death sentence.
Women who false accuse men of rape? Deported to India for death by gang bang.
I have more, but I have think for a bit.
Wald