[Cruisen_Chubby]

Do you think there could be a possible following for such a thing? Or does a prominant red-pill break up blog exist?

I went through a horrible breakup- absolute shit.

Got very depressed and went through a testosterone building man journey to get to the point where I am today.

Do you think telling my story and offering advice to others (mostly young men) about how to deal with such breakups would be usefull to the manosphere community?

There is a lot on game and relationship management; but I don't feel like there is a lot for rebuilding onesself after a devasting loss/hit to the ego.

Would appreciate the input.

-Chubby

[Therapsid]

(12-27-2012 02:24 PM)Cruisen_Chubby Wrote:  

Do you think there could be a possible following for such a thing? Or does a prominant red-pill break up blog exist?

I went through a horrible breakup- absolute shit.

Got very depressed and went through a testosterone building man journey to get to the point where I am today.

Do you think telling my story and offering advice to others (mostly young men) about how to deal with such breakups would be usefull to the manosphere community?

There is a lot on game and relationship management; but I don't feel like there is a lot for rebuilding onesself after a devasting loss/hit to the ego.

Would appreciate the input.

-Chubby

Yeah. There are millions of beta guys out there aging themselves before their years over girls who dumped them. And unlike with women, there's no safety net of coddling friends to make them feel better or the option of getting picked up by a random chick at the bar.

One topic you could tackle from the get-go is to demolish all the bullshit "How to Get Your Girlfriend Back" scam artists on the web.

[Asaxon]

How to get your girlfriend back? Breaks are great opportunities to get yourself back! A lot of people rediscover their hobbies, interests and self after doing away with a stifling relationship that consumed all their time and emotional resources. A lot of guys I know become more successful, lose weight, build muscle and develop new skills, all prompted by breakups. They usually start things to to occupy their minds and then realize what they were missing due to the "miss" in their life sucking up their time.

[painter]

This is a very good idea. One thing we need to do is expand our audience. Think about it, this forum only has about 5000 members or so while the feminists get huge mainstream exposure.

There was another thread where we were talking about it and that gave me the idea to write a story for blue pill guys to sort of give them an introduction to the red pill. I haven't promoted it here because nobody on this forum needs it, but if you know someone who could use the knowledge here's the link to the e-book:

http://www.amazon.com/The-Red-Pill-ebook...tracker-20

Like I said, I wrote this for guys who don't even know they're doing everything wrong. It's the story of a young guy who gets his heart broken by a cheating girl, fall into oneitis with another and loses her to a player who takes him under his wing.

[RandalGraves]

Solid breakup advice thread from Misc:

Quote:

1. No contact rule: When you first break up, I feel this is a must. Delete the phone number, delete the facebook, get rid of any of her friends which may lead you to snooping on her. This is the hardest part of the process in my opinion and there will be times of weakness where you will grab for the phone, stay strong.

2. Out of sight, out of mind: Delete any photos of you together, any gifts she may have bought you, just anything that reminds you of her. If they are important items you can get away with packing them into a box and sticking them somewhere you will never look, or even give it to a friend to hold onto.

3. DO NOT stay friends: This applies just after the break up, when you still have feelings for her. You will not be able to get over her if you are around her or talking to her. She will just use you as an emotional tampon and use the friendship as a way of checking up on you. When your feelings for her have completely dissipated, then you can THINK of becoming friends, but this is usually after quite a few months depending on the seriousness of the relationship.

4. Listen to your gut: In my LTR I knew when we were done, yet I held on for comfort reasons. You become so accustomed to them being there, you do not want to lose them. To save yourself the pain later down the track, end it when you know it is over. Be true to yourself.

5. Be around people: Breaking up is one of the most stressful times in a persons life, you need people around you for emotional support. Disregard all that alpha, beta stuff from the misc and be true to your own feelings. It is OK to feel like crap for a while, just surround yourself with people who care for you and will listen to you.

6. Accept it is over: She is not coming back, and even if she does because she thinks she has made a mistake, do not take her back. You will know it is done but want that comfort to return, it may in the short term but I guarantee you will be left feeling worse then before if you choose this route.

7. Time heals all: When you first break up you think that she was the one, you will never find somebody like her. In reality you will be thinking this about every girl you are with from here on out. Once the emotions have time to settle, you will realise her downfalls and pick things which you didn't like about her. Everyone always moves on and is happy, all it takes is time, don't rush it.

8. Avoid alcohol: I know many people drown their sorrows in alcohol, but it is actually a depressant and you will find that you end up feeling worse then when you started. So try and avoid drinking your issues away.

9. Be aware of her games: Your ex will most likely monkey branch onto someone else, as females have a bit of an issue with being alone, they are always seeking male validation. This is where the out of sight, out of mind principle pays off. Do not stalk her facebook, delete facebook altogether if you have to, as when you see this you will most likely be crushed. But remember, she will eventually have to deal with what has happened and go through the same emotional torment you are now. This is usually when she realises that her new guy is just a replacement and comes crawling back to you. DO NOT BUDGE!

10. Avoid the revenge mentality: No matter how bad the break up was, regardless if she cheated or whatever, try and avoid doing things for revenge. By all means focus on improving yourself, but do it for YOU, not so you can show her how you have improved. This revenge mentality makes the feelings last a lot longer as you are binding yourself to her, without even realising.

11. Accept the emotions you will feel: In the time immediately after a break up, you will be swamped with different emotions. You will miss her like crazy, you will feel like you messed up, you will feel angry at her, angry at yourself etc etc. Take these emotions and turn them into something positive, in this case in the gym. Use the rage, use the hatred, spur yourself. These emotions will pass, just give it time.

12. Talk to other girls: Creating new friendships with the opposite sex after the break up can take your mind off things, but be careful in how you approach it. I personally don't feel it is a good idea to go out with the mentality, bang everything in sight, as it can set you up for failure. Just enjoy the company.

13. It is all hormones: It may seem cold, but all you are feeling is due to hormones. Love is literally like a drug, the act of validation from a person you have an emotional connection with releases what are known as "feel good" hormones (I wont bore you with the science). When you break up, you no longer get this "fix", this is why you become desperate to get her back, you are going through relapse. You have to fight it, like you would drug or alcohol addiction, this is why we delete the numbers and facebook. Keeping her contact details within reach is like an alcoholic keeping drinks lined up in-front of them. We all know how it will end.

14. Dating outside strict religions does not work: If you are thinking of committing to a girl who has a strict family who is adamant she dates within her religion/race, do not go there. In the beginning the excitement of going behind her parents back will excite her, this fades, and both of you will feel quite guilty. The relationship is destined to end.

15. There are only ever 2 options: When you begin to date someone, there is only ever 2 options. You will either 1. get married (not likely) or 2. break up (very likely). Just remember this when entering a relationship, can you honestly see yourself living with her for the rest of your life? I didn't think so.

[Cruisen_Chubby]

(12-27-2012 04:05 PM)painter Wrote:  

This is a very good idea. One thing we need to do is expand our audience. Think about it, this forum only has about 5000 members or so while the feminists get huge mainstream exposure.

There was another thread where we were talking about it and that gave me the idea to write a story for blue pill guys to sort of give them an introduction to the red pill. I haven't promoted it here because nobody on this forum needs it, but if you know someone who could use the knowledge here's the link to the e-book:

http://www.amazon.com/The-Red-Pill-ebook...tracker-20

Like I said, I wrote this for guys who don't even know they're doing everything wrong. It's the story of a young guy who gets his heart broken by a cheating girl, fall into oneitis with another and loses her to a player who takes him under his wing.

Did you write this?

Also- If I were to purchase it but do not have a kindle; would it just send me a .pdf?

I'm always down for a good read, especially if it supports a forum member.

[Cruisen_Chubby]

I have scoured the interwebs for a solid red pill break up blog or a oneitus cure for alphas and betas alike; but I have failed to find one.

In a nutshell, I started dating a girl whom I believed to be the "love of my life" or "the only one for me". You guys know how that goes.

Letting myself turn into a beta piece of shit I got my heart broken. I put on weight. I lost friends. She ended up with another guy I knew pretty well. I'd see it in public. My image was shit. etc.etc. etc. Depression and resentment ensued.

4 years later I own my own business, have fucked over 100 girls in the interrim between then and now, worked part time as an athletic model, will graduate with honors, have a very solid group of friends with great connections, have lived abroad, traveled extensively, and acquired a general love for life and people.

I feel that if I were to have discovered a blog or a mapped out recovery guide like the one I am contemplating constructing; I believe my results would have been expedited.

As mentioned before; females get coddled and nursed back almost instantly. Us men, have nothing; no one.

I want to provide these young men (possibly older divorcees as well) a safety net as well as a light at the end of the tunnel.

During the break up stage you do not necesarily need to stomach the "red pill" right away; but moreso discover oneself and become the man you should have been all along. Which, may or may not be, what the red pill is (in essence).

This is no MRA or MGTOW bullshit who hate on women or bitch about how unfair marriage is. It will be noted, but not harped on.

I just hate seeing great men fall and never get back up.

What do you guys think?

[painter]

Cruisen_Chubby: Your story is exactly why I wrote the book. I don't know if it's a break up or oneitis "cure" but it illustrates both of those scenarios and shows a guy getting out of it. I wrote it to place red pill information directly into the mainstream by using a fiction piece that shows a nice guy getting beat down (if you read the preview you see he takes it to the extreme). Even though it's called The Red Pill, I don't use those terms in the story or very much PUA lingo, the focus is really on self improvement and living for yourself. It's not very long and there's a good twist at the end. The story actually wound up with a lot of unintended symbolism that's pretty fitting.

You don't need an actual Kindle to get any Amazon books, you can download a Kindle Viewer for free onto any computer, Ipad, smartphone etc. Just google Kindle Viewer and whatever you're using and download that, then synch the viewer to your Amazon account, shouldn't take more than a few minutes. I've been getting a ton of Amazon books on my computer since I got the Viewer, they look great and read well.

Definitely let me know if you get it, I'd like to hear your thoughts. Your post was exactly why I wrote it, to help save the guys coming up behind us a lot of time and frustration by giving them a short story to read instead of trying to tell them what you know or sending them to different websites where they may or may not understand it. This way they can read the book and get into the manosphere on their own.

[kdolo]

Because relationships and attraction actually have a biochemical basis, breakups cause pain on a biochemical basis as well:

in other words you suffer from withdrawal ......similar to a drug addict or alcoholic trying to kick a habit .....

so remember that most of what you are going through is simply a phase of the withdrawal. It hurts, but it is part of the process .....after 4-6 months, you should be near completely cured.

[kdolo]

""15. There are only ever 2 options: When you begin to date someone, there is only ever 2 options. You will either 1. get married (not likely) or 2. break up (very likely). Just remember this when entering a relationship, can you honestly see yourself living with her for the rest of your life? I didn't think so.?"

Really, there is only ever 1 option. Even if you get married the odds of divorce are high. And even if you dont actually divorce, the relationship will change..... ....

So essentially, ALL romantic/sexual relationships come to an end..... - even though you may still be in each other's live's......they end. Accept this at the outset and enjoy all the goos moments to the max.

[Cruisen_Chubby]

(12-27-2012 06:43 PM)painter Wrote:  

Cruisen_Chubby: Your story is exactly why I wrote the book. I don't know if it's a break up or oneitis "cure" but it illustrates both of those scenarios and shows a guy getting out of it. I wrote it to place red pill information directly into the mainstream by using a fiction piece that shows a nice guy getting beat down (if you read the preview you see he takes it to the extreme). Even though it's called The Red Pill, I don't use those terms in the story or very much PUA lingo, the focus is really on self improvement and living for yourself. It's not very long and there's a good twist at the end. The story actually wound up with a lot of unintended symbolism that's pretty fitting.

You don't need an actual Kindle to get any Amazon books, you can download a Kindle Viewer for free onto any computer, Ipad, smartphone etc. Just google Kindle Viewer and whatever you're using and download that, then synch the viewer to your Amazon account, shouldn't take more than a few minutes. I've been getting a ton of Amazon books on my computer since I got the Viewer, they look great and read well.

Definitely let me know if you get it, I'd like to hear your thoughts. Your post was exactly why I wrote it, to help save the guys coming up behind us a lot of time and frustration by giving them a short story to read instead of trying to tell them what you know or sending them to different websites where they may or may not understand it. This way they can read the book and get into the manosphere on their own.

Perfect!

I guess I have a similar goal in mind- but would go about it in a different way; we could collaborate a bit on certain themes.

Don't get me wrong- I am no longer in that stage and have fully digested and accepted the red pill. I would consider myself living proof of the motivation that can come from a heart breaking.

I have a busy week and weekend coming up. But I will get the viewer and give your book a read. How long is it?

[painter]

Yeah, your story is like the perfect illustration. The basis of my idea was just about getting it out there so we can increase our numbers. I see what you're saying, stuff like that list you posted is excellent.

The book was like 120 pages on my computer but ithe Kindle shortens it to around a 100 pages I think....

[TheCaptainPower]

I lived with a bitch who moved out on me...I listened to Michael Bolton for about 2 weeks, until I decided to start working out hard again...

6 months later I got into the best shape of my life and started getting laid like a rockstar...

Sometimes getting dumped is that best thing that could ever happen to u...