Quote: (12-21-2012 10:19 AM)thegmanifesto Wrote:
Quote: (12-21-2012 05:08 AM)XXL Wrote:
As for how to do it.. I game without getting visible signals of interest. But when I make a move she complies and that's my cue.
We chat. She doesn't show she's attracted. I do my thing. I trust that what I do is right. I stay chill. I don't push or rush. I play with how much I give her so she experiences contrasting feelings about me [does he like me? did I do something wrong? but damn he almost kissed me..]. The curiosity is planted. She gets a bit confused about me and that's exactly where I want her to be, that invisible anticipation keeps the interaction fresh and exciting. So she's not visibly into me but not indifferent either. On the surface it's kind of flat/neutral. It looks like two people chatting, having fun conversation, nothing too fancy or impressive and next thing you know they look like they're together now [it's like how BF/GF behave in public, they don't molest each other or act super excited but they stay close and you can tell they're together].
So how do you do all that in a loud nightclub?
Or is this just a date thing?
That looks like it would take a lot of patience.
Again, patience isn't one of my strong suits.
Thanks for your replies so far.
I feel you man, I’m not too patient person at all, I’m told very often that I’m energetic high tempered guy. But all my best results came from respecting the time factor. Besides, I’m very attracted to the girls I focus on so I really enjoy spending time with them and don’t want to pump asap and dump asap.
My way is quite universal and applicable anywhere [nightclubs/dates/social circle/work/school/family bbq] and good for any country [except for California/Nevada girls, those probably need more dickhead attitude to drop that hardcore wall of bitchiness].
The format is stupidly simple. Talk to the girl/whole group using
positive/negative expressions. Endure silly reactions/provocations, stay neutral [not defensive, not offensive]. Get physically comfortable in each others space and don't escalate more in public. Escalate hard and pull the trigger in privacy. All of that + time = intimacy.
In a nightclub..
I approach the whole group in a friendly manner with lighthearted easygoing vibe. I embrace that initial cold shoulder and frame it as funny/cool/silly/original/etc. I give every girl the same amount of attention at first. It looks like we already know each other. I add subtle physicality right off the bat while I’m talking [like hand on shoulder] just to get them familiar with me. As we’re interacting I ask boring questions to figure out logistics [I decide now whether to stay with them or leave]. We talk shit, have fun, play stupid games, I compliment them, I call them out, it’s never ending positive/negative [nothing over the top, rather within “it’s appropriate” bracket]. It comes off natural when you have a good time. I escalate a bit more just to get the girl I like physically comfortable with me. I still flirt and pay attention to her friends. She gets familiar and comfortable standing very close to me, dancing with me, sitting in my lap, etc. Occasionally I do few bold/impressive moves [subtle kiss/pick her up/slap her ass/etc] just to show her that I can, but for the most part I stay at comfort level. I kill time with them, I purposefully don’t move the interaction forward cause there’s no need to. I leave the venue with her friends at the end of the night so I go with the girl to her place when they split . Or her friends leave us completely alone in the venue so we can leave together later.
In the meantime
I might leave them and come back later even a couple of times during the whole night.
If it's dancefloor I like to dance solo for 2-5 minutes having a blast and then include invite chicks. It's cool to watch how girls get closer to you when they see you have more true fun on your own without needing anyone. They move towards you, they're already opened [without actual approaching, freaking magic].
With random single chicks at smoking area etc it's as simple as "ha! that shit will kill you.. don't worry I will survive.. until life will kill me.. shit, i guess we're on the same path.. but we don't even know each other, it can't be like that! what's your name? [cold shoulder] what's wrong, language barrier? it's fine, you're right we don't have to talk.. you can listen as I unleash my awesomeness on you.. haha.." talk shit, bring her to her friends.
On a date..
Very similar. I stay chill, don't push or rush, have a good time, fuck around, appreciate AND tease, keep the physicality at "being comfortable in each other space" level and only from time to time use bold expressions like verbal ones.. "you're so cute i'm so cool our kids will be awesome let's go make them some now" or physical ones.. kiss, neck kiss, picking her up, dancing and groping each other, etc. But the whole interaction in general has the "unanswered question" vibe.
So because I play with how much I give her, the girl gets confused and she's not sure what to expect. The curiosity is planted. She experiences contrasting feelings about me [does he like me? did I do something wrong? but he almost kissed me..] and that's exactly where I want her to be. That's her whole fun, to keep on figuring the guy out, to keep on guessing what's next.
So comfort is there due to time spent together. And tension is more like anticipation. It's like watching a movie with a lot of twists in the plot which makes it exciting to keep watching to the very end since you have no idea how it will end. Besides I'm patient to do all that stuff cause I hang out with girls I'm very attracted to that I want to see again. So I enjoy all that mating dance cause, damn, having tall beautiful graceful stylish girl next to you is very pleasurable.
Key points:
# Patience is key. It sucks but it’s so important. Patience is the fastest road to intimacy. This is due to girl’s nature. Girls get interested/excited/turned on with time. You know, that buying temperature shit, they’re like volume knob [not on/off]. When I start rushing and pushing I compromise the time factor and she likely to get defensive and wary. It makes things go 10x slower cause when she’s closed she’s CLOSED and no seduction can take place then. But when I take my time and let her warm up to me and open her up to let my game influence her then I can move it forward and pull the trigger when she’s ready for it.
# Invisible game. I don’t get obvious signs of interest from the girl like her getting all bubbly, clapping hands loudly, jumping up and down on my sight, getting all over me, etc, you all that giggly attraction cues. 1st sign of her getting really attracted to me is when she gets quite stiff and self conscious, kind of like 15 year old boys usually behave next to very attractive girl next to them. 2nd sign is simply her compliance to my physical moves, when I take her by the hand she submits, it means it's going well.
# I fly under the radar so much that I almost crash. That means..
+
I join the group and give equal attention to them all. If it's 2 girls I do the same thing to both of them for example if I take hand of one girl I take hand of the other girl as well [it's not weird mechanical thing cause I make it cool... "oh shit you girls are so strong we should hug right now like rugby players do before the game [take their hands put them on your nape and proceed to hug together]".
+ I open with totally unimpressive things like "how's your night going? you look boring, oops i mean bored, not really..." and carry on.
+ I don't fight fire with fire, I embrace girls' the skepticism/standoffishness with chill calm vibe, I say "it's ok, it's fine, you can hate me, don't worry you're not THAT bitchy after all" [positive and negative expression again]
+ I don't molest/grope/escalate much or kiss passionately in public, if it gets hot I usually say "not here".
+ I don't steal girls from the group to finger/fuck her in the dark corner, I leave with them at the end of the night.
+ I don't do anything over the top/impressive/flashy so I'm not labelled as player. That's why the method is good in every social situation.
+ In general my interactions look rather unimpressive, everything happens between the verses.
At least that's what I do. Works better at attractive girls.