[Mrs. Chocolate]

First: This guy was one the more hansome at the club. He sat in my table for no reason known and we chat a bit. We danced a bit and then... I thought... "This scenario is a bit lame... Why not?"

Dialogue:

- I think you are cute.
- Me? You need glasses.
- I am good in the way that I am.
- So, are you seeing someone?
- I am seeing a girl, but she is far away from here. (trying to pretend a relationship)
- Okay. IMO, seeing a girl is just seeing, but it is just me saying.
- I am too player for you. (In port: Eu sou vida loca demais pra você)
(No, he is not. Even if he tried to do so... lol)
- You don't know me. Anyway, you could just said no in the first place.

Turn away to the dance floor with my friends.

I know guys love to post sucessfull approaches and pictures of girls gamed, but... As you can see, I am not sucessfull at all! Lol..
And, direct game, as I could experience with Brazilian men does not work. Seriously. Ends up badly.

[kimleebj]

(02-15-2012 08:54 AM)Mrs. Chocolate Wrote:  

Turn away to the dance floor with my friends.

direct game, as I could experience with Brazilian men does not work. Seriously. Ends up badly.

You could have persisted. Men can be confused or shocked by direct women because you are not following the usual script where the man pursues. They might think you are just teasing.

If you really want him sexually, then don't turn away and never return! After a couple songs, you could lean in and tell him to sit down with you and have a drink. Do not ask him, be firm! Then tell him you want him to take you home to kiss. Make it unmistakably clear that you are serious, and he faces no chance of rejection.

[WestIndianArchie]

Trying it once and failing does not mean that direct game does not work.

[Caligula]

Not sure there's much of a lesson here. The dude approached you, you gave him some attitude and he decided it wasn't worth pursuing further.

[speakeasy]

(02-15-2012 11:41 AM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

Trying it once and failing does not mean that direct game does not work.

This.

[Alfonzo]

I think you are cute... you seem hesitant right at the start here . Your not convince .
Secundo you ask if he is seeing someone . For me it would be annoying . It's like a police
interogatoire. You can just go see him,smile and be seductive but not with a shitload of question .

[soup]

I thought girl game was just about being hot.

[Moma]

I find it implausible that Mrs Chocolate cannot get men in Brazil. Unless, she lives in an area where they don't prefer chocolate.
If she grew up in my area in London or even if she lived in Toronto, brothers would be hollaring like wolves.

However, if she seeks my vanilla cousins, she may need game, yes.

[Jalouse]

This is amusing because it seems to me that you blew him out, he makes a cocky statement 'I'm too much of a player for you' and rather than coming back with something fun you take it seriously and say something to make it awkward then turn your back on him and dance with your friends.

Just shows you can't rely too much on what a woman says for what she's actually thinking.

[esperar]

Mrs Choco, are you ugly? I'm not asking to be mean, I'm asking because I'm confused as to why you can't get guys.

[Parlay44]

Bitches don't need any game. All they have to say is ...Blowjob?

Nothing personal Mrs Chocolate but I thought this was a boys' club?

[Samseau]

Mrs Chocolate isn't ugly, she's just a woman who pursues men out of her league and wants a way to get them.

[Moma]

(02-15-2012 12:56 PM)esperar Wrote:  

Mrs Choco, are you ugly? I'm not asking to be mean, I'm asking because I'm confused as to why you can't get guys.

Nah she ain't. Roosh doesn't allow ugly women on his forum.

[esperar]

(02-15-2012 01:08 PM)Moma Wrote:  

(02-15-2012 12:56 PM)esperar Wrote:  

Mrs Choco, are you ugly? I'm not asking to be mean, I'm asking because I'm confused as to why you can't get guys.

Nah she ain't. Roosh doesn't allow ugly women on his forum.

I'd like a picture of her to judge the goods.

[iknowexactly]

BIG PROPS to anyone, especially a woman, who steps up and tries.

To try to be helpful without whining, as guys learn: one of Roosh's best sayings is something like "Numbers game is the only game."

At least you tried, and I'm not saying this to put you down, just reality-- one guy is not even a a significant start--; to even START getting results with people you have to do at least one A DAY, of maybe 3 per week at least-- perhaps for months before you get anywhere.

If you don't approach frequently enough, you forget what you learn, it's like trying to practive the violin one hour a month, you'll never improve fast enough.

I think it's great you tried-- start trying out responding to different cues--the efficiency of approaching guys who are already checking you out is way higher than randomly approaching, and I disagree that you should be real persistent with a particular guy, you should be persistent in the numbers you approach. That's the opinion of my father, who sold insurance door-to-door during the Great Depression-- try doing THAT with approach avoidance.

The guy that sat down with you-- in North American culture that's almost too forward-- a guy who was interested would open you if he wanted to talk to you-- not just sit down.

Learning which cues mean something in your culture is important. It reduces the punishment ration of opening uninterested people.

[Menace]

I think women's direct game should be based on Compliment & Cuddle. BTW, most approaches go nowhere. Not sure if women are prepared to deal with that psychologically.

[Pilgrim37]

Try 2 guys next night,then 3 the next noite and so on.
You will get a result guaranteed.

As he said...numbers game!
Just make sure you hit the handsome numbers.

[Caligula]

I think you guys are misunderstanding, Mrs Choc was the one to get approached as I read it (first line of dialogue was the dude).

[Hotwheels]

My natural reaction to a woman being very forward with me is to devalue her. Kinda odd, but I guess that's fairly normal for a lot of guys. It's quite possible that may have happened here.

If he initiated by sitting at her table it sounds as if he was interested. Probably got spooked by a broad spitting "guy game" at him.

[Amour Fou]

(02-15-2012 08:54 AM)Mrs. Chocolate Wrote:  

And, direct game, as I could experience with Brazilian men does not work. Seriously. Ends up badly.

Oh, so the problem is with "Brazilian men"? Suuuure...

(02-15-2012 01:05 PM)Parlay44 Wrote:  

Bitches don't need any game. All they have to say is ...Blowjob?

Haha, I laughed!

---

Ms. Chocolate, you didn't seem to persist much with this guy. The moment you felt that you dropped your bait and he retreated a bit, you backed off. You didn't seem to play your part on the "back and forth", maybe out of some fear of exposing yourself even more, things guys do all the freaking time.

Anyhow,

I admire girls that know how to flirt and be direct without being slutty. I mean, I don't mind slutty, but they are a different category to me, they are just quick fixes as I see, not something to put much thought in.

As I see it, the best way a girl can be direct is by being funny and dropping a compliment. That is the best way a girl shows interest while keeping her charm.

...and I am indeed assuming you are a "good girl" Ms. Chocolate, for you don't come off as "vida louca" ("crazy/wild") in no way, much to the contrary. The guy there was probably right about you... If you have that vibe even online, imagine so in person?

Food for thought.

Keep up the good work...

[ccurtis189]

(02-15-2012 08:54 AM)Mrs. Chocolate Wrote:  

First: This guy was one the more hansome at the club. He sat in my table for no reason known and we chat a bit. We danced a bit and then... I thought... "This scenario is a bit lame... Why not?"

Well... were you one of the more beautiful women at the club?

[Tigre]

(02-15-2012 08:54 AM)Mrs. Chocolate Wrote:  

- I am too player for you. (In port: Eu sou vida loca demais pra você)
(No, he is not. Even if he tried to do so... lol)

Just taken on the words, there's no reason to give up there. But if you felt he was being completely dismissive with non-verbal cues, fair enough.

Is there any reason you couldn't keep the conversation going?

Ask him follow up questions about how much of a player he really is. Get him qualifying, or at least telling you stories. Express skepticism sometimes ("hmm, your friends seem kind of normal to me")

Even if he shows disinterest now, why not terminate with something upbeat? Leave things hanging.

Remember that one hour from now, he has a couple more drinks under his belt, that group of hot girls he was focused on has already left, and the guy-girl ratio has worsened (from the guy's point of view).

It's completely possible he comes back to you again but with a better attitude, if he sees you as the sure thing.

[hydrogonian]

Mrs. Chocoloate:

First of all: awesome. Nice attempt, seriously. It takes balls to go direct (no offense, ahem ) and even starting off with "you're cute", while not full on purely direct (to some standards) is an amazing start. You have to crawl before you can walk, and I think that my first direct line was telling a girl that I thought she was "cute". I banged her that night, but that was more of a fluke than due to my skill with direct game.

Keep going with it, and keep thinking about being direct in your daily life. The thing about it is that it takes a while to integrate into your personality. It takes thinking about always being direct, over a period of time, to effect a personality change.

This "personality integration" I have found is more important than direct lines. From a guys perspective, the direct mindset does more to crush, and I mean compeltely obliterate, anything that isn't incredibly alpha in your personality than it does in terms of providing effective lines. Is that what you want as a woman? I'm not sure. But if the aggressive approach is what you feel will help your game, then this is the way that you want to go.

One thing that you will have to work on, however, is plowing through initial rejection. The key to this is that your "state"" won't noticeably change when you get rejected. If a guy turns you down, work on not having a negaive reaction, either with your body langauage and facial expression, or with what you say. Pretend that it didn't happen, or choose to reinterpret it as a non-rejection, and keep being direct. Perk up, if possible. That confidence is incredibly sexy and will lead to your ultimate success, even after an initial rejection.

[Mrs. Chocolate]

Whoa, so many responses!
First of all, thank you.

@Amou Fou: Direct game has not been working since this is the not the first time I do this because men think you want sex IN THAT MOMENT as fast girls think that any approach can be a potential boyfriend. This desmotivates a lot. As was told over and over, women's brain works in a different way. Sometimes, we are interested, but we didn't think about sex right away. We are in that moment... Intrigued.
I don't want to be a crazy life girl, I don't need that. LOL.

@HotWheels: My natural reaction to a woman being very forward with me is to devalue her. Kinda odd, but I guess that's fairly normal for a lot of guys. It's quite possible that may have happened here.

See? This is the attitude that sometimes I find in some men. Sad, huh?

Yes, I may had gave up too soon, but his body language was not helping at all. He clearly was not interested, but had no balls to say it and kept giving negs, we chatted before the dialogue, as you forgot... about the venue, the songs, and the like...the small talk was gone...
Anyway, I will keep doing it. And more important: without a drop of alcohol.
And no, I was not the cutest girl at the wall. I never am. But, the guy was one of the cutest. I know it would be hard to convince aaaaaand I thought: Okay, I am not with him anyway. Let's confirm this.

[Spike]

No offense chocolate girl, but when a beautiful girl walks straight up to me and started direct gaming me i would assume its a prostitute. The guy probably got scared or didn't know how to react to a situation like this. You should have tried one more time.

I have been 7 weeks in Brazil and had quite a few Brazilian girls and only one approached me directly which ended in a SNL within the hour. She had a beautiful face and was mixed Brazil/Lebanon but was packing some extra pounds.

- I am too player for you. (In port: Eu sou vida loca demais pra você)

I just put the Portuguese version on my facebook wall, lets see what happens haha.