I'm in an open LTR (I'm 23 She's 21) and I've soaked up as much game/red pill knowledge as I could and try to apply those principles to my relationship.
However, there's one habit she has that's really annoying that I can't figure out. Whenever I pass judgment on anything she makes it about her. Like to a ridiculous extent.
Examples:
Me: I don't like babydoll shirts. I think they look like tit-drapes.
Her: Would you like how they looked on me?
Me: No. That's why it's good you don't wear them.
(Keep in mind I've never seen her wear one of these. She doesn't have one in her wardrobe, and she wasn't wearing one at the time.)
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At times she'll ask when it is about her, but it'll be completely redundant.
Me:You shouldn't wear those kind of shoes. I don't like it when girls wear those kind of shoes.
Her:Do you like it when I wear those kind of shoes?
Me: No. That's why I just told you not to wear them.
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Examples like the following are what really confound me.
We were watching MSNBC and their was a guest host whom I didn't care for.
Me : This replacement host sucks. He's completely uninteresting. Why would this bland dude have this high status position? If I were in charge of NBC and I could hire someone for 6 figures, it wouldn't be this guy. That wouldn't be the type of guy I would hire.
Her: Would I be the type of person you'd hire?
Me: No, and can we get the conversation off of you. I'm trying to talk about national TV personalities.
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They are so numerous and mind-numbing that I often just ignore them or tell her that isn't a righteous question and it's stupid. (Patrice)
FYI: She's not asking them in jest, she asks them seriously and is emotional about it, like she's scared to hear the answer cause her self esteem is riding on it.
They question is why is she hyper-personalizing everything to an absurd degree. She's emotional but she isn't the narcissistic selfie-taking type American girl. She just turns every judgment I make about anything into a question about how I feel about her.
I'd understand (I'd still think it was dumb but at least I'd know the 'rationale') if it were only for things that would be relevant to our relationship. Things like the last example throw that off though and makes me think there's something wrong with her. It's a red-flag but I don't know what's wrong or if this is normal behavior.
Any insight?
Also what should I do to stop this? I'm considering putting her on timeout and not talking to her for a couple minutes everytime she does that.
Timeout has worked for other problems that have arisen in the relationship. But this issue is so prevalent and common she'd go back to timeout in half a minute of talking.
TL; DR
Girlfriend turns every judgement/comment I make about something into a question of if I feel that way about her. She does this with no regard to the subject matter of the original judgement/comment.
However, there's one habit she has that's really annoying that I can't figure out. Whenever I pass judgment on anything she makes it about her. Like to a ridiculous extent.
Examples:
Me: I don't like babydoll shirts. I think they look like tit-drapes.
Her: Would you like how they looked on me?
Me: No. That's why it's good you don't wear them.
(Keep in mind I've never seen her wear one of these. She doesn't have one in her wardrobe, and she wasn't wearing one at the time.)
_____________________________________
At times she'll ask when it is about her, but it'll be completely redundant.
Me:You shouldn't wear those kind of shoes. I don't like it when girls wear those kind of shoes.
Her:Do you like it when I wear those kind of shoes?
Me: No. That's why I just told you not to wear them.
___________________
Examples like the following are what really confound me.
We were watching MSNBC and their was a guest host whom I didn't care for.
Me : This replacement host sucks. He's completely uninteresting. Why would this bland dude have this high status position? If I were in charge of NBC and I could hire someone for 6 figures, it wouldn't be this guy. That wouldn't be the type of guy I would hire.
Her: Would I be the type of person you'd hire?
Me: No, and can we get the conversation off of you. I'm trying to talk about national TV personalities.
_________________________________
They are so numerous and mind-numbing that I often just ignore them or tell her that isn't a righteous question and it's stupid. (Patrice)
FYI: She's not asking them in jest, she asks them seriously and is emotional about it, like she's scared to hear the answer cause her self esteem is riding on it.
They question is why is she hyper-personalizing everything to an absurd degree. She's emotional but she isn't the narcissistic selfie-taking type American girl. She just turns every judgment I make about anything into a question about how I feel about her.
I'd understand (I'd still think it was dumb but at least I'd know the 'rationale') if it were only for things that would be relevant to our relationship. Things like the last example throw that off though and makes me think there's something wrong with her. It's a red-flag but I don't know what's wrong or if this is normal behavior.
Any insight?
Also what should I do to stop this? I'm considering putting her on timeout and not talking to her for a couple minutes everytime she does that.
Timeout has worked for other problems that have arisen in the relationship. But this issue is so prevalent and common she'd go back to timeout in half a minute of talking.
TL; DR
Girlfriend turns every judgement/comment I make about something into a question of if I feel that way about her. She does this with no regard to the subject matter of the original judgement/comment.