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4 year old single mother.. need input.
09-26-2012, 02:06 PM
There's a 34 year old single Asian girl at my workplace that has a 2 year old child. She’s 10 years older than me but she looks fairly young due to Asian genetics. I definitely find her attractive. She has a petite figure with some really big titties.
When I used to work in the same department with her, we always subtly flirted with one another but I never made any moves because it was too risky sitting in a cubicle right next to a woman I'm sleeping with. Since she moved to a different department, I no longer see her as much but we still chat on our workplace instant messaging application from time to time.
She wants me to go hang out with her and her son this weekend at the National Zoo but I haven’t given her a concrete decision yet. I've already met her child and I know that the baby daddy is living somewhere in the West Coast (I live in the Northern Virginia/DC area). With the son being extremely young, I don’t think me being in their life at this stage would be a significant impact but that perspective could certainly be flawed.
Does anyone have advice in regards to dealing with single mothers, as to what risks and things to watch out for? I just want to make it clear that I don’t want a long-term relationship with her and that is something I will let her know from the get-go. We are simply at two different points in our lives but I’m always down for something casual and fun. I’m not sure if she feels the same about my previous statement but I’m obviously not going to tell her that until I smash.
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4 year old single mother.. need input.
09-26-2012, 02:11 PM
She's not stupid, considering she's both 34 and a single-mother. She knows you're 24 and probably not going to get involved in an LTR with her.
That being said, it's strange that she's initiating your first hangout with the child rather than just get a babysitter.
I would reply something to the effect of "why don't you just get a babysitter and we'll go out for drinks instead later that night?" Based on her response to that, it will give you a little more clarity.
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4 year old single mother.. need input.
09-26-2012, 03:11 PM
Just tell her you're busy during the day but free in the evening if she'd like to catch up for a drink. If she says she can't just say "too bad, maybe another time then". It will be clear to her you aren't comfortable being around the kid and she will decide she'd rather have your company anyway and will probably reinitiate on her own.
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4 year old single mother.. need input.
09-26-2012, 04:09 PM
Thanks for the feedback guys.
I spoke with her today and the zoo trip may be canceled. Whatever.
I'm going to try to isolate and hang out at her house. I think she wants me to put a little bit of work in, hence why she's asking me if I wanted to chill with her and her son. Basically just to see if I'm a good guy.
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4 year old single mother.. need input.
09-26-2012, 09:08 PM
I would never lead a single mother on, but hey that's just me.
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4 year old single mother.. need input.
09-26-2012, 10:47 PM
asking you to hang out with her son on what is essentially a first date is weird. single moms are usually careful about letting their kids meet the guys they date, to avoid the confusion of children meeting a bunch of dudes who are just flings.
so as others suggested, I would suggest meeting up for drinks at night, and if she can't do it, I don't think it is worth the effort.
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4 year old single mother.. need input.
09-27-2012, 10:51 PM
Fuck. That kid is going to be fucked up. You know if she's inviting you out for a first date with the kid, she's already done it with several other men. The kid is already probably desensitized. Man I hate mothers like this.
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4 year old single mother.. need input.
09-28-2012, 12:47 PM
Maybe she was just testing you. Maybe she never planned to follow through with the zoo date. It's possible that she just wanted to see how you would react when she suggested it.
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4 year old single mother.. need input.
09-28-2012, 01:10 PM
Under normal circumstances I think a first date with a kid is totally bizarre, but OP and the single mom have been coworkers and cubicle buddies for quite some time, so I don't think it's weird in this case.
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09-28-2012, 07:31 PM
^ Yes, she feels she knows you good enough to bring her kid around. You can be nice and let her know you're not looking for a relationship so she can't get mad after y'all bang,
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4 year old single mother.. need input.
09-29-2012, 08:37 PM
I've been using direct game more because I've known her for about 10 months now and she seems receptive to it. I asked her yesterday to hang out with me but she said she couldn't. She's playing hard to get.. preserving whatever value she has left to offer.
I'm not too pressed about getting her considering the situation. I think she may feel a little uncomfortable being with someone 10 years younger than her. She probably knows I won't be committed to a long term relationship and she may be looking for more security than anything because she's getting older now. On a sidenote, it's rather amusing seeing the old and middle aged men at work try to spit game at her.
If this one fails though, then oh well. There will be more opportunities for better girls.
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4 year old single mother.. need input.
09-30-2012, 11:07 AM
I've dated/banged many MILFs and it's really rare that they want you to meet the kid even briefly on a first date.
Most of them take pains to keep their guys away from the kid so the kid doesn't see a parade of guys that the mother is having short term flings with to satisfy her emotional and sexual needs. That is just good parenting.
What this chick is doing is inappropriate and when you add in the fact that she works for the same employer, you are asking for trouble on two different fronts. I would just fade out contact with her. Plenty of other girls out there-you don't need to get involved with her.
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4 year old single mother.. need input.
10-02-2012, 11:20 AM
This reminds me of the time the broad brought her 9 month old to a hotel meetup.... Couldn't get a sitter. hah
Yeah, I banged while the kid slept in his car seat next to the bed.
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4 year old single mother.. need input.
10-02-2012, 10:49 PM
Quote: (10-02-2012 03:02 PM)IQVX Wrote:
Quote: (10-02-2012 11:20 AM)Hotwheels Wrote:
This reminds me of the time the broad brought her 9 month old to a hotel meetup.... Couldn't get a sitter. hah
Yeah, I banged while the kid slept in his car seat next to the bed.
It can be worse.
Banged a 21 year old mother of an 18-month old who slept in a crib in the same room right next to us... and her mom terminally ill with cancer (which she told me after) slept in the next room over.
I think the worst I've done is the baby on the floor while we use the bed.
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4 year old single mother.. need input.
01-16-2016, 06:47 AM
Been searching for a thread like this for a while. Basically my situation as follows....
Started a new job and there is this hot blonde single mom. She is friendly and we have flirted back and forth via work instant messenger, few months back on a work night out we were flirting (bit of kino, loads of eye contact) and she starts stroking my leg under the table, anyway like a dupe i froze and didn't push it forward.
Now I have no problem gaming chicks in bas/clubs and can open sets for fun. But each time i see this girl at work i go into full on panic mode and can't think straight let alone try to game her (when it should be the easiest thing ever). Anyway out of deperation/idiocy I privately messaged (not at work) her asking her out for a coffee (tried to keep it low key) and well she has not responded. I saw her at work and I'm pretty sure she got the message and has read it, but don't know what my next step should be.
Have I completely fu***d this up?