The paradox of being a player is that typically you're self sufficient. I don't need a woman for anything on a day to day basis. I can cook, clean up, buy clothes..

Getting chicks to do things for you is a great way to build your "hand" within a relationship. Like compliance testing is crucial in the short game, but when your timeline is elongated, what do you make her do for you that you already do for yourself (and probably do better)

WIA

I've noticed that I don't ask women in my life to do stuff, even most of my relatives. I just do it myself, as you say.

But I realize now that one of the greatest gifts that I can give to a woman I am intimate with is telling her to do stuff for me.

Women like to serve their man, and they like to be led by a man that knows what he wants and isn't afraid to ask for it (and who isn't afraid to let her go when she isn't cooperating).

And although I have a younger sister who I'm used to commanding since childhood, I just never grew up with male role models that did things like that on a regular basis.

I would ask my girlfriends to do things for me in a passive way (as in "can you get that for me?" ending my sentence as a question), but very rarely. And I think that's because I was afraid of being too pushy, which as well all know leads to a loss-aversion mentality.

Meanwhile, I finally noticed that the guys I remember in my life who had attractive women in their lives (From middle school through college) tended to be more verbally commanding and orderly.

The moment this revelation hit me the hardest was when I read an anonymous post online written by a self professed feminist, who had a boyfriend that would tell her to do all sorts of little things:

"Get my phone for me."

"Grab me a soda from the fridge on your way there."

She was asking why she was conflicted by the fact that she liked being told what to do by her boyfriend even though she felt it was anti-feminist. Although hypocritical feminist behavior wasn't new to me at that point, that's when I realized I was missing out on something very useful!

These days I've always been more of a "physical" leader (escalating, hand holding, body language), and even in my "beta" days, somewhat of a "relationship" leader (starting and pushing difficult conversations that she would rather ignore, setting my boundaries, planning dates, breaking up first most of the time). But now I believe it's time for me to finally let myself become a better verbal leader. I almost feel like I've been holding back this part of my manhood all this time for fear of offending a woman.

I think making my commands more stern by removing my "ending on a question mark" habit, as well as saying "please" at the end of my commands would work for me. I'd love to hear other opinions on this.

My current harem has 2 (trying to increase).
#1 - does the dishes or helps cooking at my place (see this funny thing that happened last year - thread-29217...pid1090661)
#2 - cooks at her house and brings it to my place, or that she cooks for me when I come.
I also ask her to buy us theater tickets once a quarter (which she does).

"Take off my shoes."

Plates - I never ask for anything besides coming over in sexy lingerie, bringing something for me to use on her. Occasionally maybe a beer, which never happens anymore. If anything I asked to get stretched out or get a massage. I don't want them thinking anything else besides besides being sexual.

Mini-LTR's/LTR's - On top of the above, I might have them get stuff I need if I'm at work, if I'm doing some house chores, I'll have them have a hand in it. I'll ask them to grab things for me around the house. They might go shopping for me also, if I need something specific. Specifically my last LTR wasn't afraid to pay for stuff we did.

It's not often that I ask chicks to do things for me, at least not here in the US. No matter how I ask - politely, offhandedly, using commanding tone, they give me attitude, usually in the form of a "do it yourself!" look.

However, and this is a big however, my experience outside of the West showed me something entirely different. Asking a filipina "bring some food for me" gets you a 3 course meal of rice, veggies, beef, eggs, and mangoes... all cooked by herself. You try to help with the cooking, she fends you off telling you to relax.

Now this gets me thinking - what can I do to maximize my time and make efficient use of it when I become location independent? Household stuff takes time. That's time I can spend working on my business. Preparing meals, doing laundry, folding my clothes, cleaning the house... that's time spent that I don't get paid for. I want to outsource that time to a non-Western girl who has shown a willingness to do those things, without a hint of attitude, so I could focus on making more money.

So, it boils down to the tasks that takes time to do, but doesn't earn you money or prevents you from doing the things that you really want to do. Those are the tasks that I would ask a chick to do for me.

Coconut oil massage (with HJ happy ending)
Cutting my nails and cuticles
Popping zits on my back (disgusting I know)
Scrubbing my back in the shower
Cleaning dishes if I cook
Trimming my neck nair for touch ups
Laundry

To be fair I usually do most of the cooking and do reciprocate with the massages (with happy ending)

Quote: (02-25-2016 02:36 PM)CleanSlate Wrote:  

It's not often that I ask chicks to do things for me, at least not here in the US. No matter how I ask - politely, offhandedly, using commanding tone, they give me attitude, usually in the form of a "do it yourself!" look.

However, and this is a big however, my experience outside of the West showed me something entirely different. Asking a filipina "bring some food for me" gets you a 3 course meal of rice, veggies, beef, eggs, and mangoes... all cooked by herself. You try to help with the cooking, she fends you off telling you to relax.

Now this gets me thinking - what can I do to maximize my time and make efficient use of it when I become location independent? Household stuff takes time. That's time I can spend working on my business. Preparing meals, doing laundry, folding my clothes, cleaning the house... that's time spent that I don't get paid for. I want to outsource that time to a non-Western girl who has shown a willingness to do those things, without a hint of attitude, so I could focus on making more money.

So, it boils down to the tasks that takes time to do, but doesn't earn you money or prevents you from doing the things that you really want to do. Those are the tasks that I would ask a chick to do for me.

If you're in a place like SEA, hire a maid.

Def get mine to trim up my neck and shape up my hair in the back as well. Goes well with a back scrub in the shower

Get her to cook for me or if i'm cooking for her i'll have her run to the store on her way over and get something to go with the meal, just to have her contribute something, or have her pick up some beer/wine

Back massage after the gym

Laundry :tu

Pick me up if i'm too smashed to drive home

Bring some movies if we're gonna just be hanging around on the couch

One point to consider is that the more slave-like you can treat your woman, the more of an indication that you could probably date a much higher SMV woman.

I'd rather date an 8 that I struggle to get to treat like a slave, than a 5 that will do anything I ask her to.

Quote: (02-25-2016 04:55 PM)RatInTheWoods Wrote:  

One point to consider is that the more slave-like you can treat your woman, the more of an indication that you could probably date a much higher SMV woman.

I'd rather date an 8 that I struggle to get to treat like a slave, than a 5 that will do anything I ask her to.

Why do you want to struggle with a woman ?

I'm not interested in dealing with females that don't help or complement my life.

I've had an 8 that was willing to do things for me, didn't have to fight her on everything, and she enjoyed doing those things for me as well.

Quote: (02-25-2016 10:23 AM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

when your timeline is elongated, what do you make her do for you that you already do for yourself (and probably do better)

This is something I have experimented with.

My girl does most of my cooking and most of the shit is great.

I let her try her hand at searing steak for me though and decided that was one thing I couldn't delegate.

Massage - I'm vastly better at massages than any of the girls I've dated, but they are willing to take direction and can help me. I also reciprocate on this.
Popping zits on my back - I reciprocate for the girl if she's got a blackhead or something. Doesn't bother me in the slightest, but I draw the line on the girl farting or other crude things.
Scrubbing my back in the shower - This always feels good.
Cleaning dishes - Rarely. Current girl isn't all that great at it, but she tries.
Laundry - I don't have her do it, but I occasionally have her help me by stripping the bedsheets or helping me fold/hang stuff up.
Cooking - She's always willing to cook but she's not that great at it.
Cleaning - To some degree, don't make her clean up after me though.
Buying groceries/stuff I need - Yep, but she probably offers more than I ask
Dressing a certain way
Buying and bringing me food
Sewing projects
Creative type projects

Girls I'm not dating:
Bringing me small things
Massaging me
Filling up my water bottle when they go to fill theirs
Getting me free drinks when we're out.
Winging me (if I'm single)
Buying me drinks in exchange for massage

In my experience, girls will often default to being domestic in ways they think will please you if those expectations are already a part of your life. Start with something simple and go as far as you'd like.

An example, I make my bed every day. Once she sees that it was made when she got in, this sets the standard. I typically wake up early and, as the last one out of the sheets, she will get dressed and then make my bed for me. I'll playfully swat her butt and say thank you or that I liked that she did it. From then on, she knows she can snooze a few more minutes, but she has this task to complete before she leaves. But I don't think this habit ever follows her to her house. I'll get a full body mirror photo the next day- with her bed visible in the background- and it's always a total mess.

Within a short time, the "can I" questions come out- if she knows you don't eat restaurant food very often- "Can I cook you dinner/breakfast this weekend?"; if she knows you like to go see live music- "Can I buy those concert tickets for us?"

To be fair, I don't mind spending money in return on a girl that tries her best, but it will be things that are fun, memorable, and interactive. I rarely buy dinner and/or a night of drinks more than once month, if that. Those dollars are forgotten almost as quickly as they are spent.

My Colombiana 8 offers me the following in a typical day.

1. Mandatory morning blowjob to allow me to think clearly throughout my work day.

2. Makes me breakfast of 4 eggs / one whole wheat piece of toast and coffee as soon as blowjob is completed.

3. Packs my lunch to take to work.

4. Clips my toenails / nails while I soak in the tub with Epsom salt after a heavy workout session

5. Gives me a full body luffa scrub and hair wash in the shower

6. Gives me a massage before sleeping while I send out last barrage of work emails

Although I am a much better cook than her; she is always willing to try to cook Colombian cuisine for me but the empanadas and bonuelos are way too carb and fat heavy so I have her stick to grilling chicken and fish for me.

Misc items:
Put my socks on if I am running late while having breakfast
Preparing my next day work clothes on the hanger to expedite
Giving me a second blowjob after breakfast if I am feeling particularly stressed.
Making sure my place is tidy and dishes are washed and put away

Quote: (02-25-2016 05:27 PM)kaotic Wrote:  

Why do you want to struggle with a woman ?

I'm not interested in dealing with females that don't help or complement my life.

I've had an 8 that was willing to do things for me, didn't have to fight her on everything, and she enjoyed doing those things for me as well.

Because I'd rather bang an 8 then a 5 and get my socks washed and bacon cooked.

You could get a 10 if you have an 8 being a slave for you, you are not realizing your SMV is my point.

Higher SMV chick > than having a slave do mundane tasks that take little time, IMHO

Quote: (02-26-2016 11:51 PM)RatInTheWoods Wrote:  

Quote: (02-25-2016 05:27 PM)kaotic Wrote:  

Why do you want to struggle with a woman ?

I'm not interested in dealing with females that don't help or complement my life.

I've had an 8 that was willing to do things for me, didn't have to fight her on everything, and she enjoyed doing those things for me as well.

Because I'd rather bang an 8 then a 5 and get my socks washed and bacon cooked.

You could get a 10 if you have an 8 being a slave for you, you are not realizing your SMV is my point.

Higher SMV chick > than having a slave do mundane tasks that take little time, IMHO

Agreed. I honestly don't understand guys that just keep around women post bang to do their chores for them; that's what maids are for

Good thread. I'm finding that you MUST give a girl things to do. They are genetically programmed to want to help you, you just have to bring the programming out in them. You can start small "grab that remote for me," "can you wash those dishes etc"

My small list:

wash dishes, cook me something from your country, translate this from (their native tongue) to english, and listen to this artist and give me your opinion.

Quote: (02-25-2016 10:23 AM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

The paradox of being a player is that typically you're self sufficient. I don't need a woman for anything on a day to day basis. I can cook, clean up, buy clothes..

Getting chicks to do things for you is a great way to build your "hand" within a relationship. Like compliance testing is crucial in the short game, but when your timeline is elongated, what do you make her do for you that you already do for yourself (and probably do better)

WIA

A plate just finished cooking for me earlier and cleaning my kitchen. She also cleans my bathroom.

I'll make plates go food shopping for me. Run to starbucks. Pick up dinner if we get takeout.

If a girl isn't already getting waxed then that's a must-do.

Sometimes I give them books to read - fiction, not like cookbooks.

If we go out, she must wear a sexy outfit and heels. No exceptions short of a broken ankle.

If I am focused of fulfilling my reason for being (or perhaps a major tasking) and some daily minutia (cook, clean, laundry, food shopping, fix my surf shorts, get tickets, check dates/times, make an appointment, go to the store to buy a part that I need for a task, put sun tan lotion on my back, or other basic logistics) pops up, the woman who is helping me fulfill my purpose (LTR) naturally steps in and takes care of the little things so I can focus on the bigger ticket items. She is indirectly inspiring me, especially if she is doing it with a smile on her face. These women are few and far between. At the next level, women who inspire me to romance, I may ask them to assist in basic tasks (which include some of those from the above list) assuming that she can do them without being a drag on my time (physically or mentally) because it can free me (by decreasing the time it would take me to normally do it alone) so that I may use the time to do things that I consider of higher value (not what she considers higher value). The key difference here is that I need to ask her, whereas before this was not necessary as she just did it (with a smile). The less that I need to ask of her to do things and the more positive that she is about naturally doing them is one of my indicators that she can move from the wannabe toward LTR territory. Women who inspire me only for sex, I ask nothing ; but I imply that they need to look sexy. Whom who fail to inspire me receive zero attention.

In the end I can do everything myself and I have; but I have learned over the last decade that a woman can potentially add more value to my life than I previously thought.

Nothing more than asking for a light for my smoke.

http://www.thegmanifesto.com/2011/05/the...-time.html

Just as I take license to ask for big favors to make up for things I do for her if asked.

Women tend to ask for big favors in return for the smallest things. I don't ask women to do any tasks for me in my life unless it's my mother when I'm home.

Quote: (02-27-2016 12:06 AM)Prince of Persia Wrote:  

Quote: (02-26-2016 11:51 PM)RatInTheWoods Wrote:  

Because I'd rather bang an 8 then a 5 and get my socks washed and bacon cooked.

You could get a 10 if you have an 8 being a slave for you, you are not realizing your SMV is my point.

Higher SMV chick > than having a slave do mundane tasks that take little time, IMHO

Agreed. I honestly don't understand guys that just keep around women post bang to do their chores for them; that's what maids are for

Some of these comments make me wonder if you guys have ever experienced a woman truly submitting to you.

What makes this situation desirable is not necessarily the easy mundane tasks that are being taken care of. It's the fact that she is submitting to your will, no matter the task at hand.

BJ while driving down the highway? "Yes daddy."

Clean my floors and cook me my post-workout meal? "Yes daddy."

Banging an 8 or a 9 is often a one-time gimmick. A dime a dozen. Modeling a 6 or 7 to submit to your will and complement your life is a much more fruitful undertaking than simply having a slightly better vagina to drain your balls into.

You'll understand this once you've experienced it.

Quote: (02-29-2016 08:36 AM)Designate Wrote:  

Quote: (02-27-2016 12:06 AM)Prince of Persia Wrote:  

Quote: (02-26-2016 11:51 PM)RatInTheWoods Wrote:  

Because I'd rather bang an 8 then a 5 and get my socks washed and bacon cooked.

You could get a 10 if you have an 8 being a slave for you, you are not realizing your SMV is my point.

Higher SMV chick > than having a slave do mundane tasks that take little time, IMHO

Agreed. I honestly don't understand guys that just keep around women post bang to do their chores for them; that's what maids are for

Some of these comments make me wonder if you guys have ever experienced a woman truly submitting to you.

What makes this situation desirable is not necessarily the easy mundane tasks that are being taken care of. It's the fact that she is submitting to your will, no matter the task at hand.

BJ while driving down the highway? "Yes daddy."

Clean my floors and cook me my post-workout meal? "Yes daddy."

Banging an 8 or a 9 is often a one-time gimmick. A dime a dozen. Modeling a 6 or 7 to submit to your will and complement your life is a much more fruitful undertaking than simply having a slightly better vagina to drain your balls into.

You'll understand this once you've experienced it.

Fuck telling her to do things. If you've truly made her submit she'll do all the above without asking. I refuse to ask a girl to do anything for me unless it's of her own accord. You have to train her to do things for you unwarranted.

A girl who has submitted will know your schedule like the back of her hand and she'll act accordingly. As your schedule should be the most important thing in her life if she's invested.

When a woman is doing lower value tasks for you, she is submitting. She is saying I am willing to do these things for you because I recognize that your purpose (or attention on other things) has more value. She does these things because she wants you to keep here around. Girls want to be with men who do what they (the man) want, when they (the man) want, without apologies or explanations. He is following something (his purpose) and she does not have that sense or drive, so she submits to him. The more she does this without being asked, the more submissive she is.

Quote: (02-28-2016 09:59 PM)NASA Test Pilot Wrote:  

If I am focused of fulfilling my reason for being (or perhaps a major tasking) and some daily minutia (cook, clean, laundry, food shopping, fix my surf shorts, get tickets, check dates/times, make an appointment, go to the store to buy a part that I need for a task, put sun tan lotion on my back, or other basic logistics) pops up, the woman who is helping me fulfill my purpose (LTR) naturally steps in and takes care of the little things so I can focus on the bigger ticket items. She is indirectly inspiring me, especially if she is doing it with a smile on her face. These women are few and far between. At the next level, women who inspire me to romance, I may ask them to assist in basic tasks (which include some of those from the above list) assuming that she can do them without being a drag on my time (physically or mentally) because it can free me (by decreasing the time it would take me to normally do it alone) so that I may use the time to do things that I consider of higher value (not what she considers higher value). The key difference here is that I need to ask her, whereas before this was not necessary as she just did it (with a smile). The less that I need to ask of her to do things and the more positive that she is about naturally doing them is one of my indicators that she can move from the wannabe toward LTR territory. Women who inspire me only for sex, I ask nothing ; but I imply that they need to look sexy. Whom who fail to inspire me receive zero attention.

In the end I can do everything myself and I have; but I have learned over the last decade that a woman can potentially add more value to my life than I previously thought.

This is beautiful, simply beautiful.