Tonight I found out about the untimely passing of a girl I've been banging.
Out of respect, I will keep this post as clean as possible. This is really bothering me, so please do not mistake my candor for coldness.
The relationship was strictly sexual. Thinking about it, I figure I got together with her on 7 separate occasions. The last time was two Thursdays ago.
She and I had no real emotional connection. I'd known her about 4 months. We had sex within 4 hours of meeting. Because of that, and her incredible fellatio abilities I had the feeling that although she was only 23, she'd she'd been around the block, and I treated her accordingly. After our initial meeting the sex sessions we had were very hard. She seemed to really enjoy them, so I believe our relationship was certainly mutually pleasurable.
I'm sure some of you have dealt with similar situations. There are two things I am concerned about, and I hope you guys can give me some advice:
1)I kept the communication completely sexual. The last time I talked to her was this past Thursday. We talked about getting together when she was off work at 2 a.m. By then, however, I had found another girl to sleep with. I ignored her call, but did send a sexually charged text message. She answered back quickly, and said we would get together the next night, at which time she would be performing oral sex upon me.
Friday night I called her at 11 p.m. I assumed she was busy working but left a voice mail that referenced the promise she made the night before. After not hearing from her by about 2:30 I called again, this time with some booze in my system. That message was extremely explicit. I reminded her of the powerful orgasms I'd induced via conventional and anal sex, and expressed my interest in doing this again. Early the next night I left one more that clearly referenced her job as an Exotic Dancer.
All of these calls rang multiple times before the voice mail kicked in, leading me to believe the phone was on. I know I left my first name in all three calls. In the 2:30 a.m. call I left my other cell phone number because the battery on the normal one was gonna run out.
Tonight I learned that while swimming, an aneurysm ruptured in her brain and she drowned early Friday morning.
She was from the mainland, and had moved to Hawaii several years ago to go to college. She gave up on that, and took up dancing. During the limited conversations she and I had, I know she was leading her parents to believe she was still in school. They were not at all aware of her job, which she said they would seriously frown upon.
A friend of hers, who I called, talked to her dad today. Her body will be sent to her hometown tomorrow. She rented the pool house of a decent size owner-occupied home. She was swimming in that pool at the time of her death. The owner of the house is making arrangements to have her belongings packed and shipped later in the week.
Do you guys think the phone company would be able to give her parents access to her voice mails? Would it immediately become their property and the could just call in and change the code? I called Verizon and they said they couldn't until a death certificate was present, but you never know if they have a cop or a lawyer call?
I just called the phone from a blocked prepaid and it still rings all the way through, and it's still her voice on the greeting. I've been to the place she lived to bang her, and right when we were done she hooked her phone to the charger. I left when she fell asleep at about 5 a.m. Since she was up swimming early, and its still on, I bet that thing is still sitting there attached to the charger.
I don't want to talk about illegal activities, but what do you guys think if I just go over in a couple of hours and explain the situation to the homeowner, and see if they'll let me go in and delete my voice mail?
2) Should I do something for her family?
Regardless of anything these people lost their daughter. On top of that their finding out about her dancing and having to hear about all that shit. This is Hawaii, someone needs to send them a little Aloha.
Should I send flowers to the funeral? Let's say they do listen to the messages. Do they really want to see a big bouquet from the guy on their daughter's phone calling her a slut and telling her to get over here and suck my dick after she's freaking dead?
Her friend I talked to tonight said that at some point the girls (and probably their shitbag boyfriends in their goddamn ghetto drift cars) from the club would get together and have a little memorial party. This girl was above those people, and I refuse to go to some shitty barbeque with a bunch of strippers in the daytime to honor her. That's an insult.
Maybe I'll offer to have the party at my house? She wasn't working at the classiest of places, but did for a year. I wouldn't mind having those girls over, but even the classiest dancers are a different animal in the daytime. Do I want a bunch of strippers and their shitbag boyfriends parking their Nissan Sentras with loud exhausts on my grass? Then knowing where I live on top of that?
What if I go get a money order and make it out to the girl herself or "to the family of" and send it to her parents in a sympathy card I don't sign with no return address?
Is the best thing to do to just say fuck it and just forget about the messages, flowers, and party and just keep my mouth shut and my thoughts to myself???
Mahalo in advance for your advice. I really don't know what to do, and I can't sleep over it.
Aloha!
Out of respect, I will keep this post as clean as possible. This is really bothering me, so please do not mistake my candor for coldness.
The relationship was strictly sexual. Thinking about it, I figure I got together with her on 7 separate occasions. The last time was two Thursdays ago.
She and I had no real emotional connection. I'd known her about 4 months. We had sex within 4 hours of meeting. Because of that, and her incredible fellatio abilities I had the feeling that although she was only 23, she'd she'd been around the block, and I treated her accordingly. After our initial meeting the sex sessions we had were very hard. She seemed to really enjoy them, so I believe our relationship was certainly mutually pleasurable.
I'm sure some of you have dealt with similar situations. There are two things I am concerned about, and I hope you guys can give me some advice:
1)I kept the communication completely sexual. The last time I talked to her was this past Thursday. We talked about getting together when she was off work at 2 a.m. By then, however, I had found another girl to sleep with. I ignored her call, but did send a sexually charged text message. She answered back quickly, and said we would get together the next night, at which time she would be performing oral sex upon me.
Friday night I called her at 11 p.m. I assumed she was busy working but left a voice mail that referenced the promise she made the night before. After not hearing from her by about 2:30 I called again, this time with some booze in my system. That message was extremely explicit. I reminded her of the powerful orgasms I'd induced via conventional and anal sex, and expressed my interest in doing this again. Early the next night I left one more that clearly referenced her job as an Exotic Dancer.
All of these calls rang multiple times before the voice mail kicked in, leading me to believe the phone was on. I know I left my first name in all three calls. In the 2:30 a.m. call I left my other cell phone number because the battery on the normal one was gonna run out.
Tonight I learned that while swimming, an aneurysm ruptured in her brain and she drowned early Friday morning.
She was from the mainland, and had moved to Hawaii several years ago to go to college. She gave up on that, and took up dancing. During the limited conversations she and I had, I know she was leading her parents to believe she was still in school. They were not at all aware of her job, which she said they would seriously frown upon.
A friend of hers, who I called, talked to her dad today. Her body will be sent to her hometown tomorrow. She rented the pool house of a decent size owner-occupied home. She was swimming in that pool at the time of her death. The owner of the house is making arrangements to have her belongings packed and shipped later in the week.
Do you guys think the phone company would be able to give her parents access to her voice mails? Would it immediately become their property and the could just call in and change the code? I called Verizon and they said they couldn't until a death certificate was present, but you never know if they have a cop or a lawyer call?
I just called the phone from a blocked prepaid and it still rings all the way through, and it's still her voice on the greeting. I've been to the place she lived to bang her, and right when we were done she hooked her phone to the charger. I left when she fell asleep at about 5 a.m. Since she was up swimming early, and its still on, I bet that thing is still sitting there attached to the charger.
I don't want to talk about illegal activities, but what do you guys think if I just go over in a couple of hours and explain the situation to the homeowner, and see if they'll let me go in and delete my voice mail?
2) Should I do something for her family?
Regardless of anything these people lost their daughter. On top of that their finding out about her dancing and having to hear about all that shit. This is Hawaii, someone needs to send them a little Aloha.
Should I send flowers to the funeral? Let's say they do listen to the messages. Do they really want to see a big bouquet from the guy on their daughter's phone calling her a slut and telling her to get over here and suck my dick after she's freaking dead?
Her friend I talked to tonight said that at some point the girls (and probably their shitbag boyfriends in their goddamn ghetto drift cars) from the club would get together and have a little memorial party. This girl was above those people, and I refuse to go to some shitty barbeque with a bunch of strippers in the daytime to honor her. That's an insult.
Maybe I'll offer to have the party at my house? She wasn't working at the classiest of places, but did for a year. I wouldn't mind having those girls over, but even the classiest dancers are a different animal in the daytime. Do I want a bunch of strippers and their shitbag boyfriends parking their Nissan Sentras with loud exhausts on my grass? Then knowing where I live on top of that?
What if I go get a money order and make it out to the girl herself or "to the family of" and send it to her parents in a sympathy card I don't sign with no return address?
Is the best thing to do to just say fuck it and just forget about the messages, flowers, and party and just keep my mouth shut and my thoughts to myself???
Mahalo in advance for your advice. I really don't know what to do, and I can't sleep over it.
Aloha!
