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Torn between my ideal woman and the need for strange - will likely choose the latter
11-28-2018, 05:26 AM
Growth, to play devil's (dick's?) advocate for a bit, <whynotboth.png> !
A woman is typically not with you so that she's your woman, she's with you so that you're her man. In other words, most women wouldn't care about stepping out as long as the man continues to provide safety, security and support.
Of course, a big part of that is emotional security. This is why discretion is key. More importantly, an expert will usually stick to SNLs, tinder or the like, ideally in another city or town. No side chicks, fwbs ie no emotional investment in anyone but your main.
Now, I'm not encouraging you or anyone to do that. It's simply an option that's open. Whether it's the best option or not depends on your specific circumstances including moral stance, stage in life, frequency of wanting strange yada yada
The philosophical side of the question/thread is a whole other animal with ecellent points from everyone so far
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Torn between my ideal woman and the need for strange - will likely choose the latter
11-28-2018, 06:40 AM
Speaking as an older man (40) if you found a good woman in this day and age and if you're an older man yourself, I would stay. Those feelings and temptations will never go away, no matter what you do or who you're with, you just need to take a step back and think about what you really want for your future and resist the temptation. If she's an all around good girl but missing some things, talk to her about it. If she really loves you, she'll change for you.
If you're on the younger side, I say go after more tail and gain more experience.
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Torn between my ideal woman and the need for strange - will likely choose the latter
11-28-2018, 04:30 PM
Having gotten married young (in final year of college) I really thought that I was setting myself up for financial success because I wouldn't be distracted by chasing tail. What I didn't count on was that we would age and grow in different directions. Myself, I became more extroverted as I became established in my career, while she shrunk away from public gatherings. You really never know what is going to happen down the line and I really try to keep this in mind going forward. After 20 years of lowered expectations of physical intimacy, and fulfilling interactions, encountering women who were nice, and happy and horny was a welcome change.
Originally at the end of my marriage, I thought I was going to be a man-whore because I thought it was just the Physical Affection part I was missing. But when just female friends "filled my love tank" with the other love languages even platonically I realized how I was shortchanging myself. i quickly realized the value of a caring attentive woman in addition to looks. I think I levelled up here with the latest one, and I can be content to pull out of the race, because I have proven to myself that I can attract, convert and retain top talent if that ever needs to happen again. I used to scoff at the serial monogamists. That is until I became one...
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Torn between my ideal woman and the need for strange - will likely choose the latter
11-28-2018, 09:59 PM
Didn't rollo speak on the fact that the biggest redpill sticking points is a woman will never love you the way you want her to love you. I read A LOT of Robert Greene and he even speaks on this saying love attacks our narcissistic inner selves. I know this forum hates him but many people say something similar.
Men need companionship, but this urge for companionship can ruin a man the same way his urge to get alot of women can ruin him. The key is balance. I've seen empty men on both sides of the coin, both envious of the other.
A man dying of thirst watching another man drown.
Personally I the idea of marriage and settling down completely scares me. My goal is to be a proud single father of warrior like kids. WIth that said EVERY PERSON has his own unique and beautiful views on life that stem from years and years of living it. Nobody here can tell you the best thing to do, especially with the little information you gave.
My advice, however, is to look at the cons of both sides, pay close attention to confirmation bias. Once you feel confirmation bias come in, be the devil advocate for a while. Understand what you're getting yourself into. and good luck
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Torn between my ideal woman and the need for strange - will likely choose the latter
11-29-2018, 06:14 AM
Men don't need companionship, they need purpose.
