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Cape Town 2018

Cape Town 2018

The old datasheet required an update so I thought I would give this a makeover before tourist season starts here.

Consider this a collated version.

Misc info

This map is of Cape Town central.

There are also other cool areas to go out such as Observatory (Obs) or Woodstock but it’s more dangerous.

Green: Logistically best places to stay, apartments and backpackers/hotels. Waterkant is fine too, the 5* hotels are there and in Camps Bay.

Blue: Tourist stuff + crime intensive areas.

Brown: Hot women congregations. Shout out to Woodstock as well as Southern Suburbs.

[Image: W6W6tzR.png]

This satirical map does a good job of explaining the stereotypes of each area:

[Image: jMpXytg.jpg]

Current exchange rate & Costs

1EUR = 16.7ZAR
1USD = 14.32ZAR
1GBP = 18.43ZAR

It’s really cheap to have a holiday here when you’re coming with any of the above currencies.

Shopping for clothes and tech is expensive due to customs.

Double Gin & Tonic/Vodka & Soda: R60 – 90
Cigarettes: R30 – 45
Meal for 2: R300 – 1000 depending on establishment etc.
Bottle of wine (liquor store): R40 – 1000; ~70 – 150 for a good bottle of quality red (merlot/pinotage/cab sav/cape blend)
Bottle of wine (restaurant): R120 upward
Uber: R25 basic fare, R8 per km after that.
Gym membership: R650 – 800
Apartment, rent: R5000 per person minimum. Studio/bachelors in town go for R12K – R20K
Internet: R850pm for 20Mbps
SIM Card and Data: R149 for 1GB, R249 for 2GB. One of the most expensive places in the world. You will need a SIM card and the main providers are Vodacom, MTN and Cell C. Telkom has the best Data bundles though.

Tourist Stuff

There are countless things to visit in Cape Town which all visitors come for. Table Mountain, Robben Island, The Wine Route, Cape of Good Hope, safaris, Shark Cage Diving and the list goes on. I would suggest taking the Red/Blue tour buses to see a lot in one day. Tickets are R180 – 380 and gives you a decent starting point. There’s also paragliding, walking tours etc.

Hermanus is great for whale watching (September), Gaansbaai for shark cage diving (June - September), there's skydiving up the West Coast too. Boulders beach for penguins and the list goes on.

Here's a list to get your feet wet.

I might host an Airbnb experience when I get a chance (i.e. where to get laid).
Be wary of beggars and car guards. Car guards will look after your car where you park and generally expect a tip when you return.


Plenty of great, affordable restaurants. This place is known for its red meat and wine.

Wine is extremely cheap given the quality as it’s in abundance. You should definitely visit some wine farms. Especially if you have a group of girls.

Hit up TripAdvisor and take it from there. Ask girls on Tinder. Be creative.

Women – General Overview

The quality of women fluctuates depending on summer or winter as foreigners descend on Cape Town from November – April.

There are a lot of modelling agencies here. A lot of girls here are good looking (7+) and most of them keep in shape, it is a very important thing for them.

Plenty are spoiled, as mentioned by others elsewhere, and like to consider themselves high maintenance.

Local girls are harder as they are more conservative but if you open them you just gotta keep the ball rolling. Not used to being opened.

The quality here is really high and this has been echoed by other RVF members who have come down. The difficulty is also quite high (also backed up by other members) due to Cape Town’s cliquey nature. You need game.

Foreign girls that come here are usually hot, you can tell the nationalities generally speaking. It's the younger interns and students/volunteers who are single, a lot of couples come here too.

Lots of MILF, trophy wives etc. who are easy. The younger girls are into jocks, hipsters and generally decent looking guys with a good sense of style. Presentation is important in CT.

I repeat, lots of MILFs who are really hot and easy, if that's your vibe. The 'Constantia Moms'.

Women by Category/Race

White – in the areas you will go out to, you will mainly see white women. They are exceptionally hot and mainly of English or Afrikaans origin.

Afrikaans girls are my personal favourite as they are the classic female archetype of feminine, looking to please their men, conservative etc. Most importantly, they are drop dead gorgeous.

Most white girls here are also difficult to hook up with as they are in their cliques and you will need to approach groups, at night. They are open during the day but remain somewhat skittish. That being said, it’s definitely doable, depending on the location and time and they are my bread and butter.

The problem I have with these women is that they went to all-girl schools which means their flirting skills are poor (improving when drunk). Guys here have zero game (all-boys schools) and thus end up hitting the gym 24/7 to be in best shape.

Girls naturally view this as ‘top of the food chain’ and you will see them gravitate to these kind of guys.

So if you have game, it’s pretty powerful if you get an in.

The single ones socialize in town and all around the brown areas.
The taken ones are in suburbia and you will find them at the malls.

Colored – The hottest colored girls are the Muslim ones as for some reason or another, they take more meticulous care of themselves. Probably due to the fact that they have more money than the non-colored girls.

They really dig white guys but I rarely see them with black guys (cultural reasons). Generally easy but also cliquey. They will give you much more ‘in’s and leeway on you dropping your game as they are pretty down to earth. Usually come from ‘good’ families and can be conservative on the outside but that disappears once they warm up to you.

They can be found in Kloof, Bree and Long St or Camps Bay (brown areas minus Green Point).

Be wary of the guys they are with, they will start shit with you if they don’t like you.
The guys respond well to some jokes, banter and discussing football (soccer to our friends on the other side of the Atlantic).
Most gangsters here are colored.

The majority however are in the Southern Suburbs as that’s mainly where they live.

I personally love colored girls, really down to earth, easy going and real. When they're hot, they're super hot and as such know it. Big fish in a small pond syndrome.

Black – Black girls here are not as beautiful as the ones in Johannesburg, personally. I think it’s a Xhosa vs Zulu thing.

The older ones are pretty cliquey and the younger ones are ‘woke’; it’s just a generational thing. Don’t let it discourage you though, they are down to earth, easy to approach, curious and plenty of fun.

Very stylish and like to be pretty open with their sexuality.

They also stick to very specific places such as Observatory (students), Kloof St (Asoka/Yours Truly), Long St and Bree.

I still prefer JHB black girls as they are hotter, easy-going and down for whatever. They take better care of themselves, in my humble opinion.

Students/foreigners/interns/volunteers – There are plenty of Americans, Dutch, Germans, French etc. who are in Cape Town.

They hang out literally everywhere above (town mainly) and their headquarters is Observatory due to the age group, logistics and cheap outings.

They are easy and here for a limited amount of time, very receptive to game etc.

Also in groups but more manageable. Apply regular approach as anywhere else with travelers.


Yeap, this is serious business. I have been fucked over multiple times.

- Don’t speak to anyone who looks dodgy or friendly in town, when walking from place to place.

- Assume you are being watched at all times.

- Hide your valuables, don’t flash any jewellery or phones; this includes when waiting for your Uber.

- Don’t take rides, don’t entertain people who are trying to help you at ATMs or in any place.

- Be wary of kindness.

Petty crime is big here but the more dangerous stuff is in the Cape Flats and generally outside the City Bowl i.e. you won’t get stabbed but you might get your shit stolen.

Be careful at night at: Long St, Bree St, Loop St, some areas of Green Point and all of Obs, Woodstock and don’t go to Salt River at night. This covers city bowl.
Basically, use common sense. A lot of Nigerians will ask you if you want drugs etc; don’t engage as they will rob you. Sometimes kidnappings happen too.

You probably won't die though. I know guys who have been sucker punched and woke up naked in a township. It's life.


Uber, uber, uber. I use uber for everything. Uber Black is really cheap too (R40 odd starting).

Should you want to venture out of town (and you definitely should), I would highly suggest renting a car. It is relatively cheap and it makes life a lot easier as it alleviates you of the paranoia of public transport. Be wary of the high deposit required (as per another RVF member confirmed - khalidkcl).

MyCiti buses are frequent and safe though; a good starting point but honestly, uber is so cheap that it’s a no brainer.

Avoid minibus taxis and trains at all costs. Too dangerous if you’re not a local and moreso if they hear an accent.

Racial Composition (from old datasheet)

According to wiki:

• Black African: 38.6%
• Coloured: 42.4%
• Indian/Asian: 1.4%
• White: 15.7%
• Other: 1.9%


• Black Africans: 50%
• Coloureds: 20%
• Whites: 30%


Airbnb has taken over and this will be more costly compared to other things. The locals are onto the buzz and charge premium rates. It’s still relatively inexpensive vs overseas and it’s a small price to pay for a good pad, logistics and security.
Make sure you get the whole apartment/house and not just a room.

I would suggest backpackers if you’re 19 – 24. They have a lot of fun and it’s easy to connect and get laid. At the least you have a crew to go out with on your first few nights. Once in Cape Town (best one), Daddy Long Legs, Ashanti’s and Long St backpackers are the usual spots.

Needless to say, it’s going to be hard to fuck in a dorm so be wise about this.

Otherwise, there’s a lot of great hotels here and the exchange rate allows for cheaper prices than what you would find in NA/European places.

Refer to the map above.


Camps bay and Clifton are the popular ones and they are busy as hell in the summer. Everyone has a 6 pack here. Keep in mind Clifton 2nd is the gay beach. This can be your starting point. Llandudno is also amazing.

Muizenberg, Gordon’s Bay and a few spots on the West Coast are the surfing hubs.

Surfing is big here, if you are a surfer, you will attract a certain kind of girl. Just remember, the water is fucking frigid.

You can easily find further information on surfing when you get here.


Instagram is massive here, if you have a decent profile, it will add validity to yourself. Girls will sooner or later ask for it. Social proof son.

Tinder is also the defacto dating app. Bumble not so much. Pretty much follow all of BlurredSevens’ advice on this i.e. have a standout profile with pro photos and you will do well. Girls are really hot here and moreso on Tinder so if you’re not the best looking, it might be difficult. If you’re hot, then fire it up ASAP.

Whatsapp – everyone uses whatsapp for communication and when you get a girls number or bounce from Tinder, you will be using this app to communicate.


Coffeeshops and daygame:

• V&A Waterfront
The main hub for all tourists, rich locals etc. It’s a massive mall with curio shops, restaurants, coffeeshops, cinemas and so on. I avoid this place as it’s mainly couples. Most malls are in the suburbs so will leave them out.

• Truth
Great daygame place, used to be my bread and butter. The lay out makes it easy to talk to other girls as you can sit on a long bench next to them and chat them up. Easy discussion, bonus points if you go for a smoke and get them to look after your shit. Great coffee too and friendly staff

• Bootleggers
I personally love all bootleggers. Good coffee and fresh juices and always attract honeys. Long benches here too, making it easy to hit on women.

• Beleza
Perfect for Sunday breakfasts (pretty cheap) with approachable girls. It’s a Portuguese restaurant by night but open area in the day. On Upper Kloof st.

• Rick’s American Café
Great vibe, nice happy hour, a lot of cool people. Great for day2s, especially on the terrace in the summer. I love their food (Middle Eastern). In Park Rd, adjacent to Kloof.

• Yours Truly
Hipster deluxe with hotties floating around. A lot of groups though and foreigners, pretty saturated. Kloof st and Bree st.

• Deluxe
Small place but great coffee. Greenmarket square, next to the souvenir places. Can day game in this area.

• Anything on Kloof St. and Camps Bay is good during the day. Upscale white people and trophy wives.

• Woodstock Exchange
Decent places but overpriced and hipsters. Lot’s of hotties on work break if you want to daygame.

• Sea Point Promenade in the summer is somewhat like a mini-Venice Beach.
Skaters, joggers, street vendors and lots of quality getting some Vitamin D. Rent a bike and go for a ride. Ice cream places are the best for daygame and the benches allow for good interactions; there’s a jungle gym too.

Met countless local and foreign girls here. It joins in to Mouille Point (the lighthouse) where there’s putt putt golf and the greatest gelato place, The Creamery. Good for bringing girls here. Most paragliders land on this promenade.

Markets for Day Game

• The Biscuit Mill
A market in Woodstock on Saturdays with souvenir shops, live music, food stalls etc. Day game paradise, on Saturdays but I prefer bringing girls here.

• City Bowl Market in Hope St. (nights, can instadate)
On Thursdays in town, accessible for everyone and a lot of hotties/foreigners/students

• Oranjezicht Market
Moved from Oranjezicht to near the waterfront, attracts a lot of people and MILFs

• Hout Bay Market
Most popular market with tourists, a lot of opportunities for easy lays

• Milnerton Market
Shit, a lot of old stuff that attracts old people; also out of your way, don’t bother

• Rondebosch Craft Market
In the suburbs so a bit out of the way if you're staying in CBD but good if you are staying in Observatory. A lot of students on Saturdays

• The Palms Market
In Woodstock, heavy on hipsters and young crowds

VA Waterfront Market
Lots of tourists, overpriced but you can still get a cheeky flirt in and day2. I really don't mind the quality here and will hit it up occasionally.

Definitely visit the Biscuit Mill, VA Waterfront Market and then if you’re still keen, perhaps Oranjezicht Market.

So where should I go to?

* denotes price range
W = White
CL = Colored
B = Black
F = Foreigners
S = Students/Interns
E = Everyone
CQ = cliquey
25+ = older crowd (lack of this denotes mainly younger crowd)

Bolded ones are recommended and assume all places can be dangerous as you’re not a local and don’t have that crime radar set up.


V&A Waterfront towards Sea Point (Atlantic Seaboard)
• The Grand *** - E, CQ, 25+
Upscale beach bar. Lots of hotties, reasonable door policy, worth the bottle service if you want to be a baller.

• Alba Lounge *** - F, W, B, 25+
Great day2 place- chilled lounge bar at the Waterfront with good cocktails. Classy place to take your daygame ladies.

• Rocklands (formerly La Vie) ** - W
Sea Point promenade beach bar. Lots of hotties who are running on the promenade stop here for a coffee. Good for day2 or bouncing a girl you meet on the promenade for an insta-date.

• Asoka ** - B, CL, 25+
Restaurant which turns into a bar- lots of foreign hotties and locals mixed. Good music usually, house and danceable tracks. On Kloof.

• Yours Truly + Up Yours (Kloof) ** - E
Same as above but turns into a bar at night. Lots of groups, but easy girls, foreigners etc. Once in in Cape Town (hostel), is part of this bar. Up Yours is the bar upstairs. Absolutely kicks off in the summer with plenty of hot women but lots of hipster and woke people. Not for those who cannot control conversations but you can lose yourself in the music upstairs.

• Tiger’s Milk (Kloof) *** - W, 25+, CQ
This place has the hottestwomen in Cape Town, period. The who’s who come here but it’s a restaurant outside and a bar inside where people just catch up and have post-work drinks. Hot white women are in abundance, some are open but most are cliquey. You can catch a few of them later on at Village Idiot. A good 8PM onward spot.

• Cause & Effect Cocktail Bar *** - E, 25+
Come here for the cocktails. Great women and very well set out place, just off Kloof in Park Road. It’s opposite a very popular burger joint, Jerry’s (amazing burgers), should you want a quick bite and then come here. Good starting point.

• Blah Blah Bar **
Germans and hipsters, some hot girls here and there but free entrance and okay for picking up and bouncing to Jackal/Asoka. Would avoid to be honest.

Bree/Loop St.

• Orphanage Cocktail Bar*** - E, CQ, 25+
Best cocktails in town, hottest women, great music. Used to be my local and went 4/4 on weekends with lays from this spot. It's died down slightly but it's still rocking. On Bree St.

• Arcade *** - E, CQ
Probably the cliquiest place in Cape Town, yet I recommend. Next to Tigers, the hottest women in Cape Town. Right next to one of the main modelling agencies too, the average height of men and women combined is 1.80m. Strict face control at the door but great music. Worth a pass by. I don’t like the fact that it gets really packed and people spill out on the pavements.

• La Parada *** - E, 25+, CQ
Pricey tapas bar with good food. Owned by the same people of Tigers Milk so you get similar folk here but more multicultural. Nice women but not too approachable.

• &union ** - W, CQ
Craft beer house, it’s got decent food and nice smoking area with benches making it easy to hit on women. Mainly groups though.

• Yours Truly (Loop) ** - E
A smaller version of the Kloof branch but pumps just as much. It’s logistically king, being just above Greenmarket Square, worth a quick pop in. Up the road from Aces n Spades, more hot women

• Aces n Spades - W, CQ
If you like rock n roll, this is your spot. Lots of hot alternative white girls here but also mixed groups.

• Village Idiot *** - W, CQ
The 2nd bastion of white people in town, after Tiger's Milk in Kloof. Hot locals, foreigners and usually in groups of girls. A few hen parties but it’s very diverse with age but not race. Also, really shit music. Great smoking area and easy to hook up here. Bonus pool table in the back. Easy to approach girls, definitely recommend. Quality is immense.

• Jade Lounge *** - B, CL, CQ
Upscale bar, in Green Point. Fag hags deluxe, but quality is present. Older crowd with money but definitely a good looking bunch. Has declined over the years.

West CBD
• Perseverance Tavern * - W, CL, B (good place to shoot the shit before heading out)
Oldest pub in CT- Great bar for sports and groups. Good place to have a few before hitting up the other bars. A lot of girls come on weekdays to have a drink after work. On Buitenkant St. Really, really fantastic pub grub (new owners). Come here with your bros and decent for day2s.

• Harrington’s Cocktail Lounge *** - E, 25+
This place is my bread and butter, I have done 5-6 weekends in a row here in the past. It’s on lockdown for me so I am biased but for a good reason. Really hot women here, 25-40 years old. Music is between RnB and greatest hits with some electronic. Easy, great cocktails and logistically ok but on the ‘west’ side of the CBD. Lots of hen parties here. Would recommend, in top 3 for me.

• Shack/Mercury * - W, CQ
Lower scale bar, a lot of skaters and rockers hang out here. Lots of pool tables and dirt cheap drinks. Girls are of questionable quality but it’s good for a few drinks. ‘west side’ of CBD.

Camps Bay – I avoid as it’s more of a tourist trap really but you will visit either way as a tourist

• Caprice *** - E, 25+, CQ
One of the more exclusive places in CT. The who’s who of Cape Town comes here to be seen, has house music and platinum blondes and flammable women floating around. Status is king here, roll with your entourage. There were 2 hits here last year and people got caught in the crossfire. It hasn’t deterred anyone though.

• Dizzy’s * - W, B
3 mins from Caprice, a lot of the alternative crowd comes here for sport, pool and just to chill out. Easy girls but quality not so high. The stoners hang out here.

• Chinchilla Rooftop Bar *** - E, 25+, CQ
Upscale, sleek rooftop bar, great for sundowners. A bit pricey (as is Camps Bay main strip) but lot’s of hot women here. Come for the ambience, not to game.

Long St. - the more laid back and dangerous place
• Bierhouse ** - E
Largest choice of beer in Cape Town- attracts a lot of backpackers, locals and hipsters who love their craft beer. Mainly groups but smoking area is good for picking up hotties who are usually going elsewhere later, good for bouncing/making friends. On Long St.

• The Waiting Room ** - E
Great place for picking up girls with a lot of RnB or rap playing occasionally. Mixed, younger crowds. It’s near the top of Long St, next to South China Dim Sum bar (great restaurant).

• 169 ** - E
This venue reminds me of a Las Ramblas bar, playing reggaeton, RnB and urban music. Lots of people 19-24 years of age and a lot of tourists as 169 is on Long St. Pretty easy but also quite dodgy. Toilets are pretty disgusting (for those who dabble in those things).

• Neighbourhood ** - W, CL
Also on Long St, good place for pre-drinks. Lots of women in groups (ladies night anyone?), free entry.

• Dubliner * - F
The staple of every backpacker- full of foreigners and tourists. Cheap prices, easy girls, dirty nights. If this is your scene, you will clean up. In Long St. Usually one of the last places to close but full of dodgy characters. I repeat, one of the easiest places to pull, in Cape Town.

• Sgt. Pepper *** - E, CQ
If you’re young and don’t mind some 80s or 90s jams on a sweaty dancefloor, this is your place. It’s directly opposite Bierhouse and heaves with people. Lots of hot young girls but quite cliquey. It’s a restaurant that turns in to a club at 10PM.

• Tjing Tjing ** - E, 25+, CQ
Quite a vibe, a bit gay but lots of good looking women and reasonable music.

• Forester's Arms *** - W, 25+, CQ
Big local hub, in Newlands, Southern Suburbs. A lot of groups and couples but it is great for sports and casual dinners. Very popular amongst locals and the 'desperate housewives' crowd as it is in suburbia. The stronghold of white people in the Suburbs and overpriced but what an atmosphere on rugby days!

• Oblivion *** - W, CL, 25+, CQ
No dj, shit soundsystem and expensive. Amazing terrace upstairs which is the main hooking point for me. Nonetheless, people flock here like crazy as it’s the ‘let’s just go to Oblivion on our way home’. Easy, 25-30 year old women here, come here when you need to get laid and can tolerate the shit ambience.

Observatory – Students/Interns/Foreigners

• Forex * - E
Great food, cheap prices, full of hot students from around the world. I come here when I want a break from the norm and something easy. We call it the McDonalds of getting pussy, you know what you’re getting. Thursdays are the best night (beer pong night) but they have events daily. Younger crowd, a lot of annoying people but hey, it’s shooting fish in a barrel. Black guys do well here but honestly, it's fucking easy.

• Stones * - E
Average bar with around 20 pool tables, come here to shoot the shit and bring a girl to play pool with. Fun times. Cold approach is doable in smoking area.

• Trenchtown * - E
Reggae bar populated with hippies and the woke folk. I generally avoid but it’s alright as a quick pit stop to see what’s up. I have been surprised in the past.


• Shimmy’s *** - E, 25+ CQ
Hot women, high prices, exclusive people. Entourage game recommended, the foreigners are easy but locals are difficult. Electronic music, swimming pool area and expensive everything. Heavy face control.
Entrance fee depends on event. I would recommend based off the event, it's 50/50.

• Decodance * - E, 25+
80’s/90’s club in Sea Point (Main Rd). Funny if in a group, mainly older women looking for validation here.
Entrance fee depends on night.

• District ** - E, CQ
New club which is the younger, dirtier version of Harrington’s. It’s a club and has some decent events but can be quite dodgy. Lot’s of hot young girls, regardless but also quite cliquey. The type of place you can get into a fight and then buy some XTC and forget about it 20 minutes later. Electronic music going towards psytrance (lol).
Entrance fee depends on night.

• Reset ** - E
The new version of ERA, the previous club here. I am sad as ERA was probably the best club Cape Town has seen in the past 5 years and this doesn’t do it justice. Electronic music, lots of drugs. All sorts of people here. Easy to get in.

• Tau ** - W
The best pre-3AM electronic club in Cape Town. It’s in Green Point and attracts a lot of hot white girls who are into this kind of music. Great sound system, layout and very aesthetically pleasing club. You might wait 10-20 mins to get in. R100-150 entrance.

• Oasis * - E
Long St, attracts a lot of foreigners and is relatively cheap. Quality of girls is hit and miss; sometimes poor, sometimes lovely. Techno.

• Modular *** - E
Techno club open until 5am. I call this place the Dungeon. No photos allowed. Lots of smoke. People fucking in the bathrooms and plenty of drugs. Got an ATM in there.
It’s in Riebeeck St which is mighty dangerous which is why they close the gates and won’t let you out without a bouncer escorting you to your uber.

Plenty of easy, down to earth girls. Lots of stunners on drugs. Some P4P but it’s really not necessary here.

I repeat, come here if you’re into techno (industrial, heavy). Sometimes have lo-fi and house nights. Generally R100 entrance.

• 31 *** - CL, B, CQ
On the 31st floor of the ABSA building, lots of house music and remixes. I haven’t been in a few years but my friends tell me there’s still hot women everywhere with a lax door policy. Near modular. Usually R100 to get in but guestlist also easy. Cool staff.

• Fiction ** - E
I used to love this place but it became repetitive (for people as well). If you enjoy electronic music i.e. techno, DNB, house and NOT EDM, this is your place. A lot of alternative girls and tourists. On Long St and easy women.

• Tiger Tiger * - E
In Claremont, if you want to remind yourself of your University/College clubbing days. Lots of hot 18-22 year olds but the music is terrible and the place is filled with jock students. Logistically a nightmare if you’re in CBD. Come here if you want shitty music and want to get into a fight.

• Boogies * - E
Similar to Tiger Tiger, playing pretty commercial music and swamped with 18-22 year olds. High quality of women here, mainly white. I come here from time to time just to check it out but never really stay long. Usually to collect girls from here who message me or something and I wouldn’t really recommend but FYI.

I don’t know much about the Northern Suburbs are it’s literally suburbia and most hot Afrikaans girls come down here anyways. When I do head there, it's to drink wine and get day drunk with Afrikaans girls, but that's about it.

Festivals & Events

First Thursdays
Restaurants, art galleries and shops stay open until pretty late where you can drink wine, look at art and generally socialize. It’s great and of course, on the first Thursday of each month.

Notable bars – La Parada, Charango, &union.

If you come down, you should definitely go for an outdoor music festival. People here live for this and the venues are quite extraordinary, as you can imagine, due to the sheer beauty of South Africa.

AfrikaBurn – April 29th – May 5

Our answer to Burning Man. People from around the world flock here to be part of the 10000 or so people who take par in this.

Like BM, it’s pretty life changing, lots of naked women and general awesome vibes. Some hot, some hippy. It's a fucking experience though and lots of logistical prep required. Find some hotties and go with.

General sale tickets go on sale end of September and again in January for around R2000. Not much at all.

2018/19 Festival List

Personal recommendations:

• Kinky Disco
• We Love Summer
• Tea in the Tree
• Rocking the Daisies
• Sexy Groovy Love
• Alien Safari
• Bazique

These are mainly techno and house events. The rest are psytrance. If that’s your vibe then Rezonance, Alien Safari, Love and Light and Vortex are your thing.

Of note:

Cape Town HSBC Sevens
Rugby tournament weekend in 7s format, people get dressed up and it’s a massive party. It’s usually in December.

DHL Stormers games
When the Super Rugby season is on, you can catch the local team at DHL Newlands, also worth it for the atmosphere. Lots of parties after the games too, especially when we win.

Additional Resources:

Lonely Planet - Cape Town

TripAdvisor - Restaurants

TripAdvisor - Shit to Do

TripAdvisor - Wine Farms - Constantia, Stellenbosch, Franschoek and Stanford

More Info on Wine Farms

I recommend Tokara, Babylonstoren, Boschendal, Rust en Vrede but there are so many, you would have to be a borderline alcoholic to get through them.

Groot Constantia, Beau Constantia and Eagles Nest are in Constantia (a suburb) and easily accessible by the tour bus mentioned further up. Great way to meet foreign girls!

Finally, racism is not really a thing here and people don't really care for it. We live in our bubble here and mind our own business. Please don't bring politics or farm murders and shit in to this thread. It's not relevant.

Open to any questions, amendments and if you're here, PM me as I will forget to monitor this thread.

I might add some more info on wine farms but open to any other suggestions.

edit: As Khalid mentions below, there is a water crisis so water saving is encouraged. Don't flush after you piss, otherwise I am gonna pay for it once you've left.

Seriously, it's getting better but if it's yellow let it mellow. If it's brown... Yeah.

Cape Town 2018

I was in cape town this August for 8 nights and met with Noir, so I can vouch for the accuracy of this datasheet. The quality of the girls is high but they're not easy. For comparison, I found London easier.

I got two average bangs from tinder a 5.5 white girl and a black girl that was a 6 but had an amazing ass! Reminded me of the pornstar Cherokee lol.

Cliques are a big thing here especially in certain places. Not an easy city but if you are here for long term and you have some game and persistence I'm sure you could crack it.

I was with a girl in one of the bars (tigers milk) and when she went to the toilet, these two hot chicks started talking to me about something random and they complimented me on my accent. The girl i was with came out of the toilet (she was watching me) so i said bye to the girls and left them there.... girls always talk to you when you're with another chick lol. As we were leaving, they were giving evil eyes to the girl i was with.

If you're coming from the UK or EU it should be pretty cheap. Out of the African countries I've been to this summer, cape town was the cheapest. I had a budget of 180 GBP per day and never came close to it. Most I spent was 90 GBP per day and even then I ended up buying gifts, souvenirs etc.

Driving was a breeze and I recommend a car if you have a licence. Cost of rental was cheap. I got a brand new bmw 3 series for 300 GBP for 8 days (booked online in advance).

I didn't really notice the drought even though posters and labels were everywhere. I imagine it would be worse when the weather gets hot.

Also, August is winter season so the vibe of cape town would be very different to summer season.

Cape Town 2018

Superb data sheet. Most of my holidays in Cape Town tend to be family affairs with me being in the Rylands-Athlone-Rondebosch area and so I'm not too familiar with Cape nightlife but I can vouch for the rest.

A scenic location and without a doubt the best of South Africa (though I much prefer some of the Durbs beaches and Cape winters are pretty bad by SA standards). A definite must though! How often have you slummed it with the more 'ratchet' coloured girls there, Noir? They can be easy pickings, not that I would suggest members dabble too freely in potentially dangerous merchandise.

Not to get too political (I respect your earlier appeal), but I second the opinion of choosing JHB for black girls, if that is your preference and you aren't black yourself. The race dynamics in Cape Town are quite peculiar, even for S.A - I suspect it may have something to do with the traditionally lower amounts of blacks and the sudden Eastern Cape explosion since Democracy.

If you're reading this, book a flight ASAP!

Cape Town 2018

Great datasheet, thanks for putting all that effort in. In lieu of buying you a beer have a rep point.

Cape Town 2018

Crime didn't seem that bad in Cape Town when I was there. I was cold approached by scammers but I didn't say anything back (because if locals hear your accent then that might just make you a more tempting target.

Hands in your pocket, padlocking bags and minimizing use of your phone should eliminate most street petty crime in most destinations around the world. Really the only sketchy area of the world (popular with tourists) is largely Latin America.

Still on Reddit there's a lot of people in Durban and Jberg who've claimed they've been a victim of armed robbery and violent rapes. But I can't think of a reason why any white tourist would go to Jberg or Durban (I stayed at a high security resort outside of Jberg but there were guys with guns guarding it and electrical fences).

Cape Town 2018

Quote: (08-29-2018 08:24 AM)MANic Wrote:  

How often have you slummed it with the more 'ratchet' coloured girls there, Noir? They can be easy pickings, not that I would suggest members dabble too freely in potentially dangerous merchandise.

I am an honorary colored guy, to put it in the terms of all my colored mates.

Quote: (08-29-2018 09:36 AM)BaatumMania Wrote:  

Crime didn't seem that bad in Cape Town when I was there. I was cold approached by scammers but I didn't say anything back (because if locals hear your accent then that might just make you a more tempting target.

It's probability, over a long enough time scale shit will happen to you. For some people it's during the time they visit, for others it's months later.

It's definitely dangerous though, let's not kid ourselves.

Cape Town 2018

Noir - Thanks for this solid knowledge drop, everything checks out from my experience too.

I'm back in cape town for the second time and will be here for another month or so, if any of you cool cats are gonna be around hit me up and lets get some beers

Coming here after having spent the last 4 months in Uganda and Ghana, the game difficulty level went up *dramatically* for me here but there's definitely some good talent and worth the effort.

Cape Town 2018

Great data sheet. Thanks.

Cape Town 2018

Thanks for this datasheet. I rarely see Cape Town mentioned on here and now it's on my radar.

Pussy ain't for pussies...

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