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Throwing away nice paying career in exchange for fun job when young.
#51

Throwing away nice paying career in exchange for fun job when young.

Quote: (07-04-2018 02:28 AM)a beer is enough Wrote:  

Since we are referring other threads now, on that race thread I said I hit a peak right after college when I was in NYC where due to being around the right people and right crowds, I ended up getting laid more than I ever have in my entire life. The notch count I gave was below average for this forum when I was asked about it though. In fact, things have gone downhill for me since then even though the dating apps are friendly.

What I was saying on that thread is actually similar to this thread and there is that carry over too, it is the complaining aspect of it. Like in that thread, countless guys were crying about how unfair game is because of race and how American women who are hot are so racist. I was trying to make the case that it isn't really true but obviously I was wrong for pointing out the victim mentality of guys crying that life is so unfair because they are not white.

Now look, that same complaining mentality that solves nothing comes to this thread. I have a pet peeve for that sort of stuff, if it isn't answering the question or solving the issue, why are we even talking about it?

I don't care how awesome college was or was supposed to be but storming into this thread saying all men should be monogamous in their twenties and practically give up after college, that isn't solving anything. Then we get endless worshiping of the college experience while complaining of life after college, it doesn't solve shit and just creates a depressed atmosphere on the thread and forum.

Whether it is crying about race or crying about a phase of life that has passed, it really doesn't solve a thing so why not talk solutions?

I don't mean for this to come off harsh, but it might.

OP, I don't think you're able to distinguish between victim mentality and reality for a lot of guys. Not everyone is complaining. I've seen your posts in the Indian Guy/Game Thread. Those posts are all over the place. You also seem to have a hell of a lot of time on your hands double posting and posting every 5 minutes. Holy Shit!

There is a peculiar thing about your posts as I read them all. You want to come across in that other thread and this thread as the guy that has no confidence issues. Yet, in this thread, instead of paying more attention to the posts that are offering you alternative advice, you are trying to justify your decision by only paying attention to the answers that sound good to you, not necessarily the effective ones. Rudebwoy has been there and done that. If you care, I would heed his advice. I told you this may sound harsh, but I'm just telling you what I see.

Me and doc holliday had a great conversation about this over text yesterday.

I went backwards. I got married and started having kids and only afterwards upon some frustrating experiences did I learn game, approached women etc. Doc mentioned it was FOMO (Fear of Missing Out). I agreed. Throughout this entire time, I was just wondering how much easier it would have been had I been better calibrated socially growing up, banged more girls earlier etc. However, after a few years in the "game," I realized that what I had earlier was significantly better than what I lost by chasing tail/poon. It would have done nothing significant for me except for this realization alone. However, the career I built and family I raised means a whole lot more to me and is a better return on emotional and social investment than some women, poon or having some nightclub on lock. Why is this? I'll tell you. I'm 40 years old. If I wanted to, I know I could attract women half my age into my later years. However, I could be doing this with more resources and confidence if I wanted to.

I'm just very surprised, OP, that you don't have a social circle of friends or family that wouldn't advise you similarly as I am or some others like Slickyboy and Rudebwoy have. Not everyone on the forum has broad experiences like these guys do. There is a social deficiency there that some may not be noticing. You need more healthy relationships in your life, my friend. It's great to turn to the forum for big decisions like this, but you also need to surround yourself physically with more capable male friends. I have found that a core of these friends came from the forum as I built relationships with them over time but my family is a big part of my support system as well.

If you have the potential to get into a good STEM career for example, it's an absolutely horrible idea to go into bartending or car washing or whatever. I advise people on careers for a living. Every day you waste is another day some other dude gains on you in a certain field. Don't brand yourself a loser early. Best suggestion I can provide is to forget notch counts, find women as you will. Short term or Long Term relationships are fine too with the right women and concentrate the fuck out of your academics and career.

Poon will not go away because you took a break to improve yourself. Poon never adds value to you as a man. You as a man add value to poon.
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#52

Throwing away nice paying career in exchange for fun job when young.

Its normal for guys to feel confident about certain parts of life but not others, to me, the whole woe is me mentality just doesn't sit in about race. As for double posting, I rather post in smaller bits addressing points by some users than taking an entire big post to do it.

As for this very thing, I'll admit it is FOMO I feeling for my college days and never having had a chance to be a part of that party scene. This is something that pains me a good deal and it is something I want to work on,. I don't share this sort of thing with family and friends because if you let people get too close, they'll do their best to stop you from getting hot girls, partying and making money; that's what I have personally learned. You cannot share game and life goals with most people, it will alienate them. Most of my friends and family were not supportive of me going to NYC out of college, I did go and loved every moment of it, now I will work on getting back there.

The other thing I don't do which I might have been doing a lot of lately on here is mope and contemplate a lot, time is the most valuable thing on this planet you cannot afford to waste much of. Despite my cranky attitude in recent posts, I am appreciative that people took their time to give advice.

For now, I'll just take action. If I can somehow sneak in a nightlife job on top of my 9 to 5, that is ideal because I am only working 40 hrs and that is not a lot. If there is a way I can sneak a fun job in there, then that should be more than good enough, people in their 20s can work 70hrs a week anyways.

I know that money can come when I am older and I understand that but the last thing I want to do in my twenties is for them to be some empty in terms of fun. The partying, drinking, hedonism and potential for making friends connected to that sort of life will not present itself that readily when I am older so I would like to take advantage of that opportunity right now or at least try to. Given that these are my twenties and I have the energy I have, I want to make the absolute most of them socially because I do get the impression I won't get the same opportunities once they are over with.

Will try to keep you guys updated on that and if that fails, it might be time to make a tough decision in my twenties because my gut tells me I won't get a chance to have this sort of life experience once I am in my thirties.

I've spent a bit too much time in recent days on this forum just contemplating shit and I can understand if people are annoyed so I'll take some time to actually make this happen. Thank you all for your contribution but I think this thread has run its course.
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#53

Throwing away nice paying career in exchange for fun job when young.

What is having status in a nightclub?

Unless you are in a big city like NYC/LA/Miami, I don't think it would be worth it.

It is cool to be a bartender or DJ, when you are in college. How can you leverage that into something bigger in the future?

The best time I ever had partying, was when my boy had a super luxury condo 5 minutes from the club district. This has been stated many times on this forum, location trumps almost anything else in the game. So if you are making close to 6 figures, then you should be able to live a similar lifestyle.

You referenced Distant Light, he did a podcast on our show awhile back. It is on YouTube and I think you will find it helpful.

The guy is next level.

Our New Blog:

http://www.repstylez.com
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#54

Throwing away nice paying career in exchange for fun job when young.

Quote: (07-05-2018 06:02 PM)a beer is enough Wrote:  

The partying, drinking, hedonism and potential for making friends connected to that sort of life will not present itself that readily when I am older so

It looks like your mind is already made up, so good luck in your venture and post up to let us know how it goes. My last bit of advice would be to be careful who you consider your "friends" in that scene - the nightlife arena has a tendency to attract some really shady characters (both men and women) so don't be too quick to trust anyone.

Pussy ain't for pussies...
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#55

Throwing away nice paying career in exchange for fun job when young.

Quote: (07-05-2018 06:02 PM)a beer is enough Wrote:  

I know that money can come when I am older and I understand that but the last thing I want to do in my twenties is for them to be some empty in terms of fun. The partying, drinking, hedonism and potential for making friends connected to that sort of life will not present itself that readily when I am older so I would like to take advantage of that opportunity right now or at least try to. Given that these are my twenties and I have the energy I have, I want to make the absolute most of them socially because I do get the impression I won't get the same opportunities once they are over with.

Will try to keep you guys updated on that and if that fails, it might be time to make a tough decision in my twenties because my gut tells me I won't get a chance to have this sort of life experience once I am in my thirties.

I've spent a bit too much time in recent days on this forum just contemplating shit and I can understand if people are annoyed so I'll take some time to actually make this happen. Thank you all for your contribution but I think this thread has run its course.

I'm not annoyed because I understand where you're coming from, because myself (and I'm sure other older guys on this forum) were in the same spot at your age. We're just trying to help you (and by extension any other young dude feeling the same way) out by offering what we've learned from our histories of making poor choices in the hopes that you young guys will learn from them.

But I guess somethings are only learned the hard way, and if you want to YOLO the rest of your twenties then you got to do what you got to do. Just understand there always consequences to the choices you make, even ones as banal as choosing to party 5 nights a week.

But I also want to address your mindset that you won't have the same energy in your thirties as your twenties, and that you can't have the same life experiences in your thirties as you can in your twenties. To be honest, I had the same mindset in my mid twenties and I think most American guys have it as well. It's probably some off shoot from the old Hippie/Baby Boomer bullshit of "never trust anyone over 30" or some kind of social conditioning we had that made 30 years old some kind of cut off point between youth and adulthood.

But what you can't see now is that you will have the same energy (if not more) in your 30s if you take care of yourself and have your shit together. Personally, I feel better, look better and have more energy now than I did when I was 24/25. Due in large part to not drinking alcohol all the time, smoking cigarettes, doing drugs and eating like shit.

Also, the money I have now gives me access to trendy restaurants, nightclubs and lounges that I would never have gotten into ten years ago. And don't assume that 30 and over guys only get 30 and over girls. I think I can speak for most of the 30 and over club when I say that I have sex with more 24 years old now than I did when I was 24.

But again you got to do what you got to do. Just don't think you got to get all your jollies in by 30. Personally, I think 50 years old is good cut off point to stop going out chasing tail. But then again I'll probably be 45 saying 60 years old is when I need to stop.
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#56

Throwing away nice paying career in exchange for fun job when young.

I'll definitely take the warning about shady characters.

So I kind of took some time to reflect on this and there is a good chance, even a strong one that Rudebwoy and older users here are right. I'll even say that when it comes to life choices, a lot of you guys have far more wisdom than I do being the age I am.

It would be stupid to throw away a career that guarantees six figures in my thirties on something like a bartending gig, it really would be. That being said, I am only working 40 to 50 hrs a week and I don't give a damn how the work-life balance people spin it, it isn't a lot of time and I have the weekends to do what I want. This is why I am ideally aiming to try and get some bar work or nightlife gig on the side, that I have to make happen.

I also took time to reflect on why being a bartender or DJ, working at a nightclub and that stuff means so much to me, it all ties back to my college days of not being a part of that scene where so much hedonism happened. At times, I have a tough round at letting shit go and this is a great example of it. I really wanted to bartend in college, didn't get a chance to which is why it means so much for me to get that gig at a nightclub before I get too old for it. Every day I feel time slipping by to get these gigs which is why I am going out in a few to ask for the manager at a couple bars to see what we can make happen.

As I have mentioned many times, it isn't even the sex I am aiming for as much, it is that sort of a lifestyle and hedonistic kind of life I feel like few things in life can offer. It is being a part of that kind of a crowd and that kind of a lifestyle that is so tough to be a part of.

Its definitely an ego thing for me because there is just something, I cannot describe in words, attached to being a bartender or DJ fucking hot girls compared to being a dude with an office job spending money to fuck hot girls. I also have a huge soft spot for party girls and just the kind of lifestyle that a nightlife gig will bring me which is why I feel so strongly about it.

The only thing I fear about age is that with age, I won't get the chance to be a part of that lifestyle. You see people in their 30s really dissing partying and hedonism, my gut just tells me that is going to be unavoidable. For me, going in hard on this sort of a life and getting a taste for it means the world and it has had me on the edge of almost throwing away a six figure career before I came to my senses.

Hopefully I can make this work as a side gig.

I am thinking if I can focus on

1. My main career.

2. My side gig.

3. Staying healthy enough.

I should be good to go.

I have cut out most of my friends from my life, they seem to be going nowhere and I just feel like a lot of them are going to hold me back from my dreams of making lots of money, fucking lots of hot girls and living the life I want to live.

As for life after 30, my gut tells me it does end and the window of opportunity to go all in on hedonism and fucking randoms gets a lot tougher. You can't party hard at nightclubs without feeling weird about it, social pressure is a real thing and with the countless guys on this thread proposing monogamy, I know I better act fast, will update you guys on how it goes with the side-job hunt.

It might even be for nothing and I might have to live with the tough tough feeling that whatever I want, I missed it in college, but I rather lived knowing I tried.

Definitely going to check out that youtube podcast with Distant Light.
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