[AneroidOcean]

I think you need to find some military red-pill viewpoints or something.

I'm not saying 100% this is you, but it seems that a lot of guys get into the military and don't internalize the discipline (gaining self-discipline and even more important, drive) and that coupled with the lack of many female options (most military bases are not in pussy paradises), leaves the military men almost submissive to their women.

You're basically the same age, you should be marrying a younger girl and putting babies in her, not this girl that is already exhibiting poor traits (and has an even more worrisome family history). What you're failing to recognize is that you will only have MORE younger women that are tattoo free, smoking-free, etc... as you get older and mature further. Especially so if you can break this societal/military programming you have going on.

I really don't think you should be married to her, much less considering kids (especially when you're depressed and getting out of the military with no current job prospects), but if you have to, I'd just tell her, "you know if you get a tattoo we're through. I'd considered kids with you, but I'll never have children with a woman who has tatoos. My kids will grow up with a masculine man and a feminine mother, period. It's your choice, but that is the consequence."

[TheWastelander]

You're 26. You should be banging 18-year-olds right now, not wasting time on this 24-year-old tattoo girl who has got you henpecked.

[IstillLoveVistaBaby]

How would I get out of this? I can't leave her while I'm in the military because the gynocratic society that it has become will villainize me and that will jeopardize my chance at VA benefits. Also they seem to build military bases in the shittiest of towns in America so I don't have literally (hitler) any other options if I were to separate here and now? We have plans to move to a bigger city after this is all over, I'm thinking then would be the opportune time to see how things are and make an ultimatum decision, because I will no longer be within the confines of the system that further pussified my actions, and there will be much more people our age and such etc.

She will bring up the tattoo shit more because of the shit-test nature etc, but I have not said yes to it yet, we will see how this progresses.

[Steelex]

Well bro whether she gets a tat or not she's still a childish little ho. You can't change that.

[Simeon_Strangelight]

(08-17-2017 06:24 AM)IstillLoveVistaBaby Wrote:  

How would I get out of this? I can't leave her while I'm in the military because the gynocratic society that it has become will villainize me and that will jeopardize my chance at VA benefits. Also they seem to build military bases in the shittiest of towns in America so I don't have literally (hitler) any other options if I were to separate here and now? We have plans to move to a bigger city after this is all over, I'm thinking then would be the opportune time to see how things are and make an ultimatum decision, because I will no longer be within the confines of the system that further pussified my actions, and there will be much more people our age and such etc.

She will bring up the tattoo shit more because of the shit-test nature etc, but I have not said yes to it yet, we will see how this progresses.

I doubt guys here will advise divorce - we are not marriage therapists.

You are married now, you can start by retaking frame, learning Game, learning Red Pill. If she gets a tattoo, then it's not the end of the world. Since both of you are young, then getting her pregnant would be a bad idea at least until you are at a better wavelength.

Her lack of reaction to your frame does not make you pussified. Women ignore even Alpha husbands or fight them on a variety of things - and that is even if the guy had instantly a dominating frame. After you started out on a bad foot, it is hard to regain terrain since women simply see you how you were in the beginning. Sometimes a change works over time and sometimes it does not.

If there are additional repercussions of divorce right now, then it is an additional reason not to do it for now. Take it as a learning curve, tell her that she can get a tattoo on her ass - that is your compromise.

If she is as attractive as you say she is, then she will soon enough realize that her options have gone up tremendously in the US. Chances are there is no reason for you to file for divorce - she will do it for you.

A Red Pill man even with massive Game and Alpha frame goes into marriage with eyes fully open - he goes in knowing that the system is utterly twisted against them and he does it knowing that a woman can blow up a marriage anytime. And if divorce comes, then you deal with it - best if you can afford it and don't have to pay alimony/child support of overly stifling nature. In any case you have to take this into consideration in advance.

I always tell mine, that I am not afraid of separation - I will just get myself a much younger hotter version of her. That works by the way even with hotter women, because a 28 year old knows that an 18-22 year old hottie is certainly more attractive than her.

Detachment also helps in this respect, but that is more a philosophical/mental endeavor.

[TooFineAPoint]

(08-17-2017 06:24 AM)IstillLoveVistaBaby Wrote:  

How would I get out of this? I can't leave her while I'm in the military because the gynocratic society that it has become will villainize me and that will jeopardize my chance at VA benefits. Also they seem to build military bases in the shittiest of towns in America so I don't have literally (hitler) any other options if I were to separate here and now? We have plans to move to a bigger city after this is all over, I'm thinking then would be the opportune time to see how things are and make an ultimatum decision, because I will no longer be within the confines of the system that further pussified my actions, and there will be much more people our age and such etc.

She will bring up the tattoo shit more because of the shit-test nature etc, but I have not said yes to it yet, we will see how this progresses.

Take it from a guy who went through it -- all this "it will get better when we move / I have a better job / she is more settled" never comes to pass. It won't get better, and playing wait and see rarely works.

It sounds like you have bigger fish to fry with your environment and your career. A lot of your talk also makes it sound like you (feel like you) are powerless, and are beholden to all these forces that hold you down or you don't agree with.

You may need to learn how to rise above that mindset before you are able to solve any of the tangible problems you are identifying. Or you may see that, with a new mindset, some of these aren't problems in the first place.

[Adonis]

Bro I have BTDT, almost to a "T". You need to leave, in 5-10 years you will look back on it and realize it's the best move you ever made. Here is what you need to do:

Adonis' 5 step plan to fire your wife...

1. Talk to a lawyer and get the real deal on divorce laws in your AO. Don't talk to your work bros and other barracks lawyer types. Divorce is a civil matter and has fuck all to do with the military or the UCMJ. If your paycheck is going to a joint account, submit a new direct deposit to another bank. Put a hold on your credit report.

2. Set up a landing pad for yourself. A friends house, rent a room, etc. stash some cash for living expenses if she has access to the bank accounts. Due to the military angle you will have to subsidize her somewhat until the divorce is final, so plan to split your BAH with her at the least. Your pride will get in the way here but look at it as investing in your future.

3. Inform your chain of command you are going through a divorce. This will head her off at the pass in case she wants to "cry wolf" when you pop the news and say that you beat her or aren't paying the bills etc.

4. Activate these separation protocols. Wait until she is at work or gone for the day to move your shit out. Travel light - I took my clothes my bed and my guns - that's it. Pay the lawyer to have her served and after that never, ever find yourself alone in with her in private. Always either meet in public or have a friend with you.

5. Don't even think about having sex with her ever again. Ever!

If you are paying her, keep copies of everything just in case she calls your command or tries to say she is destitute. If you "grease the wheels" as I did and pay her off for a short while (6 mo) pay the bills directly don't just give her the money because she will blow it and not pay the bills.

I was in a similar situation as you back in my early 20's. Married a flaky horny slut while I was still mainlining blue pills. I thought the same things as you are now. This shit will ruin my career, my rep, my family etc. Bullshit, 10 years past and I'm fucking unstoppable like a blue collar playboy.

You can do this.

[YoungBlade]

Fuck her in the butt one last time before nexting her.

Tattoos means she's down for anal.

[Chetthebaker]

When I was your age I got together with a chick who was awesome. Hot, same interests. She had one small innocuous tattoo. Never thought much of it. She also smoked cigarettes. This I hated, and over the course of the relationship - several years- she quit many times and actually never went back quite as heavy. Also wanted another tattoo, but I disallowed it.
We got married, then a couple years later I left.
Shortly after, she got the tattoo - a wraparound on her upper thigh and continued smoking. I had to pay a lot of money to get rid of her despite having no kids.

The takeaway in my case was that although she didn't get the tattoo and did stop smoking (for much of the relationship), she didn't want to. And this made her resentful, which poisoned the relationship.

It doesn't matter if she stops. The fact that she wants to do these things is the problem. I can't speak for every situation, but in my case I realized only years later that these things should have been deal killers from the get go.

[IstillLoveVistaBaby]

(08-17-2017 10:55 AM)Adonis Wrote:  

Bro I have BTDT, almost to a "T". You need to leave, in 5-10 years you will look back on it and realize it's the best move you ever made. Here is what you need to do:

Adonis' 5 step plan to fire your wife...

1. Talk to a lawyer and get the real deal on divorce laws in your AO. Don't talk to your work bros and other barracks lawyer types. Divorce is a civil matter and has fuck all to do with the military or the UCMJ. If your paycheck is going to a joint account, submit a new direct deposit to another bank. Put a hold on your credit report.

2. Set up a landing pad for yourself. A friends house, rent a room, etc. stash some cash for living expenses if she has access to the bank accounts. Due to the military angle you will have to subsidize her somewhat until the divorce is final, so plan to split your BAH with her at the least. Your pride will get in the way here but look at it as investing in your future.

3. Inform your chain of command you are going through a divorce. This will head her off at the pass in case she wants to "cry wolf" when you pop the news and say that you beat her or aren't paying the bills etc.

4. Activate these separation protocols. Wait until she is at work or gone for the day to move your shit out. Travel light - I took my clothes my bed and my guns - that's it. Pay the lawyer to have her served and after that never, ever find yourself alone in with her in private. Always either meet in public or have a friend with you.

5. Don't even think about having sex with her ever again. Ever!

If you are paying her, keep copies of everything just in case she calls your command or tries to say she is destitute. If you "grease the wheels" as I did and pay her off for a short while (6 mo) pay the bills directly don't just give her the money because she will blow it and not pay the bills.

I was in a similar situation as you back in my early 20's. Married a flaky horny slut while I was still mainlining blue pills. I thought the same things as you are now. This shit will ruin my career, my rep, my family etc. Bullshit, 10 years past and I'm fucking unstoppable like a blue collar playboy.

You can do this.

I don't want to do anything like this while I am in the confines of the military. Once I'm out , I'm out, they won't give a rats ass about me. I know its not a good idea in the long run, but we're working through things now and I don't want to go through a divorce and a medical retirement at the same time. I really don't man, those boards can take up to a year and I'm trying to tip-toe the rest of my time in uniform just to avoid any further troubling situations. If she's about to blow up and it happens one day after my separation, then thats fine with me, because then the military will not have anything to do with it. I will not be castigated any more by the anti-male system I'm trapped in. The tattoo thing aside, it just gets on my nerves.

[Simeon_Strangelight]

OP - sounds like a good idea. You don't want to rock the boat and it can get messy in some military environments in combination with your health issues that have future impact on your potential payout/pension. No need to add a bitchy ex-wife to it who may make things really bad for you.

Rollo Tomassi from Rational Male has many articles about soldiers - you will find quite a few insights that will instantly speak to you. Worst case is she gets a tattoo - not the end of the world.

[TIOT12]

(08-17-2017 06:24 AM)IstillLoveVistaBaby Wrote:  

How would I get out of this? I can't leave her while I'm in the military because the gynocratic society that it has become will villainize me and that will jeopardize my chance at VA benefits. Also they seem to build military bases in the shittiest of towns in America so I don't have literally (hitler) any other options if I were to separate here and now? We have plans to move to a bigger city after this is all over, I'm thinking then would be the opportune time to see how things are and make an ultimatum decision, because I will no longer be within the confines of the system that further pussified my actions, and there will be much more people our age and such etc.

She will bring up the tattoo shit more because of the shit-test nature etc, but I have not said yes to it yet, we will see how this progresses.

Sounds like you already know what the right thing to do is and you are just making excuses not to go through with it. The simplest advice is to consult a lawyer regarding your benefits and prospective marriage/divorce. I would do this sooner rather than later. This stuff can vary from state to state but usually the shorter time you are married the cheaper it will be for you. So if you divorce, you want to do it quickly because you can even get it annulled in some cases. In your case, it should be fairly straight forward because you have no children and don't have big incomes. Also, it is a bad idea to tell your girl/wife, attorney, courts, etc. about other money that may be coming to you. Divorce is a big business and if the attorneys think they can get more out of you, they will try and the costs of your divorce could jump considerably. There is a good documentary about divorce that all men and women should see: https://www.divorcecorp.com/

Also, one other suggestion I would give is to delete your prior post talking about your finances. The internet is not a private place and posts like that could come back to haunt you if someone can put together the pieces like the girl or an overzealous divorce attorney or his staff.

Also, for the record, I am not a fan of tattoos on women either. They are a selfish decision that often gives little thought of others or the ramifications of it in the future. When I see a tattoo on a woman, I don't think marriage material. My first thought is that she is someone who probably makes bad decisions and is easy.

[PapayaTapper]

OP I agree that divorce right now may not be prudent or even necessary.

I would how ever recommend not acquiescing to her simply to keep the peace. That's how men in LTR's generally cede their power over to women.

In general we tend to be more "big picture-centric" and so let the woman win the "this stupid shit not worth the hassle" battles. Little by little before you know it youve given over almost all authority in the home. Not by being a pussy but rather by not giving a crap about trivial shit.

Ironically the more power a man cedes to placate a woman the less attraction and respect she will have. And eventually she ends up with complete disrespect , disdain and ultimately disgust...because they are wired to be attracted to bigger/stronger/ more powerful (figuratively as well as literally) Its evolutionary biology

If your going to stay the I would suggest doing as Zel has suggested and read the material (Rollo Tomassi and The Rationale Male) he mentioned.

You need to learn how to at least maintain your current frame and maybe regain some ground.

She needs a little dread / fear / doubt

[Easy_C]

This is just idea-thinking on my part....since I've never actually been in this situation myself. I simply have never been in a relationship with any girl who likes tattoos, since tats, odd haircuts, and masculine dress are all massive turnoffs for me.


First idea to pop in my mind would be to strike a bargain, and set the bar so high that she's sure to say no.

Something like that if she does get a tattoo, it has to include one that says something like "Property of IstillloveVistaBaby".

[PapayaTapper]

(08-17-2017 06:39 PM)Easy_C Wrote:  

This is just idea-thinking on my part....since I've never actually been in this situation myself. I simply have never been in a relationship with any girl who likes tattoos, since tats, odd haircuts, and masculine dress are all massive turnoffs for me.


First idea to pop in my mind would be to strike a bargain, and set the bar so high that she's sure to say no.

Something like that if she does get a tattoo, it has to include one that says something like "Property of IstillloveVistaBaby".

(08-15-2017 02:19 PM)Jetset Wrote:  

Tell her it's fine, as long as it's your name.

[wilhelm]

break up

[realologist]

Give her a mushroom tattoo

[godfather dust]

I was with a girl for months. She showed up one night with a full back tattoo. Broke it off within a week.

[questor70]

(12-31-2017 05:13 PM)godfather dust Wrote:  

I was with a girl for months. She showed up one night with a full back tattoo. Broke it off within a week.